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Mar 27, 2019

Shatter Me - Ch. 11

BTS Mafia! Au

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Genre: Angst, eventual smut (way later though), some fluff, comedy

Warnings: Violence, Death, Mental health triggers, Very light smut (VERY light. It’s not the full thing we’re all waiting for.)

Word Count: 15,301

Shatter Me Masterlist

After the morning fiasco with Yoongi, you went to your room to get dressed in a pair of leggings and a simple tee before heading downstairs to the dining room where the other members are starting to meet up.

“Are you ready?” You look over at Hoseok and smile with a shrug.

“It’s just a meeting, we’ve had tons of them. I know I’ll probably get yelled at for leaving the house and putting myself in danger, but what else is new?” Hoseok doesn’t say anything, just gives you a small smile before sitting down in his usual spot and you follow suit.

Taehyung takes his seat next to you but he doesn’t say anything. Usually, he would tell you briefly what the meeting was about and if it was anything you would have to pay close attention to, but not this time, this time he sits quietly and avoids eye contact with you.

What’s going on with everyone today? The rest of the members have started coming in, and no one has said anything to you, they just look at you with pity. You thought the pity phase was over with them. You’ve been here for almost a month now, and they all see you as a member rather than someone who was kidnapped.

Namjoon finally walks into the room, and you don’t fail to notice that he stops to say something to the guards that are standing outside of the door before he comes in. What the hell? They never have guards standing outside during the meetings. You look at Yoongi who’s in front of you with a confused look on your face, and he slowly averts his eyes down to look at the table. Okay, even Yoongi? Just what happened that you don’t know about?

“Good morning, Y/n,” Namjoon says as he sits down with his hands folded in front of him and elbows resting on the table.

“I wouldn’t exactly call it that, but hey, what’s going on?” You lean forward in your seat and look around the table at everyone. “You guys have barely talked to me, and you can barely look at me.” To prove your point, they all seem to look down at the table at the same time after you say that. “I know what I did yesterday was bad and I shouldn’t have done it, not that I regret doing it, but I don’t think it was that bad that you’re all acting like this.” It’s only Namjoon that doesn’t seem to have a problem maintaining eye contact or holding a conversation.

“We’ll get to that. First, we need to talk about what happened yesterday.” Namjoon’s tone is one that you haven’t heard since you first came here. That cold, no room for argument tone. “What did you two talk about?” You sigh softly and lean back in your chair.

“I told him that I would talk to him in place of Seolhyun because she’s innocent. He asked me why you guys were so adamant on finding him, and I told him I didn’t know. All I know is that he’s a bad man and you told me that if I helped you find him, then there’s a chance I’ll go back home.” Namjoon darts his eyes down to the table with the mention of your deal, but he quickly regains his composure and nods toward you to continue. “He gave me a deal that if I got all seven of you in the same place to meet up with him to “talk,” I would for sure get to go home.” You notice the boys glance up at you now. Oh, now that they’re brought up they want to look at me?

Namjoon’s face has hardened, and he raises an eyebrow. “So, did you take the deal? Are you going to tell us that he wants to meet with all of us somewhere?” He sounds angry, and you can’t help but look at him with shock and disbelief. Sure, it would be an easy way home, but surely, he doesn’t think you would do it, right?

“No, I didn’t take the deal, Namjoon. I know what would happen if he got all seven of you in one room - hell I know what he would do with just one of you. As much as I want to go home, I don’t want to see any of you die for it.” You’ve matched his angry tone, although you’re more hurt that he would think you would take such an offer than you are angry. “That was it; that’s all we talked about.” You don’t want to tell him about how Daesik said he could take you out of the restaurant or how you challenged him that he wouldn’t do it like that. If you told them that, they would just put heavier security on you, again.

Namjoon lets out a heavy sigh and nods. “Alright, thank you for not taking the deal, but now we have to talk about what we’re going to do because we can’t have you doing something like that again.” You furrow your eyebrows and cross your arms over your chest. You don’t like that sound of that. Not one bit. “We had a meeting yesterday, and we all agreed on the new rules.” You look around the table, and you feel frustrated. The least they could do is look at you when you’re being told the new rules that they all agreed on. “I’ve had keypads installed on all of the doors in the house. The rooms we don’t want you getting into will have a passcode, don’t have a passcode, can’t get in. This includes the doors going outside as well. I was going to have it be cards, but I’m positive you would find a way to get your hands on one.” Your jaw drops and you lean forward.

“So, you’re locking me in the house now?!” You sound pissed, and you are. At least before you were allowed to go out into the yard if you wanted to, but now you won’t even be allowed to do that.

“If it’s what we have to do to make sure you follow the rules, then yes, I am. That’s not all either.” He reaches under the table and pulls out a tether that goes around your ankle, and you laugh in disbelief. “You’ll also have to wear this. If you find a way out of the house, we’ll know right away because it will send an alert to all of our phones. If you go out with one of the guys and something happens to you, we’ll be able to track down your location.” You shake your head and laugh while rubbing your forehead as you try to comprehend everything.

“If you think I’m putting that thing on then you’re fucked Namjoon because I’m not.” Namjoon’s expression doesn’t change because he’s not worried about it. He knows he’ll get it on you no matter what, you just need to throw your fit first. “Look, I know I shouldn’t have gone out yesterday, especially without telling you guys first and I’m sorry, but isn’t this a little excessive? I can accept the locks on the doors, whatever, but wearing an ankle monitor like I’m under fucking house arrest? That’s a bit much. Don’t you think?” You almost sound desperate. You don’t want to have to wear that at all times now just because you did one thing without telling them.

“It’s not just because of yesterday, Y/n! We have an order to things, we have rules that have to be followed, and you’ve broken damn near all of them since you’ve been here. Not only that, but you go against all of our orders and do whatever you want which throws us all off and we have to accommodate you and what you decide to do. I’m not having it anymore. When I tell you not to do something, it’s not because I don’t trust you can, but it’s because we have our ways of doing things and our rules we follow to be successful while also making sure everyone stays safe.” Namjoon raised his voice slightly to get his point across, and you glare at him as he continues to talk. “I’ve been patient with you and let you get away with a hell of a lot more than I would anyone else because you were dragged into this and I knew it would take some time to adjust, but now you’re just taking advantage of that. Until everything is settled and you start going by my rules, you’re under house arrest.” Namjoon finishes and leans back in his chair, waiting for your reaction.

You sit there silently for a minute, processing everything he said carefully before looking him directly in the eyes. “Did Daesik have to do this for any of you too?” You hear Yoongi say your name softly, but you ignore him and shoot forward to lean in closer to Namjoon. “You gave me two options, right? Stay here and work or be killed, right? Which is something Daesik did to all of you? So, did he have to do this to you guys too? Are you taking a page out of his book? because it seems like you’re starting to read it cover to cover.” You sit back in your seat and sigh. You could cut the tension in the air with a knife, but that doesn’t bother you.

You roll your eyes and scoot your chair back, almost immediately, the two guards standing outside of the door turn to look at you as if you’re a wild animal about to run away. Ah, they’re here if you try to run away without getting the tether put on, of course. You don’t try to run though. What’s the point? It’s not like you could run away. The only place you could go would be your room, and even then, they probably had a keypad installed so you can’t keep them out. Instead of running away, you put your left leg on Namjoon’s lap. He looks confused, and you huff out a breath.

“Just put it on! There’s no getting out of it, and if you all agreed on it, then I’m outnumbered here, aren’t I?” Namjoon chuckles, clearly unamused by your new-found attitude, and places the tight tether around your ankle, locking it shut. It feels like a weight officially holding you down in this place and you feel the familiar burn of tears in your eyes, but you won’t let yourself cry, not in front of them anyway. You don’t want them to look at you with pity anymore.

“Alright, now that we know for sure that Daesik knows, we need to figure out a plan. We need to either reach out to him directly and finally end this or we need a different approach. Any ideas?” Namjoon pushes your leg off of his lap and faces forward once again, looking around the table at the other members.

“We should get into the cameras in and around as many of his buildings as we can. That way we can have constant surveillance on him.” Hoseok is now sitting up straight and talking with confidence. Something he was struggling with doing earlier when he was talking to you.

“Alright, that sounds like a good plan. You and Jungkook get started on that once we're done here.” Hoseok and Jungkook nod and now Taehyung is looking at Namjoon, a serious look on his face.

