pairing: bf!valko x gn!reader
cw: suggestive and sfw headcannons (they're separated), petnames, fluff, teasing and mocking
a/n: gonna make family man valko headcannons next, stay tuned for that... (edit: it's out and I linked it)
family man valko headcannons!
Valko masterlist
ᯓ★ bf!valko who likes to ragebait you, but isn't immune to it himself. if anything, he's kinda easier to annoy at times. it's all in good fun though, and he'd never get mad at you.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who will kiss, suck, lick or bite any sliver of skin that you expose to him. whether it be your neck, shoulders, ears, collarbone, back, arms, fingers, ankles—literally anything and everything. he's starving.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who doesn't go too crazy with nicknames for you. a bit basic, likes using "baby" and "pretty" a lot. he's a bit of a troll at times though, and likes using the most terrible petnames possible just to get a reaction from you.
"hey honeybun—do you know where my phone is?" he sticks his head in through the door of the room you're lounging in. eyeing you eagerly.
you slowly turn to face him, disgust painting your face as you side-eye him. "what did you just call me?"
"honeybun. y'know, 'cause you're sweet like honey and have nice buns—okay I can't do this." he breaks character, laughter bubbling out of him as he leans against the doorframe.
you join, laughing along with him. "never do that again."
ᯓ★ bf!valko who's always leaning on you, has his head resting in your lap, or even lies down on top of you on the couch while watching tv. it doesn't matter how much you protest and complain about how heavy he is, it doesn't stop him. if anything, it just makes him want to do it more.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who has a ridiculously attractive laugh. you thought it would probably be a little silly, but you were wrong. the first time you heard him really laugh out of true amusement, your entire face got red. not to mention the fact that his fangs and dimples show when he's laughing. also has those smile lines that everyone finds hot.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who never lets you carry anything, ever. whenever you two go out shopping for fun or for groceries, he will hold all the bags with both hands, bulging veins nearly popping out of his biceps as he holds onto 5 bags with each hand. but you still have the audacity to tease him.
"why don't you wanna hold my hand? are you angry at me?" you feign offense, pouting as you eye his obviously full hands.
he freezes, turning to the side to glance at you over his shoulder. "you serious?"
you nod, your frown only deepening as you stare up at him.
he shifts the bags in his left hand and barely manages to hold out his pinky finger to you. "c'mon," he points forward with a gesture of his head.
you chuckle, grabbing onto his pinky finger and walking alongside him.
"happy?" he asks with a scoff, but is unable to hide his grin. once you hum in agreement, his eyes return to the path ahead, his smile widening.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who, just like wolves who pick their partners for life and stick by their decision, saved himself for you. never dated, never kissed, never hooked up, never even flirted. he knew that the one meant for him was out there, and that he'd know it was them the moment he'd meet them. and when you ran into each other the first time? yeah, he knew you were the one. his nose and intuition never failed him afterall.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who acts very suave and confident, which he kinda is, but not all the time. it's kind of a cover-up that became half true somewhere along the way (fake it till you make it). sure he's much cooler now than in his teenage years, but he's still the virgin tech nerd who annotated biology textbooks for fun while having national geographic wildlife documentaries playing in the background.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who's a very outdoorsy man. always suggests going on walks, runs, or hikes with you. but he never takes the same path or trail twice. always insists on seeing new things. however, he knows that most people aren't big fans of hiking and stuff, so he never forces you, and is always encouraging when you do decide to. (also super grateful that you try out his hobbies for him)
"how much longer until we get back..." you whine, your arms dangling in front of you as they rest against valko's shoulders.
he readjusts you, tightening his grip on your legs as you melt further against him, threatening to fall off his back. "hey— you don't get to complain when you're being carried." he huffs.
"fine." you roll your eyes. "but you're the one who suggested carrying me around in the first place."
"what was I supposed to do? let you limp the whole way back? how gentlemanly." he chuckles.
feeling his chest vibrate underneath you, and the warmth emanating from him, you can't help but laugh as well. "alright, alright I get it." you press a quick peck to his cheek. "thanks."
ᯓ★ bf!valko who loves lying in bed with you, face smushed between your thighs. unconsciously gnaws and bites at the flesh of your inner thighs like it's a chew toy.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who sleeps with nothing but a pair of boxers on. with his naturally high body temperature, he's probably more comfortable sleeping nearly naked. never really thought much about it, but when you pointed it out the first time you slept together, he kinda got flustered. thankfully though, you reassured him you didn't mind as long as he was comfortable which he was grateful for (more eye candy for you).
