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[pettydemon]

[fuckyeahnozuka]

Justin Nozuka's Resurgence

In a sit-down interview with Elle, Justin Nozuka shares the tales behind his inspirations, music and future plans.

Nozuka is planning on releasing his new and long-awaited album this summer. The contrast between his last one, Ulysees, and his current record is something he feels defines his growth as a musician.

“The third album [Ulysees] that I put out in 2014 is a lot more experimental. It’s a bit of a curve-ball I suppose. The new record that I just finished is my present sound, which is [an] acoustic, folk-rock-roll sort of a sound.”

Not only did Ulysees give Nozuka a chance to experiment, but it was also something he felt inclined to create, having no idea what the future would hold following its release.

“When I was making Ulysees, in my mind I was potentially making the last record I’d ever make. That record was extremely scary, because I was doing something so different and kind of saying ‘F*** you’ to my whole team in a way (laughs). Maybe not my whole team, but at least my whole situation. But it was something I had to do.”

[briannaslist]

Spider-Man: Homecoming

Marvel as Sony attempts to save their film company with one movie. A “gamble” that pays off because it doesn’t matter what anyone says – if you have even the slightest interest in this movie, you’re going to see it. It’s Spider-Man. Even when people didn’t like what the franchise was doing, they still saw it in overwhelming numbers. And that surprises nobody.

Now, I should be upfront – I am super biased. I love Spider-Man; he’s my favorite superhero. This movie was no exception to my love, though I will try to keep it toned down.

Pros:

·The movie is fun. It’s humorous, many of the characters are endearing, it’s bright and colorful. It’s just a very enjoyable experience.

·Tom Holland is delightful and does an excellent job. He’s very believable. I often saw his portrayal post-Civil War as a great Peter Parker and Spider-Man; I fully agree with that sentiment. He delivers the Spider-Man quips very well and he really feels like this adorable 15-year-old who just wants to do good.

·The rest of the cast, who thankfully don’t overshadow the main character. The younger cast do feel like teenagers. They look, talk, and act like teenagers. Shoutout to Jacob Batalon who plays best friend Ned for his performance as well.

·Everything feels grounded: The stakes are important, but they’re not world-ending. It’s a realistic fight that Peter is engaging in. No wars, no beam to the sky, just a simple matter of needing to stop something bad that’s happening. Also, Spider-Man is powerful, but there are things he can’t do. It makes him feel more human.

Cons

·Why are movies so long? Don’t get me wrong, give me a good amount of content, considering movies aren’t cheap, but these runtimes are getting a bit out of hand. Sometimes you’re just aware that you’ve been sitting for a while.

·The score. The music just felt like it wasn’t…enough. I don’t know the best way to fully describe it. It has a superhero movie feel, but not in the way that makes you feel hyped up or interested. It’s as if something is missing; not quite hollow, but on the borderline.

·The opening does nothing for me. I understood the importance of it, and why they put that set up in the beginning, but I still found myself wondering when the real movie would start. Luckily, we get that new, fancy Marvel opening following that, and it restores the excitement.

·Super frustrating double-meaning theme where they keep emphasizing that Peter is inexperienced, yet they don’t communicate with him and act as though he should have known and understood how some things were developing. How about just talking to him?

Those are all just highlights, but there are some other observations that stuck with me. My biggest concern going into this movie was the way they advertised certain characters being in it. Yes, I’m primarily talking about the prominence of Tony Stark. He was in the movie a fair amount, but it didn’t take away from Peter’s story. What I mean is, the Spider-Man movie felt like it was actually about Spider-Man. Some others heavily advertised feel like they’re practically not in the movie.

Some of the jokes felt a little forced; at times Spider-Man would joke around and it felt a little try-hard and almost annoying. But that may have been intentional because of his age. Also, how is it that Peter and his friend, Ned, are deemed as losers for liking Star Wars collectables at a math and technology school?  Come on, there’s a big cross-section there.

All in all, good, solid movie. I like what they did with Peter’s story. He’s just trying to figure out his identity and where he fits in with world of heroes. It was fun and interesting and I can’t wait to see what they do with him next.

And yes, there is a post-credits scene and a post-post credits scene.

[briannaslist]

Baby Driver

A Recap

It’s been quite some time since I’ve done a movie review, but I feel it would be doing a disservice to Baby Driver if I didn’t say anything.

This is the first time in a little while that I’ve gone into a movie blind. My mom and I were trying to figure out some Independence Day, and we thought maybe we’d go to the movies. But then what do we see? We couldn’t decide on a movie we both wanted to see that would justify movie prices. I heard about some buzz on Baby Driver.

So, I went in, no trailers, no synopsis, no true review. Just – people seem positive, the cast is made up of talented actors, and Ansel Elgort is cute. I didn’t even have any real expectations because I didn’t know anything about it.

The first thing you need to know is that soundtrack is really the main character. The narrative centers on it, moves with it, frames it. It’s eclectic, it always fits, it’s always interesting. Beyond that, the movie is very grounded, when it could be over-the-top and flashy. The actors bring a lot of interest to their characters and they play off each other well. A few of the roles are surprising, simply because I haven’t seen some of them in roles like that. The whole movie tends to subvert expectations, which means it’s never dull. And, for me, the setting was recognizable, so that was like a viewer bonus. Additional bonus, this is another recent movie with opening credits; a feature that I didn’t realize I was missing until they brought it back.

If you’re wondering what it’s about, I’ll give a brief synopsis. If you’d rather go in with minimal information like I did, skip this paragraph. The movie follows Baby, a getaway driver, who lives life with a near-constant soundtrack. He’s young, and ridiculously good at his job. While very quiet and little strange, he doesn’t cause any trouble. Sure, he’s a criminal, but, he’s also a guy with a troubled past, who is just trying to correct mistakes and improve his life. He has to reconcile his morals with his dangerous line of work, while trying his hardest to get out of it.

[If you were skipping this paragraph, you can join again.]

Now, the movie isn’t without fault. The run time is a bit too long. It doesn’t drag, but it can seem like it’s stalling at times. However, the pacing is still borderline perfect (in large part due to the impact of the soundtrack) so it still moves and flows, even at times when it slows a little. Certain character behaviors or expectations seem a little odd, like they were put in for the narrative, leading to feeling a bit removed from the movie. At times, it does make you wonder if they just had to sacrifice sensible behavior for the sake of the movie progressing. Thankfully, that isn’t a frequent occurrence. Fair warning, there are violent sequences, but it’s not violent like say, Kingsman: The Secret Service. So, it’s there, but it’s not terribly heavy.

All in all, it was very enjoyable. I saw the movie at 11am and it was still on my mind hours later. All the notes seemed to hit without a hitch. It’s just one of those movies that feels…different.

[briannaslist]

Til Death Do Us Part (Series Finale)

A Pretty Little Liars Recap

We get a weird opening that’s not necessary, so we’ll just skip it. If you thought you were going to get a satisfactory answer, then you can turn back now. AD is someone we have never met; someone we didn’t even know existed. The worst twist and reveal possible, to the point that it’s taken about a week before I could even talk about it. It’s an extended finale, an hour and a half without commercials, yet nothing happened until the last 30 minutes.

It was Spencer’s evil twin. We can just stop right here.

We get a one-year time jump: Aria and Ezra are on a movie set because their book may become a movie. Which is very early for that story to be optioned for a film. Meanwhile, Ali and Emily are the proud mothers of twin girls – Lily and Grace. Spencer is getting along with her sister Melissa for a change; Toby arrives, much to Spencer’s surprise, and they’re clearly happy to see each other, complete with lingering looks. Because all the couples must exist at the end.

Somehow Addison is still a thing and she’s still as annoying as ever. The girl is still being a bully to everyone and she and her friends are likely bullying a deaf girl, but at least we get Jenna telling her that she may be blind, but she can smell a bitch from a mile away. We should just end the episode right there. Meanwhile Hanna and Caleb are having issues because Hanna is letting Mona come live with them; a decision she made without consulting Caleb.

Everyone gets together at the renovated Lost Woods Resort for a joint bachelor/bachelorette party. Apparently, Ezra has no other friends because his guests are all the guys we already know. Spencer notices Hanna making passive aggressive remarks to Caleb. They’re being watched by Mona who is in a Melissa mask. There’s no significance in her wearing the mask. I wonder if Mona still spied while everyone broke off to have sex. Except Spencer and Toby, who just leave to play Scrabble.

Hanna’s concern is getting pregnant despite only being married for a year and under dire circumstances. Her fashion line is just starting to take off, Caleb sold some software to Lucas, and they’re having problems. Why would you need to rush a pregnancy? Get yourselves a little more together.

For whatever reason, they decide that this is a good time to add even more drama even though we have a limited time frame. Aria gets a third opinion from a professional and has it confirmed that she cannot have children; Ezra is supportive and tells her there are other options and he’s there for her, but he’s a bit offended that she never told him earlier because she was afraid he would leave. All of this is dragged out for far too long.

Caleb is unnecessarily hostile to Mona when they come home; just gives her this look and doesn’t even greet her. Like it’s her fault she’s mentally ill and was harassed into having a psychological break. This behavior from the guy who, just one episode ago, said “poor Mona” because of her circumstances.

Hanna thought it was appropriate to bring Mona to the rehearsal dinner without asking Aria or Ezra for permission. Caleb didn’t want to leave Mona home alone and Hanna didn’t know what to do. Ali’s shock about it is probably the most Alison thing we’ve seen in two seasons and it lasts less than ten seconds. Hanna wants them to just pretend for one night that they’re all friends and to just treat Mona like a person.  

I’m still lost on how everyone is still so sour toward Mona after all she’s done for them and how close she’s been kind to them. Like they try to use the excuse of some of the stuff she did like “trying to kill Hanna”. I’m not saying we should be super happy about that, but Emily dated someone who tried to drown her, so I’m not seeing much of a difference. This and the episodes before seemed like it was setting up everyone else finally reconciling with Mona and ending with the six of them at least being friendly. But that doesn’t happen.

For whatever reason, they had to throw in Ezra talking to Byron and Byron giving him his approval for marrying Aria. I guess they had to add it since many people are very…uneasy about this relationship. And then they spent a good portion of these last episodes with Ezra being weird about Nicole. Also an inconsequential and unneeded storyline in the end.

We get treated to the moms being entertaining (except Pam, who’s being sketchy talking to Ali). The other moms are cool though. They also remembered that Toby and Emily are friends (and have been this whole time) and they have Toby asking when he’ll get to meet the kids. But for every sweet moment like this, there’s the rest of the show, so. Some Addison drama is thrown in here too, but no one gives a shit.

Emily is in a mood because she saw Ali and Pam acting weird at the party. Emily’s stubbornness leads to a reveal that Pam was giving Ali Emily’s grandmother’s ring. Because Ali had a big thing planned, but now that the surprise is ruined, the proposal is right at this moment.

Hanna and Caleb finally talk like rational adults and Hanna acknowledges that she’s been dismissive of Caleb’s feelings and she’s going to tell Mona that things won’t work out with her living there. They kiss and Caleb asks her if she wants to make a baby. Right there, on the couch, when you still have a house guest though? Hopefully Mona doesn’t need a glass of water any time soon.

Oh, and Spencer goes to Toby’s room to have sex with him too because they weren’t part of the earlier sex sequence. There we go, all the couples are back. Everyone should be totally satisfied with that.

Then the build up to something actually happening – Spencer is at home and hears music. She goes to her living room only to get knocked out by Mona. When she wakes up, she thinks she’s looking in a mirror; however, it’s a window. And now Spencer knows that she has an evil twin. An evil twin who kidnapped her after getting Mary out of prison somehow.

This evil twin is a walking exposition machine, so may as well address everything all at once, like she does every time she’s on screen:

Her name is Alex Drake – Hence the A.D. thing. Wren saw her working in a bar in London and thought she was Spencer messing with him at first. Probably because that “accent” is horrendous. So anyway, Wren showed her a picture of Spencer and he called, of all people, Charlotte to tell her about Alex. He didn’t call Spencer or Melissa, hell even Peter Hastings would make more sense, than calling Charlotte.

Alex has been impersonating Spencer for a while now. She’s the one who gave Toby that strange goodbye kiss before he left to have his life with Yvonne; she’s the one who slept with him like a week after his wife died. She was in the airport arguing with Wren.

But why did Alex do all this? For basically no reason. She was mad because the girls “took Charlotte from her” and Spencer had an alright life with people who cared about her and that upset Alex? So, she decided she just needed to take over Spencer’s life permanently. She has Wren shoot her in the shoulder, in the same spot Spencer was shot; and Wren went along with it because he loves her… But then Wren was in the way of her becoming Spencer because he saw her as “Alex”, so she killed him and had his ashes turned into a diamond, which she wears as a necklace so he’s always nearby. Let’s just – let’s wrap this up.

Alex takes Spencer’s place and goes to get ready for Aria’s wedding. Aria’s wedding dress is about as awful as the “Cockney British accent”, so we’re lucky that Ezra sent a text saying he wasn’t going to come and everyone just took it at face value despite everything that has happened to them in the past. Caleb looks into it, only to find that Ezra never used any credit cards or moved his car. Because Alex kidnapped him when he saw her acting weird at The Radley. All of which could have been avoided had she just played coy and said she spent the night with Toby.

Meanwhile, Mary hops into the exposition machine to tell Spencer more stupid things that don’t make any sense. Stuff like, the nurse gave Spencer to Peter and he walked off, only for the doctor and nurse to be surprised by a second child. Yes, apparently, the entire time Mary was in their care, they never gave her an ultrasound. And Peter Hastings did not hear the doctor yelling about a second baby just moments later. Also all doctors in Rosewood are corrupt because he convinced her to sell the baby to a wealthy couple for a cut of the profits. And then the couple decided they didn’t want Alex, probably because she was unbearably annoying, even then, so they gave her to an orphanage and took back their name to erase all association with her. Several years later Alex ran away. And all of this while Spencer cries because we should…. feel bad? None of this justifies anything that Alex has done. Mary goes in to comfort Spencer, but she exits quickly and locks the electronic lock. But then they show us that Spencer stole a bobby pin from Mary’s hair. To pick the electronic lock.

Spencer soon learns that Ezra when he wakes up in a room across from her. She’s trying to pick the lock – no. Why is it electronic if it’s a pad lock? But then Alex comes in for a little more exposition. Like to not explain why Sara Harvey or Sydney were important; they weren’t. Jenna’s involvement was because she knew Charlotte had a sister and she wanted another chance as being able to see. So, Alex paid for surgery in exchange for a little help. Oh, and Noel Khan was helping Jenna because she was using Noel’s help to find the mysterious sister. Also, Alex only let us in on this, but Wren is the father for Ali and Emily’s kids. I’m assuming they never find that last part out. Anyway, there you go. “Answers”.

The next day, Alex goes to the ranch for the date with Toby. Because Alex is obsessed with Toby being in love with her. However, the shy horse reacts badly to her because she isn’t Spencer. And later when Spencer calls her mom a rock star in front of Jenna and Jenna sniffs out a different perfume, Jenna is clued in to Spencer not being Spencer. Jenna calls Toby to tell his as much. And Toby finds this convincing and goes to the others with one other piece of evidence – a book Spencer gave him is empty.

Everyone is skeptical for about three seconds before realizing there’s about ten minutes left and they have to just go with it. Meanwhile Mona watches all this unfold on her computer and calls Alex, who she also just learned about, and tells her to go to plan B. Then she goes to the others and tells them that Wren came to Welby to kill her, but she convinced him that she could get Mary out of prison. So, that happened, and she knows where Alex is; the house that Toby built.

Meanwhile, Spencer picked the lock and got Ezra out and they’re trying to find a way out. While Alex is hunting them down with an ax. Everyone else gets there and they have to play the “which one is real” game and the mystery is solved by true love. Then a police officer comes in and Mona says that she called the police.

Aria found a better wedding dress and she and Ezra get married. Before she leaves for her honeymoon, the girls get together again. Toby is sticking around and he’s gonna be working with Jason (who is not in the episode). It’s early to share, but Hanna is pregnant and Aria says she and Ezra are meeting with an adoption agency when they get back. Everyone is happy I guess, despite the others barely being in the episode, and they all hug.

Then we see Mona in France, working in a doll shop. She kisses her handsome boyfriend, the cop who arrested Mary and Alex, and then she goes downstairs to reveal that she has Mary and Alex captive. How she managed to get overseas with two unwilling people, one of whom is a fugitive, is beyond me, but I’ve tired of thinking of this show.

It would have been nice to end the episode right there with Mona, but they decide to do a repeat of “that night” with Addison’s friends; this time it’s Addison who’s missing. Good.

[briannaslist]

Farewell My Lovely

A Pretty Little Liars Recap (7x19)

If you thought we were going to get answers about who’s antagonizing the girls in the penultimate episode, you were wrong. There are answers, just none to the questions you’ve been asking. In other words – what’s the point?

Aria is approached by a police officer, while she has a dead body in the trunk. She told him the trunk got stuck and her keys are inside, but a friend is coming to help. The officer is trying to help and she’s trying to get him to leave. The officer gets the trunk open but turns away when something comes in on the radio. Aria reaches in and quickly grabs her keys.

Everyone else, including Ezra, got together without Aria. Caleb tells them what they found with Mona and the others outright say that means Mona is AD. So, you can rule out Mona. Spencer says they need to call the cops to tell them what Mona’s been doing. Despite it making sense that Mona would have the game since she’s investigating it.

Ezra is trying to call Aria, but he can’t reach her. He tells the others and then is like, “Actually, you know what, screw all of you for cutting her off for making a basic mistake and doing what any of you would have done.” At least Ezra’s not being a hypocritical jerk to people he’s supposed to care about. I like that he called them out. He leaves to go find Aria.

Caleb goes after Ezra to immediately apologize. Out of all the people in that room, Caleb is the least awful. He may be the least awful on the whole show. Ezra tells Caleb that he still can’t get in touch with Toby, so he’s going to look for Aria himself. Caleb offers him some help.

Aria’s driving along, talking to the dead body in her trunk, and decides that she’ll just drive to the police station and show them the body. Because she should go to prison for not killing someone and being mean to her friends.

Mona comes home and sees a note where the board game used to be. It says, “Time for pie. Be there.” Mona leaves and Caleb and Hanna see her go. Hanna says they need to follow her.