“Yoongi and I were talking about trying to get contracts with some of the same groups he does. That way he doesn’t have as much backup if worse comes to worst because they won’t be able to help without going against the contract they have with us.” Namjoon nods at Taehyung’s clever suggestion.

“Alright, get right on that.” He says before looking at Jungkook. “Try to get into their system to see who he has contracts with that we don’t and then send them to Yoongi and Taehyung as soon as you have even one.” Jungkook nods and stands up along with Hoseok and Taehyung, leaving you, Namjoon, Yoongi, Jimin, and Seokjin who have both been quiet the entire time. “Anything else?” Namjoon looks at you, and you shrug your shoulders while slumped in your seat. You don’t particularly feel like helping them at the moment.

“We could use Y/n as bait.” Namjoon snaps his head to Jimin with a slight glare in his eyes, and Jimin lets out an exasperated sigh. “Come on, Namjoon. You know he wants her, for whatever reason, he does. We could set it up where he thinks he’s getting what he wants, but we could have the upper hand and end it for all.” When Namjoon doesn’t say anything, Jimin rolls his eyes. “Don’t act like you haven’t thought about it.” Namjoon breaks his stare to look at you, and you hold up a peace sign.

“That’s not happening.” Yoongi’s voice is stern. He looks at you, and you shrug without saying anything. Namjoon glances at Yoongi before looking back to Jimin with a sigh.

“We’re not doing that under any circumstances. Not only would that put Y/n in danger, but it would also put us in danger because he doesn’t travel alone. I have thought about it, yes, but no matter how I see it, it would never end the way we want it to.” Oh, nice. He’s already entertained the thought of using you as Daesik bait.

Honestly, you wouldn’t care if they went with that plan. What’s the worst that could happen? Daesik kidnaps you? It’s not like you haven’t already dealt with that before. They have the tether on you now, so if that did happen, they could easily find out where you are and get you back. At this point, you don’t care what they decide to do because it’s not like you’re going anywhere.

“Alright, whatever you say, boss. Just throwing it out there.” Jimin does a mock salute before getting up from the table and leaving the room. Seokjin stands up to follow him, but he turns around at the door, raising his eyebrows as he looks at you.

“Y/n, do you want to come help me sort through the medicine and clean up the medical room?” You nod eagerly and stand up. You look at Namjoon and Yoongi with a quirked eyebrow before you leave.

“May I be excused from the table and may I go with Seokjin?” You hear Seokjin suppress a laugh behind you and Namjoon doesn’t seem amused in the slightest.

“You don’t have to ask permission to go around the house, Y/n.” You force a smile and nod.

“The keypads on the doors say otherwise.” Namjoon’s jaw clenches and you push your chair in before walking over to Seokjin, waving your hand behind you without looking back. “Thank you, Daddy.” You hear a large sigh from behind you, but you’re already in the hallway walking towards the medical room with Seokjin.

“You know the main reason we’re doing this is to keep you safe, right? At least that’s why I thought it was a…decent idea.” Seokjin stops to put in the passcode to the medical room, and you can’t help, but you laugh softly. Are you not even allowed to go into the medical room now? What if you have a headache and want some pain relievers? Are you supposed to get Seokjin every time? “Sorry, but there are a lot of pills in there, and we didn’t want to take any chances.” Ah, now it makes sense. They don’t want you sneaking in and taking a bunch of pills when they’re not around.

Fair enough.

You walk in, and Seokjin unlocks the medicine cabinet. “Just go through and make sure nothing is expired or if anything is low and write down the name of it so we can get more.” You nod and get straight to work start checking each of the labels, tossing any that have expired. “You know, not to be sappy, but you can talk to me. A lot just happened, and you can’t keep everything to yourself.” You laugh and shake your head at what he says.

“Oh, but I can, because I know anything that I say to any of you will find its way to Namjoon and that’s a headache I would rather avoid. I don’t need any more restrictions put on me because I decided to talk about how I feel about the ones that were just put on me.” As you continue to talk, you start sounding more and more frustrated while practically throwing the pill bottles into the bin. You take a second to breathe and compose yourself, refusing to look at Seokjin, not wanting to see any form of pity on his face.

It’s silent for a few moments. You can feel Seokjin’s eyes on you from behind, and once you’ve composed yourself, you take a deep breath and start talking again.

“I would have been fine with the keypads. So, what if I couldn’t go into any of the rooms or go outside without one of you? I was pretty much already doing that anyway. But a tether? Seokjin, I’m wearing a fucking tether around my ankle so you guys can know where I am at all times. I won’t be able to go to the bathroom without you guys knowing about it, and it just makes it so much more real that I’m fucking trapped here.” You can feel the tears from earlier starting to well up again, but this time, you let them fall.

You finally turn around to face Seokjin with tears streaming down your face, but you can’t meet his eyes. You draw in a shaky breath and slowly move your eyes to look at him.

“I just want to go home.” Your voice cracks before you finally start fully crying, lowering your head, so Seokjin doesn’t have to see your face as it’s stained with tears.

You feel arms wrap around you and you don’t fight them off. You stand there with your face pressed against Seokjin’s chest as your shoulders shake while you cry and he rubs your back in soft circles.

❃❃❃

“Ready…1…2…3…flip!” You flip your card and whine when Hoseok has the higher card, and he cheers. You reluctantly slide all six cards over to him and flip over your next card, smiling wide when you have the higher card this time and taking both cards that are on the table.

It’s been five long, uneventful days since you’ve had the tether put around your ankle and the keypads were installed on all of the doors in the house. You’ve mainly been with Jungkook, Hoseok, and Seokjin since their work is done from home like right now, you’re playing a game of war with Hoseok while you two wait for the system to decode Daesik's security on his cameras at one of his buildings, which takes a long time. You’re also sleeping in your room again. Call it petty, but the whole reason you were supposed to be sleeping in Yoongi’s room was that they needed to make sure you wouldn’t sneak off, but now you have the tether that will tell them if you so much as step outside without them knowing.

You do find it difficult not sleeping in Yoongi’s room. You’re tempted to go in there every night, but they also put the passcodes on the doors so it’s not like you can walk in like you usually would. Whenever you see Yoongi, he always stares at you like he’s desperate to talk and maybe try to explain himself, but he’s been busy creating contracts, and you’ve been busy with helping the other’s that you haven’t had the time. You still get those stolen glances and soft touches from him in passing, and it always makes your heart flutter, which also makes sleeping in your room that much more difficult.

You sigh, setting the cards down, and Hoseok looks at you with confusion and a slight pout.

“I was winning, Y/n.” He starts collecting up all of the cards, putting them back in the box.

“I know, you always win.” You look at the screen that is still working on decoding the security system. You don’t understand anything that’s on the screen, but you’re slowly starting to learn. You were almost able to hack into the system without Jungkook or Hoseok giving you instructions. “Hey Hoseok, can I ask you a question?” You say as you look over to Hoseok and he looks at you with a soft hum. “What exactly do you guys…do? I mean, I’ve been here for around a month, and I still don’t know what you guys do exactly. It’s all been about finding Daesik.” You bring your knees up to your chest and wrap your arms around your legs, looking at Hoseok as you wait for your answer.

“Well, I don’t know how much I’m allowed to tell you, but I’m sure I can give you the gist of it.” He shrugs and nods a few times before he turns his chair to face you. “So basically, each group or “gang” has their area that they run. The areas we run are typically cities or districts, and we keep tabs on everything. If we find out someone is causing trouble or if someone is selling drugs, we give them the option to sell or work for us, or we ruin their business. We sell weapons, most of them military grade, to either other groups or to anyone that can afford them. No questions asked. We are also “Loan Sharks”. To put it simply, someone comes to us to borrow money, and eventually, they will have to pay us back, and if they don’t,” He doesn’t finish his sentence, but instead, he just shrugs, and that tells you all you need to know about that. “Jimin, as you know, is a hitman so if someone comes to us with enough money, then he does that. All of the businesses in our district pay us a portion of what they make each month to ensure they stay open and stay safe from other groups.” You take in all of the information he’s telling you. You never realized just how much they did, and even then, Hoseok probably isn’t even telling you everything.

“Wait, you guys sell drugs?” Hoseok furrows his eyebrows and tilts his head in confusion, but then he slowly nods.

