I'm hooked on all these feelings

I over communicate and feel too much. I just complicate it when I say too much. I laugh about it, dream about that casual touch. Sex, fire, sick and tired of acting all tough

[plantfunerals]

but do aliens believe in me….

[villlaneve]

[petrovna]

credit to wavvhaught on twitter

[bxwareofyou]

ultranxmb‌: 

“I can assure you I did not grow up Mormon. But I did have over protective parents who wanted to shield me from a plethora of dangers. I am going to need at least a few years to catch up on all the things I missed growing up. Is this you asking me out? Because I am more than okay if our first date would essentially be Netflix & Chill. I mean, plus or minus the “chill” bit depending on where the night goes. But I promise I will try my best to at least act interested during the movie. I just might have to apologise in advance if I end up being scared and I literally end up straddling you.”

“A plethora of fictional dangers...?” He laughed.” Yeah... Yeah I guess I am asking you out. I mean I was hinting at it before but I guess I should try to make my intentions clearer and not speak in riddles so much... I’ll work on that. Wait... so be extra clear, that’s you saying yes, right? For transparency’s sake I need to ask because I’m not a cheap date or anything and I could take you out to eat or something fancy but I... I guess I’d like to get to know you better and it’s kind hard to do that in a restaurant full of people... And besides if the date goes the way I hope it does in my head you might end up straddling me anyway....”

[bxwareofyou]

ultranxmb‌: 

Humming to himself, Cooper listened to the other man with bated breath–even though Sydney was second-guessing his choice for a career from the moment he stepped into his house. Still, the younger man remained confident in his abilities–not only as a writer but as a person. His efforts may take a while, but the struggling author would not be giving up until he could wear the man down or at least get him to crack one smile. “I will have you know my writing skills were not the problem.” He replied and chuckled as he did so, before parting his lips again to speak. “My story was the problem. Apparently, no one was behind the idea of putting fairy tales in a modern world.” Cooper huffed back until a wide grin hooked along his features as the sound of the man finally accepting his presence came to ear. “I guess I should be lucky I don’t have asthma. I really wouldn’t want to annoy you just because I can not breathe and could possibly drop dead at any second.” The man teased before clapping his hands together and extending his hand outward to offer a handshake. “I haven’t been under strict rules since the time I was dating—never-mind. But–yes! Deal. I’m holding my hand out for a shake, by the way.”

There was agitation and it was obvious, but Syd was growing weary of arguing. He supposed one day wouldn’t kill him, and if it was really as bad as he assumed it would be, he would offer an ultimatum to his editor.  “ You write children’s books?”” He scoffed, knowing that children’s book these days weren’t the works of Lewis Carroll and at best were thirty pages of one sentence rhymes. That thought made him shudder.  It was either that or the man trying to crack a joke. “ Hilarious.“ He grumbled before reluctantly extending his hand. “ My office is this way. I start work early. Everything is on the ground floor so there’s no need to go upstairs.” He ordered as he moved towards said office. “ My keyboard is in braille but I usually use a vocalized program to read it back to be to check for grammatical errors. I guess that means you’re a human spell-checker now. “ He smirked. “ But I’ll still use the software to make sure you aren’t writing anything you shouldn’t. Think you can handle that? Or do I need to write it out so you remember?” 

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

Sophia couldn’t hold back the shock on her face even if she tried. Her jaw dropped open and her eyes widened, at Anya’s retort. The woman always seemed so self-sufficient and fierce, Sophia had a hard time believing they had much in common in their youth. “Really?” Sophia muttered, realizing she didn’t know much about Anya either. “Wow…I just would’ve never…” She shook her head a little, still at a momentary loss for words. While it was humanizing to hear from Anya, it also brought along comfort for Sophia that she isn’t alone in what she’s feeling or going through. “This would be the time I would hug you but I know you don’t like human contact, so I suppose a thank you would suffice. I really needed to hear that.” She grinned. “Between you and I, I don’t need nine months, I’m already ready to do whatever it takes to protect my baby.” Sophia grinned quiet proudly, before her smile turned upside down at the pickle jar placed in front of her. Regretting her previous statement immediately, she grabbed the jar and took a sip, stomach lurching the second the taste hit her tongue. “Oh my god! That is absolutely disgusting! How do you drink this stuff?! No thank you, I’m good, I’ll stick to kombucha and sign my kid up for karate classes.”

