[biblefuckers]

its been a minute but hey

[biblefuckers]

in case you were wondering how mature i am as an immortal entity john stepped on my tail today and i pouted under the sheets for at least an hour without talking to him

[blindjokes-blog]

can i offer the soul of the place nextdoor. it has parties on its own with no one inside. it disturbs the customers. we could all do without it.

fine if eyes on the bottom of my feet is too hard can i have like a cheeseburger or something.

[biblefuckers]

ok yea i can probably pull a few strings and send a cheeseburger your way

[blindjokes-blog]

can i summon you and wish for eyes. like, not where they should be. but like somewhere inopportune like the bottoms of my feet. what would someone offer 4 that if theyre not even really sure they have a soul tho.

[biblefuckers]

thats literally the worst possible place to put eyeballs but if thats what you really want you can always offer me some other suckers soul

[biblefuckers]

grandpa dave here to confirm that being a demon is pretty baller but is it worth only ever being summoned by fourteen year old goths and old racists? is it? is it really???

[beeffizz]

becoming a demon seems like a good career option

[markvomit]

[skullgirllove]

[biblefuckers]

in other news bae made me keep the hellhound i accidentally summoned and he named it bruiser and now its drooling on my lap and making the house smell like corpses 

[biblefuckers]

me at the zoo: where are the dragons

[biblefuckers]

its a good thing i (as a high tier demon) get this weird itching feeling in my loins whenever a human says my name presumably to get ready to summon me so i can put a hold on what im doing because if i just got torn away from a tv show or some good diddling without warning it probably would not end well for that human sorry 

[flappyfireball]

also fun: being summoned with your own hand down your pants

[baconhells]

[biblefuckers]

i was telling john about some sad kids that i helped out today and he just stared at me and asked if id give money and food to anyone who called me pretty and yes. the answer is yes. absolutely

[biblefuckers]

wlndstorm replied to your post:wlndstorm replied to your post:wlndstorm replied...

that’s a small relief i guess. do demons lie? that sounds like something they would do. but i wouldn’t really know. i’m guessing you guys don’t exactly run by winchester lore.

we are pretty notorious liars but thats mostly when were trying to get a deal out of somebody thats not picking up what were putting down you know?? and im definitely not about to make you exchange your soul for the chance to whine at me so you dont really have to worry about me not being honest i guess (also supernatural is trash and not at all how this whole being a demon thing operates. why do people watch it theyre not even that hot)

[biblefuckers]

wlndstorm replied to your post:wlndstorm replied to your post “wlndstorm replied...

how well do you know whining about immense daddy issues?

admittedly im not super well versed in daddy issues but i probably wouldnt judge you at least

[ever-changing-ghost]

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