“Yeah, we sell drugs-” He sucks in air through his teeth and leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “Out of everything I just told you, us selling drugs stuck out the most? Not selling weapons, controlling districts, or contract killing?” He sounds confused, but when in reality, you already assumed they did those other things. You figure that if they’re a part of a gang or mafia, that it would be somewhat similar to what you see in movies, give or take some stereotypes. You didn’t think they messed with drugs, but you’ve been wrong before.

“I already knew about the contract killing. You guys have a bunch of weapons, so it doesn’t surprise me that you sell them, and you have to get your money from somewhere so it only makes sense that you would run districts. I didn’t think you guys messed with drugs because I’ve never heard anyone mention them.” Hoseok nods slowly and hums.

Just then, Yoongi walks into Hoseok’s office, looking at both of you briefly before he walks over to you. “Y/n, we need to talk.” His voice is curt, and you shake your head while looking up at him.

“I can’t right now. I’m helping Hoseokie with some work.” You point toward the computers with a fake smile. “See? I’m helping out and not causing any trouble like a good girl.” Your voice is high and mocking while you turn back toward the computers.

Yoongi grabs the back of your chair and spins it around, so you’re forced to look at him again. “This is important, Y/n. You’re going out on a job today, and I need to fill you in on what’s going on before you go.” You put your hand to your chest, eyes wide, and feigning shock.

“Me? You’re going to let me, the troublemaker, outside? Are you sure that’s a good idea? I might try something stupid like I always do.” You glance down on your ankle and laugh, waving your hands as you stand up. “Never mind. I forgot that I have the tether on so there’s nothing I could do anyway.” You wave to Hoseok, and he smiles while waving back. You turn back to Yoongi with a wide, forced, smile and you motion toward the door. “Let’s go. Wouldn’t want to make anyone mad by keeping them waiting, would I?” Your smile drops quickly as you walk out of the room.

You don’t make it far before Yoongi is gripping your arm tight in his hand, forcing you to look at him again with his hand firm on your arm so you can’t move away.

“Y/n, can we please talk? I get that you’re upset, but this is for your safety. I - we would be devastated if anything happened to you, just as we would be if anything happened to any of the other members.” Yoongi says almost desperately. Your heart pangs against your chest and your arms soften for a mere second before they harden once again.

“If you’re treating me like the other members, then why don’t they all have tethers? Why weren’t there always locks on the doors? Why are they allowed to leave when they want or even go outside?” Your voice is getting progressively louder, and you can feel tears sting your eyes once again. “You’re not treating me like you would any other member. You’re treating me like a prisoner, or how about, you’re acting like kidnappers.” You see Yoongi’s jaw clench, and his grip tightens on your arm.

“Fine, you know what? We aren’t treating you like the other members because if any of us did half of the things you did, we would have received a worse punishment than being kept in the house. We would have been beaten, killed, given off to Daesik to torture and kill, the list goes on and on of what would happen to us. You’re getting off easy.” Yoongi says in a harsh voice. He’s standing closer to you now. You two are nearly chest to chest, but you don’t let him see how much it affects you. You glare up at him, clenching your jaw without moving an inch and neither does he. “And the tether was meant to keep you in the house, so...” He pauses and lets out a soft sigh. “so why haven’t you been coming to my room? There were no rules made saying you had to stay in your room.” His voice is much softer than it was just a second ago, he seems softer, but you still want to hold your ground.

“Wouldn’t it seem weird to the others if I’m still sleeping in your room even though I’m wearing the tether and don’t need to be constantly watched over? What excuse would you come up with that wouldn’t raise suspicion? I’m sure the others wouldn’t like it if there was a thing, whatever this is, going on between us. I’m sure you guys would come up with some new rule for that too.” You finally take a step back and cross your arms over your chest. You’ve thought about this a lot since you knew it would eventually come up. You know the others wouldn’t like the idea of you and Yoongi having a thing, and with your luck, they’ll make a rule where you two have to stay separated unless you’re supervised. “Yoongi, I-” You’re suddenly pulled into the nearest room, which thankfully, was just a storage room and not one of the other member’s.

You’re back is pressed against the door once it’s slammed shut and Yoongi places each hand next to your head, caging you in while he looks at you with clouded eyes. “I don’t care what they say or what they think, Y/n.” He moves in closer so his chest is pressed firmly against yours and you feel your heart pounding with excitement as you look up at him while he’s looking down at you, eye’s moving as they search for any sign that you’re uncomfortable. “I never thought I could feel this way about someone. I never thought I deserved to feel this way about another person, but now that I do, now that there’s someone so strong, but at the same time, has such a warm heart that makes me forget all the bad things I’ve ever done and breaks down all of the walls that I’ve worked so hard to build up by just being near me.” He takes a deep breath and shakes his head slightly. “Y/n I’m not letting this- letting you slip between my fingers because of what the others might think.” Your heart is in your throat, and you can’t even begin to think of what to say.

You knew there was something between you two, but you didn’t know how serious it was or was going to be since you don’t know what the future holds for you here. You can’t deny your feelings for the man standing in front of you. When he looks at you, you feel like all of the air has been stolen out of your body. When he walks past, and you feel his hand brush against your back or your arm, your legs feel as if they would give out.

When he kisses you, you swear you could melt into a puddle, but you melt into him instead. His warm and protective embrace that stops your nightmares and makes you feel safe like nothing could hurt you as long as you’re with him. The way he makes you feel scares you because you’re on two very different paths in life. You are focused on getting the job done and going home, and that’s just what you plan to do, with or without him. He’s tied to this life with the things he’s done over the years that you don’t even want to think about. He couldn’t possibly go back to living a normal life after this, and you know he wouldn’t anyway because he cares too much about the others. You know what fate lies ahead for you two, but you don’t care. You only care about how you feel in this moment, with him right in front of you, and you know you can’t let him go either.

You open your mouth to respond, but no words come out. Your mind has gone blank, and you can’t come up with any words to describe just how you’re feeling here in this moment. You’re just looking up at Yoongi with your eyes wide while his are staring intensely into yours like he’s trying to read your mind for the words you can’t get out. You reach forward to grip his shirt in your hands, and that’s all he needs to understand.

He leans down to capture your lips in a heated kiss that leaves you breathless and feeling light on your feet. There’s a new fire burning inside you, one that needs Yoongi to keep it going, and you return his kiss with the same amount of passion and need. Your hands travel up his chest, and your arms wrap around his neck, tugging gently on his hair, eliciting a deep groan from Yoongi. It seems that that’s all it took for him to snap because next thing you know is his hand is gripping the back of your thigh, lifting your leg around his hip, and pressing his clothed member against your center causing you to moan softly into the heated kiss, now turned into need for each other.

Yoongi’s hand remains on your thigh while the other one slides under your shirt. You feel his rough, calloused hand slide up your side until he’s squeezing your breast causing you to let out another soft moan. He detaches his lips from yours and starts leaving a trail of hot kisses down your neck, biting the sensitive spot near your pulse point and you buck your hips forward as your eyes flutter shut, letting yourself drown in all the new sensations you’re feeling.

You feel hands tug at the bottom of your shirt and you lift your arms so Yoongi can pull off the offensive clothing. He pulls the shirt up to your breasts when he’s interrupted by the chime of his phone, and he lets out a disappointed sigh against your neck that sends a shiver up your spine. Yoongi rests his head on your shoulder as you both work to catch your breath.

You completely forgot that you two were supposed to meet up with Namjoon to talk about the job you’re about to do. You were so caught up in Yoongi that nothing else mattered. You forgot about everything around you two for those few heated moments, and you wish it didn’t have to end so quickly.

Once Yoongi finally pulls away, he pulls your shirt back down and presses another lingering kiss to your lips before stepping back.

“Namjoon is in his office waiting for us. You should go first so I can uh…calm down.” You tilt your head slightly, your eyes traveling down and you notice he has his hands folded in front of him and you finally snap out of your daze.

“Oh right! Uh… I’ll see you there then.” Your cheeks are burning, and you quickly open the door to walk out. You take a minute to compose yourself, fixing your shirt and your hair before you head off to Namjoon’s office.

