bluejay

i exist merely for shits and giggles everett / JJ he / it / xe @everett0nline on twt

[rutilated-quarz]

my pronouns? oh im a hee/heem. whimper

[bluejays-boys]

why is my WHOLE TIMELINE GHOAPPOSTING. im. gonna go crazy

[hjartasalt]

I'm so tired of the way suspicious meat is always human meat like for once I just want to be surprised. Let it be something else I'm so tired of it being human meat

[hjartasalt]

Look I love horror I'm a big fan of it but guys. It's been overdone. At this point when I reach a point in a story where the meat starts being suspicious I roll my eyes because we all already know it's just some guy. Mystery meat could be so much more why won't we let it be more

Oh my steak is a guy? Yawn. Boring. That's every steak in horror.

Give me meat that just spawns randomly in your fridge. Meat that has no clear origin. Where is it from? We don't know. What kind of meat is it? No clue. It's mystery meat (non human (as far as we're aware of)). That's already a bit scarier if only thanks to not knowing how hygenic it is

Give me horror meat that isn't human bt has it's horror rooted in reality. Give me parasite pork that takes over your brain functions. Give me fucking prion disease at this point I'll take it. I'm so starved for mystery meat where the twist ISN'T that it's human c'mon people we can do better than this

[hjartasalt]

Give me meat that IS genetically human but can't be matched to anyone's DNA!!! Where the fuck is it from?? We don't know!! Scary!!!

[hjartasalt]

Oh people keep disappearing but hey at least the food is really good so that's something right? Womp womp you're eating a guy. Boring. Been there done that. Give me something new

[hjartasalt]

Give me a guy who works in a slaughterhouse who swears on his life he's killed the exact same cow every week for the past 6 months and every time it gets harder to pull the trigger as it looks him in the eyes like it knows him

[roach-works]

i saw some kinda creepypasta that stuck with me for years about a guy who went over to his college friend's dorm room and the guy just took a utility knife, cut a square out of the wall, pulled out a handful of ground hamburger from the bleeding hole, and started frying it on an illegal dormroom hotplate.

the narrator was like 'uh what the fuck, is there meat behind all the walls here?' and his friend just shrugged. he didn't know. he just knew that the wall meat in his dorm was cheaper than the student cafeteria burgers and he wasn't dead yet.

so the narrator went back to his own dorm and wrote a greentext for fourchan. just sitting there staring at his dorm wall. psyching himself up to try it.

[bluejays-boys]

oh i am. in the trenches. i am so obsessed with him

[bluejays-boys]

never fall in love with a man. ever.

[bluejays-boys]

NEVER FALL IN LOVE PERIOD I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE

[aokozaki]

Best part of non-American twitter is that sometimes Trending In [Country] will just be a set of loose words that people from your country happen to be using a lot today.

[meow-moment]

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

this is prime proof that this ENTIRE WEBSITE is autistic because nowhere else would a no tags post that's just an informative list about slang get this much traction.

[captav]

hydrate or diedrate 💧

[bluejays-boys]

oh i am. in the trenches. i am so obsessed with him

[bluejays-boys]

never fall in love with a man. ever.

[rutilated-quarz]

my pronouns? oh im a hee/heem. whimper

[andstuffsketches]

girl who lives in a cave

[bluejays-boys]

oh i am. in the trenches. i am so obsessed with him

[aloofwindbag]

I can’t remember which issue but there’s a robin comic where he tells Tim to get some rest and then wakes him like 2 hours later and I can’t help but think any normal 14 year old would have had a fit.

[heroesriseandfall]

10/10 art, similar vibe to this scene:

Robin Vol. 2 #15 (March 1995)

[bluejays-boys]

gang im way cooler on @glory-in-death i swear

[bluejays-boys]

thinking about turning this into like an aesthetic account rather than shitposting….. id probs have to delete all my existing stuff tho n im too lazy for that

[liarsblade]

A lot of jokes get scrapped because I can't type the phrase "Chantry sex-ed" without laughing really hard and forgetting what I was about to say.

[bluejays-boys]

hey chat so im actually experiencing severe hallucinations and have the innate desire to kill everyone around me. am I haunted by long forgotten spirits or is this an episode

[zmpl]

they would find each other in any universe