lying in my bed, i hear the clock tick and think of you. caught up in circles, confusion is nothing new. flashbacks, warm nights, almost left behind. a suitcase of memories, time after time. sometimes, you picture me. i'm walking too far ahead. you're calling to me, i can't hear what you said. you say "go slow" and i fall behind. the second hand unwinds. if you're lost, you can look and you will find me time after time. if you fall, i will catch you, i'll be waiting, time after time.
“no!” joey exclaims and her hands ball into fists, coming down onto the table in front of her. she lets out a laugh then shakes her head, “oh i need —- “ she breaks her own laugh and reaches for the pint of beer she had been avoiding for the past twenty minutes. she takes a big gulp then exhales heavily, “i will beat you one day, nuclear wings. one day!” she shakes her head, laughing, at the four wings that were left in the basket. “oof, y’all, my mouth is on fire!” and with that, she takes another drink from her beer.
with tears streaming down her face, she erupts into a series of coughs. she was never good at the whole hot wings thing. however, one thing she was good at was beer, specifically chugging beer. lifting up her cup, she drinks the contents inside, before slamming it back on the table. “i couldn’t even finish one, so you’ve got me beat. i don’t know how the hell you manage to do that. i’m tellin’ you, joey, your mouth and your hair all lead me to believe that you’re made of fire.”
TRIGGER WARNING: THIS INTRO POST CONTAINS MENTIONS OF MARIJUANA USE, CIGARETTE SMOKING, AND PARENTAL ALCOHOL ABUSE.
hello, new friends!! my name is mila and this is blair. she’s a bit of a mess. i’ve been lurking this group for around three weeks now. i have to admit that i was a wee bit scared, as i have never actually joined a group of this size! however, i am also incredibly excited to join you all, since this group seems so quaint. enough of my ramblings! you’ll find the information about blair under the cut!
blair ivy willoughby was born on october 1st of 1999 to darlene willoughby and charles willoughby in huntsville, alabama.
she is their one and only child and as a result, her parents often felt lost as to how to best take care of her. on top of this, her father got laid off when she was three, so her parents spent a lot of time trying to scramble to afford what they could.
her parents tried their best, but they spent most of their time mourning what could have been, rather than celebrating what is still in place. darlene spent most of her time passed out on the couch and charles would often either show up drunk to events that were important to blair or straight up get too drunk to show up at all.
when they weren’t abusing alcohol, they were going overboard with restraints on blair’s life. she wasn’t allowed to play with kids in her neighborhood, nor was she allowed to attend sleepovers with kids at her school. this lack of freedom led blair to feel stifled, as if she wasn’t allowed to do anything for herself. she either had to take care of her parents or lay in her bed and think about what she would do the next time she would have to take care of her parents.
in high school, she retaliated by hanging out with some bad folks. she wasn’t ever allowed to hang out with them outside of school, but she would often sneak off during school hours to smoke cigarettes, drink, get stoned, and listen to the throwback jams on the local classic rock radio station, while the posse’s “designated driver” would drive them around huntsville. the members of this crew were as thick as thieves. that was until one day, they weren’t.
merely three months after graduation, her father found out about blair’s absences through her transcript. he went on a tirade and decided to take it upon himself to call the other recent graduates in the neighborhood to figure out why. the common answer was that she spent most of her team sneaking off with the other stoners to do “god knows what”. her father was absolutely furious and proceeded to write her a scathing letter, telling her to “shape up or ship out”. blair chose the latter.
merely a week later, blair left a post-it note on the kitchen table. in this small note, she proceeded to call them hypocrites, told them that she was moving, and warned them not to follow her. from there, she took an aimless road trip to find a new home, one where she would be free to do whatever she wished without hypocrites tracing her every move. on this road trip, she created a game for herself. this game had one rule: once she saw a man in some sunday shoes on a tuesday, that would be her sign to move in. it just so happened that this sign was in frostford, alabama.
two years later, this area isn’t the dream, but she doesn’t regret moving here at all. she has the freedom to do whatever she wishes, even if it’s against her best judgment. she works at up in smoke to pay the bills, but her dream is to go to community college. she fears that it’s a bit too late to do so, since she didn’t have the best reputation in high school. alongside this, she fears that she’s slowly turning into her parents. she’s completely lost and needs the guidance that her parents never gave her and never had themselves. her number one goal of 2020 is to quit smoking. it’ll be hard, but it’ll be a step in the right direction. will she be accomplish her dreams and find older figures who genuinely care about her?