You walk in a daze to Namjoon’s office. You keep remembering the feeling of Yoongi’s hands on your body, his lips on yours and your neck, and the way he felt pressed against you. You wanted nothing more than for it to last longer, at least long enough for you to explore his body like he was yours, but you’ll have another chance. You’ve already decided that you’re going to sleep in his room again, and that heat you just felt while you two were in a storage room will, without a doubt, resurface while you two are lying in bed together.

You finally get to Namjoon’s office and you knock on the door three times before you hear him say come in from the other side. You’ve been in his office a few times before, but it’s more like going to the principal’s office now because you’re usually in trouble when you’re called in here.

“Where’s Yoongi?” Namjoon’s eyebrows are furrowed in confusion as he looks to the door as if he’s waiting for Yoongi to walk in behind you.

You shrug and close the door behind you. “He said he had something to take care of and that he’ll be in soon.” You hope that Yoongi came up with an excuse because what else are you supposed to tell him? We were making out in one of the storage rooms and got a little heated, Yoongi needed a few minutes to try and get rid of his boner by sheer will so he might be a little late. Yeah, you don’t want to deal with the lecture and headache that’ll come from that.

“Alright then, we’ll get started without him.” He says as he motions for you to take a seat in one of the chairs in front of his desk. “We have a contract all set up for one of the major groups that’s located in the North, but we have reason to believe that he’s been relaying all messages to Daesik and the meet-up is going to be a setup.” You nod slowly as you take in that bit of information. It was bound to happen with how much power Daesik holds. Someone wouldn’t want to give up that safety and security.

“So…what? Are you going to call it off?”

“What? No. That would be cowardly of us.” Namjoon says as if it was the most ridiculous thing he’s ever heard. “We’re going to go, but with the knowledge that it is a setup. I plan to send in Taehyung and Jungkook to go over the contract, and of course, Jimin will be watching from nearby.”

“Then what do you need me to go for?” You say crossing your arms over your chest.

“Well, we know they’re going to be tapped into the security cameras. There are also the electric warehouse doors, and we know they have access to those already. Hoseok will guide you around the building, telling you each of the camera’s blind spots, so they don’t see you, and you’re going to get into the electrical box. From there you will turn off the power to the cameras so they’re blind.” It’s not a terrible plan. They thought it out.

As you’re going over the plan in your head, Yoongi walks into the room. He looks like his usual self. Like he didn’t have his hand up your shirt ten minutes ago. He takes a seat next to you, but you try not to stare at him too much. Instead, you look to Namjoon.

“If I’m cutting the power to the cameras, then you guys wouldn’t be able to see in either right? What are you going to do about that?” Namjoon eyes you suspiciously and you can’t help but roll your eyes. “Can you please stop thinking that I’m going to use any chance I get to run away? I’m asking because what if things go south, but you’re flying blind?”

“We’ll still be wearing our earpieces so we can hear what’s going on, and we have Jimin that will be our eyes on the situation. We’re hoping that they’ll think it’s an electrical problem. The person they’re sending won't accuse us of sabotage because then that means that they did have something else planned.” Yoongi says, and your mouth forms a small “O” and you nod. It makes sense, and they thought about the possibilities.

“Alright then, when do we leave?”

“Be ready to leave in an hour.”

❃❃❃

“Jungkook, I’ll kill you.”

You shove Jungkook off of you for the fifth time, this time with a smack on his arm. Every time the car turns, his body goes pliant, and he ends up squishing you against the car door. It was funny the first few times, but now you’re considering punching him.

“Oh, come on Y/n! Didn’t you ever play this game?” He says with a playful smile.

“Yeah, when I was ten.” He turns his lips into a pout but then the car is turning again, and just like the last times, his body is squishing yours. You let yourself be squished by his larger frame, and you can’t help the small laugh that escapes your lips as you start to smack his arms, back, chest, basically anywhere you can reach.

“Jungkook! You’re too heavy!” You let out a string of giggles as you try to push him off of you, but he lets his body go limp. “Jungkook!”

“Hey! It’s pure muscle. Don’t make me feel insecure.” You roll your eyes and look for your way out.

“Yeah, muscle mass is still heavy, dummy.” You contort your body until you find what you’re looking for. You lean down and bite the back of his neck. At first, he isn’t bothered, but you bite down harder until he’s pulling away from you.

“Ow! Y/n, you bit my neck you animal!” His hand flies up to the back of his neck, and he tries to rub the sting away. “That’s foul play!” He glares at you, and you shrug.

“Or sexy, depending on what you’re into.” Taehyung chimes in from the driver’s seat with a playful wiggle of his eyebrows.

“All three of you knock it off. Jungkook, stay in your seat, and Y/n, no biting anyone’s neck.” You hear Yoongi in your earpiece. You and Jungkook share a look that could only be described in one word.

Yikes.

“Ouch. Someone’s a little jealous.” Taehyung says in a playful tone, and you try to conceal your laugh.

“No one is fucking jealous, calm down.” Yoongi is stern, and you smile wide while looking between Jungkook and Jimin who’s in the passenger seat. “What would I be jealous of? Not having Jungkook crushing me? That’s hardly something to get jealous about.” He keeps digging himself into a deeper hole.

Jimin turns in his seat to look back at you and Jungkook with a devious smile on his face. “You know, the people with something to hide are usually the ones that talk the most hyung.” Jimin waits for a response, but all he gets back is a heavy sigh.

“Are you sure it was a bright idea to send them out together? Between the four of them-” He must have been talking to the others in the room and cut out his mic. Either way, it was still funny to all of you.

Another hour later you were finally pulling up to the warehouse. Taehyung had to stop at a building nearby to let Jimin out so he can get set up. You look out of your window at the warehouse. You can already notice two other black SUV’s on the other side of the parking lot.

“They must already be inside.” You look at Taehyung, and he nods toward the same cars, and you let out a nervous sigh.

“How do we know they don’t have people in them keeping a lookout? That’ll make our plan much more difficult if they see me.” You fidget in your seat. You run on sheer willpower, that’s how you’ve managed to make it this far. The only things you have going for you if you get into a fight are a few lessons from Jungkook, the gun that they make you carry, and your stubbornness.

“We’re in the cameras for now. If they get out of the cars or we have any reason to believe that you’re in danger, then we’ll get you out of there. Trust us.” Jungkook says reassuringly and rests his hand on your thigh. You nod and take a deep breath.

Once they have everything they need, they both get out of the car and head into the building. You envy how casual they are about all of this. They’re walking in there like they’re strolling into work at the warehouse like they do any other day. They both have a confidence to them that only comes from years of experience and the unbreakable trust they have in the rest of the group to keep them alive.

“Okay, they’re talking with Wonsik. Are you ready Y/n?”

You take a deep breath before putting on the black baseball cap they gave you, pulling it down, so your eyes are barely visible. “Yeah. Let’s do this.” You put on your face mask before carefully stepping out of the car.

After shutting the car door as quietly as you can as not to gain attention, you watch the cars on the other side of the parking lot with a close eye. If there were anyone in them keeping watch, they would have stepped out as soon as they saw you, but thankfully, there’s no one, and that’s your cue to go.

“Alright, where do I go?” Your voice is hushed, so it doesn’t get picked up by the audio on any of the security cameras. The mask is also muffling your voice, but thankfully, it’s clear enough that they can hear you.

“Keep walking forward until I say stop. When I say stop it’s crucial that you don’t move even a centimeter more or else you’ll be seen, okay?” Usually, when you talk to Hoseok, he’s bright and cheerful, but now you’re experiencing the serious Hoseok that works security under a highly ranked mafia group. “Once you start walking, don’t talk. This place is loaded with cameras, and if one doesn’t pick it up, it doesn’t mean that a different one won't.”

You don’t say anything and take another deep breath to try and calm your nerves before taking slow steps forward, heel to toe, waiting for Hoseok to call out when you need to stop. You keep your head up, facing forward, but your eyes looking around for any sign that someone is around.

“Stop!” You immediately stop and wait for further instructions.

“You need to turn to the left and walk in a large semi-circle. If you cut in at all, they’ll see you. They’ll only see your foot, but that would be enough for them to send someone out.” You’re amazed at Hoseok’s skill and precision.

Right now, he’s currently in his office connected to each of the security cameras in and out of the building, observing each one, measuring out each of your movements to be sure you don’t get seen by any of them. Yoongi and Namjoon are with him, watching over Taehyung and Jungkook who are on the inside. That way, Hoseok can keep all of his attention on you.

