Cyanide and Whoredem

sad sappy fangirl. NSFW. She/her/they/them. I like pretty things. Strictly 18+ Too old for this shit( fml im 30).I can't be arsed to make another acc not since my old was taken. I post everything here, deal with it or piss off. ︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵ Queer af

[intergalacticmca]

I love how greedy and indulgent Ilya is in sex with Shane. He’s so wrapped up in his own pleasure that he can’t even hide how dizzy it makes him. He’s panting, he’s moaning, he’s groaning, his mouth is hanging open, he’s yelling Shane’s last name, his temple veins are throbbing, he’s red in the face and sweating.

It’s really hot.

[shanehollandered]

when your mouth says one thing but your face says something else: a story by ilya rozanov

[shanebug]

thank you sara @hereticlesbian for pointing this out to me... he is tragic and beautiful just like mary...

[virginshane]

shane hollander is mad gossip and a bitch otherwise he wouldn’t have bagged diva rozanov

[grabmyboner]

i just imagine when they hop in their car after like a group outing as soon as they’re in the car and the doors are locked shane starts the car and goes “so what the fuck was chad doing there? i heard that he cheated on tiffany with her cousin! can you believe that, babe? and then he comes to brunch as jessica’s plus one as if he didn’t know tiffany would fucking be there! i gotta text rose and sveta and tell them they’re gonna love this.” and ilya is like “yes yes chad is big man whore i heard he gave tiffany’s cousin chlamydia that’s how they found out he was cheating because her cousin and her realised they both had chlamydia at the same time!” and shane is like “nooooooo! shut the fuck up! Ilya! you’re lying!” and ilya is like “no shane! I swear on anya’s life!” and shane is frantically texting rose and sveta all this gossip in their parked car

[nightquills]

very amused to think of ilya rozanov thoughtfully selecting vanity license plates for all of his cars. paying a motherfucking fortune at the massachusetts DMV every year. taking his time going down the line of vehicles to carefully put the little stickers on each plate.

[boitterfly]

to name a few

[corpseprxnce]

I JUST WANT A MOTHERFUCKING KISS

[stelladiver81]

[hutsonwoolyums]

I have not read the books 🙈 but I know one of them is my tomato right

But I’m thinking he sees a commercial for a new Dyson vacuum with its superb triple action suction power and he looks at Shane and is like ohhhh my sweet Dyson 3000

Shane would roll his eyes so hard but also be secretly pleased.

[lavenderprose]

Ilya sometimes pulls up the nanny cam in Anya's bedroom while they're at practice and makes the other Centaurs say hi to her through the microphone. I say 'make' but to be clear they push each other to be the first to say hello to her because they're trying to see whose voice she likes best as judged by how fast her tail wags. After Ilya it's Harris, then Bood, then Chouinard, THEN Shane.

[meltygetswifi]

not to be a dirty commie or anything but i don't think any one person should have enough money to solve world hunger and then get to decide not to

[mojoscircus]

The smile that just lights up the world and gives me heart palpitations

[kateantropova]

HUDSON WILLIAMS BVLGARI

[firstprinced]

some giddy ilya for 🩷 rae @blushingrozy 🩷 #neverinlifehasheblushed

[shillanov]

ilya biting down gently on shane’s shoulder scar as he slowly sheathes himself in. i mean who said that

[themoonandmyman]

you know who said it baby, own it

[themoonandmyman]

Ilya reminiscing about the time he snorted cocaine off of a naked mime and now he’s 35 and stood in the kitchen making his own trail mix for a hike where Shane wants to go birdwatching

[notspecialbabe]

smoosh /smuːʃ/ verb, informal to squash, crush, or push objects faces together into a confined space

[sunnypeachyy]

Ilya's back appreciation post

[luckieangel]

when the vulnerability of missionary sex becomes too much and you go to cover your face with your hands only for him to gently grab your wrists with a single hand as he says, “don’t. please. i need to see you.”

[jewelcoatfish]

sometimes i see posts that make me go hmm shane hollander would agree