Meanwhile, Spencer goes to see Mary. Mary tells her that she put the Lost Woods Resort in Spencer and Ali’s names to help with legal fees and whatnot. I doubt it’ll help that much; no one seems to stay there. She says that she wishes she could do more.

Alison and Emily went home. Ali says that Ezra was right and that they should be looking for Aria. But Emily says that they’re safer there. Ali’s worried about what happens to the baby if they get arrested. Then, more of the same with Em promising to protect Ali from circumstances beyond her control. Meanwhile, looks like AD loosened a hose in their house to cause a gas leak.

And because Emison is very annoying and the aftermath of this gas leak is really stupid, let’s just get that out of the way now. You know that flashforward from like a year or two ago, where the girls rush into Alison’s classroom telling her “he’s coming for her” and everyone is panicked? Yeah – that’s just a dream that Emily’s having due to the gas leak. It would have been so much better if they let that thread hang. They do it all the time and decide to throw this in when it serves no purpose. Then Emily wakes up on the floor and wakes Ali up. Ali’s more shocked that they both fell asleep instead of any concern about Emily passing out on the floor. Don’t know why it’s so shocking that they would fall asleep at the same time. It’s like four in the morning. Then they hear the board game playing a loop of Ali at the kissing rock saying “We don’t have much time.” A video from forever ago. Emily turns it off and then someone knocks on the door.

They never address the gas again. AD has snuck the board game into their houses before; using the gas was completely unnecessary. In fact, when they loosened the hose, they could have just brought the game in. We just never talk about it again, despite how crazy dangerous that is.

Aria is stopped across the police station by Ezra. Caleb helped find Aria by tracking the transmitter in Aria’s car. She tells him that she’s trying to make things better with her friends and he says he’s not interested in the sacrifices she’s trying to make for her “friends”. I’m with you Ezra; they’re terrible. He also says it’s silly because she’s in the clear. Then Aria tells him the body is in the trunk.

They go home because they know better than to talk about these things in open areas. He suggests they just leave town, but Aria says that she can’t leave her friends. Ezra relents and says they’ll just scoop up the others and all leave Tanner’s jurisdiction to at least buy some time. But first they need to get rid of the body. They walk back outside to Aria’s car, only to see that the trunk is open and the body is gone.

What’s more concerning is that Aria parks on the street. Someone just went up to some street parking to put a body in a trunk and then later took it away, and no one saw or heard this? It’s not an active time of day, but still.

Caleb and Hanna followed Mona to a diner, where she’s clearly waiting for someone. Hanna notices that Mona looks nervous. Spencer joins them, which I acknowledge is a poor choice in words. They all argue about whether they should go in. Hanna says they already know she’s waiting for Charlotte and Caleb’s like, “Well she’s not gonna show up now”. Hanna says that’s where Mona was going to meet Charlotte before. Beyond that, she doesn’t think Mona is AD and that she only took the game to help them. Spencer interjects and says “You guys are fighting like you’re married or something.” It’s an incredibly forced line and I think Troian knew that because she delivered it as stiff as possible. takes Hanna to the side to tell her what happened with Mary.

When Hanna and Spencer turn back, they see that Caleb has gone into the diner. This is one of the better scenes in the episode. Mona looks scared of Caleb when he walks in and Caleb seems threatening. He sits down across from her, asking her if she likes her pie. Then he even asks if he can try it and slowly takes a bite, staring her down. But then he asks her who she’s waiting for and all hopes are shattered. It honestly looked like it could have been Caleb as the mastermind. He tells her she’s going with them to the police so she can tell them everything she’s been doing; but first they’re gonna stop for the game. Mona tells him that someone stole it and that someone is always stealing the game from her. The check comes and Mona reads it, getting up to leave. She sees Spencer and Hanna come in and she goes running into the bathroom. They all follow her, but she’s gone.

Mona left the check in the bathroom; it said, “Leave now”. Then they find out that the wall in the bathroom blocks a secret entrance to a tunnel because of course it does. They agree to have Caleb and Spencer go into the tunnel while Hanna goes back to tell the others.

Meanwhile, Detective Tanner finally has enough to have arrest warrants approved for all five girls.

In the tunnel, Caleb tells Spencer what Mona said. He doesn’t think she’s AD and even says “Poor Mona”. Only Caleb and Hanna show actual empathy for Mona. While they’re down there, Caleb also tells Spencer that he and Hanna got married that night. Spencer is very happy for them and congratulates him. He says part of him wants to apologize to her though and Spencer says not to apologize for being with her and to never forget it, because she won’t. Very weird statement to make in the context of your ex being married to your best friend. Also, not a conversation we have time for.

It was Aria knocking on Emison’s door earlier. Now they’re all in the car with Ezra. No one is answering their phone now. Alison decides to be an adult and apologizes to Aria for their mean and juvenile behavior. But Aria understands and says they panicked, which can make people go back to their old behavior. Foreshadowing. They stop in a line of cars at a blockade. Ezra decides they don’t have time for this and just backs up and drives off. And no police notice because they’re terrible at their jobs.

Hanna is walking by the church steeple and sees flower petals falling from the top. For whatever reason, she takes that as an invitation to go up there by herself. To the tower where people keep dying. When Hanna gets to the top, she sees Mona, dressed in her “Loser Mona” clothes. She’s holding flowers. But when did Mona have time to change her clothes, put her hair in pigtails, and change her makeup? That’s the real mystery.

Hanna asks Mona why she’s there and Mona says, “Waiting for you, Charlotte.” Let’s do a flashback. Mona did meet Charlotte there. Mona knows that Charlotte has been playing everyone the past five years and refuses to let Charlotte hurt anyone anymore. Charlotte’s very dismissive and opens the door to the steeple to look out at the town that she says she hates. Her plan is to be even worse than before. Terrible plan as you’d be the first suspect Charlotte. Just move.

Mona says that she’s not going to let Charlotte hurt her friends. Geez, poor Mona indeed. Those girls consistently treat her badly and she still calls them friends. Charlotte decides to antagonize her and stands at the open doorway at the top of the tower with her back turned. Luckily there’s a giant screwdriver that Mona notices. So, Mona puts the screwdriver to Charlotte’s back and tells her to jump or she’ll push her.

But then we flash back to the present day, where Mona is grabbing Hanna, saying she’s not getting fooled again. She tries to push Hanna out, but Caleb and Spencer run in. Guess that’s where the convenient tunnel led. They separate Hanna and Mona and Hanna tells them that Mona killed Charlotte.

They all walk out and Hanna says they’re not taking Mona to the police. When they walk up to their car, they see two puzzle pieces hanging off it. They group up with the others.

Ali asks why Mona is dressed that way and Spencer said she retreated to a safe place, before all this happened. Remember Aria’s foreshadowing? Connection; they got one. But just the one. Aria then suggests that they call Dr. Sullivan and have her explain what’s happening with Mona to the police. Caleb and Ezra stay behind to watch over Mona, while the girls go to Ali’s house to put the last pieces.

This puzzle looks like nothing. They use the phone to scan the puzzle and then it does some augmented reality to show Ali’s Aunt Carol’s house. All of this is unnecessary. The grand prize is the body. The girls go there to see a gravestone for “Charles” and they’re about to dig up the grave when Aria stops them and says the most rational thing ever said on this show: If they want to stop the crazy, they need to stop being crazy. They’re not going to dig up the grave.

As they start walking away, Tanner shows up with way more police than those employed in Rosewood and digging equipment. They get brought to the police station and are in a holding room. Spencer says they may as well tell the truth…like they should have done right from the beginning.

A two-way mirror is uncovered and the girls get to see Tanner question Mary. Mary admits to everything: killing Archer Dunhill; killing her sister; arranging it to look like Archer was still alive. She gives all these details that fit with the evidence and Tanner tells her to read over her statement and correct any mistakes. She comes back into the room with the girls.

Tanner tells them they’re free to go and apologizes for any inconvenience. She says the DA likes things wrapped up in nice, bold lines; she can give him that or she can give him a box of loose ends that lead nowhere. She does think Mary killed Jessica and says that’s enough to send her away where she can’t hurt anyone else. Spencer asks Tanner if she believes Mary killed Archer. Tanner says what she believes and what she can prove are two different things.

The girls leave the room and Spencer asks if she can see Mary; Tanner doesn’t think it’s wise. They see the police moving Mary and she makes eye-contact with the girls and puts a finger to her lips.

They go back to Mona. Dr. Sullivan is on her way. Hanna apologizes to Mona for getting her involved and messing up her mental health. Mona tells you, “You needed me. You don’t know what that felt like. Just like you needed me to take care of Charlotte.” She apologizes for messing it up and they’re confused.

So, we go back to the flashback. Mona can’t push Charlotte out and instead brings her back inside. But Charlotte decides to keep antagonizing her, saying that the others will never love her; she decides to fight Mona. Mona fights back and shoves Charlotte into a wall; some metal was sticking out and it went into Charlotte’s neck, killing her. And the police never found it because they suck. As Mona finishes up her story the sun abruptly rises, brightening the whole room.

The girls go back to the game and it says “Congratulations” and turns off. They all speculate on if it was Mona’s confession or Mary’s or AD’s loss of leverage that ended the game. Spencer says she isn’t sure of that, but she is sure of them. One of them mentions that they never did figure out who AD was, but it’s just dismissed with, “Oh well. It’s done now.” Then we see AD driving off into the bright light with the game pieces in the backseat.

So…no answers; not where it counts. Even the people being targeted don’t care anymore. Second to last episode of the series.

[briannaslist]

Choose or Lose

A Pretty Little Liars Recap (7x18)

Ali and Emily are about to have some sexy time, potentially in an effort to convince us that they do have some chemistry. It’s not convincing, so they cut it off to show us that the board game has moved into their bedroom. They see the new puzzle piece that was added secretly by Aria in the previous episode. Then they get interrupted by the police, who are searching all of the girls’ houses. Hanna called Aria in time to warn her and Aria shreds the police report she wrote about Ezra. When the police get to Ali and Emily’s bedroom, there is no board game.

Spencer learns that Detective Tanner is back. It would be exciting if only they hadn’t ruined her character last time. She says that Furey is off the case; he told her everything about Spencer and took himself off. That’s right; off screen, unceremoniously gone. He was too smart, with too many morals, so they just shuttled him off.

Tanner asked to head the investigation herself after Furey stepped down. She always felt like the girls were guilty of something, but never knew how. Which doesn’t seem like the proper reason to take over an investigation.

The police are taking everything, including phones. Ezra follows the police out of The Brew to ask them some questions about the search warrant and more logistics. Aria hears a phone ringing behind a vent. It’s AD calling. Aria says she wants to meet them. AD says they’ll text her the details.

Hanna packed up some stuff and goes to The Radley. She sees her mom in the lobby and Ashley tells Hanna she knows they’re being investigated and asks Hanna if she needs any help. Hanna says she does, but she isn’t letting her mom put herself on the line. She goes upstairs to a suite that Ashley set up for them. Spencer, Emily, Alison, and Caleb are there. Spencer got them all phones to use for the time being.

Emily mentions how freaked out she is since AD was probably watching her and Ali sleep last night. Everyone perks up at her phrasing and Hanna asks if they’re together. They both just give smiles in response and Hanna says it’s about time. Is it Hanna?

Hanna looks under a food tray in the kitchen and finds the phone from the game. It says “Choose or Lose. Just one plea, the rest go free. If no one steps up, you all go down.” Mona comes in and tells them if they want an explanation, they should ask Aria. Mona figured out that Aria is on the AD team. And it only took her like two days.

Mona gives her reasoning, including hearing a portion of Aria’s call to AD. She even plays part of that conversation for them. But Spencer wants more concrete proof.

Meanwhile, Detective Tanner has enough to think they could file charges within the week. They somehow found broken glass with blood in the shower drain. How a piece so small managed to stay there with blood is beyond me, but hey, there it is.

Toby runs into Spencer in the lobby at The Radley. He has long hair and a full beard. So, um… how long has Toby been gone? It’s been what, like a week, maybe two, since Yvonne died. What happened at that cabin while he was “not fishing”? Toby tells her that Detective Tanner called him in for questioning, which is why he’s in town. Spencer asks him how he’s been and he says he has good and bad days. Are they, like, every other day because they have given no indication of significant time passing? He tells her the cabin is nice since it’s away from all the noise and invites her there. Spencer responds by asking about Tanner. He tells her that it seems like Tanner is building a solid case.

Ezra catches Aria being all suspicious, wearing all black. He asks her what’s going on, but gets interrupted by a phone call. Aria takes advantage of this and leaves. Aria goes to the meeting place and is surrounded by the girls.

She tells them the truth about why she’s there. She tells them about the leverage AD had with the police report and Ali is outraged that she chose to protect Ezra over them. Why is anyone surprised? Aria’s done it before. In fact, they all have. And their significant others have too. Ali gets a phone call and steps away. Aria keeps trying to explain herself and reminds them that they’ve done terrible things at AD’s request. She reminds Spencer about how she kidnapped Ezra’s kid (I cannot remember where we landed on that one). Spencer’s response is, “Yeah but I didn't hurt him. Because of you, my parents are getting a divorce. You ruined everything I had.”

Wow. I mean where do you even start with that? First off, if anyone should be sympathetic, it should be Spencer. Both she and Toby worked for A in the past due to threats. Second, how can one ever respond to the statement that they didn’t hurt a child that they kidnapped. Like even if it wasn’t violent, that’s still a bad thing. That sounds like Charlotte’s, “But did you die?” defense. Third, how the hell is Aria responsible for Spencer’s parents breaking up? The Hastings’ household is a giant mess and always has been. Spencer even recently asked her mom why she was still married to Peter. Aria just put in a recording that AD would have played in their house regardless. AD manages to get into all their houses to move a giant board game; they can play a recording without Aria’s help. Even without the conspiracy to murder, we still have Peter fathering children with the neighbors more than once. This was an inevitability.

Ali comes back, saying the call was from Detective Tanner, who wants all five of them to come down to the station. Spencer tells Aria that she can find her own ride. Okay, so skipping over how silly that symbolic statement was considering Aria already drove herself there, how does Tanner have the number to Ali’s temporary phone? Rosewood police.

The girls get to the station and are put into a room together. Tanner shows them the windshield fragment and tells them they’re going through their internet searches. They also have some footage of the girls from The Radley. Tanner is offering them an opportunity to tell their side. Spencer speaks for all of them and refuses for all of them. I would never let Spencer speak for me. She’s the worst one. It’s cool to be annoyed at the situation, but take it down several notches Spencer. Tanner says they’re done and they all leave.

Aria calls AD while driving in her car. AD is disappointed in how sloppy Aria was. AD hasn’t been paying any attention after all; Aria was sloppy since day one. Aria accuses AD of never intending to meet her and getting her busted on purpose. She says AD has given her nothing and AD says they gave her the file. Aria says they’re done and disconnects the call.

The rest go to The Radley and openly talk about the crimes they committed while knowing they’re being watched by a master manipulator and investigated by the police. Emily says this time is different from the others because they did kill a guy. This. Is. So. Frustrating. There is no they, first of all. His death was not a joint effort. There was one driver and it was Hanna. Who also did not murder anyone. She was driving a car that he ran in front of. That’s not murder. He was in all black, in the woods, at night. She didn’t see him until he hit her car. All they had to do was call the police. Hanna was not going to go to jail for that. Look at her. They’re not arresting Hanna. In a show full of stupid, this is high up there.

They get a notification that they only have 24 hours to have someone turn themselves in. Each starts offering up why they’re the best candidate for turning themselves in. Emily points out that this is what AD wants, to tear them apart; she says they already succeeded with Aria and Spencer says Aria did it to herself. Honestly, Spencer, please fuck off. Luckily Emily calls her out and says that Spencer is the first person AD convinced to play the game.

The next morning, Ashley approaches Caleb in The Radley to ask about Hanna. As always. Caleb is probably really annoyed with Ashley asking about Hanna every time she sees him so he just tells her the truth. And he tells Hanna that he told her. Hanna is upset but he gets back in her good graces basically by being cute and sappy. She says she shouldn’t have involved him in everything and he holds her hand and says, “But you did.” And then the scene just ends. Why did we add that line?

Spencer goes to talk to Aria. She found an old picture of them and says it made her think about things. Aria says that she’s sorry and Spencer says she wishes she could forgive her. Clearly Spencer think much. She starts saying that Aria was right about her being just as bad – which also seems like unnecessary phrasing – but she gets cut off by a loud knock on Aria’s door. The police are returning Aria’s stuff. A video came in showing Aria in New Hampshire the night of Dunhill’s murder. Now Aria’s in the clear. Spencer storms out and Ezra walks in through the other entrance. Aria tells him they need to talk.

Turns out Ezra knew about the file this whole time. Aria’s not discrete and she left it out. He figured that’s what she was shredding and said he took it to the composter to be completely sure it was gone. She tries to apologize for writing it and he says she was right to do it and that he wouldn’t have blamed her if she had turned it in, then or now. He says he deserved it and maybe still does. Aria says he doesn’t and that she’s done some terrible things. Ezra tells her that she doesn’t have to tell him, but Aria insists that she does. But first she kisses him because she doesn’t know if he’ll stick around after she does tell him.

Caleb takes Hanna to the courthouse. He got them simple rings and says one day they may be able to afford nicer ones and a bigger ceremony. Plus the perk of them not having to testify against each other if they’re married. Hanna notes the time of day and says they’ll have to wait for morning. But Ashley is there and she made some calls to have the ceremony that night.

Alison set up a candlelight picnic in the middle of the woods for her and Emily. Why won’t these people stop going to the woods?

Spencer goes to Toby’s cabin. She says what will happen will happen. Toby notes the statement doesn’t sound like her. She tells him it feels like they’re always saying goodbye and asks him if he remembers the goodbye kiss they shared. You know, the one before he went off to start his life with his fiancé? The one before they got into an unfortunate accident and his fiancé was hospitalized and he married her there and she died the same day? That one. “It was nice wasn’t it?” Toby nods in agreement and they kiss again.

I feel like Toby was in a more vulnerable position and Spencer just capitalized on that. It seems wrong. But with less than 24 hours, we get a montage of Caleb and Hanna getting married while every other couple has sex. And it’s not short. Just…send them all to jail and end the show here.

