BFRB Hub

Reducing BFRB stigma one post at a time

[bfrb]

Wow i didnt know there were so many people like me out here 🥲

Ive been picking every part of my skin for forever. Ive had excema as well, so it was an easy excuse. I would go hide in the bathroom for hours a day just picking. I was way too embarassed to tell anyone until the excema got better and my face was still covered in gouges. I had to ask for help. My s/o and i decided if i was in the bathroom for more than 10 minutes he would kidnap me lol.

Its not perfect, but seeing other people dealing with the same thing and being open with the person i love has helped to much

Dermatillomania alongside other skin conditions like eczema is its own special flavour of hellish, but its great that you've been finding help in your loved one!

[bfrb]

I have a couple of questions if you don't mind. 1. Does it still count as trich if it's mainly on places where I have unwanted hair like chin hair/pubic hair? It started intentionally, but now I do it unconsciously and all the time :(. 2. When I was talking to my sister about how I might have derma/trich she told me it was self-harm. Is this true?/I don't do it intentionally, to me it's like breathing. One minute I'm doing something and the next my hands are ripping things off my body 😕

Hiya!  Trichotillomania can affect people in multiple places, not always necessarily the top of the head (I personally have only had urges and compulsions to pull out my arm hair) I’d say that even if it’s not a place you want hair to grow, is still definitely considered trich if the urges you experience are compulsive/obsessive (basically, you have an overwhelming NEED to pull the hair out, to the point it can cause damage to the surrounding area). So to answer your first question, yes absolutely it can still be trich even if you don’t normally want the hair to grow there anyway (many people with trich will say that they experience the urge to pull pubic or armpit hair) Sometimes, the fact that the hair is unwanted can potentially make someone have compulsions to pull that area even moreso than others, since it feeds into the classic BFRB notion of “gotta make it smooth) To answer your second question, BFRB’s are not considered to be self harm. While in it’s exact definition, it can definitely be argued that “it causes injury to oneself”, it’s not strictly considered to be inherently the same boat as self harm, and that’s a lot down to the ‘intent’ of the action. For those who struggle with self harm, while the action may be out of their control for whatever reason, the intent is specifically to cause damage. When it comes to BFRB’s, the intent isn’t to cause that damage to the skin, because the goal is to fufill a compulsion of squeeze that spot/pick that scab/pull that hair. And often, yes, it does end up causing damage, but it’s more of a side effect than anything else.  While BFRB behaviours aren’t inherently self-harm on their own, it would be disingenuous to say that there can’t be an overlap between the behaviours, and some people who struggle with both BFRB and self harm may find themselves intentionally triggering their BFRB with the goal of causing that harm. Here’s a link to a good article by The TLC Foundation that goes into more detail about this : https://www.bfrb.org/learn-about-bfrbs/treatment/self-help/289

I hope this helps <3

[bfrb]

Interested subjects must be between the ages of 18 and 65 and showing symptoms of Trichotillomania (Hair Pulling Disorder) or Dermatillomania (Skin Picking Disorder).

Research study includes: Questionnaires, being randomized to an experimental drug or placebo, and 5 study visits over 10 weeks (in office or via telehealth).

Qualifying subjects will be compensated.

This research is being by Dr. Jon Grant at the University of Chicago. 

Contact Eve (Study Coordinator): [email protected] or 773-702-9066

[bfrb]

hihi!! Uhh so I know i have dermatillomania, and often it’s my cuticles I pick at, but I’ve got a question. I have a lot of like weird pasty stuff on my scalp, and I find myself scraping it off just to get it from under my fingernails? Sorry this is really gross 😅 I was just wondering if it was related to dermatillomania?

Scalp scraping was actually one of my earliest manifestations of dermatillomania, I'd spend hours scraping. It's not gross at all - In my personal experience this behaviour was definitely a form of picking for me

[bfrb]

Anyone who submits questions - any questions are asked with anon off I will automatically answer privately unless clear permission is given for them to be posted publicly

[bfrb]

hi.. i think i might have dermatillomania, but im not sure... the last time i tried to bring up the fact i think i might have ocd, my psychiatrist brushed me off. skin picking is starting to hurt and takes up hours of my time!! do you know the main differences between regular skin picking and the disorder before i bring it up to him?

I can understand your difficulty, it can be odd to recognise a behaviour you’ve had as being something potentially disordered, especially when you’ve experienced it for a long time.

Specifically addressing your psychiatrist brushing you off, I’m sorry that you’ve experienced that. If you do choose to bring it up again, it may be helpful to think about the terminology that you use. It’s natural for other people to want to catagorise BFRB’s like dermatillomania as a bad habit, because a bad habit is something most people understand and are able to relate to. 