There was a twitch her eye made at the word hug, but Anya meant it when she said she was trying to be more gentle with affection. Hesitating, she swallowed thickly before warning Sophia, “ Do not get used to this.” Before extending her arms. It only lasted a few seconds, but it was enough. “Trust me, you will need the nine months.” She chuckled, her own time almost up and as excited as she was, Anya knew there were going to be many sleepless nights ahead. Scoffing, Anya was offend but that reaction, but managed to chuckle as she snatched back her jar. “ Fine, have a wimpy soft child! You will regret it when he grows up to look liek Steve Rogers before that potion they gave him.” She laughed as she stood. “ You’re lucky we have some herbal tea.Top shelf. Go put on the kettle while I pee, then I can prepare you for your first trimester.” Anya smiled, moving toward the bathroom before settling in for some girl time. It was different, but it was her life from now on, and Anya could see herself getting used to it.

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

“We’re not really a family known for speaking about or feeling our emotions.” Valerie retorted, voice still a little cold and distant. It was a trait everyone in the family possessed. They didn’t deal with their feelings, they buried it, threw money at it and pretended it didn’t exist entirely. “I don’t know what I feel and maybe that’s the problem. Why should I cry if I don’t feel sad about killing him? What the hell is being angry going to do?  I’m not allowed to feel guilty and being scared feels pointless when I’m standing here with you.” Shrugging her shoulders, it’s hard to articulate that isn’t trying to be cold but she’s simply being logical about the situation. Another negative trait passed onto her. 

When he takes a step closer, Valerie reached down to grab one of his hands. “I love you, Brody. That much I do know. I think that’s the only piece out of this fucked up situation I can wrap my head, understand and grasp onto.” It probably wasn’t the response or reaction he’d been hoping for, but it was all she had to offer, Stepping away, she moved to the nightstand and grabbed his box of his cigarettes, lighting one up. “Since the day we met, we’ve been dealing with my family and then Vivienne. While I figure my shit out, I think we need to figure out and enjoy an us without all the bullshit.”

With her hand in his, Brody lifted her palm to his lips and pressed firmly, breathing in deeply before he looked at her again. “And I get that. My family wasn’t into feelings neither, and it wasn’t like you could be emotional in prison.” He tried to joke a little. “ But feelings... It’s what makes us human. It’s what makes us able to make the right decisions and comeback from things like this instead of staying in a shell forever.” He sighed as she moved away, eyes following her around the room and staying out of her way.

“That’s why we’re here, baby. To heal. To lay low and  figure it out. Together.” Slowly, he moved to the bed and perched on the edge, patting the side for her to join. “ Cause we’re together, Val. I mean it when I said I would never let anyone hurt you but the one person who still can and get away with it is you. You wanna yell at me,do it.You wanna cry in my arms, do it. You don’t need to cry over him but ... Whatever it is, I just don’t want you to shut down on me.

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

Wrapped up in her conversation with Zoe, it didn’t take long for Candy to forget Bennett wasn’t by her side. She didn’t think much of his disappearance, knowing this was a work related event and figuring he’d rather leave her to chat it up with a friend instead of boring her with work related talk. If she took a closer look, she would’ve noticed far more familiar faces were in the room but the two were deeply engrossed in conversation about the latest runway shows which spiraled into their upcoming trip to Paris and all that needed to be done. By the time her other half returned, she was already polishing off her second drink and about to go on a tangent about how gaudy the latest Gucci collection was. 

“I’d answer that question but something tells me you don’t want to hear about floral patterns.” Candy jokingly responded with a laugh, setting the empty glass down on a tray that passed by them. “It’s going great. Everything good with you? You were gone for awhile.” She noted, mostly asking out of concern then to be nosey. “Have you had a drink? We should get you a drink, you need to loosen up, Bub.”

