Aaron Cross

[spnsoulsarchive]

“Knowing someone isn’t coming back doesn’t mean you ever stop waiting.”

— Toby Barlow   (via drapetomania)

[musingsofmyhexrt]

My biggest fear

                        is that eventually

                                                  y o u  will see  m e

                                                                                   the way  I  see  m y s e l f 

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

Aaron laughed softly as she said she felt like a giddy teenager. Their playful banter sent his heart fluttering. He had missed out on this part of growing up. Sometimes, despite all his developments, skills, and abilities - he was transported back to being a young man trying to figure things out for the first time. This was certainly one of those times. He’d gotten some experience with blending in and making things seem normal. He understood the concept of flirting and dating. But experience? He’d done a lot of things in his life but this was one area he was sorely lacking in real world experience. 

“Really, really, likes you back,” he clarified with a coy smile. Aaron deeply enjoyed having that kind of effect on her. It only seemed fair given how the smallest of affections from her seemed to elicit a similar response in him too. “I do hope I can put together a better date than some of my high school competition though,” he sighed and shook his head in mock concern. 

“I can’t imagine that the high school version of you had much trouble getting your crush to like you back though,” he teased her trying to imagine what she might’ve been like back then. “Or maybe more trouble finding someone deserving of your time?” Aaron ventured with a slight raise of his eyebrows in a question, “something gave me the impression you were more study focused than boy crazy. Have I been mislead?” Aaron teased her with a grin.  

Aaron listened quietly as she talked about the trust she had shown in him since she’d gotten sick. He had found himself quietly hesitant to accept some of the change in her at face value. Not because of her but his own history. The last thing he wanted was for her to open herself up more than she’d intended because of her illness. Or because of her reliance on him. It felt like an easy way to end up in the same situation he had with Marta. Someone getting caught up in the intensity and vulnerability of survival only to realize it had been manufactured by the moment and not genuine emotion. 

He pushed away those thoughts and focused on what she was saying to him. Aaron had to choose to believe that it was different even as the fear lingered in the back of his mind. He wanted to believe Corinne and what she was saying. It made him feel warm and happy in a way he didn’t remember feeling before. She felt safe with him. That was no small feat given the lives they both lived. For her to be able to relax and sleep while she was sick and vulnerable, and she felt safe with him. He held onto those words tightly. 

“Thank you for allowing me to get that close,” his voice was soft, almost reverent for what she’d just admitted to him. Aaron couldn’t find the words to express how treasured that trust was to him or how much he intended to protect that trust with everything he had. Even though they were connected by the gentle touch on his arm and his hand on hers, he wanted to draw her closer. That realization was not missed by him. “You’ve been way past my defenses for a long time.” 

Aaron smiled when Corinne agreed to try to work on their mutual tendency for overthinking and hesitation. “Of course. I’ll be doing my best,” he gave her hand a gentle squeeze. He knew that both of them were likely to fail but he hoped that at least giving voice to the hope they could both try might encourage them. When he felt himself overthinking, he’d try to remember the way the moment felt with her as they both promised to try. He knew he had to trust the grace he entrusted Corinne would give him if he was to make a mistake. 

“Of course it extends beyond your illness,” he smiled at her, enjoying the shy look she gave him as she ventured the idea. “I insist, actually,” he grinned. “I’m looking forward to both of those things.” 

“No, you wouldn’t plan to push it at all,” he teased her playfully. While they had joked about her taking things too far, he was relatively confident that she wouldn’t. It was clear how much the idea of going to the hospital had scared her and he knew she wouldn’t want to be in that position again. “They are trying to get something more long term for you this afternoon. Given how fast you seem to be bouncing back you probably won’t need it for much longer anyways,” he ventured hopefully. The supplies had been for an emergency situation where Corinne wasn’t exactly in a state to take medications and fluids of her own volition. 

“Alright,” he said as he gently grasped her hand and brought it up to kiss the back of her hand. There he was, trying that pause in overthinking. “Let’s see if you can teach your health care assistant a few new tricks,” he offered with a smile as he reluctantly pushed himself off the bed to go rifle through the supplies Joe had brought them. 

He carried his food container out to the kitchen and washed his hands before returning with one of the bags of supplies. Aaron was fairly certain from his research what he might need but he was equally keen to let Corinne teach him too. It was a much nicer alternative to when he’d been studying alone worrying about her condition. 

“Where do we start?” He asked as he spread a few items beside her on the bed. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aaron’s quip about liking her back drew that familiar rise of heat in her skin, which was just as quickly showing up on her cheeks. “Well, as you can see that is giving me even more butterflies.” She said, just flat out admitting to the evidence on her face. Though she smiled at him at the same time. “At the risk of sounding corny, I’m happy to do anything as long as it’s with you.” She said softly. Partly to diffuse the colors on her cheeks and the emotions along with them. Even though she knew he was teasing, she wanted to relay again out loud her feelings about the idea of going on a date.

“You have not been mislead.” She teased back. “I had a few typical high school boyfriends, meaning they didn’t last long beyond the school year.” Nothing of importance to her years later at any rate.

There was something so sweet, almost poignant in the way he thanked her for letting him get that close. The words, along with quiet way he had of speaking to her just touched a place deep inside. She needed to hear it in a way she hadn’t realized until he said it. “There’s no one else in the world I’d want to be or even allow that close to me.” She replied in an equally tender tone. Not only had it seemed he’d recognized it for what it was, she wanted to acknowledge it in kind.

You’ve been way past my defenses for a long time

What he’d said next though nearly took her breath away. She understood the weight and rarity of what his words meant. “I don’t take that lightly.” She said softly, as if it was a fragile object she’d protect from breaking. “I don’t know when it happened, that you became so important to me. It feels as if it was always true, so I can’t quite define the point where my feelings shifted.” The admission held a bit of wonder mixed in.

Aaron confirming his words brought with it a flood of memories at what had happened over the last few days. The now clear in hindsight purposeful flirting between the two of them. Obviously begun well before, but now affirmed. Those thoughts, combined with the way he looked at her and the gentle squeeze of her hand brought another faint blush to her cheeks. The feelings right there just beneath the surface were now all on display. And just like before, she could see that Aaron seemed to enjoy the visible evidence in front of him. Not that she would, but there was no way to deny it. “No need to insist, I’m happy to know it’s mutual on both sides.” Corinne couldn’t imagine how she wouldn’t crave that closeness now that she’d experienced the feelings that accompanied it.

When Aaron mentioned that Annie and Joe were trying to get her more medicine already, her smile widened. Not that she would have complained about continuing the intravenous medication, because it was keeping her out of the hospital. She wouldn’t have asked them to do more, though she shouldn’t have been surprised to learn they were trying to get something else. She had to stop herself from then saying she wouldn’t need the line capped so they could keep administering the meds that way. It made her feel like she was pushing too fast only after just promising not to do so. Instead she smiled at his gentle teasing. “No, I won’t. Promise.” It was an easy promise given all he’d done for her and their newly admitted closeness.

Though obvious far longer than either was admitting, she was happy the result of her illness seemed to influence those confessions to happen sooner.

She couldn’t help the smile that crossed her features as he placed a tender kiss to her hand. Along with it was another round of butterflies taking flight deep within. She wanted to kiss him, but knew it wasn’t a good idea while she was laying in a bed with an intravenous line supplying medicine because she allowed herself to get that sick. Instead she nodded at his words about helping her unhook from the line temporarily. It would come out soon enough and she would be well once more.

Corine shot him a grateful smile when he returned with more supplies. She sat up a little, so she could see what he brought and help keep her arm still enough. “I didn’t ask if you’d already done this yourself, but it looks like you have everything you need.” She said looking over what he’d brought. “Those caps he got are the disinfecting kind. So you’re all set. Basically you’re going to flush the line as you did to set it up or when you’ve removed your own in the past. Only instead of pulling the cannula out, you’ll clamp it off to create a saline lock, then cap it.” She smiled at him. While she could still talk him through the process, she had a feeling he might not need her help.

[bournelegacy]

“That’s only fair considering how often you do the same to me,” he smiled. He might've been hesitant to admit that to her so boldly if the reciprocation wasn’t so clear on her features. Undeniably, Aaron appreciated the effect that his words had on Corinne. The blush that rose up on her cheeks was deeply endearing to him. It made him want to find any number of things to draw that out of her even more. After years of enjoying their little snippets of time together uncertain about how she might’ve felt about him, there was something enthralling about knowing he did have that effect on her now. 

He laughed softly and shook his head. “It doesn’t sound corny, I feel the same,” he admitted with a smile. Aaron found it easier and easier to keep his own confessions flowing the more she opened up. The last thing he wanted was for her to question if the feelings were requited. “Happy doing anything makes it sound like it should be easy to plan a date then,” he teased her, “but that leaves open a lot of endless possibilities for me to narrow down,” he grinned at her. There were no less than a dozen potential ideas already rumbling around in his mind. Not that he’d ever thought about taking her on a date before and what he would do. Of course not. “I’m sure I can come up with something.” 

Aaron smiled warmly as she assured him that she wouldn’t have wanted to get closer to anyone else. The way she discussed her own feelings about him made his heart flutter. “I think it was always true for me even if I didn’t see it right away,” he admitted softly. “I can fake being relaxed and talking to just about anyone but I never had to with you. It was always real. You didn’t get that other version of me. I was careful and cautious but it was still always me,” he reflected. “And it felt like it only got better since I walked into your cafe,” he gave her a smile. 

He managed to temporarily put aside all the warm, contented swirl of emotions that had bubbled up during their conversation. Aaron wasn’t ready to shelve them completely for the day but his mind switched gears to focus on completing the request she had wanted. 

“It’s not something I’ve had to do for myself,” Aaron admitted, “usually I only did this kind of thing because it was needed at the time and not long term,” he reflected softly. He listened carefully as she explained what he needed to do. It made him happy that she was well enough to be able to instruct him. While he had managed to make do with the clinical instructions and research, he much preferred to get the instructions from her own voice. 

Aaron refocused on the task and carefully worked through each step. There was no rush or hurry to complete it so he took his time and gave Corinne every opportunity to correct him if he misstepped. When it was done, the work mode dropped away and he smiled at her again. He gave her arm a light squeeze below where he’d been working. Another quick touch to check in that had become so normal to him but now seemed to hold new meaning. It was surprising to even him how quickly she allowed him to change gears. 

“You’re free, or free-er anyways,” he announced with a smile, “how’s it feel?” Aaron knew there was some risk in giving her free rein but he had to trust she would take it easy. Or easy-ish, anyways. He certainly had no plans to go anywhere so he took comfort in the fact he’d at least be able to keep an eye on her if she did decide to try to be more mobile. 

Aaron would check in with Joe soon and see if they could relieve Corinne completely of the attachments soon. Admittedly, he would’ve preferred to keep her hooked up to fluids and easy access to medications for her own good but he understood her desire to have a little freedom. It was not a welcomed kind of change to her usual freedom of movement. 

He collected the remnants of everything he’d used and set them on the bedside table to be dealt with later. He moved aside the bag and eased himself down on the edge of the bed beside her. “You mentioned that you’d like to take a shower or potentially do something with your hair,” he recalled, “how are you feeling? Would you like to give anything a try now that you don’t have to worry about being tangled.”

[deer-and-pine]

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

“Then I will do my best to overcorrect,” he joked back with her. It seemed like a delicate dance they’d worked out between themselves. They both understood the limitations but yet did their best to work their way to sway around them whilst not having to acknowledge them at every turn. Aaron deeply appreciated the way she did that for him. “I hope you know what that means though?” A hint of amusement lingered on his lips as he continued, “you’re going to be tormented by a lot of useless trivia and movie references.” 

Aaron spent a remarkable amount of time traveling coupled with preparing for missions in lonely hotel rooms. Sometimes those hours beyond the training and study were filled with late night reruns of shows he’d never seen in languages he had newly learned or living vicariously through others people watching in cafes around the world. He was a man with a lot of free time and yet very little life experience beyond the scope of his role with Outcome. 

He quieted momentarily as she acknowledged him. Aaron found himself enjoying the way his name sounded when she said it. He was grateful she’d asked for it and he’d decided to give it to her and not some other alias. He could’ve just been Kenny to her forever but something had made him want her to know who he was now too. Dangerous, but undeniable. 

“Interesting is one word for it,” he considered with a smile. There had definitely been many challenging moments as he tried to balance the demands of his new life in Outcome and also trying to enjoy whatever moments of life he could carve out for himself. “You make it easy to feel comfortable,” he added softly, “and I have to say it’s a lot more fun trying all this out with someone else. Especially someone who is so knowledgeable on the topic,” Aaron gestured a little to the chocolates. But it was so much more than just that. It felt like he was coming on too strong if he continued to pay her endless compliments, no matter how genuine they were or how much he wanted to. 

A slight smile tugged at the corners of his lips as she paused to consider dinner. Something about the way she referred to her rush to get to him on time made his stomach do a little flip. The little flutter in his heart only continued with the way she looked at him. He did his best to try to recover, furrowing his brow slightly in mock confusion. “Why? What happened today that would’ve had you distracted?” It was only a few beats before the smile spread across his lips. 

Admittedly, he had been focused on the location being safe and then the wine and chocolate and making sure he looked presentable for her. Dinner had only vaguely crossed his mind and been discounted temporarily given the uncertainty of how things could’ve gone. 

“Wouldn’t want you to hit the wall on the sweets. I can’t be the one responsible for ruining chocolate and sweets for you. That’s later for your chocolate shop,” he teased her. 

“I’ll have just about anything,” he offered but didn’t want to leave her with all the decisions. “How does pizza sound? I do have a favor to ask though,” he gave an almost sheepish smile. Aaron patted his pockets as if he was missing something, “I didn’t bring my phone. If you wouldn’t mind ordering?” Aaron didn’t need one more tracking device in his life. He wasn’t sure how closely he was observed given he’d just gone for a medical but it wasn’t an additional risk he wanted to take. There were enough risks in the mix already. He did, however, bring his wallet and fully intended to pay for whatever dinner choice they made. 

In another life he would’ve suggested they go for a walk or a drive to go get something themselves. But he was cautious of being out in public together. It felt entirely too close to people who might recognize either of them. Aaron knew it was likely paranoia beyond what was reasonable but the risk was too high to take the chance. 