You walk confidently in a large semi-circle as Hoseok told you to do. So far so good. The cameras you’re avoiding are on the wall of the building and some light posts in the parking lot. You didn’t realize there would be so many surrounding the warehouse, but then again, you don’t know just what this warehouse is used for.

“Stop! You need to run forward to the wall right now!” Your feet move before you even register what Hoseok told you.

You run to the wall with light steps to keep the noise to a minimum. You stand with your back flat against the wall. Looking side to side, you notice the camera on the wall to your right slowly moves from left to right which means that somewhere under it there should be a blind spot.

“Okay good. This is the tricky part now because you have to follow the camera and get into its blind spot.” You stare up at the camera and watch it closely as you listen to Hoseok’s instructions. “You can follow it going heel to toe very slowly, and then once it’s facing the other direction, you’re going to run directly under it.” Your heart is beating against your chest, just one slip up and they’ll know you’re here.

You watch the camera and wait until it starts turning to the right. You follow it slowly just like Hoseok told you to until it comes to a complete stop. You have approximately five seconds to move before it starts turning to the left. Running as light as you can, you take quick steps and make it under the camera, pressing your body against the wall as much as you can so it won’t see you. You hold your breath and close your eyes to focus on the sound of the camera until you hear it stop again. Without waiting for Hoseok to give you instructions, you shuffle along the wall until you’re out of the view of that camera, and now in between that one and the next one on the corner.

“I’m going to assume you’ve already passed the last camera. This corner one is easy. You have to go in another semi-circle” You listen diligently and nod to yourself, immediately following Hoseok’s instructions again.

You make it around the corner and stop to look around. It’s almost an identical setup, but not as many cameras since there aren't any loading dock doors. You look at each camera and determine that it’ll be the same as the others, so you get to work making it around each camera until you’re standing in front of a large circuit box.

“Hoseok,” you whisper as softly as you can, but still enough that he can hear you. “I’m at the circuit. What do I do now?”

“There’s going to be a lock on the door. It’s just one that needs a six-digit code. I’ll read them off slowly, and you need to put them in.” You bring your hands up to the lock and wait patiently for Hoseok. “From left to right it’s going to be 021593.” You turn the dials to each number as Hoseok reads it off and the lock clicks softly when you pull on it, successfully opening it and the circuit box door.

“Okay, I’ve got the door open. Now what?”

“Look for the switch labeled “cameras.” Switch it off and then lock the box back up. From there you’re going to get back to the car quickly.” You scrunch your eyebrows as you look for the right switch, but these don’t look like normal circuit switches. They all seem to need a key for them to be moved. You even try moving the one labeled “cameras,” but all it does is leave marks on the palm of your hand and your thumb.

“Hoseok, I can’t move these. I need a key.” You whisper and look around, now paranoid that someone might be coming.

“What?!” Hoseok sounds just as surprised as you are. You try moving it again, but it doesn’t budge. “Jungkook and I checked the model though, and it shouldn’t need keys. Even the newer models don’t have locks for the switches. When we hacked into the camera behind you the other day to get the combination, all of the switches were normal, and there’s nothing in their records that show they had them installed.” Hoseok says, clearly unsettled.

“Unless they did it off the record. Had one of their men come in and install them before this thinking we would do exactly what we’re trying to do.” Yoongi finally speaks up, and you feel annoyed that the plan is ruined. “We’ll bring in the backup to be ready if things go south. Y/n, lock the box back up, and Hoseok will lead you back to the car.” Yoongi sounds stern, but there’s also worry laced in his voice.

“No. New plan.” You hear Hoseok counter, but you don’t say anything in fear that the cameras audio will pick it up. “Y/n you have that pistol, right?” You reach behind you and slowly pull out the pistol that’s tucked in the back of your pants.

“Yes.” You say in a quiet voice.

“Good. What we’re going to do is, you’re going to use the handle of the pistol to hit the top of the switch. Hopefully, we can get a wire to move even a centimeter or get the circuit to bug out to get the cameras to malfunction and turn off.” You furrow your eyebrows while listening to his new plan. Sure, it might work, but it’s noisy and obvious.

“Absolutely not. Are you stupid? If the noise doesn’t alert them, then the fact that the switch is broken will and she’ll be screwed because they’ll go straight for the car.” Oh no. Yoongi’s angry.

“I can cut out the audio the second that she hits it. They won’t think anything of it.” Double oh no. Hoseok is arguing with him. “If she hits it just right it won’t break the switch or leave a mark, it’ll just either move one of the wires or break the circuit inside.” It doesn’t sound like that bad of a plan when he explains it, but it still isn’t certain. “Y/n, I’m going to count to three. When I get to three, I need you to hit the switch. It’s crucial we do this at the same time or else they’ll hear it.” You take a deep breath and get into the right position to hit the switch with as much impact force as you can.

“I’m ready.”

“No, we are not doing this. Y/n don’t you dare do it.” You huff because of Yoongi. You aren’t upset at the fact that he’s acting this way, you understand because you’re scared that this is going to give you away, but if you don’t do this, then Jungkook and Taehyung are in trouble.

“1…2…3!” You hear Hoseok start counting down despite Yoongi telling you both not to do it, and you act immediately.

You bring your hand back and swing it back to the switch, successfully hitting the switch with the handle of the pistol, dead center with as much strength as you could muster up. You look behind you to make sure that it’s still clear and wait to hear if it worked.

“And we’re blind!” You sigh in relief at Hoseok’s cheery voice. “Great job, Y/n! Now get back to the car as quickly as you can.” He doesn’t have to tell you twice. You turn around and start walking toward the car with quick steps. You don’t want to be out there any longer than you have to.

You check behind you as you round the corner to be sure you’re not being followed. You peer around the corner first to check if it’s still clear, and when you don’t see anyone, you make a bee-line to the car.

“Are you in the car yet, Y/n?” You smile when you hear Yoongi’s gentle voice. You put your hand on the handle of the car and nod at your reflection.

“I just got to the car. Don’t worry. I’m the new ace!” You laugh and go to pull on the handle of the car, but you freeze and stop laughing when you notice there’s a new reflection of someone right behind you in the tinted window. “Y-yoongi…” You don’t get to say anymore because the man behind you grabs your shoulder, pulling you back with enough force to throw you to the ground.

You let out a sound of surprise and go to get up, but the man grabs a fistful of your hair and starts pulling you toward the warehouse, dragging you along on your knees. You can hear the boys back at the house panicking and asking you what’s happening, but their voices ae muffled by the sounds of your cries of pain as your hair feels like it’s going to be ripped out and your legs get cut up from the asphalt ground.

You try your best to pull in the opposite direction despite your head feeling like it’s on fire. You manage to get your legs in front of you, and you dig your heels into the ground and bring your hands up to tug and claw at his hands, but the man jerks you forward again. He finally stops in front of the warehouse door, but he doesn’t go in straight away. Instead, he reaches down and pulls the earpiece out of your ear and throws it on the ground, crushing it under his foot like the butt of a cigarette.

The man drags you inside, and you see Taehyung and Jungkook across from a man you can only assume is Wonsik. They’re both kneeling on the ground with their hands tied behind their back, and their weapons are on the ground in front of them with the remains of their earpieces by their feet. There are two other men with guns pointed at them. They both turn to look at you with wide eyes as the man that has a hold on you throws you in the middle of everyone.

“Leave her out of this.” Taehyung’s voice is low and intimidating Nothing you’ve ever heard from him. “She only does what we tell her to.” If looks could kill, all four men would have been dead the minute you were dragged in here.

“It’s none of my business what she does. I’m just doing what I’m told.” The man you assume is Wonsik sounds unbothered and almost bored.

You lift yourself onto your hands and knees and reach behind you to grab the pistol, but it isn’t there, it must have slipped out when you were thrown to the ground. One of the men sees you reach behind you and kicks you in the stomach causing you to fall back to the ground, but this time, he places his large boot on your upper back, rendering you immobile no matter how hard you try. The more you move, the more pressure he puts down until it’s difficult for you to breathe and you start gasping and coughing.

“Stop! I don’t know what you were told, but don’t hurt her when your problem is with us.” Jungkook keeps looking between you and Wonsik with worry evident on his face.

