you could’ve been more tactful. / heartridge.
he’s dressed for patrol, bow and quiver on his back, seraph blade holstered at his thigh. the alert had come through on his phone less than ten paces from the front doors, and he’d had half an inclination to ignore it. going out on assignment without his parabatai was irksome enough; contending with more bureaucracy was the last thing he needed. the exasperation in the roll of his eyes is enough to get izzy’s attention.
“ don’t tell me. heartridge? ”
“ wants to see me before we head out. ”
“ who knows. if he doesn’t have a reason to get on my case, i’m sure he’ll think of one. go ahead, ” alec nods at the doors and pockets his phone. “ i’ll catch up. ”
izzy shakes her head. “ i’ll wait. just get it over with. ”
“ i’d rather spend the next three weeks on ichor duty. ”
“ alec. ” the admonishment is gentle. “ go. ”
with a reluctance that he doesn’t bother hiding, he backtracks through the ops center and hangs a left down the corridor to heartridge’s office. the door is open, but he pauses on the threshold; there’s a suitcase on the leather sofa and a box of belongings on the desktop. heartridge glances at him from behind the desk, almost expressionless.
“ — you requested to see me? ”
“ yes. shut the door, please. ”
brow furrowed, alec does as instructed. he measures a pair of wary strides further into the room, hands clasped behind him at the wrist. he’s used to a certain level of shared tension, of mutual dislike, with the institute’s acting head; he’s been accustomed to it since the day they’d met, but this feels different.
his eyes flicker to the box. when he looks up again, heartridge is watching him with the same impassivity.
“ just ask, mr. lightwood, ” he says dryly. “ the suspense is probably killing you. ”
“ okay. ” a beat. “ are you going somewhere? ”
one of the desk drawers is abruptly closed. something else is dropped into the box. “ alicante. the clave has decided that my qualifications would be put to better use elsewhere. ”
“ in other words, they demoted you. ”
“ reassigned, ” he snaps. “ and you could have been more tactful. ”
“ because diplomacy is supposed to be one of your skills, and i’ve yet to see a real demonstration of — ”
“ no, ” alec interrupts, “ i mean, why were you reassigned? ”
his jaw works at the hinge. eye contact is avoided for a moment as he gathers the last few items at hand: a black USB cord, a tablet that’s slid into its case, a fountain pen that he tucks into the breast pocket of his suit. his stele, too, is tucked away. everything else is packed. the box is pushed aside and he sits down, palms smoothing over the surface of the desk before he finally looks at alec again.
no small amount of pride was swallowed during that whole process. alec has to give credit where it’s due.
“ i was offered this position on a provisional basis, as you’re aware. the clave wanted results. they wanted something definitive, something irrefutable, and they wanted it quickly with as few casualties as possible. no official arrests have been made, and four shadowhunters have died on my watch. you’re smart. piece it together. ”
alec’s frown deepens. “ you know as well as i do, it’s not that simple. they’re asking for the impossible. most of us went into this investigation blind, and when jace and i broke protocol to find out the truth, we were almost charged with treason for it. they can’t seriously think — ”
“ of course they can. we all have our ranks and our titles, mr. lightwood, but the fact of the matter is, we must each be held accountable. i had my orders. i was given a job to do, and i failed to do it. the law is hard but it is the law. ”
“ you say those words enough and they start to lose their meaning. ”
“ that, alec, ” heartridge says, standing up with a long exhale, “ is a very dangerous road to venture down. ”
silence envelopes the room except for the soft crack and split of wood from the fireplace. where he’d expected vitriol, there’s only a quiet, bitter dejection, and he almost feels the pull of something sympathetic. i had my orders. i was given a job to do. the law is hard, but it’s the law. it’s difficult to begrudge someone the same list of justifications he’s been hearing, and using, for most of his life.
“ why are you telling me this? ” he asks, and the uncertainty is genuine. it makes the corner of heartridge’s mouth tic slightly and without amusement.
“ i thought you’d be quicker on the uptake. as per the terms of my reassignment, i was tasked with choosing a successor to take my place. you were the acting head of this institute before — i see no reason why you shouldn’t be again. unless, of course, you can give me one? ”
“ ... what? ” it doesn’t track. he might have taken it for a joke, if he’d thought the man possessed even the most vague sense of humor. he’s met only with raised eyebrows as he tries to navigate a response. “ but, i thought — after what i said, what i did, i didn’t expect them to just — ”
“ your insubordination hasn’t been overlooked, and nor have your ... personal connections. the inquisitor has been instructed to make sure that your every move is watched very closely, should you choose to accept. you have an opportunity here, mr. lightwood. one that isn’t given lightly. i wouldn’t suggest wasting it. ”
“ no, i — ” alec steadies himself with a breath, more taken aback than he wants to admit. “ i won’t. ”
“ fine. i’ll make it official in the morning with a formal announcement. ”
he nods tightly. then, because it seems like the right thing to amend, “ thank you. ”
heartridge gives him a long, wordless appraisal. “ much as i’m loath to say it, i admire you. this unwillingness to compromise your own principles, even at the cost of your career, is — unusual. free thinking doesn’t go over well with our superiors. i don’t have to tell you that. ”
it sounds like more of a warning than a reproach, or a threat. alec isn’t certain how to navigate that, either.
a moment later, he’s spared the trouble. heartridge’s voice goes back to dry and businesslike, his expression impersonal, the nod returned as a curt dip of his chin.
“ carry on with your patrols tonight as planned, ” he says tonelessly. “ you’re dismissed. ”
