Because Cows

I'm 22 and I like to make people laugh and also I love cute things

[nonbinary-adhd]

i think its kind of funny how ppl dont believe me when i say 'i forgot' bc i genuinely say it so much that theyre just thinking to themselves 'shit man theres no way this dude actually forgets that much' and then i get to watch them slowly realize that yes, i do actually forget That Much after watching me forget what i was saying in every convo the moment smth distracts me

[nonbinary-adhd]

me: oh sorry dude i totally forgot to wash the dishes today

them: u say that like every time, ur just making excuses

me, earlier: [too busy doing a hyperfocused research session abt where the wax goes when u burn candles to remember to wash the dishes and then gets distracted from that search to look up the age of a character and then remembers i need to feed my cat but gets distracted in the middle of that to take a shower and THEN feed the cat and then eat lunch and watch a video while im eating and then i get invested in the video and watch another in that series despite being done eating and

[nonbinary-adhd]

btw the wax just evaporates. like when its liquid it just... evaporates and thats where the wax goes

[vsrobotjulie]

reblogging partly for the relatable adhd moment but mostly for the part about the wax

[ripe]

🌸🐸🌺

[rosecrystal]

tarot card necklaces by sofia zakia

[90377]

Petit-déjeuner complet by Marc Andreu

[shacklefunk-deactivated20220623]

My grandpa got his first spam email and he called the police

[taco-bell-rey]

when you gossip to your friends and they prove it wrong

[jvedi-blog]

fashionably late? more like anxiously early

[shymagnolia]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[shymagnolia]

okay so i just got my dream job??? a week after applying to it?? and now i’m thinking….maybe this is the good luck post

[flagellant]

…..not even six hours later i got an offer of a well paying full time long-term job with free room and board in queens in nyc, allowing me independence and a way to escape an abusive situation and an unhealthy environment

likes charge reblogs cast, folks, this is the good luck post

[somecutething]

Surprise!

[marmalade-cabin]

ahhhhh!!!

[cherrypiereadytodie]

des

[cherrypiereadytodie]

pa

[cherrypiereadytodie]

[kitduckworth]

not enough voluminous skirts with pockets big enough for apples

[greelin]

$50,000 immediately dropped into my bank account wouldn't improve EVERYTHING but boy it sure would be a grand, sexy little start to a good, happy life path, don't you think

[meilintheempressofdreams]

Reblog for unexpected $$$ dropping into your Bank account.

[sjdsjkdlskdas-deactivated202012]

adhd is so funny it's like being possessed but with myself

[sjdsjkdlskdas-deactivated202012]

the demon that controls my body says we have to watch bob burgers for five hours today and that demon is me

[rubykinn-deactivated20150629]

me: *points to space* !!!!!!

friend: ????

me: *points to space more violently* !!!!!!!!!

[catsbeaversandducks]

Low Resolution Cats

Via Sad and Useless

[m-a-n-d-u-s-a]

Is this Minecraft?

[osakaxkobe]

[valtsv]

me: okay, before we go through with this, i just have one question. is the aversion to garlic like, a lactose intolerance thing where you can consume it but you’ll regret it later, or is it more of a severe, potentially lethal allergic reaction kinda sitch?

vampire: *pausing mid-bite* why… does it matter?

me: i’m just not sure if this immortality deal is really worth it if i can never eat garlic again

[valtsv]

no but seriously. how much garlic does it take to actually repel a vampire? there are no specific measurements as far as i’m aware, which on the one hand suggests that it’s just any amount at all, but on the other hand it makes vampires look kind of weak and shitty if they can be successfully warded off by a speck of garlic powder in my blood

[valtsv]

vampire: now, i know you’re new to this whole vampirism thing, but using that much garlic in your cooking surely can’t agree with you-

me: buddy, i was lactose intolerant before i turned. i’ve suffered worse for less.

[valtsv]

angel: aren’t you supposed to be repelled by salt? that must be so painful

demon: i’m already damned to eternal torment in hell, do you really think i’m going to torture myself with bland, unseasoned food as well? no thank you *pops another salt and vinegar chip in their mouth and winces*

[valtsv]

faerie: you are aware that iron dampens our magic, right?

other faerie: i will die before i stop eating chocolate and that is a threat

[silver-tongues-blog]

millennial supernatural entities are unstoppable