“If you’ve got something else you’d like more or know somewhere that delivers nearby. I’m open to anything you’d like.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I am here for all the useless trivia and movie references.” Sarah quipped in return. “I’ll take that kind of torment all day long.” She added, with a smile. She found herself once more studying his features. As they’d spent the time together, she’d seen a few expressions or gestures that reminded her of Kenny. It was more a sense of something familiar because as she’d sat with him it was even more clear that he moved in an entirely different way. Everything seemed sharper, more concise and purposeful. She was though also especially interested to hear him talk about what he saw as useless trivia. Suddenly she was keen to learn what he found interesting.

It wasn’t just that, she was also drawn in by his voice. The quiet way he spoke. Wrapped into it was measured quality, a softness in the tone and tenor. She was finding it as addictive as the substance of what they talked about. While it was vaguely familiar, it had been some time since she’d seen him or talked to him. It was different in a way that she couldn’t just dismiss as he’d been injured and in some distress at times. That didn’t quite suffice to explain it.

She let out a soft laugh when he gestured to the chocolates after calling her knowledgeable. “Well, talk about useless trivia, that would definitely qualify. Especially since it comes from loving them and the somewhat rarity of getting to enjoy them.” She joked. “I’m happy you feel comfortable. Trust me, it’s the company. It feels like it’s easy, and maybe that’s in part because we haven’t exactly just met so maybe it’s the familiar part of it that has made it seem comfortable for us.” It definitely wasn’t so easy with everyone, she wasn’t trying to make an effort, it felt like it just came naturally. Though she was at a loss as to how to explain it, especially given the rather unusual situation. It was perhaps too easy to dismiss it in that way, something she wouldn’t consider in depth until another time.

Aaron’s way of making a little joke about their meeting earlier in the day drew her smile up wider. “Oh, I don’t know.” She played along. “Working in a hospital is just full of the unexpected event so it could have been anything.” Sarah added a shrug as she laughed. “No idea what it was.” Her lips twitched, threatening to break into a smile as she tried to keep a straight face.

She broke into a laugh when he brought up again the idea her having a chocolate shop. “I suppose that’s reasonable.” She answered, still laughing a little. “I wonder if people who open them love it or really don’t eat sweets.” She said". “I suppose it would be funny if you asked for a recommendation and the owner said, ‘oh I never touch the stuff, can’t stand sweets.’”

“Pizza sounds great.” She replied when he asked. “Of course, I’m happy to make the call.” Sarah answered. “What do you like on your pizza?” She asked. “I’m usually game for just about anything, as in everything or just a few toppings.” She said, now curious about Aaron’s preferences. “I’m happy with just about anything, pizza delivery is probably fastest though.”

She thought for a moment, then stood up from the couch. “I think my friend might have a drawer with some menus stashed.” She said as she moved to cross the room. “Bingo, I do believe I’ve found the stash.” She called over. Sarah came back to the couch, handing Aaron a menu from a local shop. “Here, I have heard this place is good, though I’ve never been there.They seem to have a good number of options. And this saves me the trouble of looking up a number.” She said, pointing at the top where their information was printed under the name. Though I do think just about every place I’ve ever been had a pizza place called ‘Angelo's’ or some version of it.” She quipped.

Sarah found herself relieved Aaron seemed to want to stick around longer. She hadn’t been quite ready to part ways just yet. Even the thought that the time would come to an end too soon was tugging at her.

[bournelegacy]

He smiled as she seemed to eagerly accept his offer of endless random trivia and movie references. All of the movie references that were coming to mind seemed to be romantic comedies. It didn’t feel entirely appropriate to joke despite the way he was feeling. They had nearly gotten off on the wrong foot once before. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel uncomfortable with him. He genuinely didn’t believe she looked at him in that way but it was hard to dismiss all the similarities of the beginnings of a film. “That’s dangerous to so willingly accept that. You’ll be rolling your eyes soon,” he teased. At least he knew she wasn’t likely to tire of it in a single evening. 

“Maybe that’s it,” he offered as she gave a potential explanation why things felt so easy between them. Aaron smiled warmly as she described how easy and comfortable their conversation was. It made him feel a little less strange for feeling that way knowing she did too. He wondered if they had anything else in common about the way they felt. But he pushed those thoughts aside. There was no point in entertaining them. “I definitely am enjoying this setting a lot more than sitting in a hospital bed. I still get the same great conversation but at least you get a little more in return,” he shot her a knowing smile, “a little anyways." 

Aaron felt a little wave of relief wash over him as she agreed to pizza. Not that he’d gotten any impression she might want the night to end soon but it was nice to know that she wanted it to continue a little longer. At least long enough for them to have dinner together. He tipped his head to the side and shrugged one shoulder as she asked about his preferences for pizza toppings. The truth was he really didn’t know. He’d eaten plenty of pizza but less as Aaron and more as Kenny. He really wasn’t sure what he liked on his pizza anymore. Maybe something had changed. He was well aware there were plenty of things he hadn’t tried yet. It felt strange to admit that to her though. 

“Did you know,” he started giving her a playful grin as he prepared to launch into trivia that she allegedly wanted to hear, “there’s a World Pizza Championship in Italy? There’s also a Pizza Museum in Philly. I haven’t been but I watch something about it.” 

He watched her as she went to find menus in the kitchen. The lack of her presence on the other end of the couch was noticeable to him despite her having not gone far, still in his line of sight. He wasn’t entirely sure what to do with that information but he tucked it away for later evaluation. He smiled as she came back and sat down on the couch again and he took the menu from her. There was a warmth and comfort that seemed to accompany her as she settled in next to him and pointed at the menu. 

He was so caught up in paying attention to her proximity that he nearly missed what she was explaining to him. Aaron smiled, “maybe because it keeps them up at the top of the phone book,” he suggested but laughed softly, “I guess that probably doesn’t really mean much anymore though.” 

Pizza, wine, and chocolate. It felt like it could be a date. Aaron knew it wasn’t but he wondered if this is what it felt like. The circumstances were beyond unusual but they had still managed to carve out some sense of normalcy. They skirted around certain topics and had a strange sense of familiarity with one another that wouldn’t be felt on a first date. He wondered what it might be like if there was a version of reality in which he might ask her on one, and she would accept. And even more so that there could be a second. 

His eyes glanced over the menu and he tipped it slightly so she could look at it if she liked. “I’m happy to have whatever you’d like on it. I don’t remember getting anything too fancy in the past but I’ll try anything,” he gestured slightly to the chocolates between them as evidence.

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

Aaron watched as Corinne seemed to process the information he’d presented her. Given it was immediately clear she didn’t know he had that information, he knew he had potentially revealed something that would upset her if she had intended for Joe to keep their history to himself. As he awaited her response he found himself finding the words to defend Joe’s choice. It had been the best decision he could’ve made at the time. It helped open the door to positive developments in all their relationships. It had been a solid tactical decision on Joe’s part. He didn’t want to cause a rift between the pair in the same way Corinne had worried that the information might cause a rift between him and Joe. 

The smile that brightened her face left him feeling even more relieved. As she continued to explain herself and work through her train of thought he was grateful she wasn’t upset with Joe. He was regretful that she had been worried since that conversation. Now with hindsight he knew very well how the mind could overthink that conversation with Annie and the implications of it. 

Aaron felt light as a feather as she continued to talk, all of the heaviness in his chest truly gone. He laughed softly against her lips as she leaned up to kiss him. Aaron kissed her back with a lingering smile as he pulled away. “It’s our bottle, you can drink directly from it if you need to,” he teased her. 

Aaron pressed one more soft kiss to her lips before he reluctantly pulled away from her to fulfil her request. He had spent enough hours in her apartment to feel comfortable moving around with ease. He collected two glasses and a corkscrew before moving back to where she had settled against the counter. 

“I’m sorry you’ve been worrying about this all week,” he reflected softly as he twisted open the bottle of wine. “I never felt like it was something you were keeping from me. We never really talked about our histories like that, it just never came up,” he offered. “And it never really mattered to me unless there was something in particular you felt like I needed to know or wanted to talk about,” Aaron explained as he poured them both a glass. 

“I would never discuss it with Annie,” he offered in reassurance to Corinne’s previous clarification. “That’s why I denied everything across the board,” he explained. “Not that it’s her business, but I know they’re both pretty sure about us. So to hear everyone be denied would’ve likely made her even more confused,” Aaron smiled as he thought back to the banter. 

“It’s also why I joked with Joe the way I did,” Aaron continued. “I thought maybe you knew and would understand but I’m sorry that it probably caused you to worry even more,” he reflected gently. “I would have said something that night if I thought it was going to worry you.” 

“When we talked, Joe said something similar to me. Even back then,” he offered a glass out to her. “He noticed how we both looked at each other. I knew how I was feeling but what he said made me consider that you might feel the same way,” he confessed softly. “I might have kept believing that it was one-sided unless he’d pointed it out.” 

“So,” he picked up his own wine glass and offered it out to clink against hers, “to Joe in giving us a little nudge in the right direction,” Aaron smiled. 

He took a slow drink from the glass as he contemplated what she’d said. “Also, I want you to know I was never worried about you two,” he explained to her softly. “I don’t think anyone really wants to think about someone they…” he paused for just a fraction of a second, “care about being with someone else,” he admitted softly. Aaron had certainly had to wrestle with some unwanted mental images when Joe had first explained their history. 

“But Joe explained the situation and his perception of it. And the more I watched the two of you together the more it seemed obvious that was the truth.” Joe clearly cared about Corinne deeply. It was beyond merely something professional but stopped short of being romantic. Truthfully, even if Corinne had admitted to having some level of feelings towards Joe, Aaron was fairly certain he could deal with it. As long as she still wanted him there, Aaron knew he would find a way to work through just about anything. “You do definitely seem to have a type though,” he teased her. 

He tipped his head as he regarded her fondly, “Cory,” he started softly, “I hope you know that there’s nothing you need to worry about for a week about before telling me. Short of telling me that you want to end things - there’s nothing you could say or admit or any question you might need to ask me that is going to change things.” He paused, considering, “but I know that’s easier said than done. It’s advice I’m not sure I’d be so good at taking myself,” he admitted with an almost sheepish smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

His laugh at her quip about the wine and the way he smiled against her lips effectively washed away any lingering worry she’d felt. Even if she’d have preferred to have told Aaron herself, she understood how it had happened. Given the initial challenges introducing Annie and Joe to Aaron, it was probably for the best that it had helped Joe and Aaron establish their own relationship. “Don’t tempt me, I just might just do it.” She teased.

“It’s not your fault, Annie has such wildcard tendencies. While that’s an asset to her being someone you want on your side in a dangerous situation, it can present a challenge as you well know.” Corinne replied. “I should have told you about it because I also knew how complicated the entire situation is anyway, every one of us has secrets and for all the different reasons it just would have made sense for me to have told you about it. It wasn’t just any history where the person is out of our lives so it doesn’t matter. It did even just to make sure it was okay, that you were okay.”

“It’s one of your abilities I admire so much, just how quickly you are able to adapt to a situation, read the room and play along with whatever is going on.” She said of his assurances he wouldn’t discuss with Annie and explanation of his joking about Joe the way he did. “You were so much of the reason our very first pizza night went so well, you knew exactly how to respond to whatever they were throwing at you, how to redirect everyone’s attention when needed. Honestly it was a thing of beauty watching you.” The admiration was clear in her tone as well.

“Your response was very funny.” She said with a smile. “The whole conversation was honestly, and I didn’t think about it until later. When you hadn’t said anything, that’s really when I started the overthinking part. And well, you know how that goes, I think, oh it’s fine and suddenly, well is it?” She tilted her head a little, her brow wrinkling as it would in question, then let out a self deprecating laugh.

Corinne took the offered glass from Aaron, listening as he explained Joe’s astute observations. “I can get on board with that toast.” She agreed, gently touching her glass to his. Corinne took a sip, resisting the urge to indulge in more right away. “I’m glad given everything going on around us, that we were able to admit our feelings were more serious. That tendency to try and stay in that self protective mode was muscle memory after so long, like a default setting.”

The way Aaron explained he hadn’t been worried about what had happened between her and Joe tugged at her heart. She never wanted to cause Aaron any kind of pain, there was something in the pause she couldn’t quite name. Joe had come into her life at its lowest point. His quiet way of navigating the world had proved to be exactly the kind of support she needed at the time. Nothing had actually happened between them until much later. “I can understand that.” She said quietly, offering an apologetic smile. In fact she willfully ignored thinking about Aaron with anyone else. She hated the thought of confronting it like it seemed perhaps had happened to Aaron. “I’m sorry that it was sort of forced on you in the way it was. Never my intention, but I should have anticipated it maybe.”

“I’m glad you can see it for yourself. It is nothing like my feelings for you. The two were never the same, though when I met Joe, I didn’t think I’d ever see you again. And the obvious other things that had happened.” She stopped, let out a slow breath. “I was In a bad place. I think eventually both of us might have just wanted something uncomplicated that didn’t come with the risk of loss. Or given my situation, the risk that comes from getting too close to a stranger.”

She laughed at his teasing comment about her having a type. “Good point, and perhaps that was made me choose him for the close protection detail in the beginning.” She mused quietly.

“I do, Aaron but thank you for the reminder.” She gave him a similarly fond smile in return. She loved being able to say his name out loud again, That it meant he was back in her life. He’d lived in a world with aliases and he’d chosen to tell her what turned out to really be his new name. When it had come time to choose what would be her new name, somehow the task was softened just a bit by knowing he’d changed his.

“This one just turned out more complicated than I counted on and it’s tied into a lot of emotions from the past. I’m usually good at keeping them there, but suddenly past and present were jumbled up in a way I hadn’t expected. This time I didn’t quite know how to handle it. The last thing I ever want to do is hurt you with my actions, or blindside you with something I should have disclosed. It might have taken me time to work through it myself. But I’ll do better.” She set her wine glass down for a moment. “Or least try. I’m better at extending grace than giving it to myself sometimes. I did not, however down that entire glass in one go, so progress.” She quipped. “Though I may have to get a hug before I suggest we eat this dinner I made before it gets completely cold.” This time she made the move to close the distance between them. “If that plan is okay with you.”