Wonsik didn’t like that apparently because he walks over to you with leisurely steps and kneels in front of you. He grabs your hair and pulls your head back, so you’re forced to look at him. “I can do whatever I want with her. She’s still the one that cut the cameras, isn’t that right?” His voice is condescending, and you don’t dare retort. “If I didn’t have my orders, I would kill you in front of them, or I would keep you for myself.” He throws your head back down, and you bite your lip, a soft grunt sounds in the back of your throat when your head hits the ground.

“That’s enough.” A low baritone voice that you immediately recognize says, and you freeze in your spot. “I told you not to harm her, just to bring her in here.” The boot on your back is off in a flash and you cough as you take in deep breaths and slowly bring yourself back up to your hands and knees. “I’m sorry, little vixen. I told them not to harm you.” Your head shoots up, and you’re met with Daesik kneeling in front of you with mock worry on his face. “What would you like me to do with them? I’ll kill them if that’s what you want.” You quickly shake your head.

“I don’t want anyone to be killed.”

“We’ll see.” He says before standing up to face Jungkook and Taehyung again. A humorless chuckle leaves his lips as he points a finger at the two. “You boys have been getting on my nerves lately. You just can’t leave well enough alone, can you?” He starts pacing back and forth slowly like a lion trapped in a cage. “You should have just let me continue running my business and minded your own. If you did that, we wouldn’t be in this little mess we’re in now, and I wouldn’t have any plans to kill you and take your newest recruit.” You slowly sit up on your knees, holding eye contact with the guy that previously had his boot on your back.

“That’s not going to happen.” Jungkook’s eyes never waver away from Daesik, even as he keeps pacing. “If anything, leave her out of this. Your grudge is with us.”

“Oh no, she will be mine.” He’s talking so casually it sends shivers down your spine. “It’s just up to all of you whether you let me have her willingly, and I treat her nicely, or I take her by force and treat her like a prisoner.” What kind of monster is he that he would talk about this as if you’re not right there? You go to say something, but he looks at you and shrugs. “Today is not the day though. It would be too easy to take her by force right now, and it wouldn’t be fair. You boys have to have the chance to hand her over to me.” He looks at the two men aiming the guns at Jungkook and Taehyung before looking at the boys. “Kill one of them. I don’t care which one.” With that as his final order, he leaves, and Wonsik follows behind.

Your eyes widen, and you go to stand up to do something, anything, but before you do, one of the men drops dead to the floor with a bullet in his head. Jimin. The other man follows soon after, falling to the ground with a sickening thud with a perfectly shot bullet hole in his head.

You move to stand up, but the third man grabs you by your hair again, holding you directly in front of his body. Now Jimin can’t shoot him without shooting you first. He’s moving between pointing his gun at Jungkook and Taehyung, making sure neither of them moves although they haven’t moved an inch since you were brought in here.

He lets go of your hair to wrap his arm around your neck, using you as a human shield to ensure he doesn’t get shot by Jimin. Your hands shoot up to pull at his arm, but he only tightens his grip, making it increasingly difficult to breathe. In a panic, you look to Jungkook and Taehyung for what you should do, but there’s nothing they can do with their hands tied, that and the risk of you being hurt even more.

It isn’t until you see the man holding you load the gun and put his index finger on the trigger that you decide to move on your own. You force your head down, the grip of his arm making it difficult, but you tilt it down enough to be able to bite a small part of his forearm. His grip loosens the slightest bit, and you’re able to bite a bigger chunk of his arm, using your hands that were already holding him to hold it firmly in place while you bite down harder until he finally lets you go and shoves you to the ground.

You hit the floor with a thud, catching yourself with both of your hands against the ground, causing a shock of pain in both of your wrists, but you don’t dwell on it for too long because in the next second, the man is kicking your stomach and you’re knocked to the ground. The air is knocked out of you and you cough as you gasp for air, slowly rolling onto your back, but he uses this to his advantage and gets on top of you. Your arms instinctively go up to cover your face like Jungkook taught you to do, and you hold them steady, more focused on not getting seriously hurt rather than fighting back at this point.

“Do you think I won’t kill you just because Daesik wants to make you his little bitch?!” He yells as he’s trying to pry your arms away from your face, but you’re using all of your strength to hold them steady.

In an instant, he’s knocked off of you by Jungkook who charged into him with all of his strength, hitting him like an angry bull. Jungkook was able to knock him off, but he’s still at a disadvantage because his wrists are tied, so it’s no surprise that the man is able to get Jungkook under him and starts relentlessly hitting him while Jungkook is forced to take it.

“Y/n!” Your head whips over to look at Taehyung, and he nods his head towards a gun that is now laying on the ground. It must have dropped out of his hand when Jungkook rammed into him.

You push yourself up onto your knees enough to start crawling toward the gun. Your body is in pain all over, but you have to push yourself for Jungkooks sake. You reach forward to grab the weapon and that finally gets the man’s attention off of Jungkook. A gasp leaves your lips when he jumps off of Jungkook and starts making his way back toward you. You lunge forward and grip the gun just as he gets to you.

He gets on top of you and starts wrestling you for the gun, but you only tighten your grip on the handle. You need to keep his attention long enough for the backup to come in, or even Jimin, anyone. It’s getting difficult though. He shoves your arms out of the way and wraps his large hands around your neck, and he starts squeezing with all of his strength. You can feel your trachea being crushed by his hands and you’re starting to feel light-headed while the edges of your vision begin to turn black.

You weakly bring the hand that isn’t holding the gun up to push his head away, trying to claw at his face, but you’re growing weaker. You can feel yourself on the edge of whatever is pulling you in, and you feel panic run through your veins. You’ve said before that you didn’t care if you lived or died, but if you die now, this man will kill Jungkook and Taehyung before Jimin could even get the chance to shoot him first.

“Y/n!”

You hear someone shout and you’re pulled back to the situation. You use what little strength you have left to curl your index finger out of shock and panic. You have to hope that it’s enough.

It is.

The force from the shot causes the gun to kick back and hit your stomach, and the sound has your ears ringing even more than they already were from the lack of oxygen. Your hand feels tingly while the ones that were tight around your neck just a second ago have loosened the slightest bit, but are still firm in their place.

“Y/n!” You don’t know who’s yelling your name. You can hardly remember where you are or why you’re here. “Y/n!” There it is again.

The man on top of you is kicked off by Taehyung, and you gasp as your burning lungs fill with air. You continue to gasp for air, coughing violently as you try to stay conscious, still teetering on that dark edge.

You look to the side to look at Taehyung, and his face is full of worry and panic. He’s saying something to you, but you can’t hear him over your breathing. You give up on trying to listen to him, and you turn your head to the other side where Jungkook is finally sitting up, his face barely recognizable with the black eye, cuts, and bruises that are covered in blood all over it. Next to you is the man that was just about to kill you, coughing up blood as he gasps for his own life.

“No…” Your voice is nothing but a whisper, and you push yourself up with weak arms. You toss the gun that you just used to shoot this man to the side while you look down at him. Tears quickly sting your eyes as you look at what you’ve done. “Oh god… I’m so sorry.” A weak sob leaves your lips, and you instinctively move your hands to press on the wound in the center of his abdomen to try and stop the bleeding, putting as much pressure as you can manage. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” You’re sobbing above him, and he looks up at you. Something flashes in his eyes, and you can’t quite figure out what it was. Something along the lines of regret mixed with fear, and it only makes it worse. “We can help you. W-we’ll take you to our doctor and fix you right up.”

“Y/n…” Taehyung says your name softly, his voice filled with sympathy.

“No! We can help him!” You shake your head and put more pressure on the wound, your hands now covered in blood. “It doesn’t matter who he works for or what he’s done. He’s still a person. Taehyung, please help me!” You yell in desperation as you put pressure on the wound with shaky hands. At some point Jimin must have come in and cut their ties because you feel hands on your arms, pulling you away from the man’s body and turning your head away into his chest.

“Y/n, he never would have made it back. Even if we could have got him back to Seokjin, his injuries far surpass what Seokjin can fix at the house.” Taehyung whispers next to your ear as he wraps his arms firmly around you. “He was going to kill you. It was you or him, and you acted out of self-defense. It’s not your fault.” He holds you close to his chest, and the embrace is comforting, but his words do little to set your mind at ease.

You killed someone. Took their life away from them before their time. How are you supposed to feel? Are you supposed to believe that it’s okay because he was trying to kill you?

