Beejamoose @beejamoose - Tumblr Blog

the corpse of a flea became lodged in the frame of a porthole on the evening of June 3rd, 1802, preventing an airtight seal. 30 sailors were killed by ingestion of night air in their sleep

cheddar-baby

the cave diver was reduced to a giggle. He was pronounced happy one minute before rescuers arrived

tofutii

puppygirl potion 💉

markadoo

child: why do they sell board games in bookstores

loving parent: because there's a manual in every board game

child: oh

child: why don't they sell cars in bookstores

loving parent: because when you're buying a board game, what you're really buying is the rules, and those are in the manual. a car manual with no car can't drive you, but if you have the manual to a board game you could play it without the pieces. there are people who can play a game of chess just by saying where they're moving the pieces and imagining the board, but it's very hard so they give you a board and pieces to help you.

loving parent: That's why you never see Mousetrap in bookstores. Because you can't play it with just the manual.

child: whats Mousetrap

moral: kids these days don't know about Mousetrap

orteil42

unconvinced i'll ever find "the vitamin" that makes me all better so i can get real work done but i do expect they'll elucidate whatever my deal was post-mortem, after which what i did manage to accomplish with my life will be regarded on the level of Beethoven composing despite being deaf or Gordon Ramsay cooking despite being british

revilonilmah

We be shroomin

shortcircuit908

instead of saying "it's over" when things go bad, try "it's ova". this situation is egg now. you gotta hatch it into a beautiful baby opportunity.

rickybabyboy

I got a job! I hope I can just slack off...

rickybabyboy

(Here's a transparency if anyone wants to put Ricky somewhere)

cherrysodacan

sure hope that sound wasn’t anything to worry about!

rickybabyboy

they cut my scene

hungwy

the only real sciences are ones that have been independently discovered multiple times. this results in the following list of true sciences: toxicology, soccer and its variants, wage theft, and burying your friends in the sand up to their heads

trollingpig

You forgot meat balls

hungwy

art, not science

juney-blues

i love budokai 3 but fuck whoever decided to add "dragon rushes" to the game.

"hell yeah what if we spent like 3 fucking minutes in an unskippable cutscene super like 5 times a match, and your only meaningful input for all of that time was fucking guessing which button your opponent pressed so you can make it end sooner"

juney-blues

okay i'll give a little benefit of the doubt. it's actually a little more fun when you're playing against another person. neither of you are probably gonna do it once you've seen the cutscene a few times and are bored of it, and with an actual human opponent, there's the opportunity for genuine mindgames and guesswork, trying to psyche the other player out.

in a single player context though it fucking sucks. the AI is incapable of getting bored, and you can't psyche out a random number generator, so whatever level of interest there was is just gone. every time your opponent goes red you just give up and try to run the fuck away until they exit hyper mode lest you wanna spend the next minute playing Look The Other Way instead of the fun and engaging fighting game.

juney-blues

this is something that doesn't matter at all even slightly, but certain story fights give you unlockables if you use certain moves during them, (y'know to recreate the story of dbz, using the special beam cannon during piccolo's fight against raditz or whatever)

only thing is

some moves are just special finishes for the dragon rush minigame...

so if you want that Voice Data or whatever,

have fun gambling :D

the-punforgiven

Dark Souls onion knight voice: "Oh, hello there. I'm pondering how best I can serve the transgender community, but I'm positively stumped! I've got to think of the proper way to do things, but I'm stuck at quite an impasse! Not to worry, though, I'm sure I'll think of something..."

*you hit the talk button again* "Perhaps I should remain as a cisgender ally, for cis men have such privilege that could be used to protect the vulnerable, and voices that can be heard when transfems are ignored..."

*you hit the talk button again* "Perhaps I should transition as well! No truer help than bolstering one's ranks, haha!"

*you hit the talk button again* "But then again, regardless of my feelings on the matter, that would deprive the trans community of an ally in my position, which could be dire..."

*you hit the talk button again* "Hmmm. Hmmmmmm..." <- this dialogue line loops forever until you continue the onion knight's questline