At 3:59, the girls and Caleb get together. Except Aria because they don’t care about her anymore. Hanna says they should make a promise to not get mad after the countdown, no matter what anyone does. They agree. Where were those sentiments when they found out about Aria?

The timer counts down and says they lose. Spencer picks up a rock and smashes the phone. Where did she get the rock? Caleb says he got a hit on the game’s location and texted Ezra to meet him. Hang on. Ezra? So they must know that Aria told him. What, Aria gave them the heads up and they just freezed her out of their countdown party? And after she participated in the sex montage! These people are the worst.

Aria calls AD and says she’ll turn herself in and that will fix everything with her friends. Yes, the proper retribution for messing up a nursery is to admit to murder (when it wasn’t murder) and go to prison. AD says they ran out of time and the game is over. They say she won unlimited freedom and that they enjoyed the game and will miss their calls. And then the phone catches fire. Aria drops it and leaves the apartment. She leaves the burning phone on her wood floors. There are no words.

Aria calls Spencer from her car and says she’s on her way over there with an idea of how to fix everything. But then she hears a clunk. She pulls over and checks her trunk. She’s startled by a dead body in the trunk and drops her keys in there. A police car pulls up behind her and she slams the trunk closed, with the keys still inside.

Caleb and Ezra follow the signal all the way to Mona’s apartment. Mona is staring intently at the game as a jail cell pops up. She puts on her glasses. End episode.

[briannaslist]

Driving Miss Crazy

A Pretty Little Liars Recap (7x17)

Ezra and Aria take salsa lessons, so we’re subjected to them awkwardly dancing. When the class is over, Aria sees that she’s missed three blocked calls. Is AD not a stalker who knows everywhere they go? Call at a better time. Ezra is thinking she’s acting weird because of his brother being demanding about the wedding and tries to reassure her that it’ll be okay. Ezra leaves and Aria calls AD back. AD finally reveals what’s in the file: it’s a police report Aria filled out (but obviously never submitted) about the relationship she had with Ezra years ago, when he was her teacher.

Furey pays a visit to Hanna, probably hoping she’d be less annoying to talk to than Spencer. He was wrong. Caleb is there too. Furey says a witness saw them both at The Radley the same night that the basement flooded. Caleb’s like, “Of course they saw us, I live there.” Furey notices that Caleb is drying his hair, having just come out of the shower, and asks why he showers there. What a silly question to ask when he’s obviously dating Hanna. He asks Caleb why he lives at the hotel and Caleb says that Ashley offered him a room there in exchange for setting up the security system. Furey thinks that’s interesting since the system failed and asks Caleb who else has access to the system. Caleb tells him he’d have to ask Ashley Marin. But Ashley and Furey have already talked.

Emily is helping Spencer pack up her house. Alison isn’t in this episode because she went to visit Jason. How come she’s the only one that gets to leave town? Hanna texts Emily saying they need to play the game again. The girls get together to tell Hanna to calm down. Hanna asks why Aria still hasn’t had a turn. It’s not fair if they don’t all get tortured; what is fair is that Hanna wants her best friend to also endure some torture. It’s what friends do.

Mona comes in and Hanna tells them that Mona knows about the game. Spencer for what whatever reason decides to be bitchy about that. Mona says she’s staying involved since she’s the one who replaced the windshield, making her an accomplice to a crime that never needed to be committed because it was an accident but okay. She says she’s not leaving her fate to them (because they’re all really stupid and a surefire way to go to prison).

Since Caleb was reminded that he lives at The Radley, he decides to go back there, where he runs into Ashley. She tells him all about the detective and the questioning and asks him if Hanna’s in any trouble. She’s been investigated by the police multiple times…what do we think Ashley?

Aria goes to the Hasting’s house with food for them. Veronica thanks her and asks her if she can stay, but Aria says she can’t. When Veronica leaves the room, Spencer asks Aria how she feels about the Mona thing; Spencer clearly doesn’t like it. While Spencer’s back is turned, Aria connects a phone to their speakers via Bluetooth and hides the phone in a box. After she leaves, a recording is played over the speakers of Peter talking to Mary about Jessica’s murder. Peter comes down frantically trying to figure out where it’s coming from and unplugs the speakers.

Emily is on the phone with Ali, while Mona gets settle in the kitchen. Before Emily hangs up she says a quiet “You too.” Mona says, “You can tell Ali you love her in front of me. I’ve known since Brownies.” Mona has a gift for them; she found the fertility doctor who performed Ali’s procedure and made an appointment to see him. They’ll pose as a couple. Now do one better, Mona, and expose that guy so he loses his medical license because he shouldn’t be a doctor.

Caleb and Hanna are at The Brew, openly discussing their plight. Ezra comes over with coffee for them and asks what they’re stressed about. They don’t answer and Ezra says he’s feeling stressed too with all this wedding stuff. He just wanted something simple and now everyone is making the thing all about themselves. Just then, Aria walks by. Ezra asks if she can join them and she says she’s tired

Mona and Emily go to the doctor. Mona says Alison referred them. He’s startled by the name. Mona asks for more information, but he says to find another doctor. They leave and Mona shows Emily a magazine that she stole from the office that has his home address listed. For whatever reason Emily is scandalized that Mona took the magazine. The girl who helped bury a body, shocked by the theft of a magazine.

Hanna goes to the shed where they found shovels to bury the body. A security guard finds her there and she says her car is stuck, so she was looking for shovels. He says that they were confiscated because they may have been used in a crime.

Spencer finds the phone in a box tells Aria about it. Spencer’s parents think Mary did it. She wants to tell her mom about the game and Aria tells her to hold off and wait for Mona to make some headway. Ezra comes in and Aria hurries off the phone. Ezra wants to brighten Aria’s spirits and tells her he found a song that he thinks will work for their first dance. He plays it, but Aria is unresponsive. He thinks her behavior is because she has reservations about marrying him because of his actions in the past. However, he thinks they’re stronger for having weathered the storm. I’m not even gonna touch that one.

Spencer goes to her car, only to see Marco there waiting for her. He tells her that he didn’t know about her dating Caleb and thinks maybe she was embarrassed to share that; he implies that’s why she pursued him and that she was trying to get a cop in her corner. She tells him he’s confusing personal with professional and says any further conversations can be in his office. He drives away and she gets surprised by Mary being in her car.

Mary has her drive to the Lost Wood Resort and tells Spencer they can talk inside. But Spencer is a little scared, since Mary greeted her by putting a hand over her mouth and telling her to drive. Not a good approach. They talk in the car.

Flashback: Mary went to the Hastings’ house hoping to see Spencer. Peter tells her that she’ll never see Spencer. Then Jessica comes in and says she thought they were taking care of Mary. Present day: Yes, they were conspiring to kill Mary. Peter wrote the prescription and Mary found out and switched it with Jessica’s medication. She asks Spencer if she would consider staying with her; great segue after admitting to murder without any prompting.

Hanna gets home and loudly talks to Caleb about the police having the shovels and spending the last four hours having Lucas’s car detailed, all while Caleb is trying to get her to stop talking. Ashley comes into the kitchen having heard the last part and asks why Hanna was having Lucas’s car detailed. Hanna lies and says she’s been using the car as an office and has dirtied it. Caleb starts getting some wine for them because everyone on this show drinks constantly to remind us they’re “adults”. Ashley asks if Emily moved out. Hanna tells her that Emily went to live with Ali and Ashley asks if that’s so Hanna and Caleb could be together. Nah, Ashley, that one was all for Emily’s benefit. Why all the forced questions?

Caleb says he’s there when he’s not at the hotel, but it isn’t permanent. Ashley asks him what is permanent. It’s all very weird. Caleb launches into this sappy thing all about how much he loves Hanna and wants to marry her. Ashley says they have something to toast. But they also could have just toasted in acknowledgement that Ashley still exists. And a better question would have been trying to figure out why Ashley and Caleb always look like they’re super into each other whenever they see each other.

But nothing is as strange as Aria’s dream sequence musical number with her getting married in toilet paper wedding garb in a prison to Ezra, who is in prison attire and is getting beat up, while Mona, dressed as a cop, sings Jailhouse Rock. Why is this happening and why is it so long? Then they walk up to the “alter” to see that Veronica Hastings is going to perform the ceremony. Aria starts apologizing to her and asking for forgiveness and Veronica calls her a selfish bitch and says she wouldn’t piss on her if she was on fire. That’s enough to wake Aria up. Both she and Ezra fell asleep on the couch while watching a movie. She sees that AD texted her, telling her that the reward is downstairs. Aria goes downstairs to The Brew and tries to look for the “reward” discretely. She’s not doing a great job though.

Mona and Emily go back to the doctor. They found the cash he was going to get for doing the procedure on Ali. They’ll return it in exchange for names. He says he doesn’t have names, but he does have the donor’s ID number.

Mona manages to do all that, go to The Brew, get a cup of coffee, and see Aria finally find her envelope. Aria took that long. She and Aria make eye contact and Mona gives her a little wave. Aria waves back and hurries off.

Spencer comes home to see that her parents found the letter Mary wrote for her when she was a baby. Peter says it’s all a manipulative ploy. Peter isn’t apologetic about what he tried to do to Mary; he says he was trying to protect his family from a deranged psychopath. Seems a bit excessive Peter. He walks out and Veronica gives Spencer the letter back. She says they can start unpacking; they’re not going to Harrisburg and she’s giving up her senate seat. Spencer tells her that Mary wasn’t out to hurt them. I don’t care anything about the Hastings household.

Caleb and Hanna go to a tent in the woods and she asks him if he meant what he said earlier. He tells her he’d marrying right that second. Hanna takes the paper rings off some cigars. She puts one on Caleb’s finger and he does the same to her. Then they have sex in the tent because that’s their thing.

Spencer goes to see Mary and tells her that she can’t leave her friends or her mom. She catches herself on calling Veronica her mom and starts to apologize, but Mary cuts her off and says that Veronica is Spencer’s mother and that Spencer is lucky to have her. Everyone but the main characters are so rational. Let’s watch a show about them instead. Mary tells Spencer that she hopes that she can forgive her someday. But Spencer has already forgiven her; she says that Mary now needs to forgive herself.

Aria wears the black hoodie and connects the puzzle piece AD left her. It’s a good thing no one walked in at that exact moment. It’s like she wants to get caught. After she connects it, the game says the grand prize is behind her. Aria finds the police report.

Emily goes to see Mona to give her the phone that Spencer found in the box. She has some ideas and cautions Mona to take care. Mona says they can talk more in the morning and goes inside her apartment. After locking a million locks and watching Emily walk away, Mona sits at her computer and we see that she has all these pictures of the game board on her wall and the missing shovels in the corner of her apartment.

[briannaslist]

The Glove that Rocks the Cradle

A (late) Pretty Little Liars Recap (7x16)

Spencer gets questioned by the police and decides to be mostly antagonistic in her answers despite not being prompted to behave that way. Furey cuts the questioning after she starts talking about him and switches off with the detective that was questioning her. He brings her some water and tries to get her to tell the truth. All Spencer does is ask if she can go home. And it’s like she’s being weird on purpose. He tells her to get a lawyer because he’s getting the receipt in two days. The receipt she’s nervous about since she used Dunhill’s credit card, but signed her name on it, because she’s not the smart one. Now why Furey felt the need to give her the exact timeline is beyond me. Perhaps he’s not the smart one either.

Emily is now living with Alison. She’s been working on the nursery. She set up a good deal of it overnight with stuff she found in the attic. Alison loves it.

Aria gets a message from AD about never letting them go to voicemail. Well AD, maybe call at more convenient times. Ezra comes in and she quickly exits the message. He has brochures for dancing lessons so they can be prepared for the wedding. But Aria’s being weird and he picks up on it. She says she’s okay and leaves to go see the girls.

Spencer tells them about being drunk and using Dunhill’s credit card. I always thought the initial plan they had was to use the card in various anyway. So it would just look like he skipped town. But they’re all surprised and worried about her using the card in general, so I misunderstood all of that before.

Hanna says she can take the receipt when the Radley employees have a staff meeting. She’ll get Caleb to shut down the security system because he’s the one who installed it. However, he can’t leave it shut down for more than ten minutes; any longer and the security company is alerted. Great for a business, not so great for the situation. And to make matters worse, the game is ready for Hanna’s turn. It wants her to pick something up. While everyone else looks at the game, Aria gets a message saying “Hanna thinks it’s her turn, but yours isn’t up yet. And you’re playing for me.”  We know, AD; stop being obvious and excessive.

Everyone disperses. Let’s follow Hanna and Caleb. Hanna says they owe it to Spencer to help her; she thinks Spencer “self-destructed” that night because of them and their dumb love triangle. Couldn’t possibly be the burying a body that didn’t need burying in the first place because it was an accident. So tired of being reminded of Caleb and Hanna. Move on.

Spencer is spending time being rude to Emily. She’s helping Emily with the nursery and tells her that she’s thinking of getting Furey alone to talk to him. Emily tells her it’s a bad idea to overestimate someone’s feelings for her. Spencer counters by saying that’s what Emily’s doing with Alison and asks what the plan is there. Emily tells her that Ali wants to help with raising the baby and Spencer says that Emily is assuming a lot. Or, maybe you are Spencer because your situations are different.

Aria goes home and Ezra tells her about the meeting he had earlier with Jillian, the book publisher. Jill wants all the talking points to be about Nicole and he has a problem with that because he recently remembered that Aria has feelings. He tells Aria that he’s not gonna do the press tour if that’s how Jill wants to go about it. But Aria tells him to do it and she’ll be there cheering him on from the front row.

Hanna picks up the item for AD. It’s an external hard drive. Caleb plugs it in and there’s only one thing on there – a Patsy Kline song. How much space does that one song take up that it would require an entire hard drive? Hanna tells Caleb that Patsy Kline was played when they were in the dollhouse, though not particular song. What’s the significance? We’ll never know. Caleb asks if there could be any link between Lucas and the song. Oh right, we’re still pretending that Lucas is a suspect.

Spencer fully ignores what Emily said to her because she’s smart and she goes to Detective Furey’s apartment. He lets her come in, but doesn’t let her get comfortable. She’s taken aback and he tells her to just say what she wants to say. Spencer says Dunhill is a terrible person ( why would you lead with that) and she asks him to let this one “slip through the cracks”. And he’s looking at her with total disbelief. He hands her a tissue (since she’s crying a little), tells her no, starts moving to the other room to take a phone call, and tells her to leave.

And Spencer clearly cannot believe that this didn’t work. It’s absolutely hilarious. But he shouldn’t have left her because she sees a flash drive labeled with Lucas’s last name on it. He’s gone from decent cop to just okay; which is still better than most of the cops in Rosewood. Spencer takes the flash drive on her way out.

Spencer brings the flash drive to the others and they watch a video on it. It’s Lucas being questioned, post Charlotte’s murder. He says that he doesn’t know where Hanna was that night of the murder, but he doesn’t think that she did it; the others on the other hand, he wouldn’t be surprised. Hanna’s like, “Sure that’s not great, but he isn’t AD.” She can understand why he did it; he got caught lying, so he told the truth. Because why should he go to jail for some girls who bullied him? Aria suggests they stake out the locker where Hanna is supposed to deliver the hard drive. Which is awkward since no locker was mentioned. Aria awkwardly covers, but everyone is too distracted to think much of it. Oh, and just to make us feel more convinced that the others are right, they decide to show us Lucas in a limo, reading the old comic he wrote with Charles.

The next morning, Emily shows Alison her old baby mobile. But then she realizes that Ali didn’t take her prenatal vitamins and is super upset at her and says she can’t believe that Ali is flaking out on her already. But Alison honestly just forgot. She just started taking them; it would stand to reason that that she’d forget.

The girls and Caleb group up; Alison’s not there because she actually works. Hanna’s instructions were to drop the hard drive off at the school the same time as the staff meeting at The Radley. Then Aria’s like, “sorry for the bad timing and shortage of friends, but Ezra’s press thing is tonight, so…” Emily tells her to go and says that she and Ali will stake out the locker. Literally the two worst people to do it.

Everyone walks out except Spencer and Caleb. Spencer got a message asking to schedule a second interview with the police. Caleb apologizes, saying it’s partially his fault that she was drinking that night and promises that he and Hanna won’t let her down this time and hopes that it means something. Conversely, maybe you shouldn’t cope with alcohol.

Hanna is on her way out of her (well Lucas’s) apartment. Mona was about to knock on her door when Hanna opens it. She asks why Hanna hasn’t been telling her anything about the game and Hanna tells her about the hard drive. Mona offers to be another set of eyes and Hanna tells her that the others don’t know that Hanna told her. Mona asks how many times she has to help them before she’s finally a part of the group.

Aria never shows up to Ezra’s thing; she’s “destroying” the nursery for AD. It’s almost comical how bad of a job she does. Just lightly handling everything. While that’s happening, Emily and Ali do a terrible job staking out the locker. Emily uses the opportunity to apologize to Ali for being mad about the vitamins and Ali tells her she feels like she’s failing Emily. Why would we have a heart-to-heart at this exact moment? They drove there together and live in the same house. And then they hear the locker close and realize they never saw who did it and go trying to run after the person, splitting up. That results in Ali getting knocked over and Emily deciding whoever was there is “long gone” despite it only being 30 seconds. They go home.

Aria is still destroying the nursery in the slowest manner possible, when she hears Emily and Alison. She trips over stuff. Multiple times. AD could not have picked a worse person. Emily picks up a candlestick to go after the intruder, but Aria gets away.

Meanwhile, Ezra does the press conference and says that he’s starting the next chapter of his life with Aria and says she’s always been there for him. Because screw Jillian and her wishes. They have to double down on reminding us that Ezra does care about her. We’re running out of episodes.

Aria meets up with Spencer, Emily, and Alison to look at the destroyed nursery. Ali figures the hard drive delivery was a set up to get them out of the house. Aria just lingers quietly in the background, watching Emily and Alison looking sad. Alison says that AD has a helper, since they couldn’t beat them home from the school and manage to do all that damage. But I thought they already knew that. Then it gets weird when Spencer finds Aria’s earring over where the rest of them are. Aria’s so bad at this she wore personal identifying information. Spencer returns the earring and doesn’t question her further.

