a handful of additional points
1. people saying you cant generalize this to mean all pansexuals are biphobic because the small sample size and qualitative nature of this study means it doesnt represent larger trends: sure, maybe. but what it does prove is that it exists. there are pansexual people whose understanding of bisexuality are biphobic and differ from the definitions of bisexuals AND that this difference causes tension and distress to those who do identify as bisexual. it may not be representative of every pan or bi person, but it does prove the existence and lived experiences of relevant people. (as an example, i would not discredit a qualitative study that interviewed 20~ single mothers about their experiences with the available social structures on their city and their effectiveness in supporting single mothers, simply because the sample size is small. their opinions are still reflective of real life issues that real life people experience, and that is worth acknowledging and considering.) so if youâre saying this isnât generalizable, youâre right! but it wasnât meant to be and doesnt have to be. if youâre saying it is useless and social sciences are bad as a result, i need you to consider that even the most niche group of people need their struggles considered and validated in the social sciences. small as the sample size is, if its a problem that exists, it deserves to be documented and discussed and if possible fixed. if there are 10 separate single mothers saying social services suck and theyre living in poverty, we need to acknowledge that this is a real issue. the same goes for these bisexual people saying that they experience tensions as a result of biphobic understandings of bisexuality by pan people.
2. people saying âbut iâve never met a biphobic pan personâ or âX person in my life is pansexual and i love them, vice versaâ: good for you! thats genuinely great and i donât want anyone to experience biphobia either, so im glad to hear it. at the same time, this isnât (necessarily/always) a critique of pansexuals as individuals. this is a critique of the label that functions exactly the same as âbisexualâ but constantly aims to distance itself from bisexuality. in doing so, the meaning of bisexuality keeps getting muddied because people who are, essentially, bisexual keep trying to define themselves differently. this is how biphobic and tranpshobic definitions of bisexuality come about. and so i have to ask: if bi and pan are the same, why do some people prefer to identify as pansexuality? to say âit just feels rightâ ignores the element of social influences that people often subconsciously act upon (in the same way some women will say they get plastic surgery to feel confident, but if you asked them why they get the specific procedures that they do, or why they felt unconfident before, you find that the root cause is the social influence of the existing beauty standards that make them dislike how they looked while also making them want to look a certain way).
we do not exist in a vacuum - our choices are often influenced by the views of society, even when we think they arenât. it makes sense to want to distance oneself from bisexuality when the label is so vilified. but distancing yourself doesnt allow you to challenge the stigma attached to bisexuality, instead allowing it to perpetuating while the people who do allow themselves to identify as bisexual are further villainized. to concretize this idea, consider the stereotype of bi people being exclusive of trans/nonbinary people. if i were to be someone attracted to all genders, i may feel like bisexuality doesnt fit me as well as pansexuality does. and i may feel this way subconsciously, without even realizing that itâs because i donât identify with the stereotype associated with bisexuality. and so i decide to identify as pan, and when people ask why, i just say âit feels rightâ. and so i never question whether or not the stereotype is true, and i never challenge it because i donât have to, now that Iâve decided to identify as the newer label that i feel is âbetterâ, all without ever questioning why it is i feel that way. and if i, subconsciously, judge bisexual people as being transphobic in the future, well then so be it, i guess. and so when someone asks me whats so different between pan and bi, i come up with something that furthers the misunserstandimg of bisexuality, like âi care about hearts, not partsâ, or âi dont just like 2 gendersâ, which erases the lived experience of decades of people who have called themselve bisexual all while miseducating others on what bisexuality means and furthering the stigma.
so i have to ask, if you identify as pan because it âjust feels rightâ, what is it about bisexuality that you feel is so âwrongâ? and i am begging you to ask yourself if the reason bisexuality feels wrong is because you have some unchecked stigma, misunserstanding, or bias against bisexuality as an identity. because if you didnt, i dont think you would consider it so bad when people equate bi and pan, or call you one instead of the other.
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