You cling to Taehyung’s shirt, staining it with the blood on your hands. You can’t control the harsh sobs that are starting to hurt your already bruised chest. Taehyung cradles you in his arms, rocking your bodies back and forth with your head safely tucked under his chin. You decide to peek over at the man’s body, and it causes the blood in your veins to turn to ice. Seeing his lifeless body lying there, eyes still open, makes your stomach churn and you have to shove Taehyung away right before you empty the contents of your stomach.

You violently heave until there’s nothing left and Taehyung is right there next to you, soothingly rubbing and patting your back until you’re sure you’re done.

“There you go. I was waiting for that to happen.” Taehyungs voice is still soft and sympathetic, and he continues to rub your back. “Let’s get you out of here, okay? Let’s get you home and cleaned up.” He smiles as he slowly stands up.

You go to stand up with him, but he reaches down and scoops you up in his arms. You wrap your arms around his neck, and all four of you head out of the warehouse. You’re thankful for Taehyung carrying you because every part of you is screaming in pain. Behind you two, Jimin is walking with Jungkook’s arm slung around his shoulder, letting him lean against him as they walk to the car.

Taehyung gently sets you down in the backseat, buckling you in before reaching into the back to grab an old rag. He carefully grabs your shaky hands and wipes the blood off of them. They’re still stained red, but now at least they aren’t covered in sticky blood. He tosses the rag back into the back and shuts your door before getting into the driver’s seat.

Jimin helps Jungkook into the backseat as well. He makes sure that Jungkook is fully in before he gets into the passenger seat and Taehyung doesn’t waste time and starts driving.

Everyone is silent. No one wants to say anything because what is there to say? The whole plan went to shit in a way that no one was expecting. Everyone put in so much work and thought of every scenario they could to make sure nothing like this happened, but Daesik was ten steps ahead of all of you. Now he’s made his plans abundantly clear, and all of you have to come up with your plan on where to go from here.

You’re staring blankly out of the window, your hands folded in your lap, your breathing still ragged from how hard you were crying. Exhaustion starts to settle in while the silence in the car lulls you to sleep.

Jungkook scoots over to the middle seat and wraps his arm around your shoulders, letting you use his body as a pillow as you rest your head on his chest and let yourself fall asleep.

❃❃❃

Jungkook gently wakes you up once you all arrive at the house. Slowly sitting up you go to rub your eyes, but Jungkook grabs your hands to stop you, and it's then that you remember that although Taehyung wiped them off, there’s still blood on them.

You open the car door, and Taehyung is immediately at your side. He wraps his arm around your waist while grabbing yours to wrap around his shoulders. He holds onto your hand tight as you lean on him to walk to the front door and Jimin is doing the same for Jungkook.

The four of you are walking up the front steps when the door swings open, and Yoongi and Hoseok rush out. Yoongi pays no attention to the others and goes straight for you. He places his hands on your cheeks as he checks over your body for any significant injuries and he stops at your hands, seeing them covered in blood. He brings them up so he can look at them, but you pull them away.

“It’s not mine.” Your voice is still just a whisper, and it feels like hot lava when you try to talk. You look over to Jungkook and Jimin who are now heading inside with Hoseok holding up Jungkook from the other side and you sigh. “Let’s go in. I want to take a shower.” Yoongi stares at you for a moment before nodding.

“Yeah, of course.” He goes to your other side to help you walk into the house, his arm firmly around your waist, and you’re met with Namjoon and Seokjin waiting with worry written on their faces.

“First, let’s get you two to the medical room so Seokjin can patch you up.” You nod and carefully let go of Yoongi and Taehyung, but Yoongi’s arm doesn’t move from around your waist. “Y/n and Jungkook, once you’re done you can go to your rooms to rest. Don’t worry about working for the next few days while you’re recovering. We need to lay low for the time being anyway.” You nod again as Namjoon speaks confidently. “The rest of us are going to have a meeting on what happened and where to go from here.”

You start to walk away but Yoongi keeps his hold on your waist, and you look at him with tired eyes.

“I’m okay. I can walk. You have a meeting to get to.” You give him your best reassuring smile, and his arm slowly moves off of your waist as he nods. You can see him having a mental battle with himself before he finally walks away to join everyone else.

You follow Seokjin and Jungkook toward the medical room. You stop in front of your bedroom door, and they both stop to look at you.

“I’m going to take a shower first. My injuries are smaller so it’ll be easier if I’m clean and Jungkook should be taken care of first.” Your voice keeps going in and out as you talk, so you’re trying your best to keep the talking to a minimum.

Seokjin nods, but there’s still the look of suspicion and hesitation on his face. “Come as soon as you’re done.” If he wanted to protest, he doesn’t bother and walks away with Jungkook leaning against his side.

You walk into your room with a heavy sigh. Your whole body feels as if you’ve been run over by a truck twice and the image of the body of the man you killed still weighs heavy in your mind. Walking into the bathroom, you look in the mirror, and you can’t help the humorless laugh that passes your lips.

You look wrecked. Your hair is in a dozen knots from how many times it was grabbed. There are scratches and bruises all over your body and your face and there are clear streaks down your face from when you were crying because of how dirty you are. It’s been a while since you’ve looked at yourself in the mirror and it looked like you. You’re surprised you’re still standing at this point with how beaten and battered you’ve become or even from exhaustion, but you’re still doing it if it means you get to go home.

Wait.

You can’t go home now, not after you’ve killed someone.

Panic starts to set in, but you swallow it down long enough to step into the shower. Your hands are shaking as you grab the body wash and start gently going over your body with a washcloth. You can’t go home. You killed a man. You stand under the stream of warm water, watching as a mix of dirt and blood get washed down the drain. Most of that blood isn’t yours. You grab the bottle of shampoo and pour some into the palm of your hand before scrubbing it into your hair. You feel your fingers tug at the knots, but your body is numbed to the pain. You couldn’t possibly go home now. You stand under the water that’s starting to burn your skin now and let the shampoo rinse out. You reach for the conditioner, and you hold it tight in your hand. You’re working hard to push all of these thoughts away, but they’re just so loud. It was self-defense. It was your life or his. You repeat in your head. He was going to kill you. But you killed him instead, and now you can’t go back home because,

You’re a murderer.

You drop the bottle of conditioner, and it bangs loudly against the bottom of the tub. Tears fill your eyes, and your chest starts to hurt as you begin to sob violently. You desperately try to wipe away the tears that are being washed away by the water, but they keep coming. You can’t even begin to process what you’re feeling. You feel regret, sorrow, grief, and one that seems to be standing out the most, anger.

You’re annoyed that you got involved. Bitter because they kept you here instead of letting you go. You are frustrated because it seems like you’ll never get to go home and you’re furious that it got to a point where you killed someone. You took someone else’s life to protect your own when your life is no longer yours to live anymore.

Was it even worth it?

You ball up your fists and hit the tile wall with another frustrated sob. You do it again and again, alternating between each hand. When your knuckles ache you finally kneel, wrapping your arms around your legs as you continue to cry.

Never in your life have you thought you would kill someone. You were always one of those people that others would say “Oh she would never hurt a fly.” But here you are now.

A murderer.

You’re too distracted to notice or care that someone is in the bathroom. You continue to cry even after the water is turned off and the shower curtain is pulled back. A warm towel is placed over your shoulders, and there’s a hand gently pulling you up. You bring your hands up to cover your eyes as you continue to sob and Yoongi helps you step out of the bathtub, wrapping his arms around you, and you cry into his chest.

You don’t care that you’re still dripping wet from the shower. You don’t care that you’re naked and in Yoongi’s arms. You only care about the comfort you feel while crying into his chest while he pets your head and sways you side to side soothingly.

Once you’re crying has quieted down, Yoongi pulls you away slightly to adjust the towel around your body so you’re properly covered and you can’t help the tired laugh that escapes when you see how wet his clothes are now because of you. He doesn’t say anything, but you can see a small smile tug on his lips as he reaches for one of your smaller towels and starts to dry your hair.

“You should get dressed in something comfortable and then go see Seokjin to get some of these cuts disinfected.” You nod with a small hiccup from how much you were crying. You can’t help but to wrap your arms around Yoongi’s waist and pull him close again, but he doesn’t seem to mind because he wraps his arms back around you. “Alright, go get checked out and then come back to my room so we can go to bed, okay? Don’t even think about sleeping separately tonight.” You nod again, and he presses a soft kiss to the top of your head before reluctantly letting you go and walking out of the room.

