#thoughts&minds @calypsoscreams - Tumblr Blog

I used to write daily. I used to write on a notebook, keep a journal, to vent. I used this because I am a quiet person, I do not express much, and I don't know how. Thus, the writing.

But I stopped, and I forgot why. I used to write daily, but now it's too pretty rare. I used writing as a medium to control my emotions, especially my anger.

And now, I'm in a deep deep hole and I decided to read some of my thoughts in a certain app I chose over an actual notebook. I wrote those years ago, but it seems as if nothing changed...

I'm still miserable. Great.

you said. if it is meant to be. fate will bring us back together. for a second i wonder if you are really that naive. if you really believe fate works like that. as if it lives in the sky staring down at us. as if it has five fingers and spends its time placing us like pieces of chess. as if it is not the choices we make. who taught you that. tell me. who convinced you. you’ve been given a heart and a mind that isn’t yours to use. that your actions do not define what will become of you. i want to scream and shout it’s us you fool. we’re the only ones that can bring us back together. but instead i sit quietly. smiling softly through quivering lips thinking. isn’t it such a tragic thing. when you can see it so clearly but the other person doesn’t.

rupi kaur

#rupikaur #prose #poem #prosepoem #poetry #literature #art

This isn't some quote.

But it is rather overwhelming and just so familiar and warm to meet someone of the same soul.

You know what I mean.

Regardless the fact that you are strangers to each other. But the short moment you had is something special you want to never forget.

My heart!! aAAAAAAAAAa

#bookworms

Do your studies make you happy?

I love learning. I love to learn. I love it when I discover new things. I love it when I get to realize something that is too obvious but takes time to actually discover. I love feeling of fulfillment everytime my mind is filled big new things. I love learning. But I hate studying!

Almost half of human's life is spent studying. And I am 18 in the present and have been going to school since I was three. Since I was a kid, I like going to school. Mainly because I get to play with the other kids, or maybe because of the foods I could whenever I am outside. But as time passes, for instance in the present, things seemed to shift a bit. The times that I loved going to school turned into "wanted to lock myself in the house and just spend time with myself". Although I have mentioned that I love learning but hate studying, does not meant that I want to stop learning. I turned that like to hate, maybe because it is suffocating. Maybe because I got tired of expectations around me and standards to be met - although I do not have to but felt like I should have to, and all of that made me think that the essence of everything seemed to fade. In spite of achieving average marks, the truth deep inside will not always be keep hidden, and I am worried that it will show and will make me do things I should not. For instance, leave the thing that makes me happy. Stop going to school, and stop studying for I am aware that I would not stop learning.

Of course, I know better, or so I thought. Those trifles will remain as they are and I have to think the other way. That I have to study, get a degree, find a job, survive and maybe be happy. Maybe that is how it should be, maybe that is the only path to be taken these days. If only I could make myself do it, maybe studying will make me happy. And maybe living everyday will be better, and learning even more will be more fulfilling.

#reality #studies #learning #practicality #personal #naivety #love #hate #nonsense

I never expected that it will turn out just like that. I mean, I know it will happen but it shouldn't be that way!!! For freak's sake, I was dumbfounded. I was left with my mouth open wide. And I seemed to lost myself for a bit. Like wHyyyyy?! ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽

#I Want To Eat Your Pancreas