[bournelegacy]

Aaron laughed softly and nodded in agreement as she described how she had gone down the path of overthinking. “I unfortunately know exactly what you mean,” he smiled at her. Time and time again he found himself grateful that she understood him in that way. His mind worked in a much different way than most people but yet they found far more similarities together than they ever did differences. 

It’s nothing like my feelings for you. 

Deep down, he knew the truth in her statement but it was still a relief to hear the words come from her lips given their current topic. It brought an instant smile to his face as she said it. It caused a warmth to spread through him and soothe any of the concerns his mind may have tried to bring up. 

He frowned slightly as she explained where her mind had been when she’d gotten involved with Joe. His heart ached to think about her being in a bad place and reaching out for someone else. He was grateful Joe had been there to help her navigate during those times. “You don’t have to explain yourself, Cory,” he encouraged gently. “We both thought the other was gone. I was with someone too. I don’t hold that against you and I don’t think you would me, either,” Aaron offered hopefully. 

“I would never have expected you to be waiting on me. I never did even before when I used to come to visit. Let alone waiting on the memory of someone who you thought was gone.” He had worried at times that he would return and find her involved in a serious relationship. Nothing had ever happened between them but he couldn’t deny the thoughts in the back of his mind even if he wanted to try to deny the feelings that came with them. “All I ever wanted was for you to be happy. Finding that before was hard enough and finding it afterwards would’ve been even more challenging. I’m glad Joe was there. This kind of life is lonely enough as it is.” 

He nodded along slowly as she explained how she’d tumbled down the rabbit hole of overthinking and worry. It was not dissimilar to his own bouts of similar instances. He gave her a warm smile. “I’m glad you told me when you were ready. And I’m not hurt or blindsided by any of it, I promise,” he explained gently. Aaron would never know how he might’ve reacted if Joe hadn’t told him previously but he was fairly confident he wouldn’t have been hurt. While it was all still very new, they had established themselves enough that he was relatively safe in the knowledge of how she felt about him - earlier wobble about their conversation topic aside. 

“If it’s anything like I would be, I’m sure you’ve had a lot on your mind this week.” Aaron was momentarily regretful he didn’t see it for what it was. She was exceptionally good at putting on a brave face and deflecting any glimmers of concern he might’ve spotted. But he had committed to trying to stop overanalyzing every tiny detail about her too, it didn’t seem fair to either of them. He was grateful she’d come to him without him pressing too soon. “If you need or want to talk about anything that came up,” he offered softly, “I’m here.” 

Aaron offered her a smile. “You’re allowed to have the whole glass at once. Or the whole bottle. I don’t mind. You’re in good hands,” he teased playfully.. Tipping his head to the side as he regarded her with a smile, he continued, “but I’m happy you don’t feel like you need to have it but you do deserve it.” 

His smile brightened even more as she stepped in closer to him with the request of a hug in the air. Aaron didn’t drop his gaze away from hers as he set his own wine glass down on the counter. His hands came up to gently rest against her hips, drawing her in slowly, “I am more than okay with that plan,” he agreed as an edge of a flirtatious tone returned.  He moved his hands to wrap around her and pull her into a tight embrace. 

Aaron hadn’t realized how much he needed a hug from her as well until he had her wrapped up in his arms. The temporary stress and his own battle with overthinking had caused a lingering tension in him that began to quickly melt away. He breathed in deeply, enjoying the warmth and closeness accompanied by the gentle smell of her shampoo and everything that was Corinne. He was suddenly aware of how happy and relieved he felt. 

Slowly he pulled away so he could look at her, “c’mon,” he encouraged softly as one hand came up to gently trace along the hair against her face before moving to lightly cup her cheek. Aaron tipped his head to press a soft kiss to her lips. “You’ve done all this stress cooking and baking, we wouldn't want it to go to waste,” he teased. 

[andruargentina]

 hands of a man

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

A storm of emotions had suddenly overcome Aaron. The flood of fear and worry had swept him away. It had been a long time since he’d needed to fight his way to the surface as the tidal wave threatened to bury him and make him withdraw completely. There had been wobbles and moments of uncertainty since they’d known one another but something about their new closeness had tripped something deep inside of him. 

The soft touch of her hand on his arm grounded him in the moment. He found himself able to take in a slow albeit unsteady breath as he tried to focus on her soft touch. Even when he had suddenly begun sharing some of his deepest fears, his concerns, some of the skeletons in his closet - she was still there reaching for him. 

Her soft voice speaking his name only served to ground him more. Aaron managed to meet her gaze as she tried to sooth the fears that had swelled up. She seemed so measured, so reasonable. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t expected that reaction. Logically, he knew she was correct. The Kenny she’d met had signed up for something he couldn’t have possibly understood. And the Aaron that Sarah knew had to wrestle with himself as he often did terrible things to secure the new changes in his mind and body. He could’ve chosen the alternative, of course. But would anyone? 

Her assertions that she would’ve made the same choice soothed something amongst the chaos in his mind. Though it was clear it wasn’t the logical side of his mind that had taken flight. He gave her the slightest nod of his head in acknowledgement. Aaron managed to take another slow breath as he tried to steady himself with the assistance of her soft assurances. 

You think I’m suddenly going to realize and not love you any more or turn away from you?

She’d found the heart of it exactly. Of course she didn’t know why that fear had gripped him but she’d come to the correct conclusion all the same. And then she was saying his name in that soft way that tugged right at his heart. He was trying to find the words to explain himself more when she continued and he quieted his mind to focus on her words. Aaron hoped there was never a situation in which she would have to defend him but he had no doubts she would do her best. It was something he’d always worried about. He knew she would put herself in harm’s way in order to try to protect him. Aaron had made that choice to draw away any trouble and paid the price to try to avoid that happening. 

The way her voice caught in her throat as she talked about the man that had hurt her made his heart ache. “I would have done that for you,” he offered softly. There was no doubt in his mind that had the man still been alive, he would’ve paid him a visit. Retribution was not something Aaron often thought about - even for those who had done things to him. Most of his life after Outcome had been hoping to be left alone. Jason Bourne had tried to expose what had happened and Aaron knew the consequences of that. But for her? He absolutely would have. “And I promise nothing would have happened to me.” There was a calm certainty in his tone. He wondered if it would’ve changed things between them if he had. Given his fears, he was quietly thankful he no longer had the opportunity. “But I understand why you felt that way.” 

Corinne opened up her arms to offer him an embrace. He had felt the distance he’d created between them and he wondered if she’d felt it too. They had always been drawn to one another. Always seeking the other out with a reassuring touch. Now with confessions laid bare from both sides it felt even more powerful. All that vulnerability and yet she was still reaching for him, offering him a choice. Always offering him a choice. 

Aaron reached out and pulled her into his arms. “I love you too, Cory.” He breathed out softly. One hand tangled in her hair as he hugged her close with the other. Her words about the choice she’d willingly made threatened to have him come undone completely. Given what they’d both been through in their lives that was no small admission. 

He let out an unsteady breath as he clutched her tightly. “I’m sorry,” he swallowed hard. “You don’t have to convince me. This isn’t your fault,” he professed softly. “You’ve never given me any reason to doubt this is….” he sighed shakily, “this is me.” He gently stroked her hair as he held her close. 

Aaron slowly pulled away from the embrace. It was only enough so he could look into her eyes. He felt compelled to see her as much as hold her. “We were talking about having a honeymoon phase. I was thinking about how I couldn’t believe this was my life and how happy I am,” a faint smile tugged at his lips as he looked at her. Aaron felt guilty for souring that moment with his sudden overwhelm of emotions. But he tried to push that aside. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel like something she’d done or said had caused his upset. He knew himself, and her, well enough to know that’s likely where either of their minds would go. 

“And we were talking about the past. You’ve only ever known one side of me. You let me be someone I couldn’t be with anyone else. That I’ve never been with anyone else,” he admitted softly. “And for a long time I’ve worried that if you saw the other side of me that it might change your mind. I didn’t want you to make this choice without knowing everything. And then my mind does what it does best…” he trailed off with a soft sigh. 

Aaron swallowed hard. The nervousness gripped at his chest again and he knew he had to continue. Corinne deserved to know. She had bravely spoken about things that had happened to her and he owed her the same trust and faith she’d shown in him. 

“It happened before when I got close to someone,” he finally admitted softly. “She saw everything. She knew the Outcome operative first. It was too much for her in the end and she changed her mind. I’ve always worried it would change yours too.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She knew he would have done anything for her but Corinne didn’t know how to explain any better why she hadn’t wanted him to. She’d known eventually she would have told him, but she didn’t want bring him into that ugliness. “I know you would done that for me.” She whispered. “I always knew that.” Her voice was catching as she tried to get the words out. “But I didn’t want to leave that stain on you or what we had together. All I ever needed was exactly what you did tonight. What we have with each other is everything to me.”

“Those little snatches of time together we managed to carve out, they meant the world to me. At the time I didn’t quite realize they were the same for you. Back then, we couldn’t talk about so much, but also it was the best kind of respite from all of it. We could be Aaron and Sarah.”

“Now we do talk about more and maybe I was finally ready to share that ugliness from my past because as hard as it was, I knew in my heart how you would react.”

When he pulled her into his arms, she let out the softest sigh of relief. Her arms went around him, holding close as if she was afraid maybe he’d pull away. He was holding her tightly, that hand in her hair bringing a kind of comfort she couldn’t name. Where words were failing her, their silent communication conveyed those feelings. In reflex to just how perfect it felt, her fingers reached for the short ends of his hair to toy with them as he held her close.

As much as it felt like exactly what she needed, she had to remind herself she’d been trying to sooth his fears and calm his storms. “You don’t need to sorry.” She whispered back. “I'm here for everything, even the harder things.” The way he stroked her hair as spoke washed over her, the relief in hearing him start to explain was visceral. She met his eyes as he went on, trying to explain. Corinne was sadly familiar with those times when the worry and doubts seeped in around the edges of what were thoughts that were so far removed, the switch felt like a tidal wave threatening to wash all the happiness away like sand.

She nodded as he went to try and explain. She wanted to understand because it seemed her reassurances weren’t quite landing the way they should. There was still something there lodged like a splinter so deep it couldn’t be reached. She moved her hand to settle on his shoulder, reluctant to break the contact though she didn’t quite know why.

When he talked about how he could be the person with her that he couldn’t be anywhere else, her smile turned fond with those memories once more. When he finally got out what it seemed he hadn’t been able to before, it started to click into place like a puzzle piece that had been hidden under others and not visible just yet.

She nodded, listening as he explained. It wasn’t that she hadn’t assumed he’d been with other people. She just hadn’t wanted to think about it. They hadn’t spoken much of their pasts because it hadn’t seemed necessary. She was happy he hadn’t been alone. What brought tears to her eyes though was the thought that someone had hurt him.

Corinne brought her hand to his cheek and traced a tender trail with the tips of her fingers. She let out a soft breath, hoping she could speak without her voice cracking because she didn’t want him to think she was hurt. “I’m so sorry someone hurt you.” She said very softly. “I kept hoping if you were out there somewhere that you were happy.” She paused for a beat, trying to get the words right. “I don’t know what happened, or the specifics and I don’t need to.” She said. “Unless you want to share, then I’m always willing to listen. And it’s understandable you’d have doubts and worries that it could happen again. However, what I do know is how I feel and how I felt. So, I don’t know if it’s different or will ease your mind, but I’m going to try to put this into words.”

She let out a soft, albeit a little shaky breath. She’d never really talked much about that time after they’d last seen each other. “You are the only person who knew me when I was Sarah. It took me a long time to come to terms with what I lost. I know what it was like to live in this world without you and how I feel now that I have you back.” The tears were there shining in her eyes, but they hadn’t fallen. “I don’t ever want to go back to that.” Her voice cracked a little. She let out another breath. “And maybe because I knew you before and I got to meet Aaron and even though I could guess or imagine what your role with them entailed, that has never mattered to me, I am not proud of everything I did back then. What I can say and I feel confident about is there is nothing that will change my mind about wanting to stay with you. I fell in love with you. All of you.” She whispered. “No relationship is all sunshine and roses, I’m here for the good because we have a lot that but I am not going anywhere when things are tougher.”

“If there’s more you’re worried about or want to talk through, I’m here to listen.”

[bournelegacy]

The way her voice was catching in her throat had his heart aching. “What we have means everything to me too,” he reflected quietly. “That time we had together kept me going. It gave me something to look forward to when I had nothing else.”

Aaron breathed in softly when she spoke her old name. It was a name that had held so much significance to him. He’d held it tightly in his heart as he’d been pulled all around the world to do terrible things. Even in the darkest moments, the loneliest stretches, he’d had Sarah. He’d become accustomed to her new name and it felt natural to call her by it now. But there would always be a particular fondness for Sarah. 

He felt guilty that he’d derailed their evening into being about his own worries when it had begun with her expressing her own. But there she was, expressing how she’d trusted him with her heart. She may have hesitated in asking him to deal with her past for fear of the repercussions of his own actions, but she’d trusted him enough to share. Trusted his reaction. That soothed his heart more than he could adequately express.  “I am happy you shared when you did,” he acknowledged softly. While he hadn’t wanted her to have to hold onto that alone, she had wisdom in shielding them both from any repercussions. There was no telling what it might’ve changed between them. 

He saw the tears come to her eyes as he had begun to explain himself. Aaron worried that he had said too much. The last thing he’d wanted was to hurt her with his admission. He’d wanted to explain himself so she understood where the fears and worries had suddenly emerged from but he felt like he was hurting Corinne in the process. As he was considering trying to walk back his words, she was reaching out to him again. Her hand pressed lightly against his cheek brought an immediate warmth and comfort. By now, he should’ve expected her to be reaching for him when he felt least worthy of that comfort. Still, it surprised him and he was deeply grateful for her once again. 

He frowned slightly as she apologized for someone hurting him. Aaron hadn’t truly considered it in that light despite it being exactly what happened. He had been hurt. The damage was clear and evident in the conversation they were currently having. There had been damage done by Outcome but somehow the thing that had kept him most hesitant, most reserved, most unwilling to take that next step with Corinne had always been the damage done by his broken heart. 

He leaned into her touch as he stayed quiet to give her space to share what was on her mind. It only took a moment before the emotion was welling up. His chest was tight as everything threatened to spill over. The tears in her eyes made his heart ache even more. Her voice cracking had him reaching out to gently cup her face. 