Hanna is searching through the appropriately labeled boxes at The Radley, trying to find the receipt, when Caleb comes in asking her what’s taking so long. Hanna can’t find it so Caleb just dumps the boxes by a pipe and dents the pipe, saying there will be nothing for them to find. Except the relevant materials being dumped by the purposely broken pipe. They go to the manager’s office and Caleb starts resetting the system. He goes downstairs to finish and leaves Hanna in there. Hanna listens to a voicemail from Mona saying that she didn’t see anyone at the school, but Emily and Ali heard her and chased her. While listening, Hanna sees the cameras turning back on and sees Lucas in one of the hallways.

Spencer gets a call from Furey, who is highly upset. He says she needs to return the flash drive and she just keeps saying she doesn’t know what he’s talking about and tells him that if she did take something, it would mean that she was in his apartment alone, and she thinks people may think that’s strange. He just hangs up. Fair threat; here’s a counterpoint: she went to his apartment trying to negotiate him dropping part of an ongoing investigation.

Lucas is at his apartment, frantically searching though his things. The girls come in, accusing him and asking why he’s there looking for things… in his own apartment. And when they say he destroyed a nursery Lucas looks straight at Aria. Aria pipes up and says maybe he didn’t do it. Hanna says they saw the tape and Ali says now he’s sending body parts to implicate them. Lucas is very confused and says the reason he’s looking so worried is because of the book. He didn’t know that it was his childhood friend that was torturing them before. They had kept in touch over email, but he never knew about Charles transitioning to Charlotte or any “A” stuff. His emails were detailing how Ali used to bully him while the others just stood back and watched. Spencer asks him why he stole the comic book. Stole. His own property, from his own apartment. These girls are the worst. He says the book was sent to him along with a note saying “Want to keep your friendship a secret. Meet me at The Radley.” He went, but no one ever showed up. He came back home looking for the sequel; the sequel turns the vengeance into a game. He didn’t want the book ending up in AD’s hands, but it looks like he was too late. They ask how the book ends and he tells them is was never finished.

When everyone is gone and Lucas is getting ready to leave, Hanna tells Lucas that she believes what he told them. She asks him why the factory is for sale. I like this; just direct questions. He tells her that he thinks she’s talented, but had trouble convincing the others. He’s the only investor and was too embarrassed to tell her that he lost the money from the investment. Hanna feels terrible for losing Lucas’s money, but Lucas is the one who does the reassuring and says he’ll make it back. He says she was worth losing everything. She thanks him and says she never doubted him; he says he knows. All while giving her a look that confirms he still loves her. I hope Lucas finds someone wonderful in the future; the way they’re rushing everything, they’ll probably throw him and Mona together.

Spencer is back in the interrogation room at the police station. Furey comes in and tells her about the flood in the records room at The Radley. He says they’ll just broaden the scope of the investigation. A little unnecessary to have her come there just for that.

Emily and Alison joke about Em trying to protect her with the candlestick earlier. Emily says it’s a little silly because Alison is the strongest woman she knows. Alison says she knows Emily will always protect her. Emily asks her why she always pushes her away, knowing that’s the case. This is the worst conversation ever. Alison says she doesn’t know why she pushes Em away, but she’s ready to stop and wants to be a family with Emily. She tells Emily that she loves her and they kiss. All of this feels so rushed.

Aria goes home and sees a response to her text apologizing to Ezra for missing his event. He says it’s fine and that she didn’t miss much. She looks down and sees a cut on her arm from when she tripped in the nursery. This leads to her laying on the couch a crying. I guess we’re supposed to feel bad for her, but I don’t feel bad for any of them. I’m still rooting for them to all go to jail.

Lastly, an AD scene. AD has the second comic. It’s called Endgame. AD shows off their lack of drawing skills by drawing an elementary school level tree and a gravestone saying “He Lies…”. Naturally we don’t see who AD writes down. But now we know AD is not an artist. Answers.

[briannaslist]

In the Eye Abides the Heart

A (late) Pretty Little Liars Recap (7x15)

I can barely remember what happened after the fiasco of the previous episode. I had to block the bad writing from my mind. We start with Emily asking Ali what she’s going to do about the baby. Ali turns it around and asks her what she wants to do. Emily has no real answer and suggests that they get a blood test because they shouldn’t just take AD’s word for it. They choose now to be skeptical. It doesn’t last.

Meanwhile Aria has joined the “dark side”. She’s sneaking around, hiding behind a dumpster behind The Brew. Why she’s hiding steps away from where she lives, I couldn’t tell you. She Facetimes with AD who has this hilariously weird Aria filter covering their face. Hopefully that doesn’t mess up.

Everyone, sans Ali, gets together at The Brew. Hanna’s the only one convinced that Lucas is innocent, while the rest are convinced otherwise. So…it’s not Lucas. We’ve been here for seven years. They’re not as smart as they think they are. Spencer says they should be discrete in investigating Lucas.

The girls then spend the rest of the episode not being discrete. Like Spencer. She goes to see Detective Furey and asks about the finger that was delivered to the station. He tells her that it leads to a theory that Mary Drake killed Dunhill. And they have full confirmation that Dunhill is dead now. But she’s being weird the whole time. Even the worst cop would know she’s being sketchy.

When Spencer gets home, she sees that someone was in the barn. There’s a note left in a bottle there saying that they need to talk. It’s from Mary. Spencer leaves a response in the bottle.

Ezra is on a call with Nicole’s parents; They want him to come back to help them, because despite being parents of a grown adult, they need their hands held every step of the way when dealing with this situation. Aria tries to be sympathetic. Ezra leaves to “run errands” and I guess think for a bit. As he’s leaving, AD calls Aria, wanting to know what she and the others were talking about in The Brew. They were talking about it loudly AD; it was impossible to miss what they were discussing. Aria tries to blow it off as nothing but AD knows that’s an obvious lie. How is Aria such a bad liar? After getting called out, Aria tells the truth.

Meanwhile, Emily tells Paige about Ali’s pregnancy. But not about the ridiculous maternity of the baby. Paige has a new perspective of Ali and feels bad that Ali was deceived about her husband and now is carrying his child. They finish up the conversation and Paige leaves the room. Ali calls Emily and tells her that Emily is the mother, but the baby isn’t Archer’s (wrong blood type). Doesn’t really seem like the conversation that should be had over the phone, but sure. Why not.

Emily and Hanna get together to search through Lucas’s stuff. In his apartment. That they loudly acknowledge is likely bugged. Discrete indeed. Hanna decides to pass the time talking about Emily and Ali’s situation, in the home of the person they think could be targeting them. If AD is Lucas, let’s just make his job easier. Emily doesn’t want to have this conversation at all and luckily Hanna sees something out of place in a box of Lucas’s comics. They take it out and find a comic called Arcturus, authored by Lucas and Charles.

The story is about a boy who gets bullied by other kids and his family. He has a protector friend that shapeshifts into Arcturus and he can experience the revenge she gets for him. It’s obvious that it served as a release for them when they were children. The person Hanna and Emily called in to share this story with is bad egg Aria, who wonders if this confirms Lucas being AD and maybe even the father of Ali’s baby. Aria shares the new findings with AD.

Ali is at the police station, getting updated by Detective Furey. He thinks Dunhill was killed the same day he left town and thinks more than one person was involved in the murder. He thinks someone is getting nervous, which is why they’re giving him clues. Uh oh, Detective Furey may actually be good at his job.

Emily and Spencer discuss this baby thing. Everyone is just gonna weigh in. Emily thinks that she has no claims to the baby and just feels bad that someone violated Ali like that. Spencer points out that Emily was wronged too. I don’t know how many times we have to repeat that this situation is not okay and is a serious violation; we all got that immediately. Consensus is that it’s gross and wrong that that was done without their knowledge. Turns out, Emily already knows what she wants, so she goes to Ali and asks her to consider keeping the baby.

Meanwhile, Hanna goes back for the comic book and finds that it’s already gone. Because bad egg Aria stole it for AD. She calls Spencer to tell her, but Spencer has more pressing matters. She got a return message from Mary, along with a key.

Mona approaches Hanna at The Brew; that Hanna sure does move fast. Hanna tells Spencer that Lucas put the clothing factory up for sale and says that he’s stealing her company out from under her before they even got it started. Hanna’s getting worried with these clues further leading to him.

Hanna remembers that Mona is significantly smarter than any of them and decides to show her the board game. Mona is impressed with the intricacies of the game and figures out that the thing is battery powered. She figures that means that the game isn’t “listening” all the time because it would drain too much power. Hanna wants Mona to help her play the game, but Mona is very hesitant. She’s afraid that getting into the game with make her addicted to it. Hanna entices her by telling her to imagine how she’ll feel beating the game.

Aria goes to Rosewood High to leave the comic book in locker 214. It’s ridiculous at this point that the school doesn’t seem to even have security cameras outside. But the, it also sees they don’t even lock the doors. Anyway, Aria gets like two steps away from the locker when she decides to turn back and get the comic back. But when she opens the locker, it’s already gone and is replaced with a black hoodie.

She comes home to an even worse surprise though. Ezra has packed a small bag and is writing a letter to  her. He tells her that Nicole’s parents want him to talk to the new doctor. Aria’s had enough of this and asks why he can’t just call the doctor, and furthermore doesn’t understand how these two adults can’t talk to a doctor just because they “don’t like him”. It’s stupid. But Ezra is adamant on leaving because he feels like he needs to fix this situation for everyone and he says they’ll talk about it when he gets back.

Emily tells Paige that Alison is carrying her child. Paige processes this and decides that she should leave for that job after all. There was no point in her staying. All of this was pointless. Emily tries saying that she doesn’t have to go; she thinks they could work it out, all three of them taking care of this kid. But Paige, being one of the few people on this show to grow up in the past five years, says that’s a bad idea. Did Emily ever even ask Paige if she wanted to raise a kid at this point in her life? They share a tearful goodbye kiss and Paige is gone forever.

Or so we thought. She visits Alison on her way out of town. Ali tries to tell Paige that she doesn’t have to leave just because she may be having a child. But we don’t have any more time for extra love interests. She says she’s sorry Ali is going through all of this, but says before she goes, she needs to know if Ali loves Emily. Alison tries dodging the question and Paige suggests she tries to be honest with herself. So, Ali gets all wistful (or as wistful as possible since this entire thing seems semi-developed) and she says that she knows how she feels when Emily looks at her and how she’s never felt that way before; how she wants to be the person Emily sees when she looks at her. Paige thanks Alison for not lying to her; she departs telling Ali she’ll have a beautiful baby. And now Paige is (presumably) gone forever.

Spencer goes to hotel room. She hears someone outside and finds out that it’s Detective Furey. He saw her leaving and followed her. Spencer decides the best way to deal with this situation is to be as suspicious as possible. For example, when he asks her who she was supposed to meet there she says “no one” in a very sketchy fashion, despite it being clear she was waiting for someone. She just sat there in the dark for close to an hour. She’s not obligated to answer the questions, but if you are gonna answer, there has to be a better way. Furey tells her things have changed and he won’t be able to help her if she won’t talk to him.

All the signs are pointing to Spencer and the others being involved in Archer Dunhill’s death. But it looks worse for Spencer because she has a double connection of Alison and Mary. He knows that Dunhill’s credit card was used at The Radley the same night that they were there. He’s requested paper receipts for that night to see the signature on Dunhill’s receipt. Which is hilarious because Spencer used Dunhill’s credit card to pay for their drinks, but signed with her name; she even told Furey she was burying a body that night. Because she’s not the smart one.

Later, Ezra is at the airport and realizes that he shouldn’t be getting on that plane. But as he picks up his bag, he sees Spencer having a conversation that seems a little heated with none other than Wren. He has this moment of slight alarm where you can tell he hopes he isn’t seen. Which seems a bit odd. But Spencer sees him and calls him over. She introduces him to Wren. It’s weird because it seems like Ezra and Wren already know each other. She asks Ezra if he can stick around and have a drink with them and Ezra says he’s on his was out. Spencer follows him back to his stuff. (Unrelated: never leave your bags unattended in a public place, especially an airport.) Spencer asks him to keep seeing her and Wren under wraps. Ezra is really confused by the request and is like, “…Who would I tell?” Spencer, Ezra really doesn’t give a shit about your life or your weird British friends. She tells him she just want things getting back to Furey and Ezra’s like, “Alright, no problem, really gotta go.” Because again, he really doesn’t care.

Ezra goes home and tells Aria that she was right and that he decided not to get on the plane. Aria’s phone starts buzzing in her purse, but it’s not near them so she doesn’t realize she’s missing AD’s phone call.

Alison tells Emily that she’ll have the baby. Of course she will; how else were they gonna get Emison in a relationship at this point. It couldn’t be anything simple, like them just loving each other. She hugs Ali and thanks her and Alison thanks Emily for trusting her.

Spencer goes home and sees that she has another message: “You brought the police. I understand. Goodbye.” Mary why are you so melodramatic? The AD tops it by leaving a message for Aria. AD is using type-to-speech and is shown holding up an Aria file. And then AD laughs manically and the episode just ends with that. A literal evil laugh.

[briannaslist]

Arrow Season 5 Review

Spoiler Free!

I’m going to miss all of my shows now that it’s finale season, but I think I’ll miss Arrow the most. If you left Arrow in the back half of season 3 or during season 4 – come back home.

Sure, it wasn’t perfect; however, there were only two or three episodes that felt like they were missing something. And that’s out of 23. And let me clarify – the weaker episodes or moments weren’t bad; they were just okay. There were few things that I would outright call bad.

The Middle:

The replacement – I’m trying to be vague; if you watched it or have been keeping up on news of the show, you probably know who it is. They brought in this character, set them up with an interesting backstory, and proceeded to do next to nothing with them. We all know why they brought that character on. However, it’s just a middle of the road deal because this character has some promise and I like how well they fit with the rest of the cast.

Those weak episodes – They were just okay. But it could be so underwhelming at times. The show would go on break and sometimes come back to this episode that’s just alright. It could mess up the pacing at times. It may flow better as a binge watch.

Flashbacks – So very hit or miss. Sometimes I would forget why they were happening. We would eventually have to get to Oliver in Russia since we knew about his Bratva connection from previous seasons, but sometimes it was really off. And I hate how he got over there; I know that’s a holdover from last season and they couldn’t just drop it, but it was so bad. The antagonist in the flashback was not nearly as interesting as the ones in present day. And it was hard to tell how much time passed. Did this event take hours, days, months? But when it was on, wow was it on. It could be incredibly exciting.

Main Villain Theme – It was just so silly, I laughed every time it came on, even when the character was doing something awful.

Lowlights:

New Cast Members – Susan Williams and Evelyn Sharp…they don’t serve much of a purpose. I just didn’t like anything about Susan while Evelyn was uninteresting and irritating, with seemingly one personality trait.

Disappearing Characters – Sometimes they gave a silly excuse for the character leaving. Once or twice is easy enough, but when it happens multiple times in the season it just gets to be too much. For some I guess it was a scheduling conflict; but there were others where they were just gone and no one ever addressed it. They paid attention to so many other little details that this feels lazy.

Character motivations/Out of Character moments – There weren’t many of these, but at times I questioned why someone was doing something only to find that there was never an answer. Or an answer that seemed reaching. The OOC moments were just jarring. The best example I can think of is Diggle, who suddenly was far too morally righteous. Things that never bothered him before turn into this huge deal for no reason.

Highlights:

Oliver Queen – He has a story arc and it’s actually good! It makes sense. There’s this wonderful parallel during the flashbacks and present day that shows how Oliver is the way that he is. They’ve been doing this the whole time, but it floundered the past two seasons. This season put us back on track. We can understand Oliver’s motivation again. We get his personality again. Oliver is finally back to his, “take no shit” attitude and he’s better for it. He continues to grow as a person and as a hero. And his interpersonal relationships are so great to see, particularly in the end of the season. Also, Stephen Amell is so so good. His acting has steadily improved and he can be very captivating, from humorous to serious/dramatic.

The 100th Episode – Now that was a celebration of Arrow. It’s impressive that they could do a love letter to the show right in the middle of a crossover. They managed to incorporate many characters that we’ve been missing for the past couple seasons. Not everyone could make it, but it didn’t feel like much was missing. This is the episode that showed real appreciation for the characters and the stories. Not every show can do this properly.

New cast members – Some new cast members were better than others. The new characters I’m thinking of are Rene Ramirez, Adrian Chase, and Rory Regan. All very different characters who actually felt like they added something to the show. I found their stories interesting and they felt like they belonged.

Antagonists/Villains – Again overall. Some were better than others. And in an effort to stay spoiler free, I won’t name any names. I’ll just say that they were often very compelling and delightful to watch. And they were introduced at the right time; not too early, not too late. A very welcome change.

Curtis’ Magic Hair – No explanation needed.

Overall Improvement – So broad, but I just needed a place to list out the rest of the stuff that doesn’t need an individual category. Better fight choreography; Oliver’s costume looks good again; trick arrows; better set decoration; better balance between tones (the fun and the darker stuff); better balance among characters; interesting social commentary; Felicity Smoak. Actually, you know what, that last one is going to get expansion.

Felicity – So many things went wrong with Felicity in that fourth season (and arguably the third season too). Best way I could describe her character evolution is comic relief nerd into superhacker self-righteous bitch who was a terrible partner. They fixed this. Felicity and her feelings and thoughts were valued, but she didn’t dominate. Her character owned up to multiple mistakes and they got back that dynamic where she could present a different opinion without doing it in a way that made her seem infallible. She’s flawed and that’s okay. It looks like they’re bringing her closer to where she used to be.

The finale – That may be the best episode of the whole show. If not the best, then it is certainly up there. So much promise for the next season. For the first time in a long time, I want to rewatch the whole series.

I’m sure I’m missing other things, but no point in over-inflating the amount written here. It was a good season and it leaves me hopeful for the next.

[briannaslist]

Power Play

A Pretty Little Liars Recap (7x14)

This episode is kind of better. Not difficult to do, but a welcome change. It’s amazing – all you need to improve quality is have something actually happen.

Aria is sitting in the kitchen when Ezra comes in. He’s immediately apologetic about Nicole being there and he says he didn’t know that’s where she was going. She felt caged at the rehabilitation facility and she took off when no one was looking. Aria says she doesn’t know what Ezra has said to Nicole about their relationship, but she points out that all her pictures and  stuff are all over the apartment, so if Nicole didn’t know, she’ll know now. She picks up her purse to leave because Nicole is already asleep upstairs in the bed.

