Diary of a Loser

My name is Bronwyn and I am 23yrs old. This is my blog to track and keep a record of my weight loss. I will update approximately once a week with my progress. Thank you for your support. Start weight: 185.5kg (As at 02/11/15) Current weight: 177.4kg (As at 08/11/15)

[bronwynloses]

Hello friends.

SO yeah. This is again going to be my attempt to lose weight. I guess that saying, “doesn’t matter how many times you fall as long as you get back up” is relevant in this situation. The recent passing of my mum at 52 has been a massive motivation for me. I know that if I don’t do something about my weight, I too will die at 52, or younger. So I have my own “home gym” of sorts organised. I will change my eating habits. Making the necessary lifestyle changes to get the job done.

Okay, peace out xo

[bronwynloses]

okay, so this is about the 10th time i've posted on this blog saying that i'm back into the losing weight game.

but hey, i'm not giving up? it's just been a bit of a crazy on and off journey.

but yes. i am back at it. incredibly motivated by the fact that i was diagnosed with diabetes two weeks ago. so having diabetes really sucks. especially at 21. though, it was going to be a miracle if i never developed it because i was so pre-disposed, having basically every risk factor. but yes. whats done is done. all i can do now is do my best to manage it the best that i can to avoid all the shitty consequences that come with it.

following my diagnosis, i saw a dietician and i'm following a diabetic diet. it's been working really well, though its only been a week and a half. i'll be also seeing an exercise physiologist to be able to get on track with my exercise.

i ended up going back up to 150kg, meaning i've basically put back on half of what i lost. but that's not going to worry me now because i'm going to take it straight back off.

so here's to another step in this ridiculous journey. 

[blogbbf]

i’m actually really proud of how much i’ve cleaned my eating up.

[bronwynloses]

i think the scariest part of losing weight, is that you are finally admitting to yourself that you deserve better.

[bronwynloses]

sooooo i haven't been losing any weight for the last couple of months cos i've been really bad with it all, but i've just had my first day back at the gym and i'm feeling really good about it all again. i currently weigh 142.8kg which means i've put on 900g since september, which i'm 100% fine with, because i was not exercising and eating very poorly. so for it to be only 900g when i felt like i'd put on 10kg, i'm happy with that. very keen to get back into this with 100% dedication and motivation. so there will be a lot more posts happening on this blog.

thanks again to everyone who has stuck by me through this. i wouldn't be 22kg lighter today if it wasn't for you all.

[blogbbf]

i didn’t really think that my body looked all that different, that my weight loss could only really be seen in my face. so i took this photo this morning (selfies!!11!1!) so i could compare, and i guess i can actually see some progress!

[bronwynloses]

forgot to update this on tuesday aka weigh in day.

lost 1.4kg, for a total of 23.2kg lost overall. i now weigh 141.9kg. i’m almost in the 130’s!

[bronwynloses]

So proud of myself today! Not only is that the longest cardio session I've done, I also beat my record for how long I can stand being on the treadmill, just having done 30mins continuously! Plus I even did 5mins on the cross trainer aka my worst enemy. I am dead but feel so good right now!

[bronwynloses]

-20.8kg

before, and today

[bronwynloses]

so i find walking on the treadmill hard with the injuries to my knees and feet, and the longest i've done is 8mins at a time.

i had a goal today to get 10mins. which i did! and then later, i did 15min!! So I achieved my goal and then exceeded it in the day!

so i did a solid hour today and i feel exhausted but also amazing at the same time.

[blogbbf]

As much as losing this weight is fantastic for me, it is also completely terrifying at the same time.

[bronwynloses]

Just finished a good session at the gym. Put everything I had into it and now I'm dead but at the same time, I want to get going again! Weigh myself today. Lost 1.6kg which I'm so stoked about because my diet is 100% back on track yet. So now I'm weighing 143.3kg for a total of 21.8kg lost over all.

[bronwynloses]

This just isn't right. It can't be safe to have been that fast.

[bronwynloses]

ugh tried to have a good workout and only ended up doing 25mins. it's frustrating when i'm trying but i just can't do it because of my stupid heart.

but i guess the 25mins were better than nothing. 

[blogbbf]

Just a casual 4.92km walk I did this morning.

I’m feeling so good right now. When have I ever been able to say that I walked almost 5km before? Never. It took me an hour, but I don’t care about my pace, just that I did it. I got up at 5.45am on my day off to exercise. And I loved it.

[bronwynloses]

so, i'm back.

its been a long time since i updated here. i've been generally really shit with my eating and not exercising. but i'm getting back into the gym, been the last two days and i'm enjoying it.

i'm currently weighing 144.9kg, meaning i've gained 1.6kg over the last couple of months, which is actually really suprising. i'm not sure if that is 100% accurate because i'm using different scales now. but whatever. 

i'm going to start updating weekly here with my new progress. i would love to lose another 20kg before i go on my cruise at the end of january. that's 12.5 weeks away, so here goes nothing!

[bronwynloses]

i made a mistake with writing my numbers on here last week, i was actually weighing 144.4kg last week, not 143.3kg.

so now i'm weighing 143.8kg, so i only lost 500g this week. but whatever, a loss is a loss. i'm taking this all as it comes. any weight loss is my own personal gain.

i wasn't able to go to the gym as much as i've wanted, as i've been having issues with my heart rate being too fast, and so i'm not allowed to go back until i see my doctor. hopefully i'll get to speak with her soon.