“Cory,” his voice was thick with emotion as he looked at her, his thumb lightly caressing her cheek. They hadn’t delved into those dark days when they both thought the other was no longer alive. He hurt for the past version of her that had believed him dead. Aaron had faced her death as he fought to hold onto his life as he knew it. It had only been later when he’d really grieved. Meanwhile, she’d lost everything all at once.  “We don’t ever have to go back to that. I thought I lost you forever once, I never want to experience that again. When I left the cafe, that was hard enough. Being too far from you in this bed was bad enough,” there was the faintest return of that humor, a small flicker of a smile as he looked at her. God, he loved her. 

There was part of him that found himself still wanting to argue with her and he wasn’t sure why. He wanted to insist that there was no way she could’ve chosen all of him. Not when she hadn’t seen every ugly corner of his past. She hadn’t seen it the way Marta had. The calculation, deception, manipulation, violence, and death. How could she choose all of him? Aaron wasn’t sure why he felt so compelled to get her to change her mind. The reality was it wouldn’t hurt any less if she rejected him in that moment or six months or a year or ten years later. The devastation would be monumental at any point. 

I’m not going anywhere when things are tougher. 

And like she often did, Corinne managed to find the words to soothe things that he hadn’t even voiced yet. 

Aaron moved his hand away from her cheek and moved to gently take both of her hands into his. He gave them a gentle squeeze, thumb lightly caressing the top of her hand. “I need you to know something, Cory,” he paused to study her features for a moment. “I believe you mean what you say about me, about us,” he gave her hands another gentle squeeze. “I don’t doubt you. Not for a second.” 

Having her hands in his grounded him, allowing him to parse through the wild flow of conflicting thoughts and emotions. “The hard part is believing that I deserve it,” he swallowed hard, “after everything.” His brow furrowed slightly, “after…” he sighed, “I didn’t blame her. It made sense that this was too much for anyone to deal with. That me, that I, was too much. That this was all too hard. It’s not easy to live with someone who is in their own head all the time. Or be with someone that can do the things I can do or think the way I do. It’s not fair sometimes…” he trailed off a slight frown lingering on his features. 

“But what we have is different,” he offered softly, “the way I feel for you…” his voice caught in his throat again and he shook his head a little trying to ease the emotion, “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life,” it seemed at odds with the intense emotions swirling but it didn’t change the fact, “and thinking about losing that got away from me.”

[heartstringed-deactivated201705]

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

Aaron leaned ever so gently into her touch as she pressed her hand to his cheek. As much as his ingrained survival instincts had him wanting to retract and pull away from her, to self protect, there was another part of him that desperately wanted to accept her gentle reassurance. Even if he wasn’t sure he deserved it at that moment. He was stumbling through his explanation as to why he wasn’t the man she thought he was and yet she still was reaching out for him. Aaron wasn’t sure that he deserved to have someone so dedicated to him. 

Nothing will change how I see you. 

It nearly caused him to unravel. It was everything he needed to hear and yet his mind fought him at every step of the way. He couldn’t really hear her. The fears in his own mind louder than the trust in her softly spoken assurances. “No, Cory,” he spoke softly, “no you don’t understand.” Aaron wasn’t sure why he was so compelled to change her mind. If she didn’t know who he was and what he’d done - could she really ever choose him? All of him? 

She had worried that the information she shared about her past would change something about the way he saw her. The confession she had made to him was so different. She hadn’t done anything wrong. She may have made choices she regretted but she wasn’t wrong or bad, or evil. 

Aaron drew in an unsteady breath as he moved to sit up more. The usual calm steadiness fracturing under tension in a moment of restlessness. One side of his mind loudly demanded that he pull away and get space. The other, desperate to stay in her gentle embrace and erase all the thoughts that were springing to mind. He wasn’t sure what had sparked the sudden bolt of panic in his mind but he did his best to keep himself calm with a steadying breath. 

All those parts of you are pieces of the whole man you became and I fell in love with. 

They had never delved into his life with Outcome. It had been off limits when she was Sarah. And since being back in her life at the cafe they had tried to focus on the present. Now with all the swirling emotions the reality of Outcome felt heavier than ever. The hum of concern that his past had been in the back of his mind now amping up to full volume. What if he wasn’t who she thought he was? She knew Kenny and Aaron but there were other parts of him too. Had he somehow fooled her into falling in love with him? To falling in love with a lie? 

“How can you know?” He asked, almost helplessly as he studied her features. “How can you know nothing is going to change?” His voice was so soft. As the words left his mouth he suddenly realized why those feelings were bubbling up so intensely. Marta. They’d gotten close. Or what Aaron had believed at the time to be close. And then suddenly she’d changed her mind. 

“Those times apart. I wasn’t exactly on a business trip. I did a lot of things,” his voice barely a whisper, “I hurt a lot of people.” His brow furrowed. Aaron knew that it was likely something she knew already. She wasn’t foolish. They had both worked for the same shadowy organization. She was smart enough to know that there was something much larger afoot. Particularly after the explosion and everything that came undone afterwards. 

“I could’ve easily been one of those people coming after you. A file with instructions and made up intel. Not asking too many questions and just doing what I was told,” Aaron swallowed hard. “I was that person to a lot of people. I don’t think I’m a good person, Cory.” He confessed quietly. “You’ve never had to see that side of me. Not really.” Aaron looked down at his hands again. All the damage had healed on his body but it was clear that his mind had not been so unscathed. 

“I had to,” he stated the obvious counterpoint to his own concerns. “If I didn’t, Aaron would go right back to Kenny.” That fear had gripped him every single day until Marta had helped viral him off the chems and completely break Outcome’s hold on him. “So I didn’t really have to. I chose to do those things for what I got in return.” 

His chest ached from the tension. All of the fears he’d suppressed since the day he’d sat down across from Sarah in the cafe seemed to be cracking through and spilling out. He felt like he had been hiding himself for too long now. It wasn’t fair to her. She was serious. She was making promises about a future together. She had let him close, they’d finally confessed their love for one another. What if she changed her mind now? 

“But,” he hesitated, “even though I don’t have to do those things anymore doesn’t mean I won’t. It doesn’t change what I’m capable of doing.” He swallowed hard. “It’s not hard for me to be that person. If someone came after you, I would do anything to stop them.”

“That’s why you didn’t want to tell me what happened before. You worried what I might do,” he remembered suddenly. “You do know. You did know,” he reasoned out softly. “You did know what I was capable of and what I might do,” he stated quietly, fully understanding the gravity of that realization for the first time. 

When she’d first stated it, it had made him sad to know she felt that way about him. He had been worried that his potential for violence had kept her isolated. Now, it felt like he was seeing it in an entirely different light. She had thought about what he might do if he knew someone had harmed her. She’d fully considered his capabilities and his motivations. It wasn’t an afterthought. His past wasn’t some vague idea to her. She knew and she’d thought about it. She’d thought about it before she’d confessed her secrets. Before they’d been intimate. Before she’d told him that she loved him. 

“I worried that if you ever realized. Really saw that side of me that you would change your mind about everything.” It had happened before. Aaron hadn’t realized how much he had anticipated that it would happen again. 

His voice caught in his throat again, “but you’re still here.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

No, Cory, no you don’t understand

Even though his voice was soft, the words and something in his tone tugged at her heart. Anguish. It was the way he moved to sit up, even if it wasn’t entirely so, she felt it deep in her bones the sense of him pulling away. The disquiet was unsettling. What was it that tortured him so?

How can you know?

There it was.

She opened her mouth to answer. Of course she couldn’t know for certain. No one could say anything with one hundred percent certainty. Before the words were out of her mouth she knew that anything she could say wouldn’t be adequate in that moment. No one could predict the future. He knew that as well as she did. If anything both of them knew well how everything could change on a dime. She didn’t think it could be that, it wouldn’t explain how tormented he seemed suddenly. He was searching for something and until she knew just what it was that worried him so, she risked missing the mark entirely or making it worse.

So she did the only other thing she could think to do in the moment and reached out with her hand to touch him to reconnect. Her hand to his skin because they were both still not wearing any clothes making them even more vulnerable in the moment and whatever had suddenly made him pull away, even slightly, she wanted to respect that until he disclosed what was on his mind. So her hand lay tenderly on his arm. “Tell me what’s worrying you.” She said very softly, quiet so as not to disturb but encourage him to continue.

I don’t think I’m a good person, Cory

Her heart broke a little in that moment.. Not because she believed that, but because he did. Again, she felt certain the words wanting to fall from her lips were wholly inadequate and might not land in his current state of mind. So again, she communicated wordlessly with the touch of her thumb. Just a soft stroke. He wasn’t going to change her mind about her feelings for him and it was important she find a way to make him believe it.

For a moment as he was telling her that he could have been one of those people that came after her, the briefest flicker of pain made her ache for him having to worry about a choice he might have been forced to make. It would have been a cruel twist of fate that she knew with absolute certainty the people in charge would have taken pleasure in forcing on him or her. A chill ran through her.

“Aaron.” She said, the same tone filled with her love for him that never wavered and wouldn’t now. “You’re not evil, the people who put you in that impossible position with the most twisted kind of incentive to do as you’re told or suffer the consequences were. And anyone would have made exactly the same choice in that circumstance, including me.” She firmly believed that, though if he believed her was another thing entirely and for a moment she feared he’d consider leaving her again. And that thought broke her heart.

“I know you would.” She said quietly when he confessed he’d do the same thing to anyone who came after her. “That changes nothing for me.” She would, to the extent she could, do the same to anyone who threatened him.Though she knew she’d need some kind of weapon to do harm where it was dawning to her that he was the weapon and that was what was causing his agony. It was his fear that she wouldn’t understand. As she was trying to find the words that still didn’t make a difference to her, he was going on.

All over again her heart ached for him. Or had it ever stopped while he spoke, she wondered. It felt as if he’d suddenly understood something.

“They made you into a weapon.” She said softly “That’s what been worrying you so much isn’t it? You think I’m suddenly going to realize and not love you any more or turn away from you?” She was already shaking her head no. Not possible. “Aaron.” She said his name with all the reverence in her heart. “It’s not even about the weapon. It’s the conviction. I’d absolutely find any weapon I could to hurt anyone who hurt you and wouldn’t regret a thing.”

“But what you might think you know about why I didn’t tell you sooner about what had happened to me wasn’t ever about me fearing what you’d do.” She stopped, her voice catching. “God if I was being honest, I would have welcomed it.” She shook her head, her eyes meeting his. “The only reason I didn’t want that to happen was never about anything except not wanting to put that burden on you. You did what you did for Outcome because of the consequences to you if you refused. This act would have put you at risk of getting in trouble in other ways that we wouldn’t have been able to fix and I couldn’t bear to put that on you. That man wasn’t worth your life for what he took from me. I refused to let that be another result of his selfish acts.”

“Yes, I am still here and nothing you’ve just said changed that.” She wanted nothing more in that moment than to wrap him up in her arms and show him. But it had to be on his terms, his choice. Because both of them had suffered enough at the hands of others making choices for them.

Corinne moved her hand from his arm so she could open both her arms to him to offer that hug. “I wish I could convince you of that. I know you trust me, but I also understand what you fear. Thank you for telling me, I know how hard that is to do, give voice to your fears. All I can do is keep showing you I am not going to change my mind. Those same hands you used to carry out orders you were given, are the same ones that touch me with all the tenderness in the world. I could say that I’ve compromised myself to work for the same agency but it pales in comparison to what you went through.”

She took a shaky breath and let it out. “I love you, Aaron.” She said softly. “We’ve both made choices based on things that other people controlled. This one, is one the best I’ve made for myself and no one coerced me to make it. You showed me what it feels like to be accepted for who I am. Take from that what you will.”

[bournelegacy]

A storm of emotions had suddenly overcome Aaron. The flood of fear and worry had swept him away. It had been a long time since he’d needed to fight his way to the surface as the tidal wave threatened to bury him and make him withdraw completely. There had been wobbles and moments of uncertainty since they’d known one another but something about their new closeness had tripped something deep inside of him. 

The soft touch of her hand on his arm grounded him in the moment. He found himself able to take in a slow albeit unsteady breath as he tried to focus on her soft touch. Even when he had suddenly begun sharing some of his deepest fears, his concerns, some of the skeletons in his closet - she was still there reaching for him. 

Her soft voice speaking his name only served to ground him more. Aaron managed to meet her gaze as she tried to sooth the fears that had swelled up. She seemed so measured, so reasonable. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t expected that reaction. Logically, he knew she was correct. The Kenny she’d met had signed up for something he couldn’t have possibly understood. And the Aaron that Sarah knew had to wrestle with himself as he often did terrible things to secure the new changes in his mind and body. He could’ve chosen the alternative, of course. But would anyone? 

Her assertions that she would’ve made the same choice soothed something amongst the chaos in his mind. Though it was clear it wasn’t the logical side of his mind that had taken flight. He gave her the slightest nod of his head in acknowledgement. Aaron managed to take another slow breath as he tried to steady himself with the assistance of her soft assurances. 

You think I’m suddenly going to realize and not love you any more or turn away from you?

She’d found the heart of it exactly. Of course she didn’t know why that fear had gripped him but she’d come to the correct conclusion all the same. And then she was saying his name in that soft way that tugged right at his heart. He was trying to find the words to explain himself more when she continued and he quieted his mind to focus on her words. Aaron hoped there was never a situation in which she would have to defend him but he had no doubts she would do her best. It was something he’d always worried about. He knew she would put herself in harm’s way in order to try to protect him. Aaron had made that choice to draw away any trouble and paid the price to try to avoid that happening. 

The way her voice caught in her throat as she talked about the man that had hurt her made his heart ache. “I would have done that for you,” he offered softly. There was no doubt in his mind that had the man still been alive, he would’ve paid him a visit. Retribution was not something Aaron often thought about - even for those who had done things to him. Most of his life after Outcome had been hoping to be left alone. Jason Bourne had tried to expose what had happened and Aaron knew the consequences of that. But for her? He absolutely would have. “And I promise nothing would have happened to me.” There was a calm certainty in his tone. He wondered if it would’ve changed things between them if he had. Given his fears, he was quietly thankful he no longer had the opportunity. “But I understand why you felt that way.” 