Aria goes to stay with Ali, who is very sweet to her. She wants to get Aria some food and take care of her. I’ve always felt that Aria was Ali’s second favorite. It’s nice to see someone other than Emily interacting with Ali for a change. And it’s such a quiet moment. Of course, it doesn’t last; as Aria and Ali head toward the kitchen they see that the game board has moved to her house. Ali calls Spencer the following morning.

Now it’s awkward for Spencer because she has a guest being in her bed. That guest being Detective Marco Furey. Ali is asking Spencer when they decided to move the board to her house and Spencer says they didn’t; she just woke up and it was gone. It’s so creepy how many times their houses are broken into – often times while they’re still inside. It doesn’t even phase them anymore. It’s Ali’s turn at the game.

Hanna’s on the phone with someone – Caleb I guess – explaining that the investor meeting didn’t go too well. She thinks Lucas did the best he could, but that it was a result of her not being there.

Emily is late for work and rushes into the teacher lounge. She apologizes to Paige for missing the meeting. Emily offers to take her to lunch, but Paige says she has a meeting with Hackett. Paige got an offer for another position at a college; it’s a much better job and Emily asks if Paige is gonna take it. She says she’d be stupid not to take the offer; I agree Paige, take the job. They would have talked further, but Ali walked in. Emily greeted Ali for like 10 seconds and Paige just walked off.

You know, Emily doesn’t interact with anyone else of consequence until the end of the episode, so let’s just breeze through this: Ali tells Emily that she made an appointment to terminate the pregnancy; she’ll take one pill at the clinic and then another at home. Emily offers to go with her to the clinic.

Later, Emily talks to Paige about the job offer. Paige says that the other school will need a decision soon. She says that she really shouldn’t have come back to Rosewood (I agree). Paige says being like there is like being back in high school. Maybe that’s due to everyone around her being emotionally and relationally stunted. Instead she goes with feeling like the odd one out all over again because Emily and Ali are keeping secrets. Because she should know everything that they talk about.

This left-out feeling causes Paige to snoop in the teacher’s lounge. Though she wasn’t actively looking – Ali’s bag was just haphazardly on the table with a brochure sticking out. She just rudely took it out. The brochure is about making a decision about pregnancy (naturally) and when Paige picks it up, she sees the appointment card. That’s when Ali comes back in and she snatches it right out of her hands. Beautiful moment.

Finding out Ali’s secret seems to have given Paige more perspective. Emily said she thought with Paige being back that they could rekindle things. When was that even a thing? She never seemed reinterested until this episode where she explicitly said it. Paige suggests they race to figure out if she leaves or stays. Please Emily, please lose. They get on their bikes and start racing. Paige got a head start and disappears on Emily. Emily stops, calling out for Paige, who walks over to her and says that she’s already decided to stay. Then they kiss.

Let’s move on to Aria. It’s Ali’s turn at the game, but A.D. has been messing with Aria, to nobody’s knowledge. First she got a message saying that they have a file on her and if Ezra were to know the secret, he would choose Nicole and she’d be visiting him in jail. She who? Nicole or Aria? I guess Nicole. So wait, Aria’s big secret could also implicate Ezra? Clarify AD.  Aria gets upset, so she picks up her Aria board game piece and throws it at a wine glass. Aria that dramatic outburst is gonna cost you…another wine glass. It’s not even your house.

When Aria talks to Ezra, he tells her that he didn’t mention the engagement to Nicole because the therapist didn’t think it would be a good idea. But considering Nicole saw Aria’s wedding dress in the closet, she kind of got the gist of what was happening. She also found the book and she wrote a heartfelt note in the margin of one of the pages. Aria starts reading it, but Ezra realizes that that can be damaging and he takes the page from her. I don’t even know how the rest of this goes with them – I lost interest and tuned it out.

Spencer’s dad finally comes home. Spencer sees his passport and when Peter comes in to apologize for not being there she’s like, “Your passport says that you were in Philadelphia a week ago.” Peter tells her that he was working with a private investigator to track down Mary.

The girls pair up because no one has a good storyline on their own. Hanna goes with Spencer to investigate the lead that Peter’s private investigator got on Mary. They end up at the home of Ted – the pastor that was going to marry Hanna’s mom. I forgot what happened with them. Anyway, he’s happy to see Hanna, but he says he hasn’t seen Mary. He invites them in for tea, but Spencer says they can’t stay. Too bad she did since Mary is actually staying there.

Meanwhile, Ali and Aria follow AD’s coordinates and find a baby store. Aria of course is confused about the significance, but before they can go in, Aria gets another message from AD. She says it’s from Ezra and tells Ali to go ahead.

Now if you can believe it, things actually get interesting. Let’s start with Ali. She goes in and the sales associate was expecting her. She gives her the scanner for a baby registry and AD messages her telling her to pick 10 items. Ali does as told and tells the saleswoman that she’s finished. The woman gives her a gift and Ali is confused. The saleswoman says that Ali asked for a personalized gift for the donor; she says it’s customized.

The rest of Ali’s moment may have been exciting if not for a few factors – the “customized gift” for the donor is like a child’s craft necklace that says Emily in craft beads; it would have taken less than a minute to make. But that makes Ali remember being in that treatment hospital, being drugged to unresponsiveness, and having a procedure done. Unfortunately, this also would have been better had they not played an audio clip of Emily saying “my eggs” over and over again. We got it – she’s carrying Emily’s child.

So not only did AD make someone who was getting an abortion go to a baby store, AD also artificially inseminated someone against their will? Truly, what the hell? Oh and wait – how did AD even do this? Either AD has he knowledge and skill to do this, or knows someone who does. More importantly, who’s the father. Please no twist where one of the boyfriends say that they were once a sperm donor.

While outside the baby store, Aria tell AD that she isn’t playing the game. AD tells Aria to meet them, so Aria leaves Ali. She gets into a waiting limo only to find Sydney. Great. Guess we’re stuck with her too.

Aria is like, “Why are you even involved in this? We barely know each other.” Aria’s making sense; now there’s your twist. Sydney spouts some nonsense about choosing to be on the “winning” side and offers Aria a spot with the winners. She says leaving Ali at the store was a good first step in earning trust with AD.

Peter was waiting for Spencer to come home. He knows that she was tracking down Mary. He gives her some answers. Soon after Spencer got out of rehab, Mary showed up to the Hastings’ house because she wanted to see Spencer. But she also wanted Peter’s help getting revenge on Jessica for telling her that Charlotte was dead. Peter said he wouldn’t help, but he thinks Mary stole his pills and used them to kill Jessica. Spencer is skeptical about Mary doing this because she and Jessica are twins…as if those two didn’t treat each other like shit all the time.

Oh and Hanna gets the best one: Ted was feeling uncomfortable after talking to her and Spencer, so he asked Mary to come clean about stuff. He and Mary dated for a bit back in college and in that time she became pregnant; he’s Charlotte’s father. Now that came from nowhere and I’m convinced they just went with that since they wanted to bring everyone back at least once. But please, no more surprise parents. The better surprise is that Ted know Charlotte, before Charlotte transitioned. But he had no idea about that child being his.

He met Charlotte as Charles back at a camp he ran for troubled boys. Glossing over how Charles was institutionalized, yet got to go to a summer camp, Ted shows Hanna picture of him, Charles, and another boy at the camp. Hanna asks who the other boy is and Ted says it was Charles’ only friend; he thinks his name is Luke or something along those line. Hanna asks “Lucas Gottesman?” and Ted verifies that that’s the name. Now that’s actually interesting; that’s a development I can get behind. Lucas has always been sketchy. It’s probably a red herring, but at least it’s one that makes sense.

Ali tells Emily about the ridiculous egg thing and cancels her appointment. They call the others, but Aria is late. When Aria comes in everyone is on edge; Emily being on edge the most. Emily yells at her for leaving Ali. Spencer then informs Aria about the pregnancy. Spencer says that they need to stick together though, since Aria’s turn is next.

The game starts making noise and they go over to see what it’s about. It’s “randomly” selecting and ends up on Hanna. Hanna is understandably pissed, but her fit about getting chosen seems a little bad since it comes across more as, “Why me? Aria should be getting her life wrecked this time.” Spencer says maybe Hanna is getting a do-over for missing her turn. Emily says that the game must have made a mistake and Ali says “the game knows exactly what it’s doing” and she gives Aria a look before following the others (who went to follow Hanna). Alone, Aria gets another message asking if she’s decided yet. All while a (once again too loud) music selection plays where the word “devil” is repeated as it focuses on Aria. We…we get it.

[briannaslist]

Hold Your Piece

A Pretty Little Liars Recap (7x13)

Hold Your Piece – aren’t we clever? Spencer is being woken up by the loud cries of a baby. It’s the game, being obnoxious. She keeps trying to muffle it and turn the phone down, but it doesn’t work, so she calls the others. As if they would be helpful. Hanna says they should just put the phone in Ali’s house since she’s conveniently out of town for the week, but Emily shuts it down and says that she doesn’t need to come home to a baby crying because reasons. I forgot the others don’t know about the pregnancy; I guess they needed to justify the show name. Finally, the phone reveals that it wants Hanna to play.

Hanna: Thanks to Mona, Hanna’s dress is getting recognition. It’s on the front page of a fashion magazine. Emily and Caleb are both there to share in her excitement; however, when Emily checks something out online about Hanna’s dress, she finds a fashion blog where Hanna is being accused of stealing the dress design.

Hanna and Caleb try to figure out who could have tipped off the blogger about Jenna having the dress earlier. Aria is over there too because she needs to do something other than plan her wedding. They reason out that Sydney may be a part of things since she used to help Jenna before. They’re really going to just bring out everyone, regardless of how much everyone hated the characters, huh? Aria gets distracted by a news broadcast showing a clip of an interview with Nicole; in the interview Nicole is talking about Ezra. Caleb and Hanna turn around to see her watching and they both give her the sympathy eyes, which Aria says to stop. She tells them that they found their way back to each other and she thinks she and Ezra will pull through too. They have to; we don’t have time to establish another love interest.

Hanna later gets a message from the game phone telling her to open the door. This is followed by loud banging on the door. Hanna is too afraid to open it and Caleb comes out like, “What the hell, who is that?” He opens the door and finds a mannequin wearing a Hanna mask. Does AD (or a minion of AD) have the ability of teleportation? How did they manage to get away from the door that quickly? He opened the door like three seconds after he walked into the room. Was the mannequin knocking?

With this delivery, Hanna now has to tell Caleb what’s been happening with the game. Naturally Caleb wants to help, so he says he’ll check out the game and see if there’s a way to take it apart or hack into it. But first Caleb asks what happens if they just don’t play it and at Hanna’s silence realizes that AD has the material about Rollins. You know, that crime they committed in order to hide that they didn’t commit a crime? He tells Hanna that the mannequin also talked when he opened the door. It gives them another message: “See the appendix for more info.”

If it had been Spencer (or maybe Aria), she would have immediately gone for the “appendix” on the doll. But it’s Hanna, so she searches all the books in her apartment first to see if there’s anything hidden in any appendices. Not a bad reasoning, but far too logical for what we’re dealing with. You need to be as implausible as possible. Ignoring that Hanna figured out to look in the doll because Caleb said he was trying to get into a spot on the game with tweezers and that made her think of “that one game with the guy and you had to take stuff out with tweezers” (yes, that’s how that exchange went, as if their entire demographic does not know what Operation is), Hanna finds a package hidden in the doll that says “Wear Me”.

When Hanna shows Caleb what was in the package, he comments that it’s super short; like people will see things that should absolutely be covered in an investor meeting... Just realized I never mentioned the meeting. The investors want to meet with Hanna to discuss the theft accusation. Luckily Lucas is a part of it and is looking out to her. Anyway, Hanna says the length is the least of her problems because the dress is one of those Japanese-inspired looks and the investors are, you guessed it, Japanese. She knows it’s offensive and she figures it’ll ruin her career before it barely started.

Spencer: Finally, Spencer seems to have a reduced role this episode. I’m so tired of her and I’m pretty sure Troian Bellisario is too. At the coffee shop, Toby runs into Spencer; Yvonne is awake and he’s hoping she can come by the hospital to visit. Detective Marco Furey is there and joins them. He tells Toby he’s happy to see him on his feet and that everyone is hoping for a good recovery for Yvonne. Toby thanks him and leaves to go back to the hospital. Furey apologizes to Spencer for the lack of progress on the case and asks if she got his message about a friend who’s good at tracking people down. Spencer says she got it, but she’s thinking she needs to focus more on people who aren’t missing. Thank you Spencer, progress. Furey asks her if she wants to hang out for the day.

They go to this…I don’t know what it is. Community youth center? They play ping pong and flirt a bit. She’s having a good time and doesn’t notice Aria or Emily calling her throughout the day. And really, those two need to do things for themselves anyway; they can handle what they’re doing without Spencer. Give her a break before she gets more annoying.

Spencer thanks Furey for bringing her and she says she needed a win. They talk, standing all close. But then he notices that Spencer’s shoulder is bleeding and goes to get some first aid material. This is the most consistent the show has been in quite some time – she’s still not 100% after getting shot. While Spencer is waiting, she sees a picture that the detective drew as a child. When he comes back to help her, she brings up the picture. He says he used to go there as a child because his mom was addicted to pain pills; the director of the center was like a second mother to him and after she passed away they never took the picture he drew of the two of them down. He tells her that the situations can be tough, but basically you love the people who love you. In other words, Spencer, stop taking up time with your identity crisis or whatever and gain some perspective. They kiss. Meanwhile…

Toby and Emily talk at the hospital; I always like when the writers remember that these two were good friends. Speaking of talking, Yvonne hasn’t, up until this moment where she calls for Toby. When he goes in to talk to Yvonne, he suggests that they forget about waiting and just get married. So they do. That wedding scene is cut between scenes of Spencer and the detective kissing.

Emily and Aria: Since everyone is ignoring these two, they just hang out with each other and actually do something productive. They track down Sydney and Emily goes to distract her while Aria uses some hacking gear that Caleb gave her that morning. He also taught her how to use it that morning too. Emily asks Sydney about Jenna and Sydney says she didn’t know what she was getting into when she was helping Jenna; apparently she was in town and Jenna suggested she help her with a prank. She says she thought it would be funny. This character is what, 22, now? Get over it, seriously, it’s been five years and they haven’t done anything to you. Anyway, she says she regrets ever helping Jenna and Emily is like, “Yeah, I bet you do regret it, considering Spencer got shot and Noel died.” Hey so wait – she’s an accessory to this crime, but considering the circumstances, she could probably get off with a slap on the wrist while Jenna is rightfully arrested. But of course, that’s assuming she’s telling the truth and well, the title of the show.

Sydney leaves and Emily goes back to her car to see if it worked with Aria. Aria hacked Sydney’s phone and she has access to her schedule; she’s going to the eye doctor. Of course she is. They follow her and listen in to her paying for eye surgery for Jenna. She says to just put the name down as A.D., anonymous donor. When she leaves, they see that she gets a text asking if “it’s done”.

Surprisingly, Emily and Aria decide not to screw around and actually confront Sydney. She seems surprised that they’re there and they tell her they followed her. The other girls may be playing, but Emily and Aria don’t have time for this shit.

Sydney insists that she’s just trying to tie up her loose ends and cut ties with Jenna. She suggests they do the same and leaves. During the encounter, Aria slipped a GPS tracker into Sydney’s stuff. But what happens if Sydney switches bags?

Caleb went back to Spencer’s to check out the game. Spencer comes home, surprised to see him there. Hanna couldn’t give her a warning? Caleb apologizes for being there and says that he expected to be finished way earlier. He says if it’s weird then he can go. Spencer says she doesn’t want it to be weird and she wants it to work; Caleb wants the same. She goes to the kitchen to get them drinks and tells him she spent all day hanging out with a guy. Caleb asks if it’s “the cop” and he says he picked up on some vibes. He wants to make sure that she’s being treated well and she says she is. She goes back to the kitchen asking if he’s eaten and suggesting takeout and inviting Hanna to join. However, as her back was turned, Caleb tried taking the buildings off the game board and when he pried it off, gas came out and caused him to have trouble breathing. Spencer turns around to see him and calls for help.

While that was happening, Hanna and Lucas go to The Radley with some of her clothes and her sketchbook. Lucas thinks showing the other investors her work (particularly some things that look similar) can help her case. Hanna is wearing a coat over the dress; that would be a good loophole – she wore the dress like AD wanted, but AD never said not to wear anything over it. Before they get on the elevator, Hanna thanks Lucas for all of his help and support, and says no matter what happens she values his friendship. Lucas is optimistic that it’ll go well. But then Hanna gets a text saying that Caleb is in the hospital. Lucas tells her to give him the sketchbook and go be with Caleb.

At the hospital, Caleb asks Hanna how the meeting went and she tells him she didn’t go. Caleb realizes that means that she missed her turn and asks what happens when they don’t play the way AD wants. Hanna says she has no idea, but she quickly figures it out when she leaves the room and gets a message saying she lost her puzzle piece.

Everyone else is in the waiting area and Spencer is sticking up for Hanna having to tell Caleb. Hanna comes over and shows them the message. Spencer says the game gives them these impossible situations and Hanna says some more than others. Hanna finds it unfair that all Spencer had to do was talk to a friend when her challenge was putting her career on the line; while true that that’s unfair, I’m not seeing how that’s Spencer’s fault.

Everyone parts ways, with Hanna going back to Caleb. Emily and Aria get a notification from the GPS showing that Sydney is on the move; Emily says she’ll keep watch on her for this first night and tells Aria to head home. Spencer decides she’ll go visit Toby and Yvonne.

Now while all of this was going on, the concurrent storyline had Toby and Yvonne talking about their honeymoon. It’s cute and heartfelt. Yvonne is pretty weak while she’s talking and Toby has this sad smile. When she’s done talking she loses consciousness and drops her flowers.

When Spencer heads towards Yvonne’s room, she sees Toby come into the hallway and she can tell something is wrong. He collapses in tears and she hugs him while he cries. I have a feeling Toby knew it was going to happen based on how he was looking at Yvonne, but man is it terrible that they didn’t even get 24 hours.