With a smile, he tried to his his nerves, wanting to remain calm even at the fear that his daughters would get impatient and run out to find Candy, thus ruining the surprise. His lips pressed to the side of her head, which he could reach without bending in half due to her heels, his arm pulling her close to his body as he gave Zoe a gentle nod that had her backing away. “Candace....” He breathed out. He agreed with her idea, taking a drink off a passing try and handing it to her before grabbing one for himself. While the cocktails that were on the tray and changed to champagne and was no circling around the room, Bennett turned the redhead to face him as he looked into her eyes. 

“Sweetheart, I’m sorry if I seem a little on edge tonight, but you know how I can get when I want things to go well. You know better than anyone how fixated I get on work and on perfection and how much time away from you and the girls it takes and you still stand here by my side through all of it. You’re so strong and so beautiful and so kind and patient and loving... I feel like I have been waiting my whole life for you to come along and now that I have you, I can’t recall what I did to deserve you.” There was a faint rumbling sound behind them, but Bennett an tightened his grip on Candy so she couldn’t turn around to see the cake being wheeled in, even if she noticed that the crowd around them hand dissipated to a circle, the music silenced and that Zoe had walked her covertly to the middle of the room.  “ In all the times that we talked about forever I... I’m not good at this...with words... I ... Candace you are a dream come true for us and I want the start of forever to be now, because you shouldn’t have to wait any longer. And while I know.. I know you’ve already accepted us, if you could just say yes one more time...”  That was when they were joined by the girls, who had ran over to latch themselves around Candy’s legs as Ben let her go so she could tend to them, bending in the process as the dogs pulled their way over, reuniting the entire family. “ Forbes has already called me the man who has everything, but my life is only complete with you. Will you marry me?”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

Hearing Anya talk, all Sophia could do is run her fingers through hair and let out an exasperated sigh. “Ugh, why are the Shannon men so complicated?” She groaned, her worries a valid mix of her complicated past with Stace and her previous relationships. Admittedly, things were much better with Stace than before but a part of her still was waiting for the shoe to drop and everything to go to shit. “Easy for you to say, you’re Miss. Independent.” Sophia smirked, as she continued. “I already love the baby so much and it’s not even here yet. I wanted this for so long and with my luck, guess I’m just trying not set myself up for disappointed.” Although she was far from showing, a hand still casually rested on her stomach. “…but you’re right, this isn’t about him. I mean…he is the father and everything, but I need to focus on my baby. Worrying about everything little thing isn’t good for both of us. Think I need to learn how to kick back and enjoy the pickle juice like you do.” She chuckled softly.

Sophia seemed to be in the same boat as Anya was, which made offering her advice easier. Still, in spite of her hatred of opening up, Anya knew that it was something she had to work on, especially being a mother. But not only would it help her grow, but would help Sophia. “ If...” She chuckled, still not believing she was saying this. “ If I was really that independent, do you think I would have spent the last thirteen years or my life following a band around? I graduated from MIT and could have been a brilliant scientist. But... I couldn’t picture a life without Tucker in it in some capacity. Believe it or not, Tucker plays a great part in helping me be me. You’d be shocked, but I was just like you when I was younger.” Anya smiled. Nodding, she was happy that Sophia seemed to understand and agree with her, taking a deep breath and grinning. “ Yes, I am right. Trust me, you will still love Stace, but over the next nine months you will bond with this being growing inside you so much that you will throw Stace in front of a bullet to protect it. “ Anya chuckled. “But I am happy for you, Sophia.” Anya added with a genuine smile. It was short lived as she turned away to take the jar and slide it to Sophia. “ Drink up, Moushka, it’s full of electrolytes and I wont have my sons cousin so fragile that he can’t play outside or take a shove.”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