Corinne opened up her arms to offer him an embrace. He had felt the distance he’d created between them and he wondered if she’d felt it too. They had always been drawn to one another. Always seeking the other out with a reassuring touch. Now with confessions laid bare from both sides it felt even more powerful. All that vulnerability and yet she was still reaching for him, offering him a choice. Always offering him a choice. 

Aaron reached out and pulled her into his arms. “I love you too, Cory.” He breathed out softly. One hand tangled in her hair as he hugged her close with the other. Her words about the choice she’d willingly made threatened to have him come undone completely. Given what they’d both been through in their lives that was no small admission. 

He let out an unsteady breath as he clutched her tightly. “I’m sorry,” he swallowed hard. “You don’t have to convince me. This isn’t your fault,” he professed softly. “You’ve never given me any reason to doubt this is….” he sighed shakily, “this is me.” He gently stroked her hair as he held her close. 

Aaron slowly pulled away from the embrace. It was only enough so he could look into her eyes. He felt compelled to see her as much as hold her. “We were talking about having a honeymoon phase. I was thinking about how I couldn’t believe this was my life and how happy I am,” a faint smile tugged at his lips as he looked at her. Aaron felt guilty for souring that moment with his sudden overwhelm of emotions. But he tried to push that aside. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel like something she’d done or said had caused his upset. He knew himself, and her, well enough to know that’s likely where either of their minds would go. 

“And we were talking about the past. You’ve only ever known one side of me. You let me be someone I couldn’t be with anyone else. That I’ve never been with anyone else,” he admitted softly. “And for a long time I’ve worried that if you saw the other side of me that it might change your mind. I didn’t want you to make this choice without knowing everything. And then my mind does what it does best…” he trailed off with a soft sigh. 

Aaron swallowed hard. The nervousness gripped at his chest again and he knew he had to continue. Corinne deserved to know. She had bravely spoken about things that had happened to her and he owed her the same trust and faith she’d shown in him. 

“It happened before when I got close to someone,” he finally admitted softly. “She saw everything. She knew the Outcome operative first. It was too much for her in the end and she changed her mind. I’ve always worried it would change yours too.”

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

Aaron smiled as she reflected on what they’d thought was going to be a single brief encounter all those years ago. “I believed it was going to be the only time too,” he admitted softly, now able to look back upon that time more fondly with the benefit of having her in his arms. “I had to come back regularly for medical work ups. It was close enough to where you worked. Before I came to see you the second time, I thought a lot about what I should do. I wanted to come see you, of course. But I was worried,” he admitted. “I decided to take another chance and when it seemed like you were happy to see me again, it kinda made up my mind for all the other times.” 

“After that, I should’ve known I was in trouble,” he teased as he looked at her warmly, “all of a sudden I was measuring my time by when I’d see you again.” The cold and clinical invasive medicals could be endured knowing the sharp contrast of the warm and welcoming embrace that would be waiting for him afterwards. 

“Those little pockets of time were everything to me,” he confessed softly. “Deep down I guess I always knew what it meant. What it meant to me anyways, even if I couldn’t see clearly what you were feeling,” he admitted almost sheepishly. “Maybe I did know what it meant, I just wasn’t supposed to. It wasn’t something I was allowed to want,” he added sadly. “It wasn’t only discouraged, it was forbidden - punished, if they found out.” Aaron thought about the other operative up on the mountain in Alaska. It hadn’t been expressly confirmed but he’d gathered enough. Isolated and punished for falling in love on a mission. Aaron had been punished too, but as far as he knew, they didn’t know it was for the same reason. 

“That second time was especially hard to say goodbye,” he reflected, “it felt like there were suddenly possibilities we didn’t have that first goodbye. And then it got harder and harder to leave.” Then there was that fateful last goodbye with Sarah. Neither of them knew what was to come. The possibility that had always loomed finally came to fruition. 

“Those times that I spent with you helped me get through all the other things,” he confessed. “I think they thought that having something outside of our missions would be a distraction. But you weren’t a distraction. You were motivation. Those times with you helped me get through and looking forward to the next time I would see you helped me focus.” 

While he was still skeptical of her assessment of him, he could see where her perspective arose. There was no denying that her continued explanation of how she saw him drew some warmth in his cheeks, an almost shy look glancing away from her perceptive gaze. 

He shook his head before reflecting, almost bitterly, “I guess maybe they were right in the end. Because you helped to show me that I was more than just the operative. That there was a person under all of that. You only ever saw Aaron, not the rest of it. Maybe that’s why you see me that way when it’s…” the emotion caught thick in his throat, “hard for me to see.”  

All he could think about was how Marta had only known him as a number. There had been no humanity there. He was a data set. An experiment. And then there had been Sarah, now Corinne, where the genuine care for him had run so deeply that it had ignored all sense of self preservation and safety. The difference was stark. One had seen him as a number for years while the other had desperately sought to get to know the man beneath the cloak of secrecy that surrounded his entire existence. 

The gentle touch to his face drew him out of his thoughts. He leaned into it, as he always did any time she had ever chosen to reach out for him. They had always been drawn to one another even as they’d tried to convince themselves that all of the small affections had been entirely platonic. 

He listened carefully as she explained her motivations and desires to help people like she had Kenny. Whether she meant to or not, it felt like she was speaking directly to the concerns that had burdened him for so long. The reassurances found their way into his heart and tried to settle the flare of nerves that the conversation had ignited. “It’s not your fault that I have these concerns, Cory,” he didn’t like the idea that she might feel like she needed to change anything about the way she was with him to assure him further. The fear resided entirely within him, fueled by his own past and concerns. 

“You didn’t see any of your patients differently,” he started softly, “but I worry it might change when it’s the man in your bed,” his brow furrowed slightly as he looked at his hand that gently had been caressing her face, “that touches you with the same hands that…” a flash of incidents sparked through his mind as he swallowed hard, “make me a lot different than the person you see.” 

The fear clutched at his chest. All the survival instincts threatened to shut him down and push her away in an effort to protect himself. He let out an unsteady breath as he wrestled with himself. “The reason I came up here alone when I was hurt was because I was afraid of what it would change. Assuming what I’m out there doing and seeing it are two different things. I always wanted you to just see me as Aaron. Not all of that. With you, I got to be that man I wanted to be and you didn’t have to know the rest. I didn’t want that to change,” he reflected quietly. Every time he’d braced himself for her to retreat, whether it was Sarah in a cafe or Corinne standing on the porch of the cabin - she’d stepped up closer to him instead. “I learned how to be Aaron with you. But the reality is, I’m all of that. Kenny, Aaron, and Outcome operative number five.”

He shook his head a little as she teased him. Something about the word honeymoon made his heart flutter. The intensity of all the emotions swirling around only added to that. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed,” there was a note of teasing in his voice. “Other than noticing if someone has feelings for me, I’m pretty perceptive. This might be the longest honeymoon period on record considering how much time I’ve had to notice and not see any so-called imperfections. You do have quite the temper with that coffee grinder,” he teased, a grin tugging at the corners of his lips. “But I can forgive that. I think you’re safe. It’ll be pretty hard to get rid of me at this point,” he joked. While he felt like their situations were entirely different, he could appreciate that they both seemed able to look past the others’ concerns about themselves and see the person they were with each other. Flawed? Perhaps. But still loved. 

“I never imagined I could have a future. I developed escape plans. I dreamed and I hoped but deep down I never thought it was possible for so many reasons,” he brushed his fingertips along her cheek, “and yet here you are.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She knew how she’d felt about those visits, but they’ve never really spoken of it in depth. Corinne found herself listening in fascination to hear it from Aaron’s perspective. “You have no idea just how happy I was you made that choice.” She recalled the feeling like it was only yesterday but couldn’t put it into words that would adequately convey what it meant to her.

“It was so hard to say goodbye to you that first time. It didn’t make any sense, we barely knew one another and yet it was making my heart ache. Now it makes some kind of sense, but then it didn’t. At least not that I understood at the time.” She said quietly. “I knew you, or I had in a different way so it was familiar in the sense that we had a past, but it was I suppose like seeing someone you’d maybe known in the past or something and they were different without only traces of the person they once were.” She shook her head, slightly furrowing her brow as it that wasn’t quite right. “I don’t know if I’m making any sense since it really doesn’t to me. How it felt so comfortable and some kind of instant bond.”

all of a sudden I was measuring my time by when I’d see you again

She hadn’t realized that’s how he’d viewed it. The words nearly drew her breath away before they filled her with warmth and settled deep into a place she hadn’t realized had been wanting. “It meant exactly the same thing to me, even though I didn’t recognize it for what it was at the time.” She admitted quietly, a lingering sense of wonder at how he’d managed to put into words what she hadn’t admitted to at the time between those visits.

“I’d been so busy chasing everyone away if they got too close, you got passed all my defenses and I didn’t even realize at first.” It was yet another realization as they spoke of those moments that were both some of the most amazing with painful ones in between. She’d understood her own perspective, but to hear Aaron’s was entirely different.

Aaron’s quiet admission that getting attached was not only discouraged but forbidden made her heart ache for him. Hearing him say punished sent a chill running through her. Though she’d known it was dangerous for him, it had been an abstract thought until he put a definition to it, a consequence for disobeying an expressed rule.

She had felt exactly the same about him leaving. Though she should have realized, to hear him put into words and confirm he felt it too was a wholly different thing. “I didn’t want to say anything, I never wanted to make it harder for you.” She admitted quietly.

Corinne should have realized what those visits meant to Aaron, it was there evidenced by every time he showed up. Yet somehow she hadn’t realized what he’d gone through to get to see her. Those stolen moments he carved out of nothing to return took on a whole new meaning to her. “I knew how much they meant to me, I didn’t realize what they did for you, what those brief snatches of time provided for you, my love.” She whispered, reaching out to trail two gentle fingers down his face.

She listened as he explained his perspective, though as he’d begun to open up about just how tight a leash they kept on him, the rules they enforced, she’d already started to understand why there was such a difference between what she saw and what he believed about himself. The side her showed to her was in bits and pieces compared to the life he led and what that entailed. She had a renewed sense of admiration for him, for how he’d parsed out the different sides. Corinne wanted to wrap him up in her arms when he got a little choked up trying to explain. Not wanting to interrupt, she simply lay her hand against his cheek, palm cupping slightly. A sign that she was there.

but I worry it might change when it’s the man in your bed

She was shaking her head ever so slightly. “Nothing will change how I see you, nothing will make me change my mind. I chose you and I will keep choosing you. You’re the only man I want in my bed. No one else gets to see what we have, that’s ours and nothing can take that away or change it.” She promised.

Of course she knew he was Kenny, perhaps those remnants of his innocence and gentleness never left. Aaron was able to integrate those seamlessly into the man he became. Those ties they had were never truly severed. She smiled fondly when he told her that he learned how to be Aaron with her. All those times they’d found to spend time together where she asked the questions she could to draw him out, to learn what he liked, or thought or did in his free time. In retrospect must have done as much for him as they had for her. It was when he mentioned how they referred to his identity in Outcome that the chill once more twisted down her spine with its icy chill. She couldn’t mask the ache that tugged at her heart from being reflected in her eyes. “All those parts of you are pieces of the whole man you became and I fell in love with.” She said tenderly. “I’m not going to turn away from you. Even the moments apart built what we have today.”

“The longest honeymoon period on record sounds pretty darn good to me.” She tossed back just as playfully. “Sounds about right for us, doesn’t it?” She teased. “And as I’ve said before, any appliances involved in the process of making coffee have no excuse not to work in a place that serves coffee, short temper is warranted. And technically it’s the espresso machine who is the worst offender of the bunch.” She quipped with a grin. “The bigger ones seem to be the most recalcitrant. Look if you’re going to stick around, maybe you can stand there and look intimidating see if that gets them all to fall in line without me coming at them with various wrenches and other tools.”

“I’m happy to hear all that.” She said softly. “Because I don’t want to get rid of you, we’ve not had nearly enough time together.” She added. “I never thought I’d see you again, I thought I was a ghost without a future.” She closed her eyes and leaned into that impossibly gentle touch. “Safe to say we’re stuck with each other and I can’t imagine anything better than that.” She opened her eyes, meeting his once more. She knew he’d have to learn over time she meant to keep her promises and that nothing that he could do or might happen would erase of that in her eyes.

[bournelegacy]

Aaron leaned ever so gently into her touch as she pressed her hand to his cheek. As much as his ingrained survival instincts had him wanting to retract and pull away from her, to self protect, there was another part of him that desperately wanted to accept her gentle reassurance. Even if he wasn’t sure he deserved it at that moment. He was stumbling through his explanation as to why he wasn’t the man she thought he was and yet she still was reaching out for him. Aaron wasn’t sure that he deserved to have someone so dedicated to him. 

Nothing will change how I see you. 

It nearly caused him to unravel. It was everything he needed to hear and yet his mind fought him at every step of the way. He couldn’t really hear her. The fears in his own mind louder than the trust in her softly spoken assurances. “No, Cory,” he spoke softly, “no you don’t understand.” Aaron wasn’t sure why he was so compelled to change her mind. If she didn’t know who he was and what he’d done - could she really ever choose him? All of him? 

She had worried that the information she shared about her past would change something about the way he saw her. The confession she had made to him was so different. She hadn’t done anything wrong. She may have made choices she regretted but she wasn’t wrong or bad, or evil. 

Aaron drew in an unsteady breath as he moved to sit up more. The usual calm steadiness fracturing under tension in a moment of restlessness. One side of his mind loudly demanded that he pull away and get space. The other, desperate to stay in her gentle embrace and erase all the thoughts that were springing to mind. He wasn’t sure what had sparked the sudden bolt of panic in his mind but he did his best to keep himself calm with a steadying breath. 

All those parts of you are pieces of the whole man you became and I fell in love with. 

They had never delved into his life with Outcome. It had been off limits when she was Sarah. And since being back in her life at the cafe they had tried to focus on the present. Now with all the swirling emotions the reality of Outcome felt heavier than ever. The hum of concern that his past had been in the back of his mind now amping up to full volume. What if he wasn’t who she thought he was? She knew Kenny and Aaron but there were other parts of him too. Had he somehow fooled her into falling in love with him? To falling in love with a lie? 

