An Ode to Sisterfriends
I recently wrote a piece on lessons of loss and I was so beautifully overwhelmed at all of the messages I received. It’s always scary to put a piece of your heart out there, no matter how small, but it is so rewarding when it softly lands on the heart of another, and resonates. It makes it all worth it and reminds me of the importance of telling ones story.
One message touched me in a special way. It read (as a caption of a picture of the sender, with tissue in her hand and her hands in the air):
That’s my hallelujah moment after reading your blog. Aawii all tissues! I think your testimony healed something in me or at the very least helped me get clarity on some things. So much to say but this is what Marianne Williamson expressed when she said when we allow ourselves to be, we give other people the courage to be them (my own words!)
She was referring to Marianne Williamson’s words in “A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles.” The specific passage reads: ”As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
I wasn’t moved by her message because I am by any means liberated from my own fears, because I am not, or because I was intentional about letting my light shine when I wrote that piece, because I was not. What moved me the most about the message was that she had no idea she was the one of the reasons I had written that piece.
My sisterfriends are very different personalities but one thing they have in common is that they are unapologetically living out their own truth. They may not be liberated from all their fears yet, but they are not ashamed of the process. They are proud of their journey. They are living it out beautifully and courageously in spite of the lemons that are thrown their way.
My sister circle is a safe space of strength, of vulnerability, of pain and of power, of tears of joy and tears of boy, long tight swaying hugs, loud and pitchy sing-alongs, long spiraling conversations about everything and nothing, fights and breaks, heartbreaks and dancing.
My sisterfriends have made me a better woman. They have checked me when I needed checking. They have taught me how to love deeper and truer by loving me deeply and truly. When I questioned my own strength, they reminded me of when I was at my strongest. When I was afraid to feel and share my pain, they shared theirs with me. When one of us cannot pray, we pray for each other. With no words at all, they make everything okay. Whether it is by making comfort food or comfort cocktails, or buying a dozen lemons so we can literally make lemonade, they make going through life a whole lot of fun.
My sisterfriends are my partners in life. We are partners in figureitoutizaton.
They are not afraid of their fears, and therefore they have been unconsciously liberated from them. Their vulnerability is their most accurate measure of courage (BreneBrown). Their values and principles have held me to a higher standard and my values and principles have held them to a higher standard.
We have fallen, and we have picked each other up again. We have not given up on each other. And it is because of them, that I am able to tell my story. Their tests and testimonies have not only given me strength to face my own, they give me strength and hope, and allow me to unapologetically live out my truth. They let their light shine everyday, and by doing so, they unconsciously give me permission to do the same.
I tell my story so it can maybe liberate others because I have a sister circle whose stories have liberated me.
A circle of women may be the most powerful force known to humanity. If you have one, embrace it. If you need one, seek it. If you find one, for the love of all that is good and holy, dive in. Hold on. Love it up. Get naked. Let them see you. Let them hold you. Let your reluctant tears fall. Let yourself rise fierce and love gentle. You will be changed. The very fabric of your being will be altered by this if you allow it. Please, please allow it. ~ Jeannette LeBlanc