“Anyone ever tell you not to judge a book by its cover?” Sophia retorted, surprised at how easily she let on that she wasn’t really okay despite what the outside may show. More often than not she tried her best to cover up any worries, fears or doubts with a happy smile, a pink dress and some form of a baked good. While she is far from okay, she wasn’t going to pretend to be anything but if it meant her older brother could leave town and catch what’ll hopefully be his big break. “It’s not easy but it’s why I don’t think you should be alone right now.” She commented, listening intently to what the other girl was going through. “I know it seems like it, but it’s not the end of the world. We’ll figure something out, okay? You’re not alone.” Sophia reassured, pausing for a moment to think about a temporary solution. “Well….maybe you don’t have to say anything just yet? Maybe there’s a way you can get back into school? And…well, if you’re looking for a place to stay…maybe I could help with that as well?”

An orange brow cocked at the woman quoted every grandmother ever, even Vikki was smart enough to get the meaning. Still, in spite all her defensiveness, there was something warm and gentle about the blonde and the feeling that came with her saying ‘ you’re not alone’ when Vikki had always felt different. “ It does... Feel like that...” Vikki choked out. Sighing, she was trying to wrap her head around her thoughts when the blonde’s next sentence made her brow perk up again. “ What do you mean? You know a place where they give food and jobs to broke dropouts who can’t keep it in their damn pants? I may be at rock ass bottom but I aint goin’ in no shelter. And I maybe already slept with a professor or two.... ”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

When he repeated the words our baby, Sophia could fill heart fill with joy as everything could’ve wanted was officially achieved. She was happy, madly in love and pregnant—-it was everything she dreamed of and more. A hand raised to cup Stace’s cheek lovingly, a thumb wiping away the tears that stained them. “You’re the love of my life, my soulmate. Our baby is a product of that. I’m so happy to be having your baby, I can’t wait for the three of us to be a family.” Her lips press against Stace’s briefly, leaning forward to rest her forehead against his. 

With a deep breath, Stace closed his eyes and let himself still for a moment. It was stupid and he didn’t want to say it out loud, but he wanted to feel her stomach on his own, as if he could feel the baby. “ A family... My family... We are.. We will be... “ Stace stammered out teary eyed. It took a few moments for him to collect himself, listening to the sound of their breathing as he soaked it all in, then he finally sprouted up. “Okay! First things first, you need vitamins. Lots of vitamins and you need rest and foods with good stuff in them like avocados an tomatoes. And we need to take you to see a doctor and then we need a house... A big house...” He went off as the list formed in his mind, having done some of these things before and wanting to make sure this time that he got it all right. “ I’m gonna call a real estate agent and I think I -- Oh! Anya has a doctor! we can use her and we need... well, you need food.... We have so much to do..”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

The look Anya was not helping Sophia’s nerves at all. Not even the chuckle that sounded at Anya’s (accurate) assessment of Stace could sound genuine. “I don’t think he’s going to leave me, it’s just…” Sophia abruptly paused, brows furrowing together because she was no longer able to tip toe around the subject for much longer. “I’m pregnant.” She said with a sigh, pretty sure Anya already knew anyway. “That’s what I’m worried about jinxing. Before the French skank came into our lives we’d been trying..then that happened and before Stace I was…and I lost it…” She began to explain, trailing off for a moment. “I’ve wanted to a baby for so long, I’m just afraid to get too happy and it’ll get ruined.”

Two-toned eyes still narrowed at the blonde, when she finally admits that Anya was right, the Russian makes no attempt at hiding her pride. “ I knew it! I knew it. No one can keep secrets from a Russian.” She joked, laughing as she grabbed the pickle jar to take a sip. Jokes aside, Sophia seemed more stress than happy about it. The reason why was quickly revealed, Anya setting down the jar and grunting in disgust. “ Ugh, I never liked that bitch. You can’t trust the French.” She grumbled. Trying to soften her tone, Anya looked at Sophia dead on. “ Look, I am no good with this mushy feelings crap. this we all know, so I will give it to you straight. “ He was never hers. Stace, I mean. He was always yours. You worked hard for him, you stayed by his side and trust me, I know how hard that is with these men.  I also know how hard it is tolet yourself be happy after being burned. Believe me, I thought it was my time so many times only for Tucker to get back together with tattoo-face for the tenth time. I thought it was never going to happen and when it did, i didn’t want to let myself believe it either. It’s hard giving your all to a man in general, but when that man seems.... Well you get the picture.  But this, now? This is your time. Not time for him , but time for your child. No matter what happens you have to find new ways to be happy and as hard s it is, Stace has to take the back seat in your heart and in your life so that your baby can be healthy. Stace isn’t the one who will be carrying this life. You have no right to be sad or stressed when something so beautiful -- and painful -- is happening in you. It is now your turn to make him work for it and stick by your side as you put someone else first. Someone else being yourself and your child. The only way you can jinx is is by still letting Stace run your life and not thinking of yourself and what makes you happy.”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