As Aria is walking into the loft, she’s leaving Ezra a voicemail about the coffee shop. She explains that Sabrina got an internship in Atlanta so she quit, but she left recommendations. However, Aria doesn’t even know how to conduct an interview for a baker and beyond that has no idea how to run a business. It did not occur to me that Ezra did just leave her saddled with that whole responsibility and no actual guidance. Soon Aria realizes that she’s not alone in the apartment and picks up a large kitchen knife and turns on the light to see who’s there. It’s Nicole! Ezra seriously, pick up a damn phone. Why does no one on this show warn others about exes being in their house?

Lastly, at Rosewood P.D., the detective opens a package with some other police officers that is clearly from AD; looks like we have a toe. He says to get forensics on it. But AD, while setting off this thing to implicate the others, it appears that you’ll end up implicating yourself.

[briannaslist]

Chapter 13: The Sweet Hereafter

A Rverdale Recap

I can’t believe we’re already at the end of the season. It felt like it was so fast. I know it was only 13 episodes, but the way the breaks stretched it out made these last three episodes feel rushed. But it’s a wonderful finale and I look forward to the second season. Oh, and if you haven’t heard the news, Riverdale’s second season will be a full episode order and it’ll be back in Fall. (Cole Sprouse’s statement on the second season renewal) This episode is packed and this recap is long:

Jughead and Alice do the opening narration for this one and it’s so good. The big, overarching synopsis: The true Blossom business was transporting heroin; Clifford Blossom killed Mustang and staged it to look like an overdose; Clifford also orchestrated events to implicate Hiram as the person behind the murder; F.P. was hired to do the cleanup of the body.

Now the mayor is freaking out all the corruption in Riverdale and she wants it crushed. Super ironic considering this is the same mayor who accepted a bribe. But the sheriff has to do something, so he offers a deal to F.P.: If F.P. tells him which Serpents are dealing the heroin, then they can negotiate a lower sentence. All of this is being done with Jughead also present, which seems unprofessional. Then again, it is Sheriff Keller. F.P. says that the Serpents don’t deal hard drugs; the most they’ve ever done is weed. And even if they did, he’s not giving any names.

Archie finds Fred looking wistfully outside of the kitchen window. When Archie comes in, Fred says he was thinking of how the town isn’t has nice and innocent as he once thought. Archie feels bad about his friends still being stuck in the mess. Fred tells him that they’re all still in it. Fred’s being weirdly ominous; he’s kind of like this for the entire episode. He doesn’t really seem like himself.

Meanwhile, Hermione is setting up everything for Hiram’s arrival. They’re expecting him at the end of the month and she wants everything perfect. Veronica, on the other hand, does not seem nearly as happy about Hiram returning.

On the walk to school, Betty tells Archie how she hates the way her family is all back together and pretending like everything is perfect. She says not sharing their problems is how they ended up in such a bad state in the first place. So much set up.

At school, Veronica tells Archie that they need to come clean to Betty about their sort-of relationship. Archie agrees that Betty should know, but as quickly as Veronica wants to share. Veronica says she’ll just tell Betty herself. Their conversation gets cut short when Archie and Betty are called to the principal’s office.

Mayor McCoy is in Principal Weatherbee’s office, excitedly telling Betty and Archie about the Riverdale Jubilee coming up. How many events does this place have in the span of a single month? How was anyone complaining about it being a “boring” or “sleepy” town? Mayor McCoy wants Archie to perform with Josie and the Pussycats and she wants Betty to give a speech. Archie asks about including Jughead since he was a major part of solving the mystery. However, Mayor McCoy says that with Jughead’s father in prison it would be “confusing” to have him speak. Both Betty and Archie find that completely unfair, so Betty tells the mayor no.

They tell the others about the meeting at lunch and Jughead says she didn’t have to do that on his behalf. Archie changes the subject and asks how things went with F.P. that morning. Jughead tells them that Sheriff Keller wants F.P. to name names and that F.P. wasn’t budging. Betty says that she’s going to write a story about everything; she wants to know why everyone is so afraid of the truth. Veronica uses that opportunity and says, “Speaking of truth…” and she actually stands up at the table for this. It’d be funnier if she wasn’t so nervous. Actually no, it’s still pretty funny that she stood up. As she’s standing Archie is shooting her looks like, “No, stop,” but she keeps going and Archie fills in and says that they’ve kissed a few times. Betty smiles and tells them that it’s okay, she’s with Jughead now, and she’s happy that they’re happy.

Meanwhile at Thornhill, in the barn, Penelope and Cheryl are in their funeral attire. Penelope is going on about how Clifford would have had a grand funeral before all of this and instead he was buried like a pauper. Then she gets annoyed by Cheryl’s crying. She gets annoyed by her daughter being upset about the father that she loved being the killer of her twin brother. Then she goes on to say maybe they’ve been cursed ever since one grandfather killed the other. Then she says she wonders who will be next, her or Cheryl. Then she goes on to say that maybe Cliff had the right idea to “end it all, instead of being stuck in limbo.” People like Penelope should absolutely never be parents.

When Archie and Betty are alone, Archie asks her if she’s actually okay with him dating Veronica. She promises him that she is okay with it. Archie says that’s good, but then he says something a little interesting: he likes Veronica, but “a part of [him] always thought…” and Betty seems to pick up on where Archie is going with it and she shuts him down before he can finish. She says that they’re both so lucky to have found someone and that they’re all friends. Seems like Archie may be the one with the problem.

Meanwhile at Andrews’ Construction, things between an Andrews and a Lodge aren’t going as well. Fred is very upset to find a new crew working there. Hermione fired the Serpents and hired a new crew. Fred is pissed about the lack of loyalty and says the Serpents were a good crew and Hermione says they need to keep up a good appearance. Fred reminds her that they’re a team and that she doesn’t get to make decisions alone like that. Hermione uses that opening to tell him that she and Hiram wants to buy out his company. Fred tells her to make him an offer in writing.

Archie is showing Josie his newly written song and she compliments how far his writing has come. Archie asks if they can sing it, but Josie says that it’s too personal to perform at the jubilee.

Betty is also getting complimented on her writing, by Alice and Hal. They like the article she wrote (which she must have written in record time because I swear this is the same day that she announced that she was writing it) however, Alice won’t publish the article. The reason is the same as Archie’s – it’s too personal. Alice says it’ll just look like she wrote it as a favor to Jughead; beyond that, it’s very favorable to the Serpents and her parents worry that it would make her a target. Ever since the sheriff and mayor decided to “crack down on corruption”, the town has been taking out their anger on the Southside Serpents.

Veronica walks into the locker room and finds Cheryl. She apologizes for being late, but Cheryl isn’t fazed by it at all. She tells her that she announced to the rest of the River Vixens that she wants to make Veronica the new director, and they all accepted. I’m sure they did, since Cheryl is such a diva. Cheryl gives Veronica her HBIC shirt and Veronica is very surprised and confused by the gesture.

When Veronica and Betty are hanging out in Betty’s room, Veronica says that she thinks Cheryl’s behavior is indicative of some very weird happenings at Thornhill; weirder than the usual. Betty brushes it off and says that everything is weird in town. Betty tells Veronica that she published her article on the school newspaper website. Then Veronica asks her if she’s actually okay with her and Archie; Betty has probably grown tired of the topic, but she promises her that she is fine with it. Polly sees them hanging out and says that she misses stuff like hanging out and school. Betty tells her to come to school and says what her mom doesn’t know won’t hurt her.

But Betty how would Alice not know about that? She’s gonna know if her kid returns to school. And seriously what has Polly been doing with education this whole time?

Archie and Jughead come home happy and are quickly deflated by meeting Jughead’s case worker. That had to be coming soon, but wow was it fast. Archie asks if Jughead can just stay there, but Fred said his offer was denied because of his financial situation and a prior DUI. There’s gotta be more to that last part, but it won’t be this season because this episode is packed. The case worker tells Jughead that there’s a family on the Southside that will foster him, but he will have to transfer schools; unless something radically changes in F.P.’s case, he’ll be in the new home by the end of the week. And spoiler alert – given the nature of the show, things continue to be realistic and there is no drastic change.

Archie can’t accept Jughead leaving for a new family and school, so he visits F.P. and tells him all about it. Archie says F.P. needs to take the plea deal to get his sentence down from 20 years. F.P. says that Jughead knows what’s up and he can’t betray the Serpents. He tells Archie that the Serpents will help when the time comes. He tells Archie to keep doing what he’s doing – look out for Jughead because he has some darkness in him and he’ll try to push everyone away.

Since everyone else is busy, it’s just Jughead and Veronica for lunch. She tells Jughead that they actually have something in common and Jug asks if it’s the fathers in jail thing; Veronica says it was actually the “dating best friends” thing, but they’re able to have a laugh at their family situation. Only those two could laugh at something like that. I really like this dynamic. We didn’t get a lot of these two interacting; I hope there’s more of it in season two. Cheryl comes to their table and apologizes to Jughead for hitting him the other day and gives him her treasured spider brooch. Cheryl’s making peace with people and giving away prized possessions – big red flag there. Veronica thankfully picks up on it and asks Cheryl what’s going on. Unfortunately, they get cut off by Kevin running in and telling them they need to hurry to Betty’s locker.

There’s a huge crowd in front of Betty’s locker, and Betty and Polly are staring at the locker. Written on the locker is “Go to hell serpent slut.” It’s written in pig’s blood and there’s a Betty doll hanging from a noose because everything in Riverdale is excessive. It also doesn’t make sense because Betty’s from fancy Riverdale. Stupid vandal.

When they’re out of school, Jughead says that the message on Betty’s locker is his fault and that everything is telling him that he doesn’t belong there. Betty tells him that it’s his home and he belongs there just as much as everyone else.

Hermione is still setting up the apartment to be perfect for Hiram. When Veronica comes home, Hermione asks her if she can get Archie to talk Fred into selling them the company. Veronica sarcastically says that she’ll sexually manipulate Archie and Hermione seriously responds with, “As long as you’re in control…” Veronica is horrified about her mom actually saying that and Hermione says that it’ll be best because Fred and Hiram won’t get along. That one’s your fault Hermione. She invited that conflict.

Alice is upset about Polly going to school and she got Polly to tell her everything that happened there. Betty is mad that Polly told, but there was no way Alice wasn’t going to find out. She’s nosey and more importantly, the school would presumably call about that incident. Betty tells her mom that she’s tired of all the secrets and lies and accuses Alice of being afraid of the truth. She wants to know what Alice and Hal were arguing about at Homecoming; the story that Alice stopped F.P. from finishing at awkward Homecoming dinner. Alice says that it’s none of Betty’s business. And you know what? It’s not. She’s allowed to have her private matters and past. No one owes anyone everything, not even a parent and a child.

But the next morning, Alice tells Betty what the argument was about. After being crowned Homecoming King and Queen, Alice told Hal that she was pregnant. They disagreed on how to proceed. Alice went to the Sisters’ of Quiet Mercy (the same place they sent Polly) and five months later Alice had a son. They arranged for a quiet adoption; she says it’s her greatest regret.

As the Cooper mother and daughter grow closer, the Blossom ones fall even further apart. Cheryl asks her mom if she can stay home and that things are hard for her. Penelope denies her and says that she doesn’t care how Cheryl feels.

And now for a sequence of events that are a bit rushed and are kind of frustrating:

Betty goes to school and tells Archie and Veronica about what her mom says, adding that her brother is in his early 20s. No way that doesn’t come back later. But it’s frustrating because her mom didn’t even want to think about it herself and here’s Betty telling two more people this deep secret. That’s not okay. Then Betty gets a call from Jughead, who is at Southside High; he says that’s where he belongs and that no one wants him. Wow Jughead, be more dramatic. Betty tells Archie and Veronica and Archie says F.P. warned him that Jughead would pull away; he says they need to go get him.

So the three of them go rushing out of the school (and that running scene is absolutely hilarious). But it’s the middle of the day. They go to Southside High and figure that Jughead is at lunch. When they walk in they see Jughead’s table surrounded by people from the school, laughing with Jughead about something. They’re surprised to see him getting along with people and he’s surprised to see them there.

The core group goes outside and Betty and Jughead talk alone. He says that he didn’t tell Betty earlier because he knew she would try to stop him. Pointless though, as he would have to go regardless. He promises that things won’t change between them, which is typically what one says before thing drastically change. They hug and Archie stares at them; he’s not even being subtle about it. Veronica says that Betty and Jughead are soulmates and are really lucky to have found each other. Okay, Veronica, calm down; they’ve only been dating for like a month. Though maybe she said that to redirect Archie’s thought process a little. But it isn’t working and it seems like Archie is about to break off their budding romance. However, Veronica cuts him off because she gets a text from Cheryl that says, “Thanks for trying. I’m going to be with Jason now.” They know what that one means and call out to Betty and Jughead.

The group rushes to Sweetwater River; it’s already frozen over. Man Riverdale must be really far north because it’s like October for them. They can see Cheryl in the distance, making a hole in the ice. They start moving out there, calling to her, but the ice is too thin to hold all of them. Cheryl goes under and they all start running to her. On the ice that’s too thin to support all of them.

The current has taken Cheryl under so they all spread out to look for her. Archie finds her and starts repeatedly punching the ice. He’s bloodying up his hands while everyone else cries for help, despite no one being around. And you know what makes it worse – they could have easily gotten help. All those cell phones and no one called the police when they realized their classmate was going to commit suicide?

Archie finally breaks through the ice and pulls Cheryl out. Then he gives her followed by carrying her away with his broken hand. Good thing that thin ice was thick enough for all of them.

Archie has done some really ridiculous things and he has had so many “bad friend” moments, but this negates all of that. This is the portrayal that they’ve been trying to get with Archie; the “always do the right thing” and “help as much as you can” type. There have been hints and he showed it in the past two episodes, but this was the real moment.

Veronica took Cheryl back to her place and has her warming by the fire and gives her some hot chocolate. Hermione comes in, angrily asking why Cheryl is there. Veronica is surprised by her mom’s demeanor and says that Cheryl had an accident; Cheryl tries to help by saying that she’s just going to warm up and go home. And then Veronica leaves for the jubilee. 1) Hermione Lodge is out of control and had an immediate 180 as soon as she knew Hiram was returning. Clearly this this where Veronica got her prior mean girl thing from. 2) This is hands down the worst part of the entire episode.

Cheryl should be in the hospital. And they clearly went to a doctor because Archie’s hand is in a cast in the next scene. Cheryl needed a doctor after being dragged into a river in freezing temperature and needing CPR. Also, again, it wasn’t accidental; Cheryl needs to be on a psychiatric hold. She needs help. And Cheryl cannot go back to her house. Her mom pushed her to suicide. Maybe the group doesn’t know that piece, but Veronica knows that Penelope straight up hates Cheryl. Indisputable fact. No one on this show has a worse home life than Cheryl and they’re sending her back there after what just happened? No!

How am I supposed to watch scenes like Betty worrying to her mom about her relationship and Josie letting Archie perform his song because of him helping Cheryl after something like that?

Let’s address these last pieces of the episode because it’s all set up for the next season now. Before they perform, Veronica brings up the way Archie was looking at Betty and Jughead longingly, as if he liked Betty. Archie immediately answers, “I do! As a friend.” Archie further says that he was looking at them and thinking that’s what he wants with her. A lie so convincing I think Archie believes it.

Meanwhile, Jughead goes to see F.P. Sheriff Keller was hoping that Jughead could convince his dad to give up names. Jughead tells him that he’ll be okay; the foster family is nice and he’ll survive the school. F.P. tells Jughead that he needs to answer for the things he’s done and says Jug needs to be there for his mom and Jellybean. Jughead says that he’ll do his best and F.P. pats his head and says he doesn’t have a doubt in his mind. Such a freaking sweet moment; I just want F.P. to get out on a technicality so that he can keep improving his life and be with Jughead.

At the jubilee, Archie performs and steals a glance at both Betty and Veronica. Only thing that would have made it better is if he also threw in one for Valerie. Just make eyes with every girl there. After the performance, Betty goes up for her speech. This is shaping up for a very short jubilee. The musical entertainment only performed one song.

Jughead comes in just as Betty is starting her speech. Betty gets everyone’s attention in a humorous and relatable way. Makes it hilarious when she then says that F.P. and Jughead are also part of the town and were demonized the Joneses without any real reason; and that Riverdale is also Cliff Blossom, who went and killed his kid. She says they need to do a better job as a town or else terrible things will keep happening. It takes a minute, but gets a standing ovation. The mayor must be kicking herself though.

Afterwards, Fred says he won’t be selling. Hermione tries to say that selling would be in Fred’s best interest and Fred says it sounds more like it would be in her best interest.

The group goes out for milkshakes at Pop’s while Cheryl sets fire to Thornhill as purification and cleansing.

I’ve minimized the impact – Cheryl fucking burns down her house. And watched it burn with a smile.

Thornhill is burning and Betty and Jughead are professing their love to each other and making out and quickly losing clothes. Archie and Veronica are in a similar state (minus the love profession). Something about a jubilee. Oh and it’s all set to “Believer” by Imagine Dragons. Been a while since there was a Berlanti show sex scene set to Imagine Dragons. At least I also didn’t laugh as much this time compared to the moment in Arrow. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about just look up Arrow – Radioactive.)

Betty and Jughead don’t get very far because there’s a knock on the door. Some Serpents came to the Jones’ trailer. They heard that F.P. didn’t talk; they say no matter what happens to F.P., they’ll have Jughead’s back. I love that F.P. was right before when he said the Serpents would come through. Jughead is offered a Serpent jacket and he happily takes it and puts it on. And damn does he look good; he looks right.

Archie wakes up at Veronica’s and says he needs to meet his dad at Pop’s. He kisses her goodbye and gets to Pop’s. When he walks in, Fred calls him Casanova; Archie laughs and goes to wash his hands, smiling to himself. But the joy is short-lived when he hears some strange noises outside. He walks out of the bathroom and sees a man with a gun threatening Pops.

Archie makes eye contact with Fred and Fred gives a slight shake of his head. But Fred can’t keep looking at this guy being violent with Pop’s and he gets up. The gunman refocuses on Fred and shoots him. (I just realized what Fred’s comment at the beginning of the episode about the town not being innocent was a huge flag on him.) Then the guy runs out, leaving all the money that he was “robbing”. And in case you had any doubts about it, Jughead’s closing narration says that incident was “the last piece of innocence that Riverdale had – marked by violence that was anything but random.”

[briannaslist]

Chapter 12: Anatomy of A Murderer

A Riverdale Recap

The penultimate episode. We get answers, and even more questions. But the biggest mystery is solved – Who killed Jason Blossom? Skip to the end if you’re just curious to know. Stick around for the fun leading up to the trigger being pulled.

