hi! maybe you know me or maybe you don't. i'm an aging disabled genderqueer who has been living on this site for ages. i've shat posts, written poems, made music & videos too. i also host a few tumblr communities like my book club.
i have been unable to work for a while & am currently surviving in a low income apartment with help from family support, weekly plasma donations, commission orders & pawning old items. i am in a tighter spot than ever now with little help from assisted living services so far.
if you have enjoyed anything on this blog & want to help me live:
theme songs for just about any story or idea you have
background/AFK/intro & outro music for streamers and youtubers
8-16 bit retro sounds for game projects
battle songs, lofi, from breakcore & triphop to classical & country
and literally everything in-between
CURRENT PRICES (REDUCED):
$30 for a 0-2 minute song
$60 for 2-3
$90 for 3-4
$120 for 4+
i got my start playing live instruments with my dad as a child, & have both self training & classic training influences under my binder i mean belt. i made the transition into digital production about 9 years ago, although i still live record as well & enjoy blending both mediums.
i have completed quite a few orders since then! there is no genre I consider off limits, but i will tell you if I have less experience with something in your request. for more questions, just DM me or send an ask. have a safe day.
You all thought I was gonna go to bed at a reasonable time!? NO, I'm going to draw more catified Spy X while playing scrabble with @bodacious-energizedprotodermis!!! (And absolutely decimate him with my big, juicy brain).
Additionally, what was up with the Crisis in the first place? Why did the Rival Trio (+ their honourary member, Sawyer) not get involved beyond exiting the stadium? Scratch that, how come the competitors in the League not get involved? Why did Serena get benched alongside Mairin and Bonnie when the Zygarde-Megalith Construct was going about? How did we get all the Gym Leaders but not all the Elite Four?
Forever thinking about the missed opportunity of Mairin. How she was a new Trainer on her own journey who decided to chase after mysteries (of man and mon). How she travelled to an entirely different region because of it. How she witnessed the might of Legendaries, how that scared her, how she endured anyways to protect her friend. How she was left behind regardless. How she chased him back. How she was rejected regardless. How she rejected her partner Pokemon in turn, and how she lost him too.
I feel like she had so much narrative relevance that went to waste so easily. She has (techincally) studied Mega Evolution! She knows how to collect Mega Stones! She's friends with a Champion (and has some relationship with the Professor as well)! She's in Team Flare headquarters for majority of S3! Her Starter is literally connected to Zygarde! It's so mind-boggling how she played zero part in the Crisis; how her only role was to be somewhat involved in the formation of the Zygarde-Megalith Construct; how she didn't do anything in XYZ overall. It just,,, it really doesn't make any sense to me. She's so much more active than that.
Sure, she loves Chespie and she's scarred from the events of TSME. But she's stubborn. She's resourceful. She's been in the room of geniuses at work. Sure, she's a kid and she's dealing with her partner Pokemon suffering an ailment nobody can heal. But she's also a kid whose faced down one end of the world scenario before, and she's always wanted to be involved, and now she has a purpose to it. And more than anything, having Chespie down should've pushed her to face the problem that Alain's always worked for - how far would she go to save the ones she loves? What lines will she cross? And after all's said and done... can they go back to the journey they once had, the people they once were?
I'M STILL NOT OVER IT I've always wondered what was the difference between Alain pre-TSME and post-TSME considering he's still on a journey to protect the ones that he loves (and never really talking to them about it :/) but recontextualizing it with the above in mind means so much! To me! In particular it is insane.
Before he was out and about with Professor Sycamore in mind - an adult who had never asked anything of him beyond staying connected, who already saw worth in him as he was, who was given absence in response because Alain thought danger could happen. Not that it has happened, as far as the latter was aware, but the possibility of it was there. Was looming. Was possible. Then he meets Mairin and her enthusiam and her willingness to go the distance; Hoenn and the Megalith and the Weather Trio rampaging and harming everything in sight. He actually faces danger. Fights back against it. Almost loses, and is then saved - not by his own hard-earned strength, but by someone who care about him who make an active choice to help him in his time of need (and Steven too). Because of Lysandre's manipulations and his own self-worth issues Alain rejects it and trains harder back in Kalos, abandoning everyone via sneaking away because while he does care about them back he can't face them as he is. He defines himself by his usefulness, and since he's in the negatives in the scoreboard he's got rigged in his head, he has to make up the deficient. And yet, Mairin doesn't give up. She's still making an effort. She is, to him, unchanged. Still wanting his companionship regardless. Still worrying over him. Still seeing him as the same person in return.
He snaps. For once, Mairin can't push back against it and she leaves, and maybe Alain felt bad about it, and maybe it was the fuel he needed to beat Malva when previously he had struggled greatly with Siebold. Because it was never just about proving strength, it was about what he was going to use it for. And in wake of meeting Mairin, he's finally gotten an answer. He's finally found someone to protect (TSME Part II) but also someone who will protect him in return (TSME Part III).
In wake of Chespie's slumber, Alain is given a purpose while Mairin is given grief. After all, he's finally vindicated! Bad things do happen! This is what he's been training for! But he has to do something now that the worst has come to pass. While Mairin has to wade through emotions and contemplations and face darkness, Alain has to face the light and bring hope to her. It's no longer about prevention. One cannot prevent all the bad outcomes in life. But the journey he takes post-TSME / XYZ is one of remediation instead. It's of working to right things that have occured rather than avoiding what could have occured. In a way he also needed to confront the reality of harm befalling in unfair contexts and realise that while it may be inevitable, the actions he takes are his own. And so not only is he helping her in her own terms, he is also learning the importance of that difference and working on his own internal biases, which then will help when finding out the true nature of the Kalos Crisis and evntually aid in his reconcillation with the Professor as well. But only! If he works beside Mairin instead of for her. Because that is not how grief works. And that is not how life works either, for both parties. Can anyone hear me.
becoming bureaucrat of the wiki means im finally freed of my shackles and can add Carmen and Gray as potential love interests without fear of the absent admin rising from the dead to smite me SO NOW ALL THE ANGRY SHIPPERS CAN LEAVE EVERYONES PAGES ALONE
carulia's reference also got an update to be more descriptive ❤️
vaporwave
snowghoul
turnnoffyourmind
discoholicmusic
stormborns
tangentwithtanner
yousharknotpass
