The great thing about other people is that they will never know your past. No one except yourself can know you in every context, or know your mind. We try and communicate. We think words, photos, emotion is enough. But you can never transport someone to a past version of yourself. Considering this limitation, it is ridiculous to allow other people to judge the validity of your decisions or life. They don’t see you with clarity or have the ability to adopt your perception and way of processing the world. Take all criticisms with a grain of salt. When you have tapped into your core and know your essence- any external judgement, from society or an individual- needs to be assessed on your own terms.
A comment was made from someone close to me, regarding my No Drink November. Telling me it was a write off and half-assed. The thing about personal health is that it is idiosyncratic. Everyone is at a different place with their mental, physical, and spiritual health. And every person needs to decide what health means to them. They needs to incorporate measures that are realistic and attainable for them. If someone decides that once a week they will not consume fast food- it is up to no one but themselves to decide if that is enough. If someone decides they will jog for 15 minutes a day- it is up to no one but themselves to decide if that is enough exercise. If someone who has at least one drink a day decides they want to commit to one month sober- it is up to no one but themselves to decide if that is enough time.
You never know where someone started, or what it took to bring them to a better place. Everyone’s pace and everyone’s path is so different. Your knowledge of what other people think and feel, what their desires and cravings are, is vastly limited. What people choose to share and what you assume will never be sufficient grounds to assess the validity of someone’s approach to improving their life.
Yes, a month isn’t a year. A month isn’t a lifetime. But it’s a start. Setbacks can happen and I’m not willing to assume a perfect version of myself will transpire ever. Provided I stay in tune with my deep self and focus on my health and awareness, I will be fine. It’s not a matter of discipline, will power, or commitment- purely making choices that nurture my being on every realm. If I can dwell in that frame of mind, growth will occur. I’m not here to judge my relapses and setbacks, bringing more negativity and pain into my life. I’m here to live in harmony with myself and with others.
It’s vital to have love for your demons. Meet pain with patience. Life isn’t to be had, it’s to be experienced. You would see no light without darkness. I do not aspire to be completely happy. I aspire to live at my natural pace, to bridge the gap between my deepest needs and my actions, I want a life that teaches me gratitude and appreciation through challenges and successes. I’m not going to be perfect, and I’m making peace with that.