goober @bwaintwauma - Tumblr Blog

“I wish that everyone in the world would love me, love me, and love me some more...”

u know if theres one thing i was bracing myself for before s5 it was the influx of like, spn fans who would immediately zero in on whatever form of d/estiel this next season would serve and flood the tags with just that, but i kind of overestimated the boys' writers room GFHIFGH .

i genuinely thought that the spn guys would get to be actual characters. like i theorized that misha collins would maybe play some CIA agent investigating vought or whatever, constantly running into soldier boy etc etc... but no, both jared and misha were just cameos which id argue could still launch a thousand fics except that they made misha collins' character really . Unsexy FGHIFGH i cannot imagine anyone wanting to devote much time to a guy whose superpowers involve belching into ppls faces . i think him getting a gross power rly killed the 'd/estiel in the boys' dream

#and thank god for it

22psyduck

i wanted to discuss homelander having BPD from a perspective of him being given female-coded character arcs: BPD is diagnosed much more in females, and a large part of this is straight up misogyny. i think it levels out that females have 75-80% of BPD diagnoses.

now, even in media, the portrayal of men with BPD is lacking, and it's because the symptoms are seen as 'feminine'; weak and needy. it is medical bias, and in the same vein why you never see portrayals of women with NPD. they are basically seen as female and male mental illnesses, when in reality it'd be a 50/50 split.

a mere few BPD examples:

fear of abandonment: seen as reliant on someone else; lacking the masculine edge of being independent or being the one to have those who rely on him; not the other way around!

splitting: the black and white thinking is often attributed to female hysteria. females can't make decisions or decide on emotions by themselves. "oh she's hot then she's cold! she doesn't know what she wants haha!" apparently, men are far more likely to have an solid opinion and stick to it.

emotional instability: i mean, this one speaks for itself. women are labelled as hysteric, dramatic, and outwardly emotional for attention. whereas if men have issues, they are cold, avoidant and logical about it! they don't act out of emotion! they don't cry!

so yes, of course homelander displaying obvious symptoms of BPD gets him degraded and mocked, even by the people who created him. even if the word BPD was never uttered, it's symptoms are accredited to being female in nature. and we know that kripke already runs homelander through a female-lens, for whatever reason.

ironically, this makes him one of the best male portrayals, and actually just in general portrayals of BPD in TV, because there are no successful gender stereotypes behind it at all. it is just homelander, traumatised from what happened to him. and he is displaying that so openly. he is needy, emotionally unstable, he is impulsive, he splits, he cries! we see how much he struggles with abandonment and controlling his emotions.

of course when i saw him, i related to him so strongly and loved him.

bwaintwauma

Also! A big complaint people had about season 4 was Homelander's parenting style. I think a lot of people took issue with how inconsistent he was, but if you're choosing to interpret him as borderline, it makes a lot more sense. One minute he's telling Ryan that the only thing that matters is what he wants, but in the next he's back to being overly controlling and possessive. That type of back and forth is so common with borderline parents. He really does believe what he's doing is best for Ryan, but what he thinks is best for Ryan varies from moment to moment because his feelings are ever changing. He's afraid to lose him, so he tries to pull him in closer, but those attempts almost always end up pushing him away. We see Homelander freak out a couple times in season 4, one of the most notable being in the finale, when he finds the photo of Butcher and Becca in Ryan's backpack. And when Ryan comes home, he seems largely unfazed by his father's tantrum, which is something I assume we're supposed to think happens often if his reaction is that casual.

#my mom has bpd so i also have some first-hand experience #i love her dearly and she's the reason why homelander will always be a bpd baddie to me #like that's mother #i just really resonated with ryan in season 4 #because it is hard when you have a parent who is incapable of having a healthy relationship with you #because they will not get help for their illness #so they kind of treat you terribly all the time #but you still feel for them and want to be with them because you know why they are the way they are #having a traumatized parent really makes you want to stay in their life because the last thing you want is to be another person who leaves #when butcher asked ryan to stay with him and grace #and ryan said things weren't so bad at the tower #even tho they low-key were #but like that's his daddy and he loves him and wants to be there for him because he's sick 😭#anyways im also a homelander bpd truther #homelander

ficyorick

HL in the vought lab-core

#homelander

popickkk

J.G.

#homelander

spoopieere

“ Codependency “

There is something about Butcher & John being the same characters, and (to me) comparable to a once lived-in house.

So old and so worn, once lived in and taken care of despite the violence that happened inside it. Violence inflicted upon its walls and features by the people who built them. Now they both have no inhabitants, and yet they still dream.

Please please play “Anatomy” by KittenHorrorshow

l haven't posted anything here for a long time

#homelander

22psyduck

Brute - Emily Skaja // No Children - The Mountain Goats // Our Bodies & Other Fine Machines - Natalie Wee // Bloodsport - Yves Olade

#butchlander

Thank you for tagging me @hoodlander !

Three characters I identify with:

1. Ryan (The Boys)

2. Harry Osborn (The Amazing Spider-Man)

3. Yuki Nagato (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya)

No pressure tagging! (sorry if you've already been tagged): @freaked-n-geeked @emolander @deeplanderswife @hvmestarr @moopiter

#tag game

scorchedearf

When Billy steps into the Oval Office, Homelander makes that expression. We know the one. The one that screams “you came back for me” or something. It’s an expression that belongs on the face of a yearning maiden. My butchlander-addled brain can’t help but interpret it any other way but there has to be a canon reason why he has that expression on. I checked the finale script for notes and didn’t find anything. It even adds to the delusion because it says that Homelander “..instantly forgets the camera.” What were the notes? What was Ant thinking while shooting? Why did they choose that shot? If there is no other explantion, I’m sticking to the butchlander interpretation thank you.

bisexualhomelander

I think it's 100% fair that even outside of a Butchlander interpretation, it's an expression of relief.

He just lost his son. He realized that nobody will love him, ever. The world has been lost to him. In the moment he loses it on-camera, he knows this is the end. The world will hate him until the day he dies. He is forced to be a loathsome monster now. Ryan won't ever speak to him again. Neither will Soldier Boy, should he ever wake from his pod.

So here's Butcher. The one man who never broke a promise to him. The man who came for him. The man who is thinking of him all the time. The man who has dedicated his life to him in a way that nobody ever could. The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.

Butcher has not been indifferent a single day.

Scorched earth is STILL ON. And while Homelander is deluding himself into ignoring what scorched earth even really means (that only one of them will be leaving the White House), he knows one thing: it's the most intimate thing he has to look forward to now.

#butchlander