This is just a little red dead snippet I wrote the other day while down in the dumps. I hope to write more, I have a lot of thoughts for a fic but I’ve never really written before so I’m giving it a try! Please be kind!
“I’ve given up. People just let you down.”
Arthur sits in silence contemplating your words as you both sit atop your horses overlooking the wide stretch of plains ahead of you. The grass transitioning from a golden green to a darker more peaceful color.
“I don’t think everyone is bad though”
Arthur remarks thoughtfully.
You shake your head and climb down. It’s about time to settle for the night, there’s a long trip ahead of you both.
“If everyone isn’t bad then what do you call it when everyone is out for themself?”
“Well look at the gang. We do for each other. Everybody pitches in. We’re a family.”
“But would the gang still be a family if one person in it had money? Or if somebody fucked up really bad?”
“I guess it wouldn’t be the same as it is now. But I’d like to think there’s more holding us together than needing money.”
Arthur has a good heart. You wish you could still see things the way he does. It’s amazing with all he’s been through that he can still see good in the world. But what hardened Arthur into a better man only made you a shell of who you once were. Where Arthur sees ghosts you only see dirt and skeletons. There’s nothing left for you.
“Do you think you’ll ever love again Arthur?”
He looks at you for a moment. And you can see deep thoughts circling in his stormy eyes. Maybe that question was too far. But you don’t care. There isn’t much you care about anymore.
“I reckon I’d like to try. But I don’t see it being like it used to be. Before I got old. Before things got so damn complicated.”
“I think something broke inside me. I’m just here. Ain’t nothing more to it than that I suppose.”
Even as you say it, you know you feel a longing for that connection. It was unbearable to lose the man you loved. To lose everything you’d ever known. But it’s unbearable to think of moving on. So for now you’re just existing.
“It’s gonna be okay eventually.”
You feel Arthur’s hand on your shoulder.
“It has to be. It has to be.”