Fairyland all around us @bonfireofthevanities - Tumblr Blog

Overgrown

Some thoughts and feelings have overgrown quite a bit in my head. It gets a little suffocating sometimes. While I love them dearly, I think they might benefit from a little trim every once in a while.

lilblueorchid

Oh this piece made it to tumblr radar apparently? Thank you!!!

lightninggrave

i really fuck with it when my oomfs start their posts in media res. they'll open it with a phrase like "it's just funny because..." and then i look at their blog to see what's funny and. nothing.

aokozaki

It's like how Beowulf opens with a call to attention.

lightninggrave

posting is exactly like beowulf

yourlocaladhder

"It's ok to disappoint people." has got to be MOST powerful, life changing advice I have ever heard.

stormlightarchivist

If your gut reaction to this is "no it's not" I swear, I promise, that disappointing people, particularly disappointing people who have unrealistic, outdated, manipulative, or just plain wrong expectations of you, or versions of you in their head, is better than continually disappointing yourself. Signed, an inveterate people pleaser who FINALLY realized this and made my life almost immediately more authentic and fulfilling by acting upon it.

spoonbendersanonymous

"Single people are on average less healthy, less financially stable, and overall less satisfied with life than partnered and married people are. This must mean that monogamous relationships and marriage are the solution to society's problems"

Huh, it's almost like society, both socially and financially, is set up to specifically benefit people who have monogamous relationships and get married and punish people who don't partner or get married. It's almost like there are financial benefits that exist specifically to incentivize people to get married and have kids and be a nuclear family. It's almost like it was very culturally normal until very very very recently to just not have any deeper platonic relationships after you get married, meaning that single people past a certain age just get left behind and get treated as spinsters or loser bachelors. It's like life just is not designed for single people to be able to easily participate and survive while still being single. Huh, very weird. I'm sure marriage will fix this.

spoonbendersanonymous

Hey, to everyone in the replies talking about how polycules and living with your friends are the answer to this problem, I see your points but also my point is you shouldn't *have to* live with *anyone* in order to survive. Living in big groups with your friends and in polycules is awesome and should be more normalized and easily attainable, but also it should never be required. People should make enough money by themselves to pay rent or buy a house. People should have wider community support systems that let them thrive even if they don't have a partner or a group to live with. We shouldn't be financially incentivizing a very particular way of living. People are going to continue to be left behind if we punish living by yourself.