Everything Is Canon Here

Sailor Moon incorrect quotes sideblog run by beautymercurydragon. Some quotes from my other blogs can be found here, as well original and exclusive ones. Daily posts, multiple at once. Submissions and asks always open for suggestions.

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

To keep it classy, I'll take a pregnancy test on Mother's Day.

Minako

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Minako: You need to make them think you're stronger than you actually are.

Usagi: That's what you do.

Minako: Me? Oh no. My power is no illusion. I can fucking demolish you.

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Oops, I committed tax fraud, and I'm wanted by the Chinese government for 15 federal crimes... sucks being a, uh, Libra.

Minako

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Makoto: I don't want to lie anymore.

Ami: Makoto-

Haruka: Lie about what?

Makoto: *sighs* It's Ami. I've been dating Ami.

Everyone:

Everyone: AMI??!!

Rei: *stands up* Mako's not the only one!

Usagi: *gasps* You're dating Ami, too?

Rei: What? No- I...

Rei: *sighs* Minako's always been my best friend, but now I love her.

Minako: *stands up and hugs Rei*

Michiru: Wait a minute...

Michiru: *counting with her fingers* Makoto and Ami... Rei and Minako? You mean...

Michiru: I'VE BEEN KEEPING MY RELATIONSHIP WITH HARUKA A SECRET THIS WHOLE TIME FOR NOTHING??

Haruka: Babe...

Chibiusa: *uncontrollably sobbing* I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE!!!

Makoto: Wait, you have a girlfriend?

Chibiusa: Yeah... she's one of my friends from school, Hotaru.

Usagi: *throws her hands in the air* Now wait a gosh-darned second!

Everyone:

Usagi: Is there anybody else who's going to come out?

Everyone: ...

Setsuna: *appears out of nowhere* I don't like anyone!

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Jadeite: *holding out a hand* Hey Rei, wanna dance with a cool guy?

Rei: I'd love to. Where is he?

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Minako: When the snow melts, what does it become?

Rei: Water.

Minako: *hits buzzer*

Minako: When the snow melts, it becomes spring.

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

I feel a disturbance in the force... there's joy? In my office?

Beryl

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Kunzite: Zoisite is a precious cinnamon roll who's never done anything wrong in his entire life!

Nephrite: Never done anything wrong?! He set an entire city block on FIRE!

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

*At Usagi and Mamoru’s wedding*

Pastor: If anyone wishes to object, speak now or forever hold your peace.

Rei: I object!

Rei: It has been a true pleasure watching your distracting and childish rivalry evolve into a distracting childish courtship, and now into what I’m sure will be a distracting childish marriage.

[justformemylife]

Bold of you to assume Rei isn’t the one officiating this distracting childish marriage

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

HAHAHA YOU’RE RIGHT

But if you wanna know, it’s actually Setsuna who’s officiating the distracting childhood marriage (their aro-ace mom friend lol)

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Kunzite: It's all my fault.

Jadeite: No, it's my fault.

Zoisite: No, both of you. It's my fault.

Nephrite: Yeah, that's true. It's their faults.

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Rei: Usagi may annoy me to pieces, but she's never lied to me.

Usagi: Thanks for the compliment... I think?

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Prof. Tomoe: Do you know why I have a female attack dog?

Haruka: Because bitches stick together?

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

I wouldn't say Rei is a close friend of mine. I say 'hi', she says 'shut the fuck up'.

Usagi

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

I don't regret a thing, because following rules is gay and I'm bi.

Makoto probably

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Ami: Rei.

Rei: Ami.

Usagi: Usagi.

Ami: Okay, you just said your own name.

Usagi: It was the only one left.

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Haruka: Does Setsuna ever sleep?

Michiru: I think she periodically makes a whirring noise and then shuts down.

[canonincorrectsailormoonquotes]

Haruka: Hewwo! I will be youw suwgeon today! Intewnal bweeding you say? Wet's make ouw fiwst wittle incision.

Michiru: Doctow, we're wosing them!!

Haruka: Quick, hand me the defibwiwatow!

Setsuna: Please, turn off my fucking life support.