sorry that this was so long! if you want to learn more, take a look at her stats and her connections. please feel free to like this post or message me to plot! here are some wanted connections that i’d love to see for her:
a roommate, who she shares the rent with. whether they’re close or not close is entirely up to you.
a motherly figure and a fatherly figure. these two don’t have to be interrelated. she just needs the guidance.
a love interest. this could be of any gender, since blair is questioning her sexuality and thinks that she is most likely pansexual. i do slightly prefer females and nonbinary characters for this connection, but males are cool too!
close friends in frostford, who she can rely on when things get tough.
potential triggering content: drug use & alcohol abuse.
Q. Do you call your mother every day or only on occasions like her birthday, Mother’s Day, & Christmas?
“I don’t call my mama and my mama don’t call me. It’s easier that way. I sent her a card on her birthday. I don’t think she got it, but I sent it. In general, I give her some space and after everything that’s happened, she finally gives me mine. It’s a mutual relationship, I guess. I regret leaving her in the way I did, but you can’t really change the past.”
Q. What scent or song reminds you of your childhood? Why?
“I always remember my mama and pa singing along to Islands In The Stream in the front seat of that beat-up red truck they used to drive around in. We would go on road trips and they would have that song at the top of the little mixtape that they made. From there, my mama would sing Fancy, my pa would sing I Told You So, and it would almost turn into a talent show in the car. The only difference? My mom and my pa can’t sing a lick.” Blair explained, giggling and looking down as memories came running her way all at once.
“I heard that song on the radio the other day. I was on my way to work. I had to put the car in park in some random person’s driveway. I was cryin’ like a baby. I’m not a crier, but I guess the memories must have overwhelmed me or something. I know that moving here is for the best for my own sanity, but boy, do I miss them.”
Q. What’s one thing you’ll always stand up for?
“My freedom and independence. In fact, I wish I had done that sooner. It would have saved me a lot of trouble. I don’t like feeling controlled. All my life, I had to put up with feeling controlled. Every decision I made was on the chopping block. I could barely breathe. You can probably imagine the reaction others had when I started drinking and smoking pot. I was told I was ‘hanging out with the wrong crowd’ or whatever. What crowd? I wasn’t allowed to hang out with no one! No one at all. Besides, where do they think I learned it from? My pa practically raised me with a bottle of Jack Daniels in his hand and my mama was always passed out on the couch. The decision to move was mine to make and I made it. The fallout of that decision wasn’t pretty, but at least it was something I did because I wanted to, rather than because I had to. I don’t need anyone’s authority on my life, because my life is mine and mine alone to live. I just hope I’m not turning out like them”
Q. How did you come to find out about Frostford?
“After I left a note on my old kitchen table saying that I was moving and wanted no one to follow me, I just kind of drove around. I was eighteen and the drive was aimless. I had no set-in-stone place where I wanted to set my feet. I made up a little game with myself. My rule was that once I saw a man in some Sunday shoes on a Tuesday, that would be where I would settle down. It just so happens that the place where I saw this was Frostford. I’m glad I came here. It’s been two years and I finally feel like I have the independence that I need.”
Q. Are you running away from something or towards something?
“I guess both. On one hand, I’m running towards my own freedom and my independence. I never really had that while I was growing up. It’s something I craved throughout my life. I guess moving here was a giant step to do that. I don’t regret it at all. I can’t say I’m in love with this area, but at least I can do what I want without hypocritical vultures preying on my every move.”
“On the other hand, I guess I’m running away from any real connections I made back home, especially my mama and pa. It’s their fault, though. I was a grown adult at the time. They had no reason to treat me like a child, especially when they were off doing the exact same thing that I did. I do miss them. I hope they’re doing well. I just need to focus on me right now.”
Q. If there was a pie left are your doorstep with a welcome note, would you eat it or be suspicious?
“Of course I would eat it! With any good, believable pie, the baker needs to try their own ingredients. No one can try their own pie if there’s poison in it! Besides, a welcome note is incredibly polite and pie is absolutely delicious. Lately, I’ve been trying to perfect my own blueberry pie recipe. For some reason, it always comes out burnt. I don’t know how bakers do it. Maybe I should talk to one of them.”
𝖜𝖍𝖔𝖑𝖊 𝖑𝖔𝖙𝖙𝖆 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊. @blairwilloughby - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