You quickly throw on a pair of soft shorts and a plain T-shirt before walking out of your room in the direction of the medical room. Each step feels like there are weights attached to your legs and you want nothing more than to lie down, but you have to make it there, and then Seokjin will take care of everything else.

Everything feels fake.

Your body and mind feel numb.

It’s true that you would have died if you hadn’t acted first, but that doesn’t make you feel any better. When you first agreed to work with them, that was one exception you made. You didn’t want to kill anyone. You’ve always believed everyone’s life has value and people can still change for the better - even if sometimes it’s too late. Some people are just subject to dangerous situations, and that’s all they ever know. Sure, that man could have killed you, but you can’t help but wonder if there were any scenarios where both of you could have lived.

You force those thoughts to the back of your mind when you get to the medical room. You knock softly on the door and wait to hear Seokjin on the other side permitting you to come in.

Jungkook seems to have already left for his room, and Seokjin is sitting in his rolling chair while he waits for you to sit down on the bed.

“I don’t think this will take too long.” He smiles and rolls up to you once you’ve taken your seat. “Your wounds are small, so they just need to be disinfected and covered.” You nod slowly and watch as he starts with your knees first.

The disinfectant stings, but it’s nothing compared to half of what you’ve been through today. You stare blankly, watching as he puts ointment on the small cuts before moving on to your other knee. Once he’s finished with both, he grabs your hands with your palms facing up to start cleaning the scrapes you got from being thrown on the ground and then your knuckles that started bleeding when you hit the shower wall.

“Y/n, can we talk for a minute?” You’re pulled out of your trance by Seokjin’s voice and you nod.

“Of course. We’re right in front of each other.” Your voice is soft, not that you can get it any louder.

“I mean, can we talk seriously for a minute because I’m worried about you.” Your eyebrows furrow, but you don’t say anything, and you wait for him to continue. “How are you doing? And I don’t mean how’s your pain levels or anything like that. I mean, how are you doing? You’ve had a lot happen to you in just one month, and it’s bound to take its toll. You can’t keep everything bottled up all by yourself.” You avoid eye contact and let a sigh pass your lips.

It’s true. Everything that's happened has been taking a lot of your energy, and you’re finding it hard to be motivated to help them even with the promise that you’ll go home. It’s all weighing on your mind and you can only push away the thoughts that invade your mind for so long before you give into them.

Seokjin gently lays you down on the bed so he can feel your abdomen for anything unusual. It isn’t until he applies pressure on your ribs that you suck in a sharp breath and screw your eyes shut.

“That hurt?” You nod, and he feels around a bit more, and you have to grind your teeth. “I think you may have a fractured rib. It’s hard to say without X-rays, but either way, you’ll have to keep it wrapped up and try not to do any strenuous activities for a few weeks. I’ll give you painkillers, and you should have an ice-pack on it whenever you have the chance.” You let out a breath you were holding once he moves on to check your neck.

“I’m fine.” He glances at you, and it takes a moment for him to realize what you’re referring to. “I mean, it is a lot to handle, but I have to do it. I have to go home, so I’ll manage.” He feels around your neck without saying anything, and you feel like you have to keep talking to fill the silence. “Besides, it’s not like I keep everything in. I think I’ve cried more this month than I have in a whole year. I’m not trying to hide that I’m having a hard time.”

“Crying when you’re upset and talking about what’s making you upset are two different things. You can cry, and it could be because you’re frustrated, sad or hurt, but we don’t know how you’re feeling. You’ll find if you start digging enough, you’ll find emotions and feelings you didn’t realize before.” He’s been done with your examination for a few minutes, and now he’s leaning over above your head to look down at you, and you do your best to avoid looking at him.

“I’m…angry.”

“Okay.”

“I’m frustrated.”

“That’s fair.”

“I’m miserable.”

“Of course.”

“I’m resentful.” You keep going and the tone of your voice gets harsher with each word. Everything is coming to surface now that Seokjin has opened that door. “I was being strangled, and the moment I started to feel everything disappearing around me, I thought maybe it wouldn’t be that bad.” Your voice is shaky, and your heart is beating against your chest the more you keep talking. “I figured I was just in the way anyway, and at this rate, I’m never going to go back home. Then I pulled the trigger because I heard Taehyung yelling my name and it made me panic, but as soon as I did, I thought that it should have been me. I was almost there anyway.” A stray tear slips down your cheek, and you quickly wipe it away.

Seokjin has been letting you talk while he listens silently. After the first tear fell, he started to pet your head, letting you know that he’s fully listening and he’s there for you. You finally look up at him, and there’s a look of sympathy and concern all over his face.

You don’t want to dwell on the topic any longer, so you slowly sit up with his help, and you point to your neck. “Does everything look good?” Your throat is still on fire when you talk, and having this moment with Seokjin didn’t help it.

“Your throat seems fine considering you can talk and breathe without an issue. Just let me know if it’s difficult to swallow food or water, or if it starts to feel tight.” He offers you a smile before grabbing a medical wrap, and you lift your shirt revealing a garden of bruises all over your stomach and chest.

Seokjin wraps your chest delicately, being sure not to put any unnecessary pressure, but while also making sure the wrap is tight, so it does its job.

“Remember, you have to take it easy for a while. Put an icepack on it whenever you can, and if the pain becomes too much, take the painkillers.” You nod and take the small bottle of pills from Seokjin before slowly sliding off the bed with his help. “And about what we talked about earlier- “

“It’s fine.” You cut him off curtly. “I’m fine. You don’t have to worry about it, and I don’t want to talk about it.” He lets out a short sigh but nods anyway although you can see the hesitation in his eyes. “Thank you for fixing me up.” He says a quiet you’re welcome and you walk out of the room.

A part of you feels sorry for cutting him off when he just wants to help, but you don’t want to talk about it. You don’t want everyone tiptoeing around you while also watching your every move or always asking you how you’re feeling. Your goal is to help them and then go home, which begs the question of what you’re going to do about Yoongi because you have to go back and he can’t just leave. You absolutely will not stay either. The only way they could get you to stay is if you only lived here and had nothing to do with their work anymore and you got to see your family whenever you want. You could tell your family that you moved in with your boyfriend that lives far out of the city, and even further away from your hometown.

You shake away those thoughts for now. It’s not something you need to worry about at this moment, and you’ll have to come back to it eventually. Until then, you’re going to enjoy what you have.

Walking into Yoongi’s room, you see him already lying in bed while playing on his phone. He looks up when he hears the door open, and he gives you a small smile.

“Everything look okay?” His gruff voice is familiar and comforting, and you visibly relax as soon as you hear it.

You nod and carefully crawl into the bed, taking your spot next to Yoongi, lying on your side to face him, and he sets down his phone and turns on to his side so he can look at you.

“I have a fractured rib, so I have to keep my activity down, but other than that, it’s just a bunch of small scratches and bruises.” He brings his hand up to brush his fingers through your hair, and you close your eyes.

“That’s good. Well, I wish you didn’t get hurt at all, but I’m relieved it’s nothing too severe.” He moves closer, gently pulling you into his chest, and pressing his lips to your forehead before he lays his cheek on top of your head. “I was so worried about you. I thought Namjoon was going to kill me for how much I was freaking out and yelling at him for even sending you guys in there when we knew it was a setup.” He says in a low, quiet voice as he continues to massage your head.

“I’m okay. I did what I had to do.” You whisper against his chest.

You don’t have any more energy to give. Your body feels as if it’s melting into the bed and the soothing motion of Yoongi rubbing your head is making it difficult to stay awake. You want to talk to him. Talk to him about everything going through your mind. Tell him the things you didn’t want to talk about with Seokjin, but it’s going to have to wait because it’s almost impossible to keep your eyes open.

“For the record,” You let out a soft hum to show him you’re still listening. “I’m glad you’re the one that walked out of there.” He says in a voice that’s just barely a whisper, and you fall asleep with that still fresh in your mind.

You wish you felt the same.

#bts #bangtan #bangtan sonyeondan #bts fic #bts mafia au #Shatter Me series #Shatter Me #bts smut #bts imagines #min yoongi #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #Jung HoSeok #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook

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