Sunny

evil lesbian girlboy

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This is how I'm coping

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"Don't get the one with gay face. They will tragically sacrifice themselves"

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Hey tumblr… (goes back to my cave)

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WOAHHHHHH WOAHHHH WOAHHHHHH

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Imagine you sit next to me in class and want to ask me something and you look down at my Ipad and see this.

Guess what my star wars otp is ….

[darthmaulscatgirl]

I'd probably want to talk to you about starwars but would be too scared

[clonemmunism]

I wouldnt want to talk to myself about star wars either i start foaming at the mouth

@theamazing-sunny can confirm this

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It fluctuates between delightful info dumping and actual brain rot. There's a whole section in my memory dedicated to star wars lore that has been forcibly downloaded into my brain and I can't delete it. When I close my eyes sometimes I can still hear your voice yapping about codywan

[clonemmunism]

I‘ll betray you like a man.

Slowly losing it this took so long. Anything for them tho. Enjoy

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My lovely pookie made something

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It's my mom's birthday today so I made adrianna lenker cat :P

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Face reveal everybody

@theamazing-sunny thank you for your services

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Just a silly little guy

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Another day another shirtless man

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So dreamy

[myszkaa]

Girl who wants her friends to live long and healthy vs guy who sucks at taking care of himself who wins

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You know the feeling you get when you see your dog slowly starting to grey? Do you think that's how Marcille would feel when all of her friends suddenly start to show signs of aging?

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I think one of favorite parts about frieren beyond journey's end is the contentious theme of praise. It's something that gets scattered throughout the entire series and it's really such a simple thing. Multiple times character mention that when they get into heaven they hope to get praised by their goddess. And it's their primary drive to do anything. Or when (mainly) frieren offers to praise them. The innocent desire to have someone say something nice about them. For someone to acknowledge their efforts. It really is such a simple human desire and it's truly adorable in a way.

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Square - Mitski

Your room was square

I once noticed from there

In your bed, as you slept

And I held my breath

Everything had its own place

And I wondered what space would I take

In the order you kept

The beginning of the song builds this character that the narrator is presumably dating. This guy has a square room, everything in it has a fixed place. That's probably how his life is built as well, clean, organized. He has a place in this world and so does everything that belongs to him. At this point of the song, the narrator seems rather scared in this relationship. Not feeling like they belong until their partner determines their space.

The instruments and vocals are calm, it sounds like the narrator is simply talking to their partner.

I tried to eat like your girlfriend

Just tea in the night, I'd end up

Too hungry to sleep

So lying awake

I would follow the aching inside

I would find

It's for you won't be mine

The narrator doesn't eat to fit a mold that was set by the guy's previous relationships. They do whatever they think will make them more desirable to the guy, not caring if it leaves them awake at night. It's also notable that the narrator is playing a role because they think that this dude will like that role more than their genuine self. I also feel like the narrator is hungry for more, they want this dude to like them so bad, they want that guy's affection, attention, approval so bad. They just long to have a place in this guy's world. They are so hungry for his love that they are willing to water themselves down for him.

The instruments start to slowly intensify

I tried my hardest, for I'd never learned

God's very simple and love shouldn't burn

And I would've offered you all that you yearned for

But I was still waiting for something to earn

The first time this chorus plays, it sounds very sad, the narrator is still yearning for this guy's love. They tried SO hard to make this relationship work but they just couldn't learn how to properly play their part. And they know that this is not how it should be, love isn't meant to be confusing, it doesn't burn. The narrator bent over backwards to give their partner all they could but got nothing in return.

The vocals are emotional but they aren't mad, it's more of a disappointment in oneself, like they could have done more. And I think you can really feel the desperation.

What is that quiet of snow in the night?

The dark rings with white noise as you stand and drown

Maybe it's all of these snowflakes

Screaming a choir of mute

As they brace for the ground

This first half is the narrator talking about their relationship in the past. Now they are talking about their last date in the presence. It's all so vividly described. A cold winter night, it's snowing and the stars are shining. Even though all of this sounds like they are talking to him, I don't actually think that is what's happening. The snowflakes are falling - the narrator is burning up in this relationship. Screaming a choir of mute - the narrator would rather play the role, staying quiet than be vulnerable with him. Brace for the ground - the narrator knew this relationship was doomed for a long time now, just a matter of time till they finally reach the end.

This part gets a lot more intense, you can hear the frustration especially on the snowflake part when you can just hear the narrator just realizing how much they were actually hurting in their relationship.

Well, that's my ride

Hope you had a good night

You know, you made me happy

Here, shake my hand

You make such a good man

Never once did you know me

But then quickly before you think that's when the narrator cracks, actually breaking their role they get interrupted by their taxi. The music settles back down and the narrator just keeps going like before. It was a good night, you were a good boyfriend, let's shake hands. Calm and sweet and then the last line just so bitter. The narrator wasted so much energy into this relationship and he never even got to know them. They haven't been once vulnerable with this dude. From the beginning, it was just play pretend.