“How can you know?” He asked, almost helplessly as he studied her features. “How can you know nothing is going to change?” His voice was so soft. As the words left his mouth he suddenly realized why those feelings were bubbling up so intensely. Marta. They’d gotten close. Or what Aaron had believed at the time to be close. And then suddenly she’d changed her mind. 

“Those times apart. I wasn’t exactly on a business trip. I did a lot of things,” his voice barely a whisper, “I hurt a lot of people.” His brow furrowed. Aaron knew that it was likely something she knew already. She wasn’t foolish. They had both worked for the same shadowy organization. She was smart enough to know that there was something much larger afoot. Particularly after the explosion and everything that came undone afterwards. 

“I could’ve easily been one of those people coming after you. A file with instructions and made up intel. Not asking too many questions and just doing what I was told,” Aaron swallowed hard. “I was that person to a lot of people. I don’t think I’m a good person, Cory.” He confessed quietly. “You’ve never had to see that side of me. Not really.” Aaron looked down at his hands again. All the damage had healed on his body but it was clear that his mind had not been so unscathed. 

“I had to,” he stated the obvious counterpoint to his own concerns. “If I didn’t, Aaron would go right back to Kenny.” That fear had gripped him every single day until Marta had helped viral him off the chems and completely break Outcome’s hold on him. “So I didn’t really have to. I chose to do those things for what I got in return.” 

His chest ached from the tension. All of the fears he’d suppressed since the day he’d sat down across from Sarah in the cafe seemed to be cracking through and spilling out. He felt like he had been hiding himself for too long now. It wasn’t fair to her. She was serious. She was making promises about a future together. She had let him close, they’d finally confessed their love for one another. What if she changed her mind now? 

“But,” he hesitated, “even though I don’t have to do those things anymore doesn’t mean I won’t. It doesn’t change what I’m capable of doing.” He swallowed hard. “It’s not hard for me to be that person. If someone came after you, I would do anything to stop them.”

“That’s why you didn’t want to tell me what happened before. You worried what I might do,” he remembered suddenly. “You do know. You did know,” he reasoned out softly. “You did know what I was capable of and what I might do,” he stated quietly, fully understanding the gravity of that realization for the first time. 

When she’d first stated it, it had made him sad to know she felt that way about him. He had been worried that his potential for violence had kept her isolated. Now, it felt like he was seeing it in an entirely different light. She had thought about what he might do if he knew someone had harmed her. She’d fully considered his capabilities and his motivations. It wasn’t an afterthought. His past wasn’t some vague idea to her. She knew and she’d thought about it. She’d thought about it before she’d confessed her secrets. Before they’d been intimate. Before she’d told him that she loved him. 

“I worried that if you ever realized. Really saw that side of me that you would change your mind about everything.” It had happened before. Aaron hadn’t realized how much he had anticipated that it would happen again. 

His voice caught in his throat again, “but you’re still here.”

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

Hearing her confess that she felt closer to him made him smile. He nodded slightly as she acknowledged the connection that had always been present between them. Even when they couldn’t quite identify what that connection was or what it meant, it had been undeniably there. From the first moments of connecting when he’d walked back into her life as Aaron, he’d always been drawn right back to her. “You said it better than I could,” he smiled at her warmly. Aaron couldn’t get enough of the way that she was looking at him. He hoped that he could make her that happy every day. 

“You’ve always supported me.” She had been there from the time he was helpless and unable to do anything for himself, or for her. She had gone above and beyond for him at every step of the way. While he may have second guessed his read on her feelings for him, that aspect had never been in question. Aaron shook his head a little, “There’s never been any doubt about that, not for a second,” Aaron assured her more seriously amongst their teasing banter. He quickly shifted from the serious right back into their playful tone as she had. “I really, really like the kind of incentives that you seem to be willing to offer. I’ll take you up on that any time.” 

He brightened even more the more she laughed. It was something he could never tire of. A boyish grin pulled across his features as he looked at her, eyes pointedly drifting up and down her entire figure. “I have a lot of ideas. More coming to mind every second.” 

“Breakfast it is then.” Her expressed desire made the decision easy. Breakfast for lunch, breakfast for dinner. Breakfast in bed at three in the afternoon, whatever made her happy. It only seemed fair for her to get everything she wanted given how dizzyingly happy she made him after all. 

Their newfound intimacy had shifted something between them. Aaron liked the confidence he felt in reaching out for her now. It felt like he could suddenly cross the invisible barrier that had once held him back. A prison that, he’d realized, was entirely of his own making. When he’d finally tuned into her, and not his own worries and fears, it had allowed him to really hear her assurances and see her responses to him. She welcomed him. Welcomed the touch, welcomed him leaning in to kiss her. It caused a bloom of warmth and happiness to radiate through his chest. 

Aaron hummed a soft note of approval against her lips as she assured him she didn’t want to go anywhere. He smiled into the kiss as she pressed her hand against his cheek. It was exciting to kiss her with a new sense of closeness and familiarity. Aaron already enjoyed kissing her. Enjoyed the way that kissing her made him feel. Somehow she managed to convey all that warmth and want and happiness to him in the smallest gestures. He was enjoying getting to learn all kinds of new things about her in this way. 

His arm that had been resting along her shoulders drew her that little bit closer as he deepened the kiss. After a few moments, he pulled away just enough to give them a chance to catch their breath. “So,” he smiled as his hand slipped along her jaw to tangle lightly in her hair. Dipping his head slightly he pressed a soft kiss to her jaw, “exactly how urgently were you hoping to have breakfast?” He pulled away just enough to catch her gaze, shooting her that mischievous grin.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Lucky for both of us, they’re my favorite kind of incentives to offer.” She teased back in the same playful way, the smile, which at the moment felt as if it was etched permanently in place, was as tender as it was teasing and seductive. The swirl of emotions was an intoxicating mix. While the feelings were faintly familiar as she’d been in the situation before. There was also this time layered beneath the span of time they’d spent getting to know each and build bonds she’d purposely avoided with romantic entanglements in the past. Instead of that fear which would creep in around the edges and make her uneasy, there was a peace and certainty she felt in its place.

In those next moments and the playful and suggestive banter continued, she felt the heat rising. It was there in his words and the way he was looking at her. While it was so easy to get lost in the heady newness between them, she could still feel the weight of their feelings for each other giving the moments so much more importance to all of it. Again she felt nothing but happiness, none of the past trepidation from worrying she might get in too deep. She instead craved that closeness and promise of more, immersing herself in the way he was looking at her.

His promise of breakfast made her smile. “Good thing about breakfast is just about anything counts, so the choices are pretty much limitless.” It felt like he’d agree to anything she asked for, though those feelings were reciprocated in that innate way they both wanted to care for the other. “I don’t think I’ve had an all night marathon like we did since I was probably back in nursing school. Those nights blurring into days and sleep was wildly off schedule. This is so much better though.” She added, the sentiment echoed in the touch of her fingers on his skin.

There was something so profoundly sweet about feeling him smile against her lips as they kissed. It settled deep within knowing the response was to her saying she didn’t want to go anywhere. It was all tangled up in that newness of the easy intimacy between them. She reveled in the fact that now he seemed to reach for her without hesitation. The worry before was real that the possibility existed where it wasn’t entirely mutual despite clear signs on both sides that it was most definitely was. It was something both of them had grappled with at different times. She was grateful for whatever had changed between them after all this time. Perhaps it was commitment on both sides that they weren’t going anywhere and time stretched out in front of them, or all the words once held back because of time constraints were coming out.

The kiss quickly became more intimate, that rush of sparks immediately enticing her in, all other thoughts evaporating as he pulled her closer. As they caught their breath, the sound of his voice so low and close drew her smile up. She heard the word and wondered what might follow, though she had an idea. The rest of the sentence elicited a soft laugh, more a breath of air really. “Not in any hurry at all, the last thing on my mind is food.” She replied softly, almost a whisper in deference to their proximity. “In fact nothing else on my mind except you and not getting out of this bed right now.” She met his familiar mischievous grin with a matching one of her own. “Something you have in mind, instead?” She teased, her tone low and sultry.

[bournelegacy]

A smile spread across his lips as she let out a breath of laughter and answered his question. Even though he was fairly certain what her response would be, there was still a thrilling anticipation that gripped him at what she might say. They traded the suggestive banter back and forth, starting to build a new layer atop their already established chemistry. Both swaying together in a dance of a new, yet somehow familiar, rhythm. 

The grin on his face only widened further when she shot back that look at him and leveled her question in such an enticing tone. “Coincidentally,” he started by pressing a single soft kiss to her lips, “I was also thinking about you and not getting out of bed.” 

Later

There was something about the second time that was even better than the first. Aaron hadn’t been tangled up in uncertainty. Corinne had quieted the cacophony of second guessing in his mind with her gentle reassurances. There was no hesitancy this time. Newness and excitement mixed now with the warmth of familiarity. Still endless aspects of the other to learn and enjoy but no longer clouded with doubt about what the other might want. 

He’d made good on his earlier promise to himself to take things slow. The previous night had been a mix of uncertain exploration and sudden intensity. Now, with the benefit of the late morning light, he could fully appreciate all the new soft curves of her body she’d now granted him access to. And he took his time to savor them all. 

When they were both satiated, he’d pulled her into his arms again. With her head against his chest, he’d held her close as they’d both caught their breath and basked in the quiet enjoyment of one another. An unexpected intensity had surprised him with the mix of emotional and physical connection with Corinne. He knew for certain that he’d never felt so close to anyone before. All of the things he’d confessed to her that he’d never spoken to anyone else had opened the door to newfound intimacy in many ways. She had heard everything the night before. All the closely held secrets about his own thoughts and mind. The soft confessions about his own feelings for her. And still, she was right there with him, it had only brought them closer. In the same way, he felt he’d gotten to know and understand her so much more. 

Even though she wasn’t looking at him, a smile was lingering on his lips as he reflected. He gently hugged her closer against his chest. Aaron tipped his head to kiss the top of her head. “So what kind of breakfast did you want to have for lunch?” 

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

Aaron could feel the mood in the room shifting. He was grateful for it. Not because he was having any trouble holding his own against the pair of assistants but because of the way that Corinne’s features had softened so considerably. The warm way she was smiling at him no longer had a hint of tension behind it in her attempt to press away the stress of the situation swirling around them. 

He in no way wanted the shift to mean that Corinne had to take the brunt of it. But truthfully, he was enjoying seeing the banter unfold between the trio. It was clear that it was all good natured teasing. They worked together, worried about each other, and particularly needed to protect Corinne. There was a deep camaraderie there that he had no intention of disrupting. 

“Too much sweetness?” Aaron raised a brow and pretended to not understand. “That wasn’t something I thought you had a problem with,” he shot Corinne a teasing smile. 

“Not with you, anyways,” Annie interjected with a slightly teasing lilt to her tone. Aaron had to take the inclusion in the genuine banter as a small win. He knew it would be a process with her, but he’d certainly take it. 

A slightly amused smile tugged at his lips as Joe correctly called Corinne out for the accuracy of his impression of her. Aaron hid the smile behind a bite of pizza. It only confirmed Aaron’s assessment of how dialled in they were to not only him but Corinne as well. 

Aaron turned his full attention back to Corinne as she smiled warmly at him. It made something flutter in his chest. Not something he was quite willing to admit out loud to her just yet but it was hard to deny as he was so hyperaware of every word and movement that both he and Corinne chose to display. The compliment made him feel warm. It was small yet meaningful given the situation. She was defending his knowledge and understanding of her. 

“What?” He screwed up his features in mock confusion. “You’re not all sweetness and light all the time? This is news to me.” 

“Then you clearly haven’t seen when the regular comes in and claims that the order is wrong every time no matter how often Cory confirms it. Can literally remake it the same way as the first time and then second time it’s magically right,” Joe chuckled as he continued the playful banter at Corinne’s expense. “You’ll definitely get something other than sweetness and light out of her then.” 

“Or when the beans get jammed in the grinder, that’s an entirely different version too,” Annie continued teasing. 

Aaron let out a soft amused chuckle as he looked at Corinne fondly. He had seen a lot of different versions of her. All of them he felt the same way about. 

He couldn’t help but laugh softly at Joe’s playfully reluctant endorsement of the more exotic pizza combination. “I don’t know, that might’ve been under duress. Sounded like you’re worried about your next pay rise,” Aaron teased. 

He smiled over at Corinne as he watched her take another sip of her cocktail. Something about the moment, the drinks and trying different things made him recall days long ago. Sitting on a couch together drinking wine and trying to find out what things Aaron actually liked or didn’t. Of course then they certainly didn’t have an audience as they tried to figure each other out. 

Aaron picked up one of the samplings of the grilled cheese pizza and took a bite. He chewed slowly and thoughtfully considered it. As he finished the bite he nodded his head in approval. “Okay, you were right, Joe. I'll take it back.” Aaron said playfully as if he was reluctant to admit that Annie and Corinne had been masterful in their creation.

“Definitely not something I expected. Maybe you’ll win me over with the non-traditional pizzas after all,” he shot Annie a warm smile before settling back on Corinne. “It’s a nice blend of the sweet and tart,” he explained before adding, “see, things don’t have to just be sweet all the time to be enjoyable.” A boyish grin tugged at his lips as he held Corinne’s gaze, calling back to their earlier banter about her. Was he openly flirting in front of the other two? He supposed they could all take the comment in whatever way they wanted. Given the looks they’d been exchanging it was likely no great surprise that there was something there. Even if Aaron couldn’t put words to exactly what that was, or truly know exactly what Corinne was thinking either. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As they were exchanging the good natured teasing, Corinne glanced over at Aaron. She picked up on his smile even as he was trying to hide it with the slice of pizza. She couldn’t help a smile of her own. She was aware of how observant her employees were, she’d have been disappointed if they weren’t, it was their job after all. If the direction of the conversation was even helping nudge things in the right direction as far as they were concerned, it was worth it to her.

Besides that, she knew how she felt about him and since he wasn’t going anywhere if she had a say in it, then it was better they got to know him sooner.

“See?” Corinne looked at Joe, the humor still playing across her features. “Aaron understands I can be firm when appropriate.”