The biggest downside to knowing when it’s the episode where you get the answers is that it can feel like it can drag along. It was actually a very good episode.

The episode picks up where the last one left off: Archie and Veronica are at Pop’s, telling Betty that the gun was a plant. Archie has had enough of being treated like the season’s selfish idiot and decides he’s going to take charge and not be an asshole anymore. First he says they need to tell their parents. Because this isn’t Pretty Little Liars and the parents, while at times questionable, are not stupid and oblivious.

They go to the Andrews’ house and tell Mary, Fred, Alice, and Hermione everything they know so far. But the parents are in denial because their perspective says that F.P. has often been in trouble with the law and any statement Archie and Veronica would make would be inadmissible anyway since they trespassed. Archie is like, “Well, we tried to include you, and I can’t speak for anyone else here, but I’m telling the police.” The one downside is that he didn’t go right away.

Let’s check in on Jughead – he’s having a rough night. He’s outside of a bus station, in a phone booth, telling his mom he bought a ticket to Toledo. However, you can tell the conversation isn’t going well because Jughead’s fragile smile falls as his mom keeps talking. Essentially she told him not to come. He hangs up and cries in the phone booth before going back into the station to change his ticket. But the bus doesn’t leave until the next morning and the lobby of the bus station is about to close. More importantly, why wouldn’t his mom want him to come. Maybe things aren’t what they seem in Toledo either; but I suppose that’s a storyline for season 2.

Veronica finds her mom searching for passports and she tells Veronica that there’s no telling what F.P. will say. The association with him is worrying for Hermione and she says that Veronica needs to pack a bag, just in case. Veronica says that they’ll look guilty if they run and Hermione says that she is guilty, using bribing the mayor for the land and paying the Serpents off as examples.

Archie and Betty are searching for Jughead and Archie figured Jughead would be at the bus station. They arrive too late and the station is closed; Archie keeps coming up with the right answer or move, but he’s just always a few moments off. Archie gets a phone call from Veronica, who needs someone to talk to.. Archie tells her that he and Betty are searching for Jughead and Veronica says she’ll meet them. Veronica thinks Jughead would be at Pop’s since it’s the only place in town open 24/7.

Sure enough, when Betty, Veronica, and Archie go to Pop’s, they find Jughead. Veronica tells Jughead that the gun that was found was a plant and that they know his dad is innocent. Kind of makes this next part awkward: F.P. confesses to everything. I mean everything. Kidnapping Jason; attempting to hold him for ransom; killing him; putting him in the cooler; dumping the body; even stealing the investigation photos from Sheriff Keller’s house and setting Jason’s getaway car on fire. So, when the core group shows up to the station and tells the sheriff that F.P. is being framed, it’s really awkward when he responds that F.P. just confessed.

The following morning, Polly joins the Blossoms for breakfast. Penelope shows her the newspaper cover with the headline story of F.P. being arrested for Jason’s murder. Polly is surprised to see that it was him and not one of the Blossoms.

In the school cafeteria, Archie, Betty, and Veronica are talking about their disbelief of the entire situation. Veronica wonders if her father paid someone to plant the gun and Archie holds her hand under the table to comfort her. Kevin comes in and asks how Jughead is doing. It’s a bit uncomfortable because Jughead is obviously not doing well and is being questioned by Kevin’s dad. Kevin tries to defend his dad and says that he’s just doing his job. And that is true; everything they found pointed to F.P. and then he confessed. The Sheriff is in the right, logistically. But Betty says that Sheriff Keller is wasting his time because F.P. didn’t do it. Their awkward conversation is broken by the huge hush that falls over the cafeteria because Jughead just walked in.

Jughead walks right up to Cheryl and tells her that he’s sorry. Cheryl slaps him in the face and starts hitting him and Archie jumps up and pulls her off him. Principal Weatherbee comes in and tells Jughead to come with him. One has to wonder why Jughead even did that; was it some misplaced guilt and he maybe wanted to be punished? Jughead is edgy, that was probably it.

Betty talks to Cheryl and says regardless of what F.P. did, that doesn’t have anything to do with Jughead. Cheryl says things are strange because everyone is coming up to her and saying that she must be relieved that it’s finally all over; she doesn’t feel like it is over. These characters are genre-savvy!

Betty then goes to wait for Jughead outside of the principal’s office. He says Weatherbee questioned him too and he’s not sure if Weatherbee or Sheriff Keller is the bigger jerk. Betty says not to listen to them and starts in again at F.P. being innocent. But Jughead is disillusioned at this point and has given up on F.P. doing right.

Fred hangs up from a phone call with Weatherbee. He tells Archie that Weatherbee is concerned for Jughead’s personal safety and thinks that he should finish out the school year at home. Archie says it’s completely unfair that Jughead is the one who got attacked at school and he’s the one being punished. But I think Weatherbee is right on this; imagine what some of the other kids would say and do to him. He already feels out of place at school and this situation certainly doesn’t help. Fred says that they need to figure out a long term solution for Jughead and Archie says that they are the long term solution. But Fred isn’t Jughead’s legal guardian and doesn’t want to be responsible for Jughead and the trouble that seems to follow his family. Unfortunately, Jughead is hearing all this and he starts to walk out of the house. Archie sees him and stops him, but Jughead tells him that he’ll sleep on the couch in the garage. Archie is pretty pissed at how Jughead is being treated. Finally solidifying that he actually is a good friend who cares.

Hal comes home and shows Betty and Alice the evidence that he stole from Sheriff Keller’s house. Betty points out that it’s strange that F.P. confessed to taking the evidence when he obviously didn’t. Hal says he has no idea why F.P. did that, but when he found out about the confession, he decided to come home to destroy the evidence. He stole it because he was afraid that it would lead back to Polly. Now for an unexpected reveal:

               Turns out that Hal’s grandfather that was murdered by a Blossom…was also a Blossom. Clifford’s grandfather and Hal’s grandfather were brothers. When the murder happened, their side of the family split from the Blossoms and took the name Cooper. So…technically Polly and Jason are relatives; this is also the reason why Hal wanted Polly to have an abortion. But you know, had Hal actually said all of this in the very beginning when Polly and Jason started dating, no one would be in this mess. “You two are related,” carries much more weight than, “I don’t like that boy so stop dating him.”

The Coopers rush off to get Polly out of Thornhill. Their arrival wakes up everyone and they have a confrontation in the foyer. Alice says they know all about the incest and the business with the grandfathers being related. They think that’s why the Blossoms had a problem with Polly, much like why Hal didn’t like Jason. But Cliff and Penelope both knew. Penelope says nothing could be more purely Blossom than Polly’s babies and Cliff says to “spare the middle-class morality” and says Jason and Polly were like “third cousins”. All the Coopers are weirded out by the conversation and Hal and Alice take Polly out of the house.

The next morning, Archie and Jughead eat breakfast with Mary at Pop’s. Mary went to see F.P. last night, passing herself off as his lawyer. She says that F.P. never budged from his story. She doesn’t think things will be going well for F.P and suggests that Jughead goes to see him before the arraignment. She does have an interesting question though – she wants to know who Joaquin is. He was F.P.’s only phone call.

Jughead takes Mary’s advice and goes to see F.P. It…does not go well. Or does it? Jughead and F.P. are very emotional and when Jughead is leaving, F.P. tells him not to come back. But there’s something about his expression that tips Jughead off to something being amiss. When Jughead leaves, he calls Betty and tells her that she was right about his dad hiding something.

Archie tells Veronica about F.P.’s phone call to Joaquin. She says Joaquin would know if F.P. was hired by her father. I am so tired of Veronica’s motivation. I can’t even be sympathetic to her issues anymore. It just seems so inconsequential to everything else that’s happening. Who cares about your dad, Veronica?

Veronica, Archie, and Kevin talk to Joaquin about F.P. Kevin says they want the truth and that he’s asking as the sheriff’s son. Which isn’t a powerful title. Literally meaningless in this context. Joaquin tells them that F.P. called him for a late night cleanup job of the body and he just assumed that F.P. is the one that pulled the trigger. Kevin angrily says, “You’re a criminal!” I mean, obviously. He’s in a biker gang. He told you that the same night you met him Kevin, you always knew. Veronica asks if it was Hiram who did it and Joaquin mentions this guy named Mustang who was talking about a rich guy and being the only other person who knew about the murder.

Veronica is insistent on talking to Mustang, so Joaquin takes them to Mustang’s residence. However, they find Mustang dead in the bathtub from what appears to be a drug overdose. Joaquin says he can’t be there and starts leaving with Kevin; Kevin tells Archie and Veronica to call his dad.

The police come to investigate what happened with Mustang; it looks like they also called Hermione and Fred because they’re there too. Under Mustang’s bed, they found a bag full of money with the initials “H.L.”. Sheriff Keller immediately accuses Hermione of being the owner of the bag and Veronica corrects him and says it must be her father’s because he was working with the Serpents. Hermione gets Veronica to shut up after that because it’s not like they actually have to answer the questions right away like that. Couple things though: 1) If you’re conducting illegal activity, why would you ever be stupid enough to give something with your initials; 2) Hermione Lodge is a very feminine woman and that was not a woman’s overnight bag; 3) Those initials could point to anyone; 4) Sheriff Keller seems like a good dad but wow is he shit at being a police officer.

Later, Kevin and Joaquin are at the bus station. Joaquin has a bag and before he leaves he tells Kevin that he should tell his friends to stop what they’re doing before they get hurt. Kevin says, “You don’t know them; just like I don’t know you.” But when Joaquin starts leaving, Kevin calls him back and kisses him. Joaquin says he’s going to miss him and then tells him there’s something else hidden that he didn’t want to mention in front of the others.

Cheryl is still feeling uneasy, so she asks her mom what Jason and Clifford were arguing about the morning that Jason got murdered. Penelope says they’ve been over this and that it was about Jason not being able to stomach the business. Which doesn’t make sense because they sell maple syrup. Cheryl knows there’s more to that and asks what it was that Jason couldn’t handle; then she takes it further and asks if he was afraid of Penelope and Clifford. Penelope is pissed at the allegation of them killing Jason and drags Cheryl out to the barn with maple syrup and says, “There’s the big secret Cheryl! Maple syrup! Drown in it.” Which doesn’t really help her, “I’m not a murderer” case, but what do I know.

Kevin tells Betty about what Joaquin said to him. Those two, along with Jughead, go looking for what Joaquin stashed. Kevin says that the phone call from F.P. was him telling Joaquin not to go with the contingency plan because it was too dangerous. Joaquin heeded the warning, which is why he didn’t mention it at first. The group finds the bag with Jason’s jacket.

Then the group gets together with Archie and Veronica in Archie’s garage. Betty discovers that there’s a hole in the pocket of Jason’s jacket. In the lining of the jacket is a flash drive. And on the flash drive is a video of the murder. After the video concludes, Betty calls Cheryl and tells her that she needs to get out of her house.

Cheryl thanks Betty and goes into the dining room where her parents are having dinner. Cheryl stands by Penelope and says, “You did a bad thing daddy. And now everyone knows.”

Alice brings the flash drive to Sheriff Keller and the mayor. The content of the video consisted of Jason tied up in the basement under the Serpent’s bar, being taunted by Mustang. Mustang leaves when Clifford Blossom comes in. Cliff takes the engagement ring from Jason and then shoots him in the head without even a second thought. Like grandfather, like grandson.

F.P. confessed to the murder because Clifford threatened Jughead’s life if F.P. didn’t confess. However, F.P. is still getting charged with a lot of other things, such as obstruction of justice, mishandling of evidence, and perjury. Though I don’t think that last one should stick because F.P. was under duress when he did that.

Veronica comes home and apologizes to Hermione for ever thinking that Hiram could have been part of a murder. Her mom says it’s okay and tells her that Hiram is coming home. I sincerely hope that that is the last we hear of Veronica’s constant, “My father, my dad,” business. She was starting to sound like Prince Zuko and wasn’t nearly as endearing or sympathetic about it.

The police go to Thornhill to get Clifford. Cheryl and Penelope are outside and they point the police in the direction of the barn. When Sheriff Keller opens the door, we see Cliff, who appeared to have hanged himself and a spilled barrel that reveals drugs. No wonder Jason couldn’t stomach the family business.

Biggest questions now: Why did Cliff kill Jason instead of just letting him leave? Did F.P. set Jason’s getaway car on fire and help with clean up? Is Cliff the person who framed F.P. and tipped the police off? Will Joaquin ever return? Can the friend group actually remain a group of five after all the unpleasantness with Sheriff Keller and F.P. Jones? And what happened in between Cheryl telling her father she knew and him hanging himself?

The season finale will be stacked.

[briannaslist]

Chapter 11: To Riverdale and Back Again

A Riverdale Recap

Archie’s mom is going to be in town for a few days and the two of them talk about his singing and songwriting. Mary tells him she would love to hear him sing and he says he’s going to be performing at the Homecoming dance, so she can see it there. In case you’re wondering why his mom would be at the dance, it doubles as alumni weekend for Riverdale High.

Hermione shares what she thinks is good news with Veronica – the statements that they both gave helped Hiram and they may let Hiram out for the time he’s already served. But Veronica doesn’t see that as good news; she asks about the other stuff that Hiram did and Hermione gets annoyed and tells her that there’s no proof of any of those accusations. It’s like Veronica has spent each episode deciding that her father is more and more guilty of crimes. I don’t think Hiram Lodge is squeaky clean and innocent, but that doesn’t mean he’s guilty of everything.

Jughead goes home and sees that the place is super clean. Even his dad is clean-shaven and wearing a nice shirt. Jughead is pleasantly surprised already, but there’s more – F.P. read his manuscript and he says that he thinks Jughead has a real gift for writing. He even paid close enough attention to ask questions. It’s bittersweet because Jughead is glad his dad is taking an interest in his writing; but F.P. is more interested in seeing what Jughead and the others know about the murder investigation. I’d like to think it’s a little of both – I feel like he still cares.

F.P. asks Jughead why he chose Jason’s murder in the first place and Jughead says it’s like the story really chose him. The story he’s writing is less, “who killed Jason?” and more “Is a place like Riverdale a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ place?” F.P. says that he thinks that’s good, but at some point he thinks Jughead should move on to different stories so that he doesn’t get stuck on this particular one.

At school, Archie talks to Veronica and seems to think something is happening between them now that they kissed. Veronica shuts him down and says that it was a nice moment but she doesn’t think that he’s boyfriend-worthy. That’s a little rough. But can we just talk about how quickly Archie moves on? Talk about a fast recovery time. The more I think about it, Archie seems like one of those people who can never be single. That may a contributing factor to why he seems to fall so hard so fast. Anyway, Archie is not taking the hint at all and suggests that they finally sing their duet and Veronica basically says, “Nah, let’s just pretend we never even had a moment,” and leaves to go see Betty.

Veronica meets with Betty and Alice in the school newspaper room. Alice wants to talk about potential murder suspects. Veronica thinks her dad could be involved and that he may have hired F.P. to carry it out. Alice thinks that could be very valid, especially because she thinks Joaquin is also involved; she wants Betty to talk with Kevin to see if they can figure out what Joaquin and F.P. were talking about that night at the party. But Betty is having none of this because she says that she trusts Jughead’s judgement on not thinking F.P. is the killer. However, keep in mind that Jughead’s only real evidence of F.P. not doing anything amiss is F.P. saying he didn’t do it. Also, it’s pretty stupid of Alice to think that her daughter would conspire against her boyfriend’s dad.

At Thornhill, Polly is snooping. Alice said that she was still in high school a few episodes ago, but I haven’t seen her doing anything related to school. This is the worst unaddressed plot point because it’s so simple. Anyway, the only thing that her snooping shows her is that Cliff Blossom has an obscene number of red wigs.

At Riverdale High, there’s more sneaking around – Veronica goes back to see Alice and tells her that she doesn’t have the same loyalty to the Jones family that Betty does, so she’s willing to help Alice investigate F.P. She thinks learning the truth about F.P. can lead her to the truth about her dad.

Everyone gets together for lunch. Cheryl interrupts the group dynamic by telling everyone that she’s bringing Polly to Homecoming and they’re going to be running for co-Homecoming Queens. Her reasoning is that Jason and Polly would have won, so this is kind of her way of honoring Jason. When she walks away, Archie asks Betty (the head of the Homecoming Committee) if he can perform at the dance. Okay, so wait, remember in the beginning when Archie told his mom that he was performing? He just did that on the assumption that Betty would just let him do it. But Betty (and Jughead) shut down Archie like, “No one wants to hear your sad, depressing music at a dance.” Veronica jumps in and says that she’s agreed to do pop covers with Archie, so Betty allows them to perform. Wow, lies all around this episode!

Veronica and Archie later talk and she says she actually wants his help “investigating” F.P.’s place. But of course Archie isn’t going to go for that because Jughead is his best friend and he says if Veronica needs answers then they’ll just talk to Jughead. Of course, that wouldn’t be indicative of anything, but the sentiment is appreciated. But Veronica just goes back to her whole, “I need to know about my dad…” thing. Amazingly Archie isn’t swayed by anything, even Veronica looking pretty.

While Betty is setting up decorations for Homecoming, Polly calls to update her on what she (hasn’t) found. Betty reminds her that the deal is that Polly comes home if she doesn’t figure it out by Homecoming. The phone call is cut short by Penelope coming in with Polly’s daily milkshake and telling her that Cliff saw her earlier; she reminds Polly that the east wing is off limits.

Jughead comes into the school gym with some Homecoming decorations, excitedly talking to Betty about the dinner that Alice invited him and F.P. over for. Betty senses some foul play with her mom, so she tells Alice she won’t be playing along. However, Alice says that Jughead was so excited when she asked and she uses that to keep Betty from saying anything to cancel the dinner.

Archie comes home, a bit weirded out at both of his parents being home, casually talking about dinner plans. Jughead comes in and Mary asks them both if they’re going to the dance; she says she and Fred are going and that she also invited Hermione.