ᯓ★ bf!valko who's a mouth breather sometimes, sorry. (canines expel heat and absorb fresh air through their mouths). he tries to stop it, and it's fine most of the time, but sometimes he can't help his instinctive nature and catches himself doing it unwillingly. gets a little embarrassed when you tease him for it. also snores.
ᯓ★ bf!valko whose fangs sometimes poke your lips or get stuck in the flesh while you two make out. it's gotten to the point where you're used to it and don't mind, but he still kinda freaks out everytime.
you're resting atop his lap, your lips moving against his like you needed him to breathe. and he returned that energy tenfold. his excitement caused him to be a little careless however.
you feel a sharp sting on the corner of your bottom lip and wince away from him. your tongue darts out to feel the spot he accidentally poked. there's no blood, but you can feel a little dent.
he eyes you with wide and worried eyes. "fuck, I'm sorry—" he lets out a quiet whine. "are you okay?"
you nod, chuckling at his pout.
his pout turns into a frown as he furrows his eyebrows at you. "I'm worried about you and you're laughing at me?"
that makes your chuckle turn into a full laugh. you lean into him, cupping his face tenderly before peppering kisses all over his face. "can you blame me? you look cute angry."
"... I'm not cute. I'm a grown man." he huffs, trying his best to stay annoyed, but once your lips press against a particularly sensitive spot near his jaw, he melts against you.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who loves seeing you try out new clothes, or pampering yourself. he just likes showing you off, and he loves it even more when you show off for him. probably loves praising you too. "you look so hot." "can't believe that's all mine." "that's the top you weren't sure about? it was made for you." and so on and so forth.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who steals food off your plate, especially stuff like dumplings or fries. will quickly grab the food and eat it in front of you while smirking. oh, and don't hold your sandwich up near him and look away for even a second, because he will lean in and take a bite of it. also the type to take huge bites whenever you offer him small bites of your food.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who puts his hand over your head when you're about to smack your head on something. doesn't even do it to be chivalrous or anything, it's automatic. also does it when it's raining.
── SUGGESTIVE
ᯓ★ bf!valko who would not care about you having body hair. he knows it's the natural state of your body, and likes it for that reason. would be devastated if you shaved your bush.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who's a munch. he likes it because it's one of the places where your scent is the strongest. likes giving more than receiving.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who wants you before you shower. when he texts you he's coming home, he always makes sure to add "don't wash". he loves your natural scent and musk, and doesn't want it to be erased by the artificial scent of body shampoo and soap. that's not to say he's unhygienic or anything, he likes both but has a very clear preference.
ᯓ★ bf!valko who you find yourself laughing with during intimacy. whether it's you mocking him for a strangled noise he let out, or him chuckling at your pleading face, the two of you always find a way to smile through it.
a/n: come back home dada please
if you liked this, you might like my family man valko headcannons!
After years of living in the adulting world, I think I’ve come to a realization: Manners exist to guide you to good conduct even when you’re in a bad mood.
When you’re happy, when you’re feeling generous, when you’re pleased with your gift or your service or your outcome, it’s easy to be nice. It’s easy to tip the waiter well when you’ve had a good day. It’s easy to thank the teller or the clerk when you got what you wanted out of the transaction. It’s easy to smile and chit-chat with strangers on the road when you’re in a good mood.
It’s hard to tip the waiter when you didn’t enjoy your food. It’s hard to thank the clerk for their time when you’ve just been told there’s a problem with their account and they weren’t able to fix it for you. It’s hard to think of something nice to say when your aunt gave you a crappy sweater you neither need nor want. It’s hard to be nice to people when you’ve had a shitty day. It’s HARD.
That’s what manners are for. Scripts and phrases that you learn by rote to say when you can’t think of a single nice or good thing to say from your own volition. Yes, they’re scripted. Yes, the sentiment is empty. But the scripts work in every situation, and the emptiness provides a buffer between your own unhappiness and the rest of society.
Because most of the time, it’s not the waiter’s fault that the food you ordered wasn’t what you expected. It’s not the clerk’s fault that your account is overdrawn. It’s not the fault of the barista or the stranger on the subway that you got fired today or your favorite aunt died. But even when you can’t summon a smile or a cheery word, you can still have manners, because they will serve you the same in sunshine or rain.
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