Will just be talking to myself anyway bc I’ve been gone for so long so imma just go ahead and say my inner thoughts:
I’m in complete shock that I have a voiced variety of love interests rn. There’s the “I promise I wanna be in a relationship with you but first let’s just fuck a few more years til you get tired of my shit” LI so I’m too weak to say no to. There’s the “baby you so cute, here lemme spoil you real quick so you don’t leave me” LI who I’m kinda into but not all the way there. There’s the quiet, mysterious, totally out of my league LI who I can’t pinpoint why I’m so attached to him, but it doesn’t stop me from being completely wrapped around his finger. Even knowing that this is the only one that is forbidden, because I’m not allowed to date customers.
And even more than that, it’s the fact that the one I want to explore most is the one I have the least amount of engagement with. And that that is the one that I’m low-key putting myself out there with. And it’s the fact that I’m even putting myself out there at all. Considering that’s not something I do, ever adulting is so weird. I hope one of these days, I actually make all my feelings, actually worth a damn.
And it’s also the fact that my quiet mysterious customer crush is a “I’ll brush off anyone I want to” kinda personality from what I’ve seen. Yet literally with me the actual sweetest person alive? And he got me a gift a week ago bc apparently when I smile at him I brighten his day 🥲 and I completely lost all my shit bc this clearly isn’t my real life. And I couldn’t even accept his gift bc my job is stupid.
And it’s the fact that I created a loop hole and drafted up a gift for him instead. And had my friend give it to him in my absence a couple nights ago. And he beamed receiving something from me. And now me and 5 of my friends (3 of which being my coworkers) are all nervous af awaiting his reaction to the letter I wrote him, and we can’t even get that update until this upcoming Saturday.
Honestly it’s the fact that I finally found someone who I didn’t stop myself from taking a big risk for, and it’s actually been paying off. And everything‘s just been playing out so quickly. Like I literally didn’t even expect any of this. I thought I was getting rejected, but somehow not only is that not the case, but also we just went on our first 2 dates in the last 2 days and everywhere we go People think we’re an actual established couple. And one lady actually love bombed us. I’ve never been so comfortable with any person in my life. It’s insane
