I'm fun sometimes. You're welcome.

she/her

[nosimpincurly]

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

[catherinebunnington]

Reblog to materialize $250,000 in prev's bank account

[blanketburritotoro]

If I reblog from myself, will it work indefinitely?

[blanketburritotoro]

My ace, and sex repulsed sister is buying herself a copy of The Kama Sutra so she can include better sex scenes in her writing.

She's all: "what? I'm not just going to be a fade-to-black author? I have standards! Listen, if I'm going to get nitty gritty with the rest of my shit, I'm not going to skip over the sex."

[nosimpincurly]

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

[catherinebunnington]

Reblog to materialize $250,000 in prev's bank account

[blanketburritotoro]

Okay, but. I was telling my roomate about a match I got on a dating app (before I panicked and deleated it less than 24 hours after making my profile) and I was explaining how I thought one particular match might have selected me by mistake, because she (first off, her photos were gorgous. She's gorgous.) didn't have any similar interests listed on her profile, and I was very clear that I am a massive nerd etc etc.

And my roomate looked me dead in the eye and said "dude, she can like all that stuff AND like nerds"

And I just

Okay

Shift my world perspective one random day at 3pm.

Damn bitch.

[blanketburritotoro]

Me: That's it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to put myself out there and actually try to meet people. Possibly even actually try to date.

Me: *joins dating app*

Also me not even 6 hours later when I check my phone and see women have liked my profile, and I have matches: *fights the urge to delete profile*

This is fine. I'm fine.

[cathartidae]

ⓘ You can Bite your Friends.

[cathartidae]

ⓘ reblog to fuckign BITE your mutuals

[blanketburritotoro]

My entire life:

People: wow. You look just like your sister! I can't tell you appart! Are you twins? I'll call you the other's name all the time! You're indistinguishable from each other!

Me (offended): wtf. We look like sisters, yeah but we look totally different. Fuck you assholes.

Recently:

Bestie's new girlfriend: oh. I thought you two were dating. I didn't know you were sisters..... no really. You look nothing alike.... huh....

Me (offended): First of all, we have the same face-

[blanketburritotoro]

Well.

*big sigh*

I saw my doctor today to renew my prescriptions.

She told me that my reading a lot and partaking in escapism and disassociation is probably a good thing right now.

Doctor sanctioned excessive use of ao3 let's goooooo

[transmascmikey]

reblog to give the person you reblogged from the strength to complete The Task™

[afniel]

This is the magic lucky word count. Reblog for creativity juice. It might even work, who knows.

[blanketburritotoro]

Okay. But no. Because one time I called my bestie up. Woke them up. Because it was bat-shit early. And opened the call with, "How bad does a cut need to be before you need stitches?"

I'm an absolute delight.

[sherlocking-out-loud]

I haven't seen this circulating here on Tumblr, so I decided to make my own post.

last saturday, in Porto, there was a pride parade going down the street and this old man was standing there, by his front door, waving the portuguese flag. most people on the parade probably thought the same: old person waving the national flag? he's probably protesting against the parade, he's a nationalist of some sort.

then the old man called for that person to come near him. the whole parade stopped. everyone just.. stopped moving. they didn't know what to expect, and most expected the worst. and that person decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and approached the old man. and then... they traded flags, he hugged the person and then he waved the pride flag happily. everyone cheered him.

such a wholesome moment. 🥹❤️🌈

[tortagnamgnam]

This is the lucky clover cat. reblog this in 30 seconds & he will bring u good luck and fortune.

[unclebabie]

THIS ONE!!! THIS IS THE ONE THAT WORKS!!!!!

I reblogged him the day i started treatment and 1. GOT TO MY APPOINTMENT ON TIME 2. FOUND A FREE PARKING TICKET SOMEONE LEFT IN THE METER FOR ME AND 3. GOT FREE STARBUCKS AFTER MY APPOINTMENT!!!!!

[cutedemonbabe]

I’m convinced bc I reblogged this on Friday, got hired at a job I had a million interviews for, went on a first date that went well, and got kissed a billion times so like hell ya to the luck cat

[j24354657687901]

I love the good luck cat. And we can all use a little luck

[blanketburritotoro]

Shout "OUCH" to my cat who, is a good lil' guy who doesn't want to hurt me, so he never attacks my bare feet, but who seems to think that socks are as good as mythril armor, and is bamboozled when I yelp with pain at his attacks.

[blanketburritotoro]

Me, placing my phone out of reach of my bed before I lay down to go to sleep.... I'm going to hate me so much when my alarm goes off tomorrow.

Update: ✨️it didnt work✨️I got up. Turned off alarm. Plopped back down into bed without fully waking up.

[blanketburritotoro]

Good news. There's an establishment near my home called "sushi burrito" which serves big ass rolls of sushi wrapped up, not cut up, so you can eat it like a burrito (fear not, no tortillas are involved)

Bad news. I'm so god-damn landlocked that I very rarely eat fish (since it's either NOT fresh. Or it's river fish, and just not to my taste usually), and my body does NOT know what to do with the un-godly amount of crab that I've imbibed from one ONE sushi burrito.

Good news. It was delicious.

Bad news. I WILL be eating another one.

[blanketburritotoro]

I've been considering writing fanfiction. I have some story ideas on my notes on my phone, I almost physically can not stop thinking up new scenarios and AUs, I've been seriously seriously considering it......

Anyway, in unrelated news: yesterday I got rear-ended by another car going 35mph while I was stopped.