B0n3b0y

he/him|TW 3D/$H

[bon3b0y]

INTRO POST!

(v.2 lol)

heyy there! you can call me Bone! :)

im bi and trans (ftm)

im chronically ill, i have POTS, FND, and most likely hEDS but its so hard to get a diagnosis

idk what my interests or hobbies are im just a shell of a human atp

TW under the cut!! BLOCK DONT REPORT PLS (i'll just make a new account and ill still have these issues, your not saving anyone, just taking away their place to vent and talk openly when you report accounts like this)

idk what i am at this point, i have some kind of 3D used to be more like an@, but now my main issue is b1nging (fml), im trying to loose we1ght for the summer so i dont feel dysphoric all the time and want to km$

im also 99% sure i have bipolar disorder, not self diagnosing or anything though, ive done the questionnaires with my therapist and she basically says the only reason shes not diagnosing me with bipolar is cause im a minor, its super anoyying because she basically admitted i have it, but i cant get any help for it so im just fucked and its ruining my life

sw: 176lbs | lw: 142lbs | cw: 158.5lbs | ugw: 110lbs

i gained a lot of we1ght since my illnesses got worse, im trying to get to atleast 125 by summer time

i also $H, i started when i was 12 and have only been clean for about a month since, i was trying to get clean for awhile but now i honestly dont even get why i shouldnt do it so im not trying to get clean anymore

[bon3b0y]

plan to f4st all day and OMAD dinner tomorrow after i go to the gym. Idk if i should do weights cause im worried about l00sing too much muscle? Im still conflicted on the sk1nny vs buff debate lol

[bon3b0y]

im back, gonna try to post more regularly to keep myself accountable.. 2025 was AWFUL ga1ned SO much we1ght do to "rec0very" that turned into a borderline b1nge 3d. Back on my 4n4 grind for 2026 cause i refuse to be f4t and ugly and lowk just unhealthy. First bit of the year hasnt been great so far but this will be my year trust.

[maggots-in-a-microwave]

No hope no friends no life no anything they should allow me to take hard drugs

[nunueseri]

I can't explain how disgusting I feel when I actually eat, I regret the first bite immediately, but I can't stop.

[bpderanged]

Passive suicidal ideation is like no I won't attempt but if I got hit by a car and died that'd be nice

[bon3b0y]

gonna charge my watch to track my steps again. im pretty active throughout the day and when i try to 34t like 800-1200 c4ls i get extremely shaky and feel like im gonna pass out so i feel like im probably burning a good amount through the day. i think im gonna up my c4ls to 1400 ish for tech week cause i literally will not survive otherwise lol. also i burn like 200 c4ls from running around during rehersal anyway so i think its fine.

[bon3b0y]

oh. my. god. i need to fucking stop b1nging. last time i was at the psychiatrist they we1ghed me and i was the highest we1ght ive ever been and im going again this week and i need to be atleast 5 lbs less i dont care if its just water i need it gone. chugging water tn

[bpderanged]

January

*dissociates*

October

[bon3b0y]

I start today. Not Tomorrow, not on Monday. Today. And if I fuck up then I just gotta keep going. I keep having the “well I fucked up so might as well eat whatever I want” mentality and it’s made me g41n 30 p0unds since this time last year. IT NEEDS TO FUCKING STOPP

[bon3b0y]

I’m so mad I was doing good today for the first time in forever and ofc I had a horrible blood sugar crash cause of my meds (like I mean almost blacking out and shaking so fucking much) so I had to 34t and I just had pickles and goldfish but that didn’t help so I ate a ton of other stuff T-T

Still at around 1200 c4ls for today so I guess im okay with that compared to what I’ve been having recently but my goal was 800 :/

[bon3b0y]

I have one month…

[holl0w-c0rpse]

i‘m a fat fucking loser who can’t even starve right

[planetxems]

[h4s3lan]

it's never recovery, just a break

[bon3b0y]

Yall ever unlock repressed trauma randomly? Like bro tell me why I was trying to sleep and my blanket wrapped around my neck a bit and I suddenly remembered that MY EX TRIED TO CHOKE ME TO D34TH??? I mean it was like 7th grade so idk but he choked me until I couldn’t see anymore while shouting d34th threats so…

Anyway new lore unlocked 😝

[throaway32]

i'm not thin enough to fall in love