Later that night, Archie and Jughead talk. Jughead tells Archie about how F.P. looks to be making some efforts to change and clean up his life and he thinks that maybe it’s time he goes home. But Archie is uneasy since he knows about the suspicions on F.P., so he suggests that maybe Jughead should wait to see if maybe there’s a little longer. And actually Archie is right here; best to make sure this is a consistent change. Jughead tells him it’s more than the cleaning up and he tells him how interested F.P. was in his story. Now this concerns Archie and he says he needs to “get almond milk for his mom because she likes it in her coffee and they don’t have any.” Jughead laughs about how bad of a liar Archie is and correctly guesses that he’s going to see Veronica. Aww, poor Jughead, he’s so happy and letting his guard down.

Archie goes all the way to Veronica’s apartment, during the night. He could have just stepped outside and called her, but I guess he was too hyped up. He tells her that he’s going to help her because he doesn’t like how much F.P. has hurt Jughead in the past. So, at least his motives are clear; he just wants to protect his friend. He says that Jughead can never know, and Veronica says Betty can’t know either; three guesses who finds out by the end of the episode.

Cheryl is doing Polly’s makeup for the dance when Polly suggests that they go retro to fit the dance’s theme. Cheryl thinks it’s a great idea, so they go to her parent’s bedroom to “borrow” some of Penelope’s jewelry. Well now that was a clever move Polly. While Cheryl is distracted, Polly opens some dresser drawers and asks about all the wigs. (What did she expect to find in three drawers in their bedroom?) Cheryl tells her that Blossoms live and die by their red curls. But then she gets distracted by finding the engagement ring Nana Blossom gave Jason. Polly tries to take the ring and Cheryl threatens her.

It appears that Cheryl and Polly brought this up to Penelope because Penelope tells them that Jason wanted no more to do with the family and threw the ring in Cliff’s face; Cliff then gave the ring to Penelope for safe-keeping. Then she brings Polly her milkshake and tells her to drink up.

When it’s time to leave for the dance, Cheryl is pissed because Penelope drugged Polly with the milkshake; now Polly is in a deep sleep. I take back my compliment about Polly being clever; clearly that was a fluke. Cliff mentions that he wasted all his time trying to get Jason ready for the business when he should have been focusing on Cheryl instead. They ask what she did with the ring and Cheryl says that she flushed it in order to protect them from Polly. All of this conversation is happening right in front of sleeping Polly though. Strange place for a personal conversation.

Alice, Betty, F.P., and Jughead are having dinner. Alice is not doing the best job in her questioning of F.P., but F.P. plays along, gives her short answers, and is polite. The doorbell rings, and Betty gets the door, walking back into the room with Hal. Betty invited him without Alice’s knowledge, but Alice lets him stay.

Hal “jokes” with F.P. asking if there’s any open space near F.P.’s since he’s been sleeping at the newspaper office. Then to make things more awkward, Hal brings up the brick that Alice threw through the office door. F.P. decides to add to the awkward by putting both Alice and Hal in their place by bringing up the two of them fighting at their Homecoming. Alice tells F.P. to shut up and F.P. calls her out for how she was acting in front of his son. Betty comments on what a “good idea” it was for her mom to have that dinner and suggests that they leave.

While our awkward dinner was happening, Archie and Veronica go to F.P.’s trailer. Archie knows where the spare key is kept, so they get in easily and split up to search. Neither of them found anything, but Veronica is being pushy about still searching. Archie stops her and asks if she wants her dad to be guilty. She tells him that she’s worried about how things will be when Hiram will come back. I am so tired of Veronica’s motivation, give her something else to do. Archie says that he’ll be there for her if she wants him and they kiss because that’s the best place to get romantic. They get a text from Alice and leave.

F.P. drives Betty and Jughead to the dance. Jughead asks for a minute to talk to his dad and Betty waits outside. Jughead asks if he can come home and F.P. looks so happy and says “how about if everyone comes home”. Then F.P. starts talking about moving to Toledo (which is where Jughead’s mom and sister are), but Jughead is caught off guard by the prospect of moving and he just looks at Betty.

Fred walks into the dance, holding Mary and Hermione’s hands. It’s…visually strange. Mary later runs into Alice in the bathroom. Alice brings up Fred and Hermione rekindling their romance. Mary shrugs it off and says Alice’s games were old before and they’re still old now; she’s at the dance to have fun with both of her dates. Alice rushes off when she gets a phone call.

Betty asks Cheryl where Polly is and Cheryl tells her that Polly sugar crashed and left her all alone. Then she angrily says that she won’t do anything nice for anyone again and walks off. Then Betty sees Archie and Veronica talking to her mom.

When Betty gets the chance she asks Archie and Veronica why they were talking to her mom. But Archie asks if they can “table” the discussion because he and Veronica have to perform. Betty should join Cheryl in not doing nice things.

Archie and Veronica perform in a flirtatious manner to “Kids in America”. It’s… not good, not bad. But as always, when someone is performing, shit hits the fan. So Betty watches them angrily, Cheryl watches on sadly and eventually leaves, and the police show up to search F.P.’s trailer, finding a box with a gun.

Everything was humming along at a level 9 and it’s now been turned up to 11. Kevin and Joaquin are dancing and Kevin is telling him that he’s never brought a boyfriend to a dance, which makes him realize that he’s never had a boyfriend. But that’s all the development you get for their relationship. Kevin notices that his dad is there and he leaves to go see why; when he walks away, Joaquin heads off in the opposite direction, likely already knowing what’s happening.

Betty is confronting Veronica and Archie in the hall, pissed that they were working with her mom. Jughead comes out and when he sees how weird everyone is being, you can just see his spirit already falling. Archie tells him what he and Veronica did, and tries to explain why but Jughead cuts him off and asks how they even knew when to go there. Then Veronica says that they knew F.P. would be at dinner with the Coopers. So of course Jughead then looks at Betty and wonders if she was a part of it and she says she had no idea that’s what they were doing. But Jughead doesn’t believe her and says that he can’t believe he was rethinking moving with his dad for her and Betty starts crying and apologizing and saying that she wanted to support his happiness. Jughead counters that she knew her mom was up to something and says she should have warned him that the dinner was a set up.

But then Jughead is faced with something much worse than his relationship falling apart. Kevin comes out with the parents and tells them that F.P. has been arrested for the murder of Jason. So Jughead runs out, crazy upset.

Betty asks Alice if she tipped off the Sheriff. Alice says that she didn’t, but she’s glad that Betty is done with Jughead, as nice as he is. Betty says she’s not done with Jughead, she loves him, and at this point he’s more her family than Alice is. It feels a little quick for all the love stuff, but at least Betty and Jughead have known each other for a while, unlike many other teen shows. This feels more realistic. Betty leaves to look for Jughead.

Mary talks to Archie. She says that F.P. always had his demons. She tells him that she wants him to come with her to Chicago because she doesn’t think that Riverdale is safe anymore; true, beautiful irony there. Archie says that he understands, but the only thing on his mind right now is Jughead. We finally got another episode where Archie a good friend to Jughead. He’s just a little late.

Cheryl watches her mom sobbing and being comforted by Cliff about the news of the killer being caught. She seems almost a bit happy at her mom’s despair; or perhaps she’s just happy because she still has the ring.

Betty goes to Pop’s and asks him if he’s seen Jughead. Pops tells her that he hasn’t, but that she’s not the only one looking, and gestures over to Archie and Veronica. Betty is super unhappy to see them, but they drop the bombshell – Kevin told them about the box with the gun. But they never saw that when they were searching, meaning it was planted after they left. F.P. is being framed.

[briannaslist]

Chapter 10: The Lost Weekend

A Riverdale Recap

I’m going off of memory for this one, instead of my notes, so I’m probably going to miss some stuff. Sorry in advance.

It’s Jughead’s birthday and Jughead hates his birthday. That’s essentially the whole episode. He likes it as low-key as possible. He and Archie check out whatever double feature is at the movie theater and he’s content.

Archie decides to tell Betty about it being Jughead’s birthday. His girlfriend does not even know, that’s how much Jughead does not like his birthday. The group gets together for lunch (sans Jughead for some reason). Chuck is back at school and the group just kind of stares him down in this Pretty Little Liars-esque way. Totally forgot about Chuck and his suspension. How long was he suspended? Was it a week or so? Is that really all the time that has passed these few episodes? At this rate the show could go ten seasons. Anyway, the last we saw and heard of Chuck, Jughead was saying in his narration that there would be a fallout soon to come from the justice that Betty and Veronica got on him; I guess this is that episode.

So they all watch Chuck come in and head straight for Ethel’s table. Ethel is sitting there alone and Chuck sits across from her. None of the core group like the look of that, so Betty goes over there to see what’s up. But when she walks over there, things are very strange. Chuck says he’s just there to apologize and Ethel brushes off the concern. The whole thing looks so sketchy. Betty goes back to her table.

Betty brings up Jughead’s birthday and suggests that they have a surprise party. Archie immediately shakes his head and says “No, not a good idea. I told you before he hates his birthday.” And Betty’s like, “Well let’s make him like his birthday. He’s never had a birthday party and we should do this for him.” And Archie still is like, adamantly against this. Meanwhile Veronica is all, “Oh I’m so in, I have a cute new dress I want to wear,” and Kevin is like, “No one who says they hate their birthday and surprises actually means that; he totally wants a party.” Kids, if someone tells you that they do not like parties, surprises, or their birthday, then respect that; if they’re lying to “test” you with mind-games, then that is even more reason not to do it. Archie actually agrees to it despite spending that whole time saying that it was a bad idea. Archie can’t even listen to his own cautions. I’m so disappointed; I was really proud of him up until that point. Now I’m going to be mad at him for the duration of the episode.

Switching gears to Ronnie’s Rotten Life –At some point, Archie tells Veronica what he heard Cliff and Penelope Blossom saying about being the reason Hiram is in jail at all. Veronica feels she needs to get her revenge somewhere, so she goes with Cheryl – the one person who couldn’t have done anything.

When Veronica gets to cheerleading practice, she and Cheryl have a confrontation that leads to a “dance off”. Nothing about this dance off makes any sense; it’s actually quite bad. I felt embarrassed to watch this. These don’t look like dance moves for any cheer routine ever. They’re both moving very slowly and the moves are way too over-the-top sexual for any high school team. The River Vixens vote on who they would rather have lead the routine and predictably pick Veronica. What’s more surprising is that Betty is still a member of the River Vixens. Here I thought she quit after the second episode.

Cheryl is really pissed about getting upstaged and not having anyone vote for her. She “fires” her two right-hand minions and goes about her own revenge. This leads to her approaching Chuck for a team up. While she admits that she thinks he’s vile, she knows he can help her.

Meanwhile, Veronica and Hermione go to the lawyer to talk about Hiram’s case. Veronica is privately informed that if she doesn’t testify for her dad, then her mom may be implicated; this is a message from Hiram himself, so Veronica is understandably very upset.

The surprise party is being held at the Andrews’ because Fred is in Chicago with Archie’s mom, working on their divorce. Archie, Kevin, Joaquin, and Ethel are inside. When Ethel hears someone outside, she assumes it’s Jughead and Betty returning from their movie and yells “Surprise!” when the door opens. But it’s Veronica all in a pissy mood. Moments later, Jughead and Betty actually do arrive, and Jughead clearly isn’t happy about this. He’s very uncomfortable. In fact, his behavior and words even suggests that he only puts up with the other members of his friend group because of Betty and Archie. I’m convinced Jughead does not care for more than half of the people in this room.

Oh! Also, Archie is in a bit of a mood too about the divorce. His parents have been separated for two years and he even said he’s not really upset about them moving on, but he’s feeling some weirdness. So he snuck a drink. And when Veronica came in, she also snuck into the liquor cabinet because of her bad mood. Cause why not? When Archie hugs Jughead, Jughead can immediately tell that Archie has been drinking, making things even more uncomfortable. Basically, the entire episode is awkward. There’s just too much tension.

Betty gets Jughead’s cake, which is shaped like a burger, and walks out singing happy birthday. Jughead tells her that her singing was haunting and she says to make a wish. He whispers to her that he wishes it was just the two of them and blows out the candles. Veronica walks off to the kitchen to cry about her life and Archie follows her.

Veronica tells Archie what happened and he hugs her. She says she’s not in a party mood. Yeah, neither is the guest of honor, so why the fuck did you come? If you don’t feel like a party, then don’t go to the party; Jughead would not miss you. Things then get worse as the doorbell rings. Archie opens the door to see Chuck and Cheryl with a crowd behind them. You know, because on TV everyone shows up to the party at the same time. Moose asks Archie where he wants the keys and Archie says, “Screw it, one in living room, one in the backyard.”

“Screw it, one in living room, one in the backyard,” he said, about a party for his best friend that he knew the friend did not want. Jughead wasn’t even happy with like seven people there; he sure as hell is not going to be comfortable with a full party. Also, Chuck and Cheryl’s entire plan hinged on Archie saying to come into his house? What if Archie hit his head and was being smart that day and said, “Nah, go away?” Would they then say, “Aw, revenge plan over?” and cut their losses. What a weird plan.

Jughead hangs out in the garage with Archie’s dog. F.P. finds him in there and gives him a gift. Note: Betty called F.P. to invite him to the party and F.P. also said that it was a terrible idea. It couldn’t have been stressed to her enough not to do this. F.P. wanted to at least come show Jughead he cared and hey, a gift! Jughead tells him where Betty was collecting the gifts and F.P. leaves to add his, saying he’ll be right back. Though it would make sense to leave the gift with Jughead instead of in some unsupervised location surrounded by drunk teenagers.

F.P. goes inside the house and sees Joaquin and Kevin kissing. He makes a comment about young love and then asks to talk to Joaquin. F.P. and Joaquin go upstairs to talk in Archie’s room. Across the street, Alice Cooper is in Betty’s room and is watching them talk. Joaquin gives F.P. the update on everything the group knows and F.P. says they’re more informed than the sheriff is and that he needs to stick around to see what else they know.

Archie is outside, very drunk, and is trying to talk to Valerie. But Val keeps rebuking him and saying she doesn’t want to talk. However, Archie’s whole goal is to get Valerie back. At one point, he even went into the garage to talk to moody Jughead about whether he thought Val would take him back; didn’t even care about his friend being upset. Anyway, he’s too persistent and Val is like, “what the hell is your problem” and she throws her drink on him. Archie is embarrassed and upset so he goes upstairs and calls his dad.

Betty goes to talk to Jughead and he’s pretty much had enough at this point. He reiterates that he didn’t want a party and she tries to tell him that she didn’t know all of those people were going to show up; however, she also doesn’t understand what the big deal was anyway and doesn’t get why he doesn’t enjoy any of this. Gee, maybe it’s because some people don’t like parties or crowds or when their wishes are ignored? Some people honestly just want to do something simple with few to no people. It’s like when some couples take separate vacations or travel without their kids. It’s nice to be alone. But because Jughead is upset, he decides to hit where it hurts.

So Jughead accuses Betty of throwing the party to boost her own ego about being a good girlfriend or whatever. He says the people out there are not his friends and don’t even like him. He says he doesn’t fit in and that he’s weird and it makes no sense for them to even be dating because they’re too different, from personality to social class. Then he asks if she even likes him or if she’s just using him to pass the time until Archie decides he likes her back. Just, all the insecurities in one fell swoop. He went a bit too far in all of that; Betty should have been more mindful, but she didn’t deserve that. Betty’s hurt, he’s hurt, and she walks out. Then he goes into the house, through the kitchen, and tries to leave the party.

However, he cannot leave the house because Chuck comes and blocks his way. Never mind that F.P. is standing right there and can demand that Chuck let his son out of the house; never mind that Jughead came inside of the house through the back door and could just walk out that way. Never mind that Jughead has nothing to do with anyone else’s vendetta. Nope, he’s stuck forever as Cheryl locks the door from the inside. She suggests they all play a game. And everyone goes along with it!

They all congregate in the living room, Jughead included, to play a secret-revealing game. And F.P. hasn’t done anything about this because he needs to see what everyone knows. And it appears that no one is concerned about this adult at the high school party. Dilton Doiley of all people jumps in, due to being drunk. He says that he saw Grundy’s car at Sweetwater River the morning of July 4th; everyone immediately puts it together that Archie was screwing Ms. Grundy. Perceptive teenagers.

Cheryl goes next and goes after Veronica, so Veronica comes back with Cheryl potentially being jealous of Polly because she loved Jason a little too much; feelings that a sister shouldn’t have. I cannot believe they actually addressed the weirdness of the relationship between the Blossom twins. At this point, Cheryl has basically played herself. Chuck decides to go after Betty and talks about how she dressed all sexy and tortured him in the hot tub with maple syrup and then tries to get in Jughead’s face about Betty being a “psycho”. Jughead has had enough, so he punches Chuck and the two get into a fight. Someone should have punched Chuck long ago. And you know what, same for Cheryl. F.P. breaks up the fight and declares the party over.

Everyone is leaving Archie’s house and Jughead tries to dip out too, but F.P. stops him and tells him to go back inside and talk to Betty. Jughead goes back in and Alice comes across the street to be confrontational with F.P. This woman is incapable of being cordial with any adult. She says that she doesn’t want him in her neighborhood and F.P. tells her she’s still hot, but it’s a shame about her personality; then he alludes to her being from the Southside. Oooh! Wait, I want to know more about this one. I want a flashback episode about all the adults, played by the younger cast.

Betty and Jughead go to Pop’s and have a mature conversation where they work out their differences. She reveals her anger issues and shows him the healing cuts on her palms from when she was angrily clenching her fists when talking to Chuck earlier at school. They have a new understanding; my goodness an actual teen relationship portrayed with maturity.

Archie and Veronica talk about their personal problems; he tells her that he called his dad to ask him not to get divorced even though he doesn’t really care about that happening. Veronica shares her family concerns too and they end up kissing. The next morning Veronica wakes up in Archie’s bed and sees Archie asleep on Jughead’s air mattress. So... where did Jughead sleep? Veronica gives Archie a kiss on the forehead and sees Jughead eating his cake on her way out. I love that he’s having cake for breakfast.  Jughead gives her a knowing look and they exchange a smile.

Veronica decides to testify for her father and as a “thank you” gift from him, she receives new pearls. But she clearly still feels uneasy about the whole situation. Meanwhile, Archie is cleaning up the kitchen while Jughead is still eating his cake. Jughead asks about Veronica and Archie just kinda has this happy smile. Valerie who? Jughead promises not to say anything about Veronica staying there overnight. Then Archie’s dad comes home, with his mom in tow.

But most importantly – what was Jughead’s gift from F.P.?