The path to get to this moment was filled with more lows than highs. She could vividly remember the late night Sophia asked him to have a baby. Those dreams dashed away as quickly as they started. Now, they were finally here and nothing or no one could get in their way. “Yes, you’re going to be a dad.” Sophia said again with a nod of her head, still unsure of his reaction. They hadn’t talked much about a baby since they got together but Sophia always figured getting to this point was inevitable, they were never too fond of protection. Before she could seep into a moment of panic, Stace’s joke caused a breathless laugh to sound from her. Playfully pushing him, Sophia then flung herself around him. “Of course it’s yours.” She confidently stated, nuzzling into his neck as she held onto him tightly. “And he’s gonna have your eyes and nose and my smile….” She began to ramble, happiness emanating from her. “He’s gonna be ours, we’re having a baby.”

More and more the feeling sank in that this was real, this was happening and Stace began to feel his hands shaking. It was a different feeling because unlike before, he loved the woman having his child. There was a crazy wave of emotions washing over him that were dashed away when Sophia toppled on him, releasing a laugh he was holding in. The chortle turned to hysterical laughter from the joy that took him, his arms locking around Sophia as he looking up at her in awe. “ Our baby...” He said simply. “ It’s really happening...” He chuckled dryly, only noticing that he was crying when he felt something wet on his face and noticing that it hadn’t been dripping onto him from her eyes. “ You’re... You’re my everything. You’re just so... For giving me this... for everything...”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

It seemed like every major phase of Kenzie’s life and her relationship began with a huge, truth filled speech from Gia. Typically, Kenzie is the first to roll her eyes and brush off the grand lectures but, in her moments of need, her longtime friend had always been the support she needed. Never one to speak her mind, Gia was more often the voice and courage Kenzie often didn’t possess herself. Evan may’ve been the love of her life but Gia was in a close second as the person she cared most about that wasn’t directly blood related. Unable to find the correct words to articulate what she wanted to say, she ended up pulling the brunette into a tight hug, tears beginning to form in her eyes. “What would I do without you?” She choked out, squeezing Giada tightly. “You know I’d float away without you, too?” Pulling away, they may’ve been on the subject of Evan but she felt the need to express how much the other meant to her. “Both of you guys…I’m not—-made for this like you two are but you never turned your back on me and have been there for me through everything. I wouldn’t be where I am without him…or you, I wouldn’t have made it.” Sniffling, she wiped her tear stained cheeks with the sleeve of her jacket before grabbing Gia’s hand, giving them a squeeze. “Thank you.” Kenzie continued, voice still soft as she spoke. “For never giving up on me…on us, for knowing when to kick us in the ass but, also, when to step back and let us figure it out. I owe just as much of my happiness to you as I do him…” With a simple shake of her head, Kenzie knew she skewed the conversation entirely. “Sorry…it’s just….you’re right…you’re always right…God, I hate it when you’re right.” She laughed wiping at her face again with her free hand as she nodded her head. “I’ll talk to him….we’ll figure it out, it takes us awhile but we always do. That’s just how we work, we can’t ever do anything the easy way.” Cracking a joke, she flashed Gia a smile grin.

