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Today's Document
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@bnork-the-caveman
I really wanna talk to the people who are like "our ancestors never wore shoes and they are raw meat and they slept on hard surfaces, we must go back to our primal roots" and be like, ok, if our ancestors were so good at living comfortably, then why the fuck did they invent shoes, beds, and preferred cooked meat??
Literally the people you admire hated all the things you admire them for so much that they invented ways to Not do all those things.
People in desert tribe have been so nice. Ask me about where me from. Me tell them temperate rainforest tribe and they say “holy sungod you must be hot” and me say “ya” while feeling like me look like this
Me realizing people in temperate rainforest tribe not this friendly at all… that plus heat making me so sleepy…
DONT FALL ASLEEP BLAGLARTHA THEY GONNA EAT YOU LIVER
Me went into adobe hut and took nap. Me check and me still have liver thank goodness!!!
Me carry large club while walking so they know not to mess with me >:3
me live in mountainous forest. me never been this hot before in me life
Drink lots of water and also shiny white rock to replenish your vitality
have been doing lots. Problem is kids who no want rock water. Kids fall over in heat and lay in creek but no want water. Bnork at end of rope
People in desert tribe have been so nice. Ask me about where me from. Me tell them temperate rainforest tribe and they say “holy sungod you must be hot” and me say “ya” while feeling like me look like this
Me realizing people in temperate rainforest tribe not this friendly at all… that plus heat making me so sleepy…
DONT FALL ASLEEP BLAGLARTHA THEY GONNA EAT YOU LIVER
Me went into adobe hut and took nap. Me check and me still have liver thank goodness!!!
Me carry large club while walking so they know not to mess with me >:3
me live in mountainous forest. me never been this hot before in me life
99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!
FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME
BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND
PANSEXUALS GROW FROM THE CEILING
Happy Pride, cave dwellers 🦇
Bnork want to know where to find such pretty muds for cave walls. all mud Bnork find very soft and brown like normal mud not like entire sun in sky before night and like flowers down by water.
Crag think cannibalism will be next big health fad diet because living human body already contain all the nutrients a living human body needs
nutrients yes but bnork seen people go crazy for no reason after long winter where village have to eat people. happen every time. Bnork not so sure about cannibalism now
Hey so like omen wise how are we doing. Are we doing okay
This go beyond omen. This portent of doom. Ration you berries, make your meat into jerky, start storing water. Save one arrow for yourself. etcetera etcetera
oh no bnork doomed
my buddy who's an early human was showing me his rudimentary stone tools like "these are gonna change everything". bruh 😂😂
hey man :/
Kinda rude of you OP
not polite at all :( bnork disappointed in op
Me would want baby (not birth baby though. That dangerous. Me would steal baby) if village actually would help raise baby but instead village say:
“aw nice baby. That be 30k shiny rocks. Help you raise baby? No. You need to give up identity and all personal time to raise baby. You get 1-3 moon with baby before you go back to gather full time. You can take more moon to be with baby but we will hold grudge against you. Also we lit valley on fire and glacier melting and we we start war with neighboring tribe :) because cavemen with all shiny rocks want more shiny rocks. Your baby have no future. Yeah. We sorry not sorry.”
Also impossible not to traumatize baby. Me accidentally let bad thing happen to baby or me yell at baby because it go to close to cliff and then baby develop anxiety disorder and it would all be me fault and me cant deal with that guilt.
Also me still feel like baby :( me no old enough to have baby!
bnork think blargathas village not so great. bnork elders not help cavewife much but village bring meats until cavewife can hunt again. bnork help if blargatha ever change her mind, and bnork already have kept four babies alive.
crag jr??? are you soft launching a child????
Crag jr been public knowledge for a little while actually
crag soft launch child into tar pit maybe
lcao (laughing crag's ass off)
every time bnork hear of crag Jr, bnork concern for crag Jr grows. Maybe crag not best dad for small child. Maybe
how would Bnork raise Crag Jr?
bnork need to do lot of stepping to keep up with children. especially when children eat mysterious leaf
crag jr??? are you soft launching a child????
Crag jr been public knowledge for a little while actually
crag soft launch child into tar pit maybe
lcao (laughing crag's ass off)
every time bnork hear of crag Jr, bnork concern for crag Jr grows. Maybe crag not best dad for small child. Maybe
Pergok's children die from one or two disease, Crag Jr survive despite having all diseases. Crag making Crag Jr strong be exposing to adversity
bnork lose one child to long winter and that it. Rest of bnork children fine and also large. Bnork still give them adversity through running at lions and going in Deep Waters. Bnork just not attack children like lunatic or poison them with snaketooth blood
the tar pit and the snake poison were accidental okay
that fair. sometimes bnork come home and children bleeding all over cave floor and not tell bnork why. children messy
crag jr??? are you soft launching a child????
Crag jr been public knowledge for a little while actually
crag soft launch child into tar pit maybe
lcao (laughing crag's ass off)
every time bnork hear of crag Jr, bnork concern for crag Jr grows. Maybe crag not best dad for small child. Maybe
Pergok's children die from one or two disease, Crag Jr survive despite having all diseases. Crag making Crag Jr strong be exposing to adversity
bnork lose one child to long winter and that it. Rest of bnork children fine and also large. Bnork still give them adversity through running at lions and going in Deep Waters. Bnork just not attack children like lunatic or poison them with snaketooth blood
crag jr??? are you soft launching a child????
Crag jr been public knowledge for a little while actually
crag soft launch child into tar pit maybe
lcao (laughing crag's ass off)
every time bnork hear of crag Jr, bnork concern for crag Jr grows. Maybe crag not best dad for small child. Maybe
how would Bnork raise Crag Jr?
Bnork show crag Jr things and explain. Like path of large beasts in the spring and how to watch for bad water. Bnork not put crag Jr in a tar pit. Or hit with rock. If crag Jr injured, crag Jr cannot run from lions or hunt deer or look for berries.
crag jr??? are you soft launching a child????
Crag jr been public knowledge for a little while actually
crag soft launch child into tar pit maybe
lcao (laughing crag's ass off)
every time bnork hear of crag Jr, bnork concern for crag Jr grows. Maybe crag not best dad for small child. Maybe
Rhodochrosite.
how is rock made of meat!?
bnork think it meat made of rock actually
Hello. Me name Blaglartha Rockmuncher. This name because Blarglartha found rocks that taste good to lick, and after much think, she ate them. Rock taste yummy, make her feel better, and even make meat last longer. Can melt ice too which nice for winter. Also pretty sometime. Look shiny like crystal deep in cave.
Blagartha's tribe thought she crazy. So Blaglartha left to find own cave and hunt meat and gather berry and rock.
Blaglartha here to chat with other cave people and also share love of tasty rocks (and also animals)
Bnork give you two pelt for rocks that are for eating. Maybe cavewife need eating rocks
cavewife not like berries now even though cavewife always like berries. Bnork concerned. Going to bother shaman about it
my puter with my puter disc C:
the people love my puter with my puter disc C:
This post has been blued!
how many of you gimmick blogs do i have to block
bnork think you should appreciate blue poat. is very pretty