It’s generally accepted that BFRB’s fall under the OCD umbrella in terms of the type of disorder it is, as well as being an impulse control disorder, so using descriptors like “obsessive” and “compulsive” are essentially going to force people to re-catagorise something they had understood as a “bad habit” to accurately reflect the way that BFRB sufferers actually experience their disorders.

Regarding your question - “Do you know the main differences between regular skin picking and the disorder before I bring it up to him?”

Self-grooming is a natural behaviour. Most people in their lifetime have picked a scab, squeezed a spot, pulled out a stray hair and picked their nose, I think you’d find it very difficult to find someone who’s never done one of those actions.

 And even as someone with dermatillomania, there have been times when I’ve picked a scab and not really felt that it was “in line” with the way I experience my disorder, but that instance isn’t a reflection of the hours I can spend picking at my skin, nor does it represent the sheer impact that it can have on my life, both in the time it takes or the issues it creates with my self esteem. 

In my personal experience, I believe that the difference between normal self-grooming and dermatillomania is rooted in the compulsion of the action.

Below are some questions for you to consider, and will help you decide if your picking is something that’s consistent with symptoms of dermatillomania.

Do you ever feel that you NEED to pick, and become agitated or stressed if unable to?

Do you feel a sense of relief when you’re able to pick? 

Do you often find yourself examining your, specifically looking for an area to pick, even when there’s no reason to?

Another resource that can help you is this: https://www.skinpick.com/node/3805 It’s a test created by people who experience dermatillomania symptoms, and will generally give you an idea of whether the way you experience it is consistent with dermatillomania. I really hope that you find this answer helpful, and please feel free to message me in the future if you have more questions you would like to discuss!

[bfrb]

bfrb

Our disorders disguise themselves in plain sight. 

It’s more comfortable for others to believe that we have a stubborn habit than it is for them to understand we’re experiencing a disorder that clings to our daily lives.

[pickitperfect]

when you’re having a good time but then someone makes a joke about having ocd

[bfrb]

I never see scalp (skin) picking tips :( Do you have any?

Scalp picking is probably one of my earliest forms of dermatillomania, it can be really rough. 

In my experience, I’ve found that using shampoo brushes or gloves in the shower helps me avoid picking at my scalp (when it’s wet is the worst trigger for me) Anti-dandruff shampoos helps prevent buildup on my scalp, so removes that trigger too

Often when I’m laying in bed at night, I just find my hand wandering towards my head, so Sometimes I’ll play with fidget toys as I’m falling asleep. 

I hope this helps!  If any of my followers would like to share their tips for scalp picking please do! 

[sunnyegg87]

You are more than your Dermatillomania.

[pickitperfect]

friendly reminder that dermatillomania is very real and is not a phase and doesnt go away on its own!!!

[gentle-aria-deactivated20260101]

Self-Care Apps and Resources

🌸 Hiya everyone! <3 I’ve recently found some nice websites, forums, and apps that help with learning and keeping track of emotions, venting anything on your mind, or if you need someone to talk to!! If you know of anymore, let me know and I’ll add them to the list!   🌸

Venting

Vent App- This is an awesome app/social media platform where users can vent out their emotions and meet people with similar interests! It also has a private option for a diary to keep track of your day, and having your profile public is optional. If you just need people to listen and give support, this app is great. Should be available on iOS and android ;v;

Blahtherapy.com- this website is a great place to anonymously vent to a stranger using fruits and other objects as anonymous nicknames. Helps me a ton when I need a direct listener! Random people will be able to chat with you directly, and is once again completely anonymous.

r/OffMyChest- for Reddit users, this subbreddit is dedicated to just saying whatever is on your mind on letting it go. Many of the people in the subbreddit are willing to listen. 

Supportive Amino- for those not familiar with Amino, it’s an app that allows you to find various forums based on interests. In this case, I found this Supportive Amino dedicated to seeking emotional help and venting. There are probably others you can find as well on Amino!

Emotional Support

r/KindVoice- another growing subbreddit that is for users to meet with someone with similar interests and seek company and support. It’s a small but very helpful and supportive group. 

Calm Harm-an app for iOs and Android that is specialized to help provide calming activities to people with suicidal thoughts or are in extreme emotional support. Very adorable app that provides numerous distracting, relaxing, and all kinds of activities depending on what you need to calm and get over the urges.

Booster Buddy- another cute app that helps set schedules and activities to keep track of your mental health. It uses adorable animal characters, and also reminds you to take medications, set self-care routines, and remind you of appointments. Great way to keep track of you mental health journey ;v;

Pacifica- an app to help reduce anxiety and depression through various scheduled therapeutic activities! :) I believe it allows you to connect the app to your therapist for contact purposes! Contains a lot of stuff including podcasts, mood entries, and sooo many other tools to aid you! 

