BumperJunnel @bumperjunnel-blog - Tumblr Blog

The Promise (I’m Selfish)

I’m selfish. I wanted everything

But didn’t want to be part of anything.

I wanted you beside me.

I wanted you from morning until dawn.

But I didn’t want anything with you.

After we separate, we are nobodies.

I was broken. You had problems.

I added to it, yet you kept me around.

I was broken glass; a rose with a million thorns.

But you had super glue; you held me with gloves.

I was still blind. I was blindfolded.

I thought I only had sunglasses to block your brightness.

I kept staring at the Sun, trying to see

But the more I stare, the more my vision became blurry.

Eventually, when the Sun turned into the Moon,

I saw how beautiful you were.

I saw the glow in your heart.

I finally saw you for you.

I’m sorry for taking this long.

I’m sorry for making you wait.

I am here now, with eyes open.

My hand is out reaching out.

Please let me pull you closer into my arms.

I promise to do better to you.

For now, today, tomorrow; until time lets us not to be.

The Endless Road of Thoughts

Sitting behind this steering wheel

Speeding through the darkness.

Destination? Nowhere.

Reason? Unknown.

The moon standing alone

with no stars to speak with.

Yellow lines, rare light posts;

Just empty road ahead of these headlights.

What? Why? How?

All these within my inner voice.

Who? Where? When?

All these within every heartbeat.

My voice was heard through the neighborhood.

I saw my hand raised above my head.

I shouldn’t have. I know that.

But .. but .. yeah, there’s no excuse.

So I here am, with the road of loneliness.

Isolated with my thoughts,

Contemplating the events,

Trying to understand every second the passed.

This road, this darkness;

It gave solace to my soul.

As much as it has calmed my nerves,

My light is waiting back at home.

I have to drive back; I must.

This road has succumbed me long enough.

Time to put an end to these thoughts

And hold her in my arms once again.

Stuck

I am a man. I thought I had the world. I have choices with women, I have money to spend. I even have the time to spend with friends, or at least were able to manage my time to do so. I was even going back to school, though not the path of classes I hoped, it is one small step around the path I was taking which will lead me to my eventual goal. Then, I hit a speed bump on the road. I slowed down for it, then sped up. I went faster and faster…then BOOM! There was a dip I didn’t see, and next thing you know, I am standing on the road now. I have nowhere to go now. I am… stuck.

I will not specify what dip I hit. People close to me already knows. And I will not blame anyone specific, because they are doing they think is right. But, it still doesn’t mean I am not insulted nor confused. I’ve sacrificed my body over and over and over to assure everyone is safe. I’ve become a punching bag for many people. I’ve become a scratching post to most. I was the muscle for them. I was a waiter, a nurse, a mechanic, and a plumber. I was a superhero, saving them and all. By the end of the day, I was sore, bruised, beaten, and tired. Yet even all that, my mind cannot relax. I am still thinking if everyone is okay.

But now I am…stuck. If I go on the road similar to this, well, I might hit another dip. So, there is only one route: a different one. I have to go sideways, other than going forward. Over time, I will see another road to turn into and eventually will let me go forward again. But, as of right now, I am…stuck.

#life path job stuck in my current life

Bundled thoughts...

There's been a thought that has been going through my mind whenever I would start liking someone. This is very much in parallel to a some by Tamia.

How can I miss something I never had...how could I reminisce if there is no past...

Sad to say, when I fall, I fall hard. I never know how to flirt. When I want to flirt, it comes out too strong. When I'm not trying, well that's when I do flirt, unknowingly.

I don't know what truly runs in my mind, but why do I remember things that never happened. I miss things, but it was just a dream. Falling is hard, and apparently I still found a way to not fall too hard...

#bundled thoughts falling hard

Bored at work #nofilter

#nofilter

Walking the streets to pick up the car. Saving gas, releasing gas, and exercising all at once..reminds me of days back in highschool

Fin. 7 wins, 4 losses. (at 24 Hour Fitness)

Only 1 of 3 wins... Not too bad. I won more than I expected haha #teamnoselfesteem

#teamnoselfesteem

Food of the greatest! What is it? Instant pancit canton haha

One of my favorite covers..

The simple things in life I tend to over look on a daily basis...

Done for tonight.. (at 24 Hour Fitness)

My Friday night: me and Wilson

I celebrate today not because it's Independence Day, but it's because it's your birthday. Happy birthday, Ate Joan. Though I never met you, that doesn't stop me from loving you. #eldestsister #RIP #4thofJuly

#4thofjuly #eldestsister #rip

What my afternoon consists of.. haha sad sad life.

Note to self: don't let sis sample nail polish on your nails when she buys again. #fourweeks&going

#fourweeks

Came home to this...but no ketchup. I refuse to eat this without ketchup...!!!

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