There was a chuckle and an ‘oof’ when Kenzie pulled Gia into a hug, her arms wrapping around the blonde awkwardly in the truck as she patted her back. It was normal for Gia to cry at everything at the drop of a hat, her natural instincts to be dramatic no matter what,but the tears that fell were always genuine, and they were this time , too. “ Oh honey... You’d both be living nightmares without me.” She joked in response before settling back in her seat and patting her eyes dry to avoid ruining her makeup. “ Oh Kenz... You were made for this life, you just weren’t made for the bullshit that comes with it. That’s why your the best of us.” Gia chuckle, reaching out to cup the blonde’s face with a smile. “Honey, what are best friends for?” She smiled sweetly, pinching Kenzie’s cheek before letting her hands fallback into her lap. “ The sooner you accept that I’m always right, the happier you’ll be, trust me.” Gia cackled her trademark loud laugh before pulling out her phone. “Oh honey, you wasted enough time as is. Turn this car around and take my ass home and go get your man! But seriously, take me home first because I am not standing in this hot sun while I wait for an Uber.”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

The change in his tone caused Valerie to stiffen, a bit shocked by how quickly he pulled away and even more so with the rant that followed. Brody was never the type of guy to tip to toe around the subject, his bluntness and need to be straightforward always being a quality she admired, but it was the first time it was aimed at her. For a second there’s a pause, Valerie letting his words sink in as she tried to process all of what he said and try to formulate a response. Knowing them, it could go one of two ways and she was trying to avoid a fight because she knew Brody was only looking out for her best interest. 

“What do you want me to say, Brody? Huh?” Valerie asked, leaning against the doorframe to the bathroom. Arms folded across her chest as she looks at him from the across the room. “That I shot a man in the back and I’m not upset about it because that means you’re here with me? That I’m more upset and confused at how easy it was for me to pull the trigger?” Fingers run through her long blond hair, shaking her head a little bit as she continued. “I don’t care about killing him, I meant it when I said I’d do it all again. I just…I don’t know who the person is I’m staring at in the mirror and that’s…that’s scary. I’m Valerie fucking Hawthorne, that used to mean something to me, and I feel like that person…that girl, it’s all been a lie. I tried…so hard, spent my entire life trying to please my family, live up to this ridiculous expectation that I’d never meet and my own family fucked me over. They left me out to dry and you…you were the only one who had my back..who protected me. You’re right…this isn’t about you, it’s about me knowing that the second I decided to kill him I knew I couldn’t go back to the life…that person I once was and now I’m trying to figure out who I am now.”

He didn’t want to hurt her, but deep down part of Brody knew that there was only one way he would get a reaction. Since the incident , Valerie hadn’t broken down, and Brody knew from experience that it was an important part of healing after a first time like that. That was why he raised his voice. “ Yeah that’s exactly what I want you to fuckin’ say!” echoed in the room, which unlike a hotel, had space to shout without worry. It was one of the many reasons he’d picked the beach side bungalow to hide away in. “ I want you to be scared! I want you to cry and fucking feel something and not be like that bitch who caused all this. What you did isn’t a thing you can just shrug off and be too cool to deal with.  I had nightmares years after my first time and it gets easier every time, that’s what’s scary about it. I never wanted this life for you; runnin’ killing people... Don’t pretend to be so cool about it because that’s what fuckin’ scares me.”

With a sigh, Brody took a deep breath, moving towards her with a softer tone and expression. “Valerie Hawthorne isn’t just some stuck up princess the media can paint her as or some overworking robot her family wants her to be. She’s the product of your actions and she’s whoever the fuck you want her to be. Be somebody or be nobody at all but whatever you choose, don’t choose it for somebody else. Not even me. I’m gonna love you no matter what. I’m always gonna protect you, but baby... You don’t have money and image to hide behind anymore and I’m not gonna become the thing you hide behind to replace that.  You don’t have to figure it out today, tomorrow, or even  year from now but don’t... Don’t shut off your emotions to deal with it because then you wouldn’t just lose yourself, I’d lose you. And if I lose you I got nothin’ left to live for.”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