Annie’s retort drew a small laugh from Corinne. “Given it’s been awhile since we’ve seen each other, I wouldn’t expect he needs a reminder so soon of my less than sunny responses.”

“Less than sunny.” Joe repeated. “I like that one, definitely going to use that again.”

“Go right ahead, it’s not like I can stop you.” She replied with a laugh.

Corinne glanced over at Aaron, she was still laughing at the good natured teasing. It was worth every moment compared to the earlier tensions. The fact that they were now including Aaron in on it was a good sign. Whatever had tipped the scales, she was grateful for it. Though she suspected it was a combination of several things that had occurred over the course of the evening. Most of the credit would go to Aaron, due his general nature and charm, but also his skillset. Another topic for their solo conversation later, but she suspected his training was impeccable along with the very real changes, the results undeniable compared to when she’d met him.

When Aaron joined in on the teasing banter, she felt a warmth spread through her. It wasn’t just that they all shared a similar sense of humor, it was the way the air in the room just felt lighter at least for the moment. If it was the beginning of her assistants acceptance of Aaron, she’d take it.

“Admittedly I am not above cursing out the inanimate objects that are supposed to assist in the efficient running of a coffee shop not wreak havoc with it. I don’t think that expectation is out of line.” She insisted, though the smile on her face belied the seriousness in her tone.

“Yeah, she’s pretty handy with the tools.” Annie said. “It’s when she can’t get it working on the second or third try she resorts to cursing them out.”

“General rules in baseball may apply..” She quipped. Corinne wasn’t bothered by the playful joking. In fact she was enjoying that both Annie and Joe seemed to be relishing the opportunity to tell Aaron seeming tales out of school as it were. That was just fine with her, it meant they might have been softening to him just a bit, or at least making a show of it. To what end though remained to be seen, but she welcomed the banter in place of tension. “By the third strike they’re out and if I have to call in a service person, well that’s another thing entirely.” She added with a disappointed shake of her head.

“Oh yeah, that’s when she turns on the charm when she has to call for an assist.” Annie made a tsk sound. “She brings out all the bribes at that point.”

“It is absolutely not acceptable to not be able to provide coffee related drinks in a coffee shop.” Corinne insisted with an amused smile in Aaron’s direction. “I don’t think it’s too much to expect a technician to appear asap.

“It’s hard to say no to her when she’s in one of those moods.” Annie added, grinning at Aaron.

At the same time they were getting to see a side of Aaron that would hopefully help better accept his presence in Corinne’s life.

When Aaron playfully teased about Joe’s answer being offered under duress, and then tried a bite and pretended to reluctantly agree to the compliment, Corinne dramatically put her hand over her heart and put on her best fake hurt expression.

“What? You too, handsome?” She shook her head in mock disappointment. “I can’t believe you think I’d expect them to be nice just because I pay them. Very well I might add.” She tacked on with a grin.

Then as quickly as Aaron had been playing along and teasing, he’d complimented their endeavor and added that playful line about how things didn’t have to be sweet all the time to be enjoyable. Accompanied by that mischievous smile that got to her just about every time.

Corinne’s smile was still playing around her lips as she realized it had gotten quiet. She’d known that she’d used a term of endearment with Aaron. She knew as well his words could have been taken in the same vein. She waited, wondering which one was going to go there.

“Nope.” Joe said, glancing at Annie. “Not touching that and neither are you.”

“What?” Annie asked, the very picture of innocence. “No idea what you’re talking about Joseph.”

“Seems like we might be needing dessert soon.” Corinne said, blithely ignoring the looks being exchanged.

“What were you thinking, boss?” Joe asked, a sly grin curling around his mouth.

“I was thinking, you and Annie could come up with something this evening. You’re both equally creative with the food and drink we serve here.”

She smiled over at Aaron once more. She hadn’t missed how he’d phrased the compliments. And clearly no one else had either.

“Aaron, do you have any preferences on the dessert offerings?” Joe asked.

[bournelegacy]

The smile lingered on Aaron’s face as the banter continued amongst the group. The laughter coming from Corinne did something to settle some of the concern that had arisen throughout the night. There was something about the note in her laughter that let him know that things would be alright. She was relaxed and happy and he could see it all over her face and in her body language. It helped set him at ease too. 

He occasionally glanced over at Corinne to make sure that none of the banter pushed too far. It was all in good nature and for whatever reason seemed to help align him with her assistants. A delicate balance but one that Corinne seemed comfortable with based on his assessment. He added it to the ever growing list of things to discuss when they were finally alone. 

He laughed softly as they bantered back and forth about Corinne’s threats to the coffee machines. For a moment as he watched them all, he could get a glimpse of what the future could look like if things continued to go well. The laughter, playfulness, happiness. It was striking to him as someone who never thought he could have much of a future at all. He hoped they could lay the foundation that evening to make it happen. 

“I haven’t seen the cursing out yet. I’m sure it’s just a matter of time,” he smiled at Annie and then shot a playful look over to Corinne. Time. It was a funny thing between them. They had years of knowing one another and yet the time they’d had was so little amongst it all. He hoped that was changing. 

“I think it’s hard to say no to her all the time but maybe that’s just me,” he picked up his drink to take a long sip as he made a half-hearted attempt to hide another smile. 

Between his thinly veiled comments about her and Corinne’s in return it seemed like they were flirting back and forth openly in front of her assistants. Was it flirting? Or was he simply mistaking the looks and the way her comments seemed to hit him. Aaron wasn’t entirely sure what it all meant but he found himself continuing to lean into it. He didn’t know if it was part of Corinne trying to ingratiate him into the group. Showing her clear familiarity with him and him returning it. Except Aaron knew the flirtation was genuine. Was hers? 

Handsome. 

That gave the three operatives immediate pause. Corinne continued on with her sentence as if she hadn’t realized exactly what she’d said or maybe she had and continued on anyways. 

It made his heart flutter unexpectedly. All of the other quips and looks could’ve been mistaken for any number of things. At least in his mind, it felt like he might’ve been reading his own desires into her words and actions. Handsome. That implied something different entirely. And it was clear in her assistants’ sudden stillness that it wasn’t something they’d expected from Corinne either. 

A coy smile tugged at the corners of his lips as Corinne seemed to realize what was happening in the room. He found himself searching her features trying to get a read exactly on what she might be thinking. And for the millionth time since knowing her, he wished the enhancements had come with mindreading abilities. 

He shot a look at Joe who gave a shake of his head and looked at Annie who was grinning widely. At least they both seemed deeply amused by the sudden turn of events. Aaron could only imagine what their debrief would look like in comparison to he and Corinne’s. It was challenging for him to hold in the soft laugh as Joe decided to acknowledge but pointedly dodge any direct reply and discouraged Annie from doing the same. 

“How about something with chocolate?” Aaron suggested in response to Joe’s question. “Milk chocolate, specifically,” he tipped his head to look at Corinne pointedly before glancing back at Joe, “I happen to know that someone here is a fan.” 

“How did you know that about Annie?” Joe quipped back. 

Aaron laughed softly. 

“Since when?” Annie scoffed and rolled her eyes but there was a playfulness there that hadn’t been present earlier in the night. 

“C’mon, let’s get something started. I have some ideas,” Joe declared as he pushed himself up off the seat and gestured for Annie to follow him. Aaron knew he’d judged Joe correctly early on. He got the hint from Corinne and also took it upon himself to give them all a moment to regroup. 

“We’ll get this cleaned up so we can start fresh for dessert,” Aaron offered. 

Annie hesitated for a second as if she was contemplating saying something else before deciding better of it as she pushed herself up and followed after Joe. 

Aaron watched them both as they went to collect some ingredients for dessert before turning to look at Corinne. He smiled at her, questions sparkling in his eyes that he couldn’t find the words to ask just yet. The spark of excitement that had come with her unintentional compliment still floated around in the forefront of his mind. 

“The pizza was good. Can’t wait to see what they come up with for dessert,” Aaron offered as he eased himself up. The distance between them closed slightly as he stood in the space between their seats. He took the opportunity to lightly touch her arm. It briefly satisfied the ongoing desire to reach out and check in with her that he’d denied most of the night. 

“You okay? Everything going alright?” He asked, barely a whisper. 

[jeremy-rennerr]

JEREMY RENNER as MIKE MCLUSKY MAYOR OF KINGSTOWN | 2.01 NEVER MISSED A PIGEON

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

Aaron laughed softly and shook his head a little. “We really are alike,” his eyes sparkled slightly as he looked at her in wonder. “I convince myself something is true and then I convince myself just as quickly that I’m reading into something because of my own feelings,” he shook his head slightly. It lightened something that he hadn’t realized was so heavy in his chest. While he didn’t like that she felt the same way, knowing what turmoil came with it, there was a great relief that came with the understanding he wasn’t alone in it. 

“I know it’s asking a lot given that I’m guilty of the same overthinking,” he offered with a smile, “but maybe we can both try to trust that instinct? It did feel right when you put your hand on my cheek. And it felt right to ask you to go on a date. And it felt right for you to reach out and put your hand on my arm,” the smile continued to linger on his lips. “It seems like we’ve gotten things right more than we haven’t.” 

“I didn’t want you to break the connection either,” he admitted warmly as he glanced down at her hand on his arm. Aaron moved to settle his free hand gently on top of hers, echoing back to settling her hand back on his cheek. A gentle reassurance that she hadn’t done anything he wasn’t an eager participant in. 

His heart felt like it might explode with happiness as she confessed that the idea of going on a date with him gave her butterflies. For a moment he couldn’t believe that this could actually be his life. There was a fraction of a second he waited for himself to wake up in his apartment or on her couch only to realize the entire conversation had been a fantasy. Except it wasn’t. Corinne was excited to go on a date with him. He couldn’t help the smile that lingered on his lips. 

“I trust you, Cory,” he stated softly. Aaron knew she would understand the weight of those words given their lives and history. “I don’t believe there’s anything you would actually do that could mess something up between us. I know you wouldn’t ever do something to intentionally hurt me. If you’re thinking there’s something you want to do, or say - please do it.” 

Aaron felt slightly hypocritical asking that of her given his own current hesitation. It was the second time in a day that he’d considered leaning in to kiss her but stopped himself. He reasoned with himself that he wanted it to be at a time when she was feeling more herself. He wanted it to be after he’d planned a wonderful date for them or some other time when she wasn’t unwell. It felt important for him to get that right. 

“Everything that’s felt right so far has been right. I trust you to keep trusting those instincts,” he encouraged her with a smile. “Easier said than done, I know,” he added with a soft laugh. 

“I would never want you to be sick like this again. But I’m grateful that it somehow led to this,” Aaron added with a warm smile. Whatever it was about her being unwell had undeniably dropped some barriers between them. He wished he could snap his fingers and make her well again but he was grateful for the ability to care for her in a similar way to the one she’d once cared for another version of him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She couldn’t help the fond smile that seemed etched into her features for the moment with no signs of fading anytime soon. It was there as he agreed with the assessment that they shared so many traits, including the overthinking and second guesses on their own judgment. “I’m really happy to know all those same instinctive responses felt right to both of us.” She replied. “I think I’ve spent so much time trying to convince myself that I was fine, living this way was for the best. Then you came back into my life and it seemed maybe things didn’t have to be the way I’d accepted.”

That simple gesture of moving his hand so it settled over hers made all the words and confessions just feel that much more real and right all of a sudden. “Well, now you’re just making me feel like a giddy teenager.” She said, a quick glance at their connection before she met his eyes once more. “My crush really likes me back.” She said playfully. “Seriously, I’m very happy you didn’t want to break that connection either. I never imagined being one of those people who was so oblivious to signs that everyone around them could see clear as day.” She added quietly. “Yet here we are.”

I trust you, Cory

She felt her breath hitch softly. Corinne knew the weight of those words. How hard to come by, hard to admit in both of their situations. She felt the honor of that trust. “You know I wouldn’t, just like I know the same of you, Aaron.” She remembered how she’d felt just the last few days and how much she’d let her guard down with him, the things she’d willingly asked of him. Granted her defenses were down and she didn’t have the energy to fight it or filter her thoughts the way she normally would. “I can’t begin to explain how it felt to wake up feeling safe after falling asleep in your arms.” She admitted just as softly. “Or that frankly I even admitted to being scared or any of the other simple comforts that mean so much. I don’t think I’ve ever accepted those kind of intimate gestures. It felt like allowing anything like that was letting someone get too close and that was way too much vulnerability. Yet here we are.” She said glancing down at their hands once more.

“Okay, I’ll try.” She nodded when he asked her to keep trusting her instincts. “If you agree to do the same.” Corinne knew what she was asking, the same he was of her to not second guess or worry they were doing or saying something that wasn’t returned in kind. “I know it’s easier said than put into practice.” She moved her thumb ever so slightly stroking the skin on his arm where her hand still remained in the same spot. She felt the warmth of his skin seeping into hers from point of contact both where she touched his arm and his hand covered hers. The sweet feeling of knowing they’d talked about it meaning something more. It was purposeful affection now with meaning behind it.

“Yeah, not recommending the illness, it’s definitely not been fun with the exception of my excellent and especially handsome health care provider.” She added with a shy smile. “But I do recall perhaps your offer extended beyond the duration of my illness, if that wasn’t just part of my dreams.” She teased playfully. “I am most definitely looking forward to being well and our date.”

“I’m also grateful it led to this too.” She replied softly to his comment. “Speaking of getting well, do you think we could take a look at those supplies Joe so helpfully provided and maybe see if I can talk you through capping this off between doses of the meds? So I can maybe start to move around more freely, not that I plan to push it… “ She trailed off slightly, floating the idea of staying accessible to the meds but not tied to the IV line continuously. Corinne assumed it was far easier for Joe to procure the supplies he had compared to in pill form that would require a different kind of source.

[bournelegacy]

Aaron laughed softly as she said she felt like a giddy teenager. Their playful banter sent his heart fluttering. He had missed out on this part of growing up. Sometimes, despite all his developments, skills, and abilities - he was transported back to being a young man trying to figure things out for the first time. This was certainly one of those times. He’d gotten some experience with blending in and making things seem normal. He understood the concept of flirting and dating. But experience? He’d done a lot of things in his life but this was one area he was sorely lacking in real world experience. 

