Dear...b
It's been a crazy 4 years. Sometimes I think back and it still continues to make me sad. It left scars that I will never fully heal from. But I always wonder what it's like for you these days now. If you made it through your dark place. I am so happy and proud of what I have done with my life. I didn't know life could change so much. I still have my ups and my downs and I am a very blunt person when it comes to that. I immediately ask for advice from someone and take it in. It helps a lot. I have started to look forward instead of backwards and it amazes me. Years ago I thought nothing was going to change and I was always going to be miserable. Don't get me wrong this will always be a wound I will never be able to heal. But I have faith that I can change. I have a family. I have friends. I have more walls up to protect myself but it's for the better. I will never let someone be that close to me again. But it makes me much more self sufficient and stronger as a person. I panic when I see you walk by. It's happen a couple times. I guess this world will never be big enough. But I am so happy to have so many adventures. I can say I have started to live. I miss the horses. I miss the adventures and the closeness I had with you. You were my best friend. And I know I will never have that again. But I have a will to love life now. To enjoy the small things. I guess I'm just saying thank you...i miss you...hate you...but care about you. Good luck with life and I hope it brings everything that you wanted. Do I still haunt you??