Sophia was absolutely mortified. When she planned this morning out in her head, she pictured a romantic breakfast that would culminate in a surprise. Not in a chaotic mess that has Stace running expensive cotton sheets with coffee and them both blurting out apologies profusely. “Stacie—baby—no, you don’t need to.” Sophia began to explain, suddenly feeling awful for making Stace feel so bad in her attempt to make a moment special. When he balled up the napkin, she almost lost it, about to reach out and stop him when he paused himself. Hand stretched out, Sophia was frozen in place, watching his every movement as he slowly opened his palm to reveal the ultrasound. A wave of relief came over Sophia, letting out a deep breath she didn’t know she’d been holding in. Carefully, moving over to Stace despite all the mess. “I’m pregnant.” She stated for him, eyes shifting from the paper in his hand to his face, gauging his reaction. “That’s our baby…we’re having a baby.” The smile on her face was wide, cheeks already hurting from grinning so big. “I’m sorry for being so weird I just…wanted it to be perfect and I wanted to be sure but it happened…you’re gonna be a dad.”

The paper, which turned out to be a picture, was blurry black and white, and would have gone over his head in most cases, but he knew what it was.”Sophia...” He echoed. There was a moment where his mind went blank. He’d gone through this before; he could remember feeling happy, excitement, but then nervous and scared. The first time he was excited to get to try to be a good father, but scared when he had to tell Sophia. Though things were different not, the feelings were the same, but for different reasons.”I’m ...going to be a dad....?” He repeated, still grasping the situation as his finger traced the tiny little peanut in the photo. After initial panic from the roller coaster of emotions, Stace felt the joy kick in enough to make a joke. “ it... I mean,it’s mine, right?” He breathed out, trying to keep his face flat.

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

Jokingly, Sophia’s hands go up in defense as if to show she meant no harm with the comment. “I think it’s sweet you want to stay true to your heritage.” Sophia responded, hoping to make up for her initial reaction. “It’s important, Tucker is a great name.” She grinned, knowing that now she was laying it on way too thick. The smile was short lived, face dropping as Anya turned the subject around her and began to pick up on the littlest of things. “Wow, Anya, you sound like my mother.” Sophia joked, nervously playing with the pendant to her necklace as she chewed on her lower lip. Never a good lie, she also knew she didn’t have the finesses to successfully bullshit Anya…but she sure as hell was going to try. “Of course I have but I’m trying not to get too ahead of myself. I know what’s it like to to get myself worked up and think of this entire future, only to have it blow up in your face and be left with nothing.”

[bxwareofyou]

lostangxls‌: 

It was a valid question. If the tables were turned, she’s sure Sophia would be asking the same thing if a person she didn’t know was offering to help her her. Sophia couldn’t tell you why but she felt a connection to the redhead and wasn’t able to turn her back. Most importantly, it looked like she needed someone who would listen and be there for her. “I don’t know…guess I just wished someone was there for me when I went through a tough time.” Sophia responded softly, relating more than the other girl could possibly understand. Her older brother may’ve stepped up after Sophia appeared on his doorstep late one night a wreck but before that, she had no one. “You don’t have to accept my help. I get it, you don’t even know me. But if you wanna like…talk or something, I’m more than happy just to be an ear for you to vent to or whatever.”

Selfishness was deeply rooted in Vikki’s DNA, but there was a look on the blonde’s face that  said something to her -- like she really did understand. Sighing heavily, dramatically, Vikki slumped her shoulder. “But nobody was, huh?” She assumed.  “ Well you look like you came outta it -- if you feel like sharin’ your secret, please do, cause I need all the help I can get, I’m thinkin’.” She did’t want to talk -- well, she did, but it was habit to keep to herself. Still, the words came out before she knew they would, as though she couldn’t keep anything else in. “ I don’t fuckin’ know what I’m gon’ do. I flunked, I screwed around and screwed up, now I got no place to live and I fought this hard already to get my daddy  trust me enough to let me leave home to go to school out here and now when Igo back home and tell him I got kicked out he’s gonna beat my ass stupid then probably kick me out too... I fucked myself...”