General Self Care

Flo Period and Ovulation Tracker- helpful app for tracking your periods, ovulation, and allows you to have a sort of health diary to keep track of symptoms and other feelings you may have! It also can remind you to take any medications or pills, and gives helpful health insights. It has the ability for you to set a code too to keep it private! 

Plant Nanny-aahhh this app is so cute! It serves as a helpful guide to remind you to drink the healthy amount of water you need by taking care of your own cute plant! Drinking your water also helps take care of your plant. Such a cute app to help! 

Aloe Bud-super adorable app that’s basically your all-in-one self-care guide. It has nice 8-bit pixel pastels, and reminds you to hydrate, breath, socialize, and many other things! I think you need iOs 11 or above to use it, but you can still check it out! <3

These are all I got for now, but please make suggestions, I’m always willing, and I really hope these help ;v; 

[queerdraws]

I may make this a zine later but for now here’s a list while i’m thinking about it: 1) Accept it happened so you can move on Obsessing over how you picked isn’t going to unpick your skin, but keeping yourself agitated about it might stress you out enough to go back for round two.

2) DON’T EXFOLIATE A WOUND DO NOT use exfoliating face wash within a good 48 hours of picking.  We don’t exfoliate gashes, we shouldn’t exfoliate facial wounds either.

3) Gentle face wash I use Cetaphil daily facial cleanser. Try not to scrub or pull at your face too hard or you might open up your wounds more and delay healing.  Aggressively sanitizing your face usually only does more damage & can hurt the integrity of the rest of your skin (your sheild!), leaving you open to getting painful deep cystic acne from any passing dirt in the air.  If you have an especially deep wound, GENTLY! wash it out.  If it feels kinda zingy like a splinter (like there is something Not Right in there) use an antibiotic cream.  Avoid things like hydrogen peroxide, as tempting as it is, it mostly just bleaches and flakes up your skin and makes things very painful, dry, and difficult to heal.

4) Gentle moisturizer As soon as you pat your face dry, slap some moisturizer on there to keep in that precious healing energy.  Make sure to use an unscented uncolored (?) (unpigmented?) moisturizer that is at least marginally suitable for use on / around wounds.  Again, you don’t want to irritate your skin further.  If nothing else, having itchy, burny skin is going to make you hyper aware of it & that tends to be ermm bad for derma.  (e.g. i learned that even though my snail face cream is really nice on closed scabs, i don’t want to use it within 24 hrs of picking or else it burns) I use an aquaphor (what people use on healing tattoos) knockoff for the really bad wounds & I use neutrogena hydroboost gel-cream for all-over gentle moisture. 5) Leave it alone Slap a bunch of bandaids over it or put on some gloves if you need to.  Distract yourself with something until you no longer feel that vibrational pull to the mirror.  Your skin (mostly) knows what it’s doing.  It can repair itself, but just like with tattoos and piercings, the more you fuss over it, the more you risk it getting messy.  Look out for signs of infection over the next few days & take them seriously. In the meantime, you can try using Distracting techniques like watching a show you like / listening to music / taking a shower / scrolling tumblr to get your brain to Chill.  Whatever works for you.

Good luck  <3 Side Note: Other people are oblivious.  I know that paranoia where it feels like the world is staring at your inflamed face.  Even when people notice, they tend to think it’s your standard acne.  AND Those who would recognize it as self-inflicted are usually other people with dermatilliomania (and are probably experiencing some sort of “same hat!!!” feeling).  When you’re feeling really paranoid / self-conscious, you can try wearing sunglasses to hide a bit of your face, it helps a lot for me (even though my sunglasses don’t cover a whole lot, it makes me FEEL covered and that’s all that’s important.  Whatever helps you get out of the house afterwards)

[bfrb]

BFRB Coping Techniques

Substitution 

Substitution is like a replacement, less harmful behaviour that still allows you to feel like you’ve picked. 

Fidget toys- There’s a huge range of other fidget toys out there that you may find is better suited to what helps you keep away urges to pick – I’ll go over a few of them, but if you’re looking for inspiration it’s worth looking into the stimming community since there’s always new wonderful fidget toys that people are discovering there. You never know when you might find the one that suits you best!

If you decide to look into the stimming community for ideas of things that may help, please be aware and mindful that stimming is used by autistic people (like me!) and those with ADHD. It doesn’t traditionally cater to BFRB’s specifically, but there may be methods and fidget toys shared there that you could find useful.