I tried my hardest, for how do you learn

God's very simple and love doesn't burn

And maybe you'd offered me all that I yearned for

But I was still waiting for something to earn

Silly me, waiting

The second time the chorus starts playing it's so much more frustrated. They are mad at themselves for going along with this fake relationship for so long and for him to have never given something back. The first time it was "love shouldn't burn" knowing this is not right but still putting up with it and this time the like being "love doesn't burn" being certain that this is wrong. And god maybe he actually did give them everything they yearned for but they just couldn't belong in this relationship. They are left feeling empty. Yet they are still waiting for something to get out of this, calling themselves silly for still yearning.

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Poem I wrote in January

I loved u and i still do, even tho we haven't had a real conversation in months. Not necessarily in a romantic way but i wouldn't know about things like that even if it was. But I do know that I love you unconditionally.

I know all your flaws and i was joyful at the thought of being able to experience them for the rest of my life.

And even tho we haven't spoken in months i am convinced that no matter how long we will not speak, we will always bounce back to each other.

The same way that summer always comes every year no matter how cold the winter was. I love you the same way the moon loves the ocean.

Doesn't matter how long the day was, you will kiss me when i rise and set. And you're like the sun that i turn my head to. And you're the moon and stars that are able to make the ugly field in front of my house so green that i can see your eyes in it.

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It's my moms birthday today

And I'm smoking out of my room now

When the sun rises and my phone tries to desperately wake me up I will go out to the local bakery and get her some cake. I don't know if she would eeven appreciate it, it's not self baked but I can't bake. But now I'm sitting on my window looking at the moon. It's almost a full moon, so ironic. She always hated those, she could never sleep because it was too bright. I don't think she minds now though, her bedroom is turned away from it but it shines right into mine. My room is full of light. After school I will go to the flower shop and get her a nice pot flower, I can't stand bouquets standing in our kitchen, watching them slowly wither away. I think I will get her some chocolates. Not the sweet ones wrapped in pink, the bitter ones. She did say she was trying to lose weight. When my cigarette burns out and the sun rises I will get her cake, I will ask the lady which one has the least sugar. I will try to sneak into her bedroom as quietly as possible and put a cake on her night stand, with a carefully placed candle. She will probably wake up anyway, quiet was never my strength. When my cigarette goes out and the sun rises I hope to wish my mom a happy birthday.

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Writing prompt

A chilly winter night. It was only a mere 10 minute walk to my flat but I was so buzzed, everytime I took a step forward I could feel the life get drain out of me. I sat down and tried to roll a cigarette even though my stiffen hand made it hard. I glanced across the street where I could vaguely figure out the shape of some old sofa. People frown upon used things but I think they are just a gift that never stops giving. With my new mission i stood up and lit my cigarette then proceeded to try not fall on my face as I walked across the street. It was so stupidity cold that I couldn't tell if it was cigarette smoke or just my warm breath in the wind. I pulled away the thin Blanket that protected the sofa. It was a small patchwork sofa and admittedly gorgeous ,but there was something on it. Something? Someone! I gasped in surprise. A tall man with long white hair was curled up on it. The man quickly stood up, he looked down in a way I couldn't see his face. I live in a big city, I am no alien to the homeless and I give what I can but sometimes the they can get a litte aggressive. I apologized in hopes I could dodge further trouble. It was obviously he was tall when he was laying down but now that he towerd over me, it was scary.

A light breeze hit us. The wind pushed his hair out of his face. It might sound stupid but when I got to see the most beautiful clear blue eyes, I don't think I was ever this terrified. They were just so many, he had to have at least 10 all over his face. And they were all looking at me directly. I was in shock and speechless and intoxicated. I considered that someone might have spiked my drink and now I'm just hallucinating. But the massive white wings that were spreading out behind it looked terrifyingly real, I walked back trying to perhaps try to run away but it only came closer. Suddenly I stumbled over my own legs and fell on my own back. The creature just kept walking closer , I tried to crawl backwards but then I felt the house wall against my back. I cried out in a panic when I realized I was trapped, The creature dropped theatrically to it's knees in front of me, it's many eyes started to close and seal shut. The only eyes that stayed on its face were the two that mirrored my own. It almost looked human. Long white lashes framing it's eyes and it's skin pale and smooth. it looked like it was made out of glass or maybe like a porcelain doll. The creature in front of me didn't look like it was going to harm me, it seemed just as panicked as I was, it's big eyes looked at first so glossy and unreal until heavy tears started to roll down it's face.

At this point I sobered up. I collected some courage and opened my mouth but before I could say anything the creature in front of me also got the same idea. Oh well I think that's what it was trying to do. It opened its mouth but there didn't come any words out of it. It sounded like other language but distorted and played backwords. It seemed more like a cry. A very loud one that echoed. It was such a weird noise and when I covered my ears I could still hear it. "Please that hurts!" I yelped. The creature got quiet.