The Wonderful Thing About Tiggers @bottomsmadeofspring - Tumblr Blog

Two coworkers, a man and a woman, are standing in the break room talking about what they’re gonna do that evening. The man says he’s really excited for shark week on tv. "Oh man,” says the woman, “I love shark week but my family gets way too into it. My parents’ siblings all come over to watch it, it’s like a bizarre family reunion which is only made more confusing by the fact that both of my parents have a sister named Audra. Then my dads cousin Florence comes around but always unannounced… It gets so chaotic.” The man responds “My family gets together during shark week too, and we always have a lot of fun!” "Well,” replies the woman, “that’s because your Shark Week doesn’t consist of Aunt Flo and a double Aunt Audra.”

#puns #shark week #original joke #menstruation #yourewelcome

weloveshortvideos

tkyle

tastefullyoffensive

“Hello, Clarice.” (via shodrane)

theverge

Phone-friendly movie theaters for millennials are coming

AMC Entertainment’s new CEO Adam Aron wants to appeal to more to millennials by letting them use their phones in theaters.

“When you tell a 22-year-old to turn off the phone, don’t ruin the movie, they hear ‘please cut off your left arm above the elbow,’” Aron tells Variety. “You can’t tell a 22-year-old to turn off their cellphone. That’s not how they live their life.” Aron believes that AMC needs “to reshape our product in some concrete ways so that millennials go to movie theaters with the same degree of intensity as baby boomers went to movie theaters throughout their lives.”

The CEO is aware that his company is “going to have to figure out a way to do it that doesn’t disturb today’s audiences.” When asked whether there might be certain sections that allow texting, Aron replies “That’s one possibility. What may be more likely is we take specific auditoriums and make them more texting-friendly.”

outsidebutnotoutside

do old ppl honestly think phones are stapled to our hands and we can’t control ourselves for longer than an hour and a half

downwitharistotle

i hate every literal thing about this right down to the condescending ceo

swevani-deactivated20170107

9 times outta 10 when im at a movie theater and the movie is being disrupted it’s either because a 60 year old won’t shut up or a toddler won’t stop screaming

9 times outta 10 22 year olds are the one shushing people or tellin them to shut the fuck up

ncc-1337-deactivated20170924

NO ONE WANTS TO USE THEIR PHONE IN THE THEATER

adhdalistair

As someone who works in a movie theater, this is bullshit. No millenials are using their phones. In fact, the few complaints I’ve gotten from customers about electronic usage were directed at people 60 and up.

ashenprincx

What the actual fuck how detached are these rich assholes from reality

orzesc

cannon-fannon

THIS SPEAKS TO ME ON A MOLECULAR LEVEL RIGHT NOW.

tjspider

You are witnessing a broken human being

I never said you could not hurt me. I said you could not break me. I am not broken any more now than I was the day you appeared, almost like magic, in my isolated awareness; the cold did not bother you, for you had your own fire to burn. Ice, by nature, forms broken and crooked, created out of something that once ran wild with abandon and is now frozen, hard and unmoving in the harsh environment that sired it. This environment is not seen by fire; fire has no care for what surrounds it or for what it may engulf, it sees only what needs igniting and surges forward. "Emotional jumpstart", is what you told me; I am not an engine and moreover no engine of yours to tinker with until you perceive improvement. There is no improvement because I am not broken; I am ice, created inherently harsh and flawed out of the consequences from trusting like water. This innate being I am, created as is with purpose, is by definition not broken; I was not intended to be one way and through accident wound up another, for this implies someone once cared enough to shape me with good intentions. No one has aspirations for water, and thus water cannot break; it can only become ice, hardened and stronger and unable to be destroyed because when faced with fire it only again becomes water. Water can freeze, melt, and refreeze in an endless cycle but it will never break. I will never break because I am ice. But here, Fire, is the truth of nature: I may not be broken, but I am hurt. I am hurt, because I was not ready to turn back into water.

There's a Saying About a Shark J.D.G.

#personal #original poetry #here just take these feelings #i don't want them