Kickin' rad subtleties.

Dirk | 26 | Rated M | WA Pony enthusiast. Puppet entrepreneur. Screw descriptors. As if the shits I give ain't nil. M!A: none

[bronisms]

Maybe. No, hear me out here. Maybe if you sent the damn thing I would.

[ellbends]

[carcinogenicgallantry-deactivat]

AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE, I JUST ASSUME MY EXISTENCE HAS BEEN PAST-FORTH PAINSTAKINGLY AND SUCCINCTLY RENDERED TO ACT AS THE PICTURE-PERFECT TEMPLATE FOR AGONY’S VARIOUS MANIFESTATIONS ACROSS GALAXIES AND SPANNING LIMITLESS TIMELINES. 

I HAVE BEEN SELECTED BY SOME CRUEL SKIPPER OF DIVINITY TO LEAD A LIFE OF PANTS-SHITTING HUMILIATION AND A TRIDENT’S WORTH OF WANTON PAINS, THE LATTER OF WHICH ROUTINELY DISPATCHED AT THE LEAST FORTUITOUS MOMENTS OF MY LIFE, LIKE PUBERTY, OR WHEN MY APARTMENT WAS BROKEN INTO AT THREE AM BY A LARGE INTERDIMENSIONAL HOBGLOBIN WHILE I WAS TRYING TO WATCH RERUNS OF MAURY AND I SIMULTANEOUSLY GOT PUNCHED IN THE FACE AND HAD MY TV BROKEN. 

I HAVE NOT HAD 

ONE

MOMENT

OF FUCKING

PEACE. NOT ONE! NOT ONE, IN MY ENTIRE LIFE.

NOT A SECOND. NOT A MILLISECOND. NOT ONE OF THOSE IMAGINARY PROLONGED SECONDS WHEN YOU ACCIDENTALLY MISS A STEP DOWN A STAIRWAY AND PLUMMET TO THE TILE A MERE *THREE STEPS AWAY* FROM TANGENTIAL, VERTICALLY-ORIENTED SPINAL RELIEF. 

@timetechturntables WHERE ARE YOU, FUCKER?? @timetechturntables DID YOU REALLY THINK YOU COULD GET AWAY WITH THIS? @timetechturntables JUST HOARD-DUMP SOME OF YOUR MINDLESS ANTICS INTO MY OH-SO-CONVENIENT CHAT BOX?? @timetechturntables DO YOU REMEMBER THAT WE LIVE TOGETHER? @timetechturntables THAT I COOK YOUR FOOD WITH THESE DELICATE, GENTLE, LOVELORN, YET MERCILESSLY UNFORGIVING LITTLE TOUCH STUBS?? @timetechturntables WAS THIS WORTH A FUCKING MEME, MY FRIEND? @timetechturntables YOU DO REALIZE I AN CONTRACTUALLY OBLIGATED TO FUCKING ROAST YOU, RIGHT????????????????

???????????????????????????????????????????????????????

[bronisms]

It’s freezin’ in the damn garage. Re-insulating this whole area is my next project.

[bronisms]

As I called it. Dave made his appearance and I missed it because of my damn schedule.

[bronisms]

Take it back now y’all.

[em-htiw-klaw-erif]

Visit Original Link

Say My Name - Destiny’s Child

[bronisms]

I just sneezed so fucking hard I pulled a muscle in my neck. That was the worse experience of my life.

[bronisms]

John Harley is a disgusting menace.

[bronisms]

You're trying nothing but my patience.

[bronisms]

Anyway, that minor concern aside. The lawn mowers fixed.

[bronisms]

Funny ... I don’t remember blocking that.

[rolatoria-archive-deactivated20]

bronisms started following you

hia friend! im roxy!! nice 2 meet u 

[bronisms]

Likewise. I appreciate you being one of the few to follow first after all that pride swallowing I had to do last night. Like a gust of hella fresh air. I’m Dirk.

[bronisms]

Maybe I don't want to update to the new IOS. Y'all can't force this change on me by closing out of my apps.

[skaialabs-deactivated20190904]

What kind of work do you do?

[bronisms]

Whoa. Let’s take it slow, dial it back to a less broader range. Recreational or career wise?

[skaialabs-deactivated20190904]

You a workaholic too?

[bronisms]

Depends on your definition of it. I do take down time. 

[skaialabs-deactivated20190904]

Work work work. But it pays the bills. What keeps you from sleeping then, hun?

[bronisms]

Force of habit. Among other things any shrink would love to dig into.