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@bnork-the-caveman
gork has mammoth riding test tomorrow wish gork luck
gork failed. Instructor said gork didn't look enough when turning and didn't park perfect. Other stuff marked wrong on clay tablet but she not explain it 🤷
it ok gork! took me until almost twenty two winters to pass test.
They call Crag 007
0 cavewomen mated with
0 fires invented
7 diseases contracted from eating undercooked meat
Blurg almost worried for Crag. Crag seriously not invented own style of fire?
Pergok offered to teach Crag how cook meat. Crag say no.
Crag dug him pooping hole, now he gotta poop in it.
Crag not think that how saying goes
No, but it accurate for Crag tummy situation after eating raw meat so much
We've seen baby youtubers, but what about prehistoric youtubers
my buddy who's an early human was showing me his rudimentary stone tools like "these are gonna change everything". bruh 😂😂
hey man :/
Kinda rude of you OP
we're doing our best :(
better have tool and not need, than need tool and not have
Without stone tool, bronze tool and steel tool would never exist
Me need to go to bed so me have energy for big hunt tomorrow but me looooove look at pictures on tumblr dot com
Uh oh me been awake so long fire went out 😬
Next day. Me try to keep eye out for deer but me so sneepy
mmmm bnork also tired as hell. bnork try to stay up very late carving things n bnork fall asleep on log
Crag stay up late last night watching Hundreds of Beavers. Good movie about how small animals evil and humankind need hunt and kill them for sport
Glad to know that nobody sleep at correct time last night. We all fucked if smilodon attack in morning
not true bnork spouse good with club and kill smilodon easy while also looking pretty. bnork safe from smilodon
Me need to go to bed so me have energy for big hunt tomorrow but me looooove look at pictures on tumblr dot com
Uh oh me been awake so long fire went out 😬
Next day. Me try to keep eye out for deer but me so sneepy
mmmm bnork also tired as hell. bnork try to stay up very late carving things n bnork fall asleep on log
I really wanna talk to the people who are like "our ancestors never wore shoes and they are raw meat and they slept on hard surfaces, we must go back to our primal roots" and be like, ok, if our ancestors were so good at living comfortably, then why the fuck did they invent shoes, beds, and preferred cooked meat??
Literally the people you admire hated all the things you admire them for so much that they invented ways to Not do all those things.
People in desert tribe have been so nice. Ask me about where me from. Me tell them temperate rainforest tribe and they say “holy sungod you must be hot” and me say “ya” while feeling like me look like this
Me realizing people in temperate rainforest tribe not this friendly at all… that plus heat making me so sleepy…
DONT FALL ASLEEP BLAGLARTHA THEY GONNA EAT YOU LIVER
Me went into adobe hut and took nap. Me check and me still have liver thank goodness!!!
Me carry large club while walking so they know not to mess with me >:3
me live in mountainous forest. me never been this hot before in me life
Drink lots of water and also shiny white rock to replenish your vitality
have been doing lots. Problem is kids who no want rock water. Kids fall over in heat and lay in creek but no want water. Bnork at end of rope
People in desert tribe have been so nice. Ask me about where me from. Me tell them temperate rainforest tribe and they say “holy sungod you must be hot” and me say “ya” while feeling like me look like this
Me realizing people in temperate rainforest tribe not this friendly at all… that plus heat making me so sleepy…
DONT FALL ASLEEP BLAGLARTHA THEY GONNA EAT YOU LIVER
Me went into adobe hut and took nap. Me check and me still have liver thank goodness!!!
Me carry large club while walking so they know not to mess with me >:3
me live in mountainous forest. me never been this hot before in me life
99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!
FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME
BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND
PANSEXUALS GROW FROM THE CEILING
Happy Pride, cave dwellers 🦇
Bnork want to know where to find such pretty muds for cave walls. all mud Bnork find very soft and brown like normal mud not like entire sun in sky before night and like flowers down by water.
Crag think cannibalism will be next big health fad diet because living human body already contain all the nutrients a living human body needs
nutrients yes but bnork seen people go crazy for no reason after long winter where village have to eat people. happen every time. Bnork not so sure about cannibalism now
Hey so like omen wise how are we doing. Are we doing okay
This go beyond omen. This portent of doom. Ration you berries, make your meat into jerky, start storing water. Save one arrow for yourself. etcetera etcetera
oh no bnork doomed
my buddy who's an early human was showing me his rudimentary stone tools like "these are gonna change everything". bruh 😂😂
hey man :/
Kinda rude of you OP
not polite at all :( bnork disappointed in op
Me would want baby (not birth baby though. That dangerous. Me would steal baby) if village actually would help raise baby but instead village say:
“aw nice baby. That be 30k shiny rocks. Help you raise baby? No. You need to give up identity and all personal time to raise baby. You get 1-3 moon with baby before you go back to gather full time. You can take more moon to be with baby but we will hold grudge against you. Also we lit valley on fire and glacier melting and we we start war with neighboring tribe :) because cavemen with all shiny rocks want more shiny rocks. Your baby have no future. Yeah. We sorry not sorry.”
Also impossible not to traumatize baby. Me accidentally let bad thing happen to baby or me yell at baby because it go to close to cliff and then baby develop anxiety disorder and it would all be me fault and me cant deal with that guilt.
Also me still feel like baby :( me no old enough to have baby!
bnork think blargathas village not so great. bnork elders not help cavewife much but village bring meats until cavewife can hunt again. bnork help if blargatha ever change her mind, and bnork already have kept four babies alive.
crag jr??? are you soft launching a child????
Crag jr been public knowledge for a little while actually
crag soft launch child into tar pit maybe
lcao (laughing crag's ass off)
every time bnork hear of crag Jr, bnork concern for crag Jr grows. Maybe crag not best dad for small child. Maybe
how would Bnork raise Crag Jr?
bnork need to do lot of stepping to keep up with children. especially when children eat mysterious leaf
crag jr??? are you soft launching a child????
Crag jr been public knowledge for a little while actually
crag soft launch child into tar pit maybe
lcao (laughing crag's ass off)
every time bnork hear of crag Jr, bnork concern for crag Jr grows. Maybe crag not best dad for small child. Maybe
Pergok's children die from one or two disease, Crag Jr survive despite having all diseases. Crag making Crag Jr strong be exposing to adversity
bnork lose one child to long winter and that it. Rest of bnork children fine and also large. Bnork still give them adversity through running at lions and going in Deep Waters. Bnork just not attack children like lunatic or poison them with snaketooth blood
the tar pit and the snake poison were accidental okay
that fair. sometimes bnork come home and children bleeding all over cave floor and not tell bnork why. children messy
crag jr??? are you soft launching a child????
Crag jr been public knowledge for a little while actually
crag soft launch child into tar pit maybe
lcao (laughing crag's ass off)
every time bnork hear of crag Jr, bnork concern for crag Jr grows. Maybe crag not best dad for small child. Maybe
Pergok's children die from one or two disease, Crag Jr survive despite having all diseases. Crag making Crag Jr strong be exposing to adversity
bnork lose one child to long winter and that it. Rest of bnork children fine and also large. Bnork still give them adversity through running at lions and going in Deep Waters. Bnork just not attack children like lunatic or poison them with snaketooth blood
