I begged finessed a business deal with my older sibling an artist previously commissioned by Hank Green. They makes a living off of nature-inspired art, and our aquarium randomly got dwarf gouramis, so I was able to casually pitch a design idea…
..and it looks SO CUTE (and DAMN the dwarf gouramis were hard to find at the aquarium because David Cage made me think they were ginormous. Dewey is a goddamn biological anomaly). I love how they just so happened to hold it in their hand. DO THEY KNOW!?! haha
I probably could’ve been upfront about my DBH obsession (especially since they backseated a playthrough I did in COVID times; they’re the only reason Kara made it out of Zlatko’s because they pulled up a guide when I forgot what to do) but I’m sooo embarrassed about how sick in the head this game makes me lmao.
They only know I’m obsessed with The Last Of Us and Breaking Bad, both of which I also got them into…
…and subsequently begged them to make another charm and entire quilt for 🤭 the quilt is my favorite thing ever and they had so many good ideas like stuffing a square to represent when Jesse inflated his hazmat suit, a Saul Goodman square, the bleached fly, periodic table backing, etc.
And should they ever come across this: thank you for putting up with me, Sami 🤗 please don’t tell anyone about this account ough dear god I’ll die of shame
A few people have caught onto the fact that these are all Stephen King characters. I should preface by saying I have only read Misery, Pet Sematary, Cujo, Christine, The Shining, Carrie, Under the Dome, Sleeping Beauties, and Insomnia, so my repertoire was limited to characters in those books.
Hank: Jack Torrance from The Shining
Reasoning: …ok look it’s just because they’re both alcoholics (Jack more-so in the book) BUT Jack is really recognizable. I almost went with Louis Creed from Pet Sematary but that felt too mean and frankly unguessable off of looks alone.
Sumo: Cujo from Cujo
Reasoning: Stephen King didn’t make any other Saint Bernard characters.
I haven’t seen the movie but this pic looks insane 😭 poor Cujo
And for arguably the hardest out of the three:
Connor: Church from Pet Sematary
Reasoning: They both (depending on your playthrough or headcanons) are brought back from the dead, but they come back a bit different than before. Church also gets neutered and Louis starts thinking how Church isn’t a man anymore, he’s an it now, and so on lmao. And they both (again, depends) are hit by trucks. Also this quote:
Church was a big stretch, I admit. Danny from The Shining would’ve been fun (his psychic visions are comparable to Connor’s reconstructions and preconstructions; they both have an outside presence in their head through Tony or Amanda).
My personal top choice would’ve been Paul Sheldon from Misery (held captive by an obsessive woman; pressured to complete his work under duress) cuz that is my favorite SK book, but I was not about to draw crippled legs 💀
And if you made it to the end of my ramblings, here is a gold star for you ⭐️ and if you have any good book recs (can be SK or someone else) please let me know so I do not end up reading another Insomnia 😃
I like to imagine Amanda and President Snow (Hunger Games) obsessing over roses and discussing how to “correct” their respective rebelling youth together.
I think Haymitch and Hank would get along too… at opposite ends of a bar.
Watched Goldeneye with my roommate and Pierce Brosnan’s hair kept falling into his face like Connor’s. And he crashed through windows. And he takes orders from an older lady. And he’s all around badass.
But this title was funnier for Connor, because he indeed probably will.
Side-by-side with the inspo under the break:
I had put Amanda where Halle Berry’s character was at first, but whenever Bond encounters a woman… it usually leads to getting in bed with them 😬 I didn’t want to imply anything LOL
Anyways, I’m sure some naysayers (probably Reed) would nominate a different James Bond character ‘look-alike’ for Connor:
Snooper the dog-like surveillance robot :] he looks so dopey it’s kinda perfect
I know the song is called Father Figure, but the bridge makes me imagine Amanda’s perspective on her relationship with a deviating Connor as the game progresses:
♪ I saw a change in you
My dear boy
They don’t make loyalty like they used to
Your thoughtless ambition sparked the ignition
On foolish decisions, which led to misguided visions
That to fulfill your dreams
You had to get rid of me ♪
A neat summation of a Deviant Connor play-through through Amanda’s eyes imo. Though I severely doubt that was Taylor Swift’s intention lmao.
