“are you having an accident? do we need to go to the bathroom?” “no I’m not done!”
“Do you mean you’re not done with your puzzle? Or that you’re not done going potty?”
He shifts his weight from side to side, picking up a piece and snapping it into place. “I’m really close to being done with my puzzle.”
“It’s still going to be there when we get back from the bathroom.”
“No, wait, I’m really close to finishing it though and you’re distracting me!” He slides another piece across the table, this time sort of aimlessly, and I hear his breath catch a little bit in his throat.
“Are you sure it isn’t something else that’s distracting you?”
He doesn’t answer. A red blush is creeping up his neck as I kneel down next to him and rub his back. “I know you’re pooping. It’s okay, bud. Were pull-ups too hard for you today?”
He coils away from me and I think he’s still angry, but then he looks back at me with big, sad eyes, chewing on the first knuckle of his thumb.
“Aww, baby.” I help him stand up and he tugs at the seat of his pants.
“I’m leaky.”
I look down. “I don’t really see that. Can you show me?”
He turns one of his legs out and pulls on his pants to show me a big wet moon shape on his inner thigh.
“Ohh. Okay. I’m glad you caught that. Are you ready to go to the bathroom now?”
He nods, still chewing on his thumb.
“Here, let me help you out.” I gently take his hand away and uncurl his fingers. I slip his thumb all the way into his mouth and he looks away, shaking his head and trying to cover his eyes with his other hand. “Ohh, you don’t need to be embarrassed. Let’s go to the bathroom. Come on.”
I help him get his pants all the way off. “How messy are you? Ohh, that’s a lot. I’m surprised the pull-up held up as well as it did.”
“I know I went a lot. I was trying to hold it but then I didn’t want to get up and I thought maybe it would be okay if I went just a little bit…”
“Why did you think that would be okay?”
“I don’t know! Like sometimes when I don’t wipe very good and you aren’t super mad…I thought it could be like that.”
“Can we go change in the bedroom? Are you going to need to pee more?”
He shakes his head. “I’m all done.”
I follow him to the bedroom and he gets his changing mat out from the closet and spreads it on the floor.
“Okay, so you thought you could go just a little bit. What happened next?”
“Ummm…” He kneels on the mat. “I started going a little bit but then I didn’t want to get up and I just wanted to finish in my pants.”
“I see.” I get out his lotion and powder and then turn back to him. “Can you get me something to change you into?”
He covers his face with his hands.
“Come on, you can help me.”
He shuffles over to the closet and comes back with a pull-up.
“No. Do you really think that’s appropriate?”
He half-nods.
“Look down.”
He obliges.
“Look over your shoulder.”
His hand is over his face again and he shakes his head.
“Look over your shoulder,” I repeat. “Do you think another pull-up is the right choice?”
He shakes his head into his hand and kneels down in the closet, putting the pull-up back. But he doesn’t move.
“Come on, bud. This one isn’t that hard. I know you can figure it out.”