Tangles- I find tangles to be particularly useful. I always have one with me any time that I anticipate being still (in class, queue’s, on the bus) because being idle is a big trigger of mine. Being able to have something that occupies my hands helps to lower the occurrence of getting urges to pick in the first place! 

Chewellery- In short, chewellery is jewellery that can be chewed. Something like this may be useful for biting replacement, especially if the chewellery you’re using is particularly finger-shaped, such as the kryptobite. Chewellery can come in different levels of softness and hardness to suit the type of force that you usually tend to use to bite.

Mochi animals- Small squishy creatures that almost have stretchy, jelly-ish consistency that can be pulled, pinched, and picked at. These can be found online relatively cheaply.

Fidget cubes- Like plain tangles, they can be something that you find useful because it keeps your hands occupied before the urge to pick can occur. There’s a lot of different shapes and designs that these can come in now thanks to the popularity of these tools.

Liquid latex- Often people will recommend putting glue on your fingers, and peeling it off to help deal with an urge, however liquid latex is designed to go around your cuticles to help keep your skin clean when doing nail art, which can also be peeled off. This stuff is meant to go on your fingers so I’d recommend it over glue

Peel masks- Along with liquid latex, gel masks can be put on your face and peeled off to help stimulate the peeling feel

Peeling oranges- I wouldn’t recommend this if you already have some wounds on your fingers (Ouch!) but there’s a lot of satisfaction to be taken in peeling the skin off of fruits.

Nail polish- If nail polish is something that you enjoy wearing, then do! I pick off my nail polish quite a lot. With this one I’d suggest investing in a good nail oil – picking off nail polish isn’t amazing for your nail care, but it might be better than going to town on the rest of your skin.

Avoidance For some, sight is a trigger. Discolourations and irregularities on the skin can be triggering, but for some avoiding those visual triggers entirely may help reduce the potential for a picking episode. Below I’ve noted some common methods that people use to visually avoid triggers.

The types of triggers that people have are unique and individual. If avoidance is a tactic you’re using to try and recover from a BFRB, it’s important to be aware of your personal triggers to effectively avoid them.

Nail Polish - While nail polish can be used as a medium to pick at, it’s also useful as a way to avoid seeing your nails if that’s something you may find triggering.

Mirrors- Avoiding mirrors isn’t always possible, but I’ve found that keeping a clear focus on what I have to do after using a mirror can sometimes help me to avoid getting pulled into a picking episode. 

Clothes- Wearing long sleeves or gloves. This doesn’t always work so well, it’s easy to just roll up your sleeves or take off the gloves, but if sight is a trigger, then it may be something that works a bit. Putting on gloves well before an urge to pick even occurs may work better than putting on gloves because you’re already getting urges to pick.

[bfrb]

Hey there! I think your blog is wonderful!! Thank you for all the tips and motivational stuff on here. I was just wondering, do you have any tips for cheek biting? Because it’s one of the least represented BFRBs and the only thing I can find is chewing gum (which I can’t do as it gives me headaches)? Goes it doesn’t use my hands so fidget toys don’t really make a difference, Again thank you for keeping this blog 😁😁

Hi anon! Thanks for your ask today. Recently I’ve been much more aware of the way that I, and other people with BFRB’s treat eating compulsions. I’m planning a post about coping mechanisms for eating compulsions in the future, so definitely stay tuned for a long post about about that very soon. It’ll have a lot more detail than I’m probably going to be able to give on this post.

I totally feel you on the chewing gum giving you headaches, that’s never worked for me either. Something that I find useful with managing all of my particular BFRB’s, is substitution. 

With eating compulsions specifically, I’m not convinced that eating gum is similar enough to the sensation to provide the right stimulation (altho what doesnt work for me can still work for someone else!)

For managing my eating compulsions, I find that eating small pieces of shaved coconut is really helpful, because the sensation is very similar to biting small bits of skin from my nails. This could be worth trying out if the sensation is similar enough!

Along with that, there are specific stim toys that are designed to be chewed, such as chewellery (jewellery designed to be chewed). With cheek biting specifically I’d look for something that’s able to fit into the back of the mouth to chew with your molars, as lots of chewellery is designed to be chewed with the front of the mouth.

Particularly with cheek biting, eating something like pastry can help as it can stimulate that same “peel away” feeling.

At the moment, these are the two things that I use to manage my eating compulsions, but as I said, I’m planning a post in the future about how to deal with eating BFRBs. If any of my followers have any ideas, please add your recommendations on this post!

I hope you found this useful!

[kalesbug]

Trying to find something to motivate myself and I found this little line from Van Gogh

[drywalldust]

My skin has healed a lot :) and I've been picking very little recently, controling myself very well.

[bfrb]

Congratulations!