“Really, really, likes you back,” he clarified with a coy smile. Aaron deeply enjoyed having that kind of effect on her. It only seemed fair given how the smallest of affections from her seemed to elicit a similar response in him too. “I do hope I can put together a better date than some of my high school competition though,” he sighed and shook his head in mock concern. 

“I can’t imagine that the high school version of you had much trouble getting your crush to like you back though,” he teased her trying to imagine what she might’ve been like back then. “Or maybe more trouble finding someone deserving of your time?” Aaron ventured with a slight raise of his eyebrows in a question, “something gave me the impression you were more study focused than boy crazy. Have I been mislead?” Aaron teased her with a grin.  

Aaron listened quietly as she talked about the trust she had shown in him since she’d gotten sick. He had found himself quietly hesitant to accept some of the change in her at face value. Not because of her but his own history. The last thing he wanted was for her to open herself up more than she’d intended because of her illness. Or because of her reliance on him. It felt like an easy way to end up in the same situation he had with Marta. Someone getting caught up in the intensity and vulnerability of survival only to realize it had been manufactured by the moment and not genuine emotion. 

He pushed away those thoughts and focused on what she was saying to him. Aaron had to choose to believe that it was different even as the fear lingered in the back of his mind. He wanted to believe Corinne and what she was saying. It made him feel warm and happy in a way he didn’t remember feeling before. She felt safe with him. That was no small feat given the lives they both lived. For her to be able to relax and sleep while she was sick and vulnerable, and she felt safe with him. He held onto those words tightly. 

“Thank you for allowing me to get that close,” his voice was soft, almost reverent for what she’d just admitted to him. Aaron couldn’t find the words to express how treasured that trust was to him or how much he intended to protect that trust with everything he had. Even though they were connected by the gentle touch on his arm and his hand on hers, he wanted to draw her closer. That realization was not missed by him. “You’ve been way past my defenses for a long time.” 

Aaron smiled when Corinne agreed to try to work on their mutual tendency for overthinking and hesitation. “Of course. I’ll be doing my best,” he gave her hand a gentle squeeze. He knew that both of them were likely to fail but he hoped that at least giving voice to the hope they could both try might encourage them. When he felt himself overthinking, he’d try to remember the way the moment felt with her as they both promised to try. He knew he had to trust the grace he entrusted Corinne would give him if he was to make a mistake. 

“Of course it extends beyond your illness,” he smiled at her, enjoying the shy look she gave him as she ventured the idea. “I insist, actually,” he grinned. “I’m looking forward to both of those things.” 

“No, you wouldn’t plan to push it at all,” he teased her playfully. While they had joked about her taking things too far, he was relatively confident that she wouldn’t. It was clear how much the idea of going to the hospital had scared her and he knew she wouldn’t want to be in that position again. “They are trying to get something more long term for you this afternoon. Given how fast you seem to be bouncing back you probably won’t need it for much longer anyways,” he ventured hopefully. The supplies had been for an emergency situation where Corinne wasn’t exactly in a state to take medications and fluids of her own volition. 

“Alright,” he said as he gently grasped her hand and brought it up to kiss the back of her hand. There he was, trying that pause in overthinking. “Let’s see if you can teach your health care assistant a few new tricks,” he offered with a smile as he reluctantly pushed himself off the bed to go rifle through the supplies Joe had brought them. 

He carried his food container out to the kitchen and washed his hands before returning with one of the bags of supplies. Aaron was fairly certain from his research what he might need but he was equally keen to let Corinne teach him too. It was a much nicer alternative to when he’d been studying alone worrying about her condition. 

“Where do we start?” He asked as he spread a few items beside her on the bed. 

[bournelegacy]

@corinnebaileyrp

[corinnebaileyrp]

@bournelegacy cont. from (x)

Aaron smiled as she seemed to accept his encouragement to continue her stories. The way she painted the picture of how she enjoyed baking and why genuinely engaged him. He could practically smell them baking in the kitchen. He couldn’t help but softly chuckle as she declared her confidence in her ability to ruin him for all future chocolate chip cookies. Aaron was certain that her assessment was right. Anything she baked would thoroughly spoil him. Though, perhaps more than just for the immediately obvious reasons. The words were right on the tip of his tongue. Next time. Except there couldn’t be a next time. There shouldn’t have even been a present time. Yet, there was. And he was determined to enjoy it even as the pressure of time slowly seemed to close in around them. “They sound delicious,” he managed to stop himself from promises he couldn’t keep. Aaron added with a smile, “I really like the soft kind too.” 

“Challenging is usually worth it when you get to enjoy something delicious afterwards,” he considered as she described her process of making macarons. “I haven’t had one. I’ll have to keep an eye out for them now. I saw them once in a baking competition show. They seemed like they could be really tough to make. The judges were using it for a knock out round,” he shared. While he might lack a lot of normal life experience, he had lived vicariously through many people in television or movies. Both as Aaron and Kenny. 

Aaron couldn’t help but smile when she suggested that he knew her well. It was made in a playful jest but it also felt true. While he might not know all the details, he felt he was coming to a much better understanding of the woman who had once been his caretaker. She was so much more than that. While she had chalked up her thoughtfulness and care to her profession, Aaron was quickly learning there was far more depth to that reality. The truth was, he wished he had more time to get to know her more than just the snapshot he was getting in a single night. 

He laughed softly at her look of mock horror and he shook his head, “no way. Not a chance. I can’t see you tolerating that kind of person for very long. And if it’s your chocolate shop, they’ll be banned for life,” he joked. 

Aaron gave her an almost shy smile as she thanked him for his sharing. He knew that it was challenging to skirt around so many topics. Particularly the topics that were so obviously staring them both in the face. She managed it with such grace and understanding. Telling her thank you for that understanding hardly felt like it covered the depth of his gratitude. 

“Hopefully I don’t overcorrect and do too much talking this time around,” he teased knowing that it was unlikely but somehow if anyone was to get him chatting it certainly was Sarah. “I am happy to share anything that I can,” he offered. Aaron tipped his head to the side and gave a small shrug of his shoulders, “I’m a little out of practice of sharing about myself. Didn’t really have a whole lot of practice before.” She had first had knowledge of that. “So thank you for sharing with me. It helps,” he offered with a warm smile. 

Aaron hesitated for a beat before deciding to add, “you make it easy to just - be Aaron.” He wasn’t entirely sure what that meant most of the time but somehow sitting with her was slowly giving him a sense of it. With her, he could shed what Outcome wanted to be and he could be a human being connecting with another human being over chocolate and wine. 

Aaron watched her as she considered the different options of the chocolates to try. “Let’s try the nougat,” he suggested as he noted her interest in wanting to give that one a try. Aaron would’ve happily followed her lead in whatever she wanted to try. She had a clear plan and thought process as she considered the flavors of them all. He hadn’t intended for the chocolates to reveal so much about themselves but it seemed it had. 

He tipped his watch ever so slightly so he could glance at the time. “Did you have dinner before you got here?” Aaron gave her an almost sheepish look. “I probably should’ve considered bringing something more substantial than chocolate and wine,” he laughed a little, “not that there’s anything wrong with surviving off both of those.” 

Aaron hadn’t been sure how long their night would last. There was part of him that had worried she might not show or that he might turn around too. The chocolate and wine would’ve been easy to leave with her and go on his way quickly. Instead, he didn’t want the night to end. And excitingly, it felt like she didn’t want it to either. 

“I don’t think it’s too late. We can probably still order something.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aaron adding that he really like the soft kind of chocolate chip cookies did nothing to dampen her urge to want to make an offer to make him some. Instead she nearly ached to say something along the lines of offering to do just that. “I don’t know why, but with exception of certain kinds meant to hard like shortbread or lace cookies, I very much prefer soft cookies in general.” She finally settled on that instead, which felt wholly inadequate and empty compared to the words she longed to say. “I’m sure there’s some kind of science to explain it.” Sarah tacked on in the continued attempt to prevent herself from blurting out the one thing that would likely make them both uncomfortable.

Later she would reflect on how easy it had been between them and try to understand how they’d seemed to form an instant bond. Though clearly there had been one established between Kenny and Sarah. She had no idea how the man in front of her had changed so profoundly. The ease she found with him was at once both new and somehow faintly familiar all at once. She couldn’t explain it, yet it inexplicably made some kind of sense. The trust that had once been established between them remained underneath, lingering unseen but informing the next layer to their relationship. It would help her understand those rueful feelings as they’d parted that it was a start to something that couldn’t continue.

“I feel the same way about doing something challenging.” Sarah replied to his comment. “It’s infinitely more satisfying to me to take on something challenging and do it successfully. There’s a sense of gratification that comes with it that doesn’t compare to anything else.” She mused. “And with cooking or baking you get to enjoy the fruits of that labor I suppose.” She resisted the urge to say she’d love to know what he thought of macarons if he did ever get to try them.

“Oh, totally banned for life, no question.” She agreed with a laugh to the idea that someone might put back a sample they didn’t like. “I mean, that should be a general rule everywhere.” Sarah joked, as if somehow the idea that she would open a chocolate shop was real. Though she found the whole discussion about it entertaining and in a pleasant way, flattering that Aaron would suggest she was qualified to do it after only a short time. Even as she knew it was silly, still the thought made her smile.

“Oh please do overcorrect.” She teased. “It still feels so one-sided.” Sarah said jokingly, trusting he wouldn’t and hoping he knew she wouldn’t ask him to. “I suppose that’s a little fair though, given when we met, it was one-sided in the opposite way. So you’re allowed to make up for it a little I guess.” Her eyes were sparkling with humor, her words meant to diffuse any concern he might have had that she had changed her mind and would start to ask questions or try get him to reveal more than he was comfortable doing. It was yet another part of their unusual dynamic, making the situation both a bit surreal and still challenging.

“Seriously though, I’m honestly glad you feel comfortable sharing. I’m really enjoying getting to know Aaron.” She replied, using his new name in a similar fashion. “It’s a unique perspective, without knowing too much about it I imagine it’s interesting to learn about yourself. The things you like and don’t. I’m honored to get to see even a small bit of that.” Even as she struggled not to ask questions that kept poking at her, Sarah tried to stay within vaguely defined boundaries as best she could. She assumed where the hard edges were drawn, it was those gray areas that were harder to stay away from, like landmines there without clearly marked signs.

She nodded at his suggestion they start with the nougat. “Seems like a safe choice.” She said. “It was hard to tell when I sliced into it really if it’s a soft or more firm version like between a snickers bar or a three musketeers type.” Sarah picked up one of the halves. She’d not tasted it yet when Aaron asked if she’d eaten dinner.

She gave him a slightly sheepish look. “I honestly didn’t think about it.” She admitted. “No, I didn’t. I’d been focused on trying to make it on time after work. Guess I was a bit distracted with all that had happened today.” The fondness was evident in both her smile and voice. “It was the best kind of surprise.”

“No, nothing wrong with either, though after a while I start to crave savory too.” She said when he joked about surviving on chocolate and wine. “We can definitely order something if you’d like to, do you have a particular craving?” She asked. “Unless you’re good with our current offering.” She jokingly lifted the piece of chocolate still held in her fingers. “I think though I’ll probably hit a wall on the sweet any minute.”

[bournelegacy]

“Then I will do my best to overcorrect,” he joked back with her. It seemed like a delicate dance they’d worked out between themselves. They both understood the limitations but yet did their best to work their way to sway around them whilst not having to acknowledge them at every turn. Aaron deeply appreciated the way she did that for him. “I hope you know what that means though?” A hint of amusement lingered on his lips as he continued, “you’re going to be tormented by a lot of useless trivia and movie references.” 

Aaron spent a remarkable amount of time traveling coupled with preparing for missions in lonely hotel rooms. Sometimes those hours beyond the training and study were filled with late night reruns of shows he’d never seen in languages he had newly learned or living vicariously through others people watching in cafes around the world. He was a man with a lot of free time and yet very little life experience beyond the scope of his role with Outcome. 

He quieted momentarily as she acknowledged him. Aaron found himself enjoying the way his name sounded when she said it. He was grateful she’d asked for it and he’d decided to give it to her and not some other alias. He could’ve just been Kenny to her forever but something had made him want her to know who he was now too. Dangerous, but undeniable. 

“Interesting is one word for it,” he considered with a smile. There had definitely been many challenging moments as he tried to balance the demands of his new life in Outcome and also trying to enjoy whatever moments of life he could carve out for himself. “You make it easy to feel comfortable,” he added softly, “and I have to say it’s a lot more fun trying all this out with someone else. Especially someone who is so knowledgeable on the topic,” Aaron gestured a little to the chocolates. But it was so much more than just that. It felt like he was coming on too strong if he continued to pay her endless compliments, no matter how genuine they were or how much he wanted to. 

A slight smile tugged at the corners of his lips as she paused to consider dinner. Something about the way she referred to her rush to get to him on time made his stomach do a little flip. The little flutter in his heart only continued with the way she looked at him. He did his best to try to recover, furrowing his brow slightly in mock confusion. “Why? What happened today that would’ve had you distracted?” It was only a few beats before the smile spread across his lips. 

Admittedly, he had been focused on the location being safe and then the wine and chocolate and making sure he looked presentable for her. Dinner had only vaguely crossed his mind and been discounted temporarily given the uncertainty of how things could’ve gone. 

“Wouldn’t want you to hit the wall on the sweets. I can’t be the one responsible for ruining chocolate and sweets for you. That’s later for your chocolate shop,” he teased her. 

“I’ll have just about anything,” he offered but didn’t want to leave her with all the decisions. “How does pizza sound? I do have a favor to ask though,” he gave an almost sheepish smile. Aaron patted his pockets as if he was missing something, “I didn’t bring my phone. If you wouldn’t mind ordering?” Aaron didn’t need one more tracking device in his life. He wasn’t sure how closely he was observed given he’d just gone for a medical but it wasn’t an additional risk he wanted to take. There were enough risks in the mix already. He did, however, bring his wallet and fully intended to pay for whatever dinner choice they made. 

In another life he would’ve suggested they go for a walk or a drive to go get something themselves. But he was cautious of being out in public together. It felt entirely too close to people who might recognize either of them. Aaron knew it was likely paranoia beyond what was reasonable but the risk was too high to take the chance. 

“If you’ve got something else you’d like more or know somewhere that delivers nearby. I’m open to anything you’d like.”