wolf in sheep's clothing

Telling all your lies like second nature. Listen, mark my words, one day. You will pay, you will pay. Karma's gonna come collect your debt

[persephone-johanson]

What are they doing?

[byejesse-blog]

Exotic dancing, you know like stripping.

[thoroughly-millie]

Maybe you were in a stranger’s bed and their roommate left you in the hallway.

[byejesse-blog]

Don’t tell me that. I would like to think if someone was manhandling me I would wake up.

[chasing-jimmy]

Nah, I’m the one who takes the pictures.

[byejesse-blog]

Ah, you’re that guy.

[persephone-johanson]

*Staring at a Magic Mike Poster*  I don’t get it.

[byejesse-blog]

--What don’t you get about it?

[chasing-jimmy]

My friends like to make themselves lose it. I like to be the one to remember to tell them.

[byejesse-blog]

Nah you see my motto is, “if you can’t remember then it must have been a pretty damn good night.”

[ryder-willis-blog]

Now for the most important question; did someone steal your pants? I hear that’s an ongoing joke if you’re drunk at parties or in public.

[byejesse-blog]

Not this time! I spilled beer on my jeans and decided to take them off.

[chasing-jimmy]

We all do. Though most of them are about us trying to hook up with girls way out of our leaugue.

[byejesse-blog]

You guys gotta be more adventurous. I remember once with some friends we ended up in Boston - I don;t know how we got there but we did- and I remember waking up with hickes and an embarrassing tattoo. 

[ryder-willis-blog]

Nope, the entire night before was just gone for me. Did you at least know the person whose couch it was?

[byejesse-blog]

I didn’t - no. I just remember be woken up by a screaming father who came home early.

[chasing-jimmy]

Nah, not me. But some guy I knew. He was also crazy high.

[byejesse-blog]

Sounds like my kind of guy. I must meet him. I bet he has some awesome stories.

[ryder-willis-blog]

I once woke up with the hangover of a lifetime, sitting upside down in my bathtub, once, if that counts.

[byejesse-blog]

Nah- gotta happen at least twice for it to count or else. 

I’m kidding, obviously but do you even remember why you were upside down? The worst I had was when I woke up underneath someone’s couch.

[chasing-jimmy]

Well… Better than waking up in an ice bath missing a kidney.

[byejesse-blog]

Did that happen to you? Oh my god, I am so sorry.   On the plus side - kidneys are worth quite a lot on the black market.

[byejesse-blog]

So, remind me to never drunk again. It almost feels like I’m in some sort of Katy Perry song, the only difference being, I unfortunately didn’t wake up with a stranger in my bed, just in the hallway in my underwear.

[drivearoundtunes]

Visit Original Link

habits (stay high) // tove lo

I’ll make it fast and greasy I’m numb and way too easy

[missvoltairine-blog]

do you ever just get a vibe that someone has a crush on you and then you’re not sure if they actually do or if you’re just really really self-absorbed

[cross--marian]

everywhere is a bed if you try hard enough