Words make me feel better.
My hope is,
If I write about it,
Again and again,
Then maybe they will be true.
That’s the point of manifestation right?
If I write that I am strong,
If I write that I can do hard things,
If I write that I will make it through this,
And achieve all my dreams,
Then they will come true.
But words can cloud my judgment too.
Because,
To be honest,
There are too many words.
In the English language,
There are about,
171,476 words.
So many words,
To say the same things.
To express the same emotions.
I think my love for words
Arise from the constant need to explain myself.
If I can use a combination,
Of the 171,476 words in the English language,
To explain what I mean,
To explain what I feel,
Then maybe I will solve the problem.
If I can just explain,
Please!
Let me please explain.
If I explain to you,
If I explain to me,
That this stems from this,
And that stems from that,
Then maybe you will understand,
Then maybe my mind will understand.
And if I understand,
Then I won’t feel this way right? The weight will be lifted off of me,
and I will feel light,
and be able to rise up tall
and into the sky,
like a balloon getting freed from its string.
If you understand,
Where I am coming from,
Then maybe you will see,
That I just want to be loved.
Maybe you will look at me,
And caress my face,
And tell me it’s alright.
Or maybe you will see,
That I actually don’t know what I am talking about.
Because even though there are
171,476 words in the English language,
I still can’t tell you
What it is I feel.
But maybe you will still,
Love me anyways.
