Let each day be your masterpiece.

Hi. 30. I write. This is an archive of my originals. Most of these are kind of old, but I'm working on it. I want to write more. I just refuse to write without inspiration.

[just-call-me-darling]

I didn’t know how to unlove you

Cuz you can’t undo what’s been done

I blocked it out, sealed it shut with glue

That’s how those battles were won

But then you’d arrive, an instant trigger

You face, your smile, your eyes, your voice

And the avalanche would fall, bigger and bigger

And my heart screamed that it had no choice

See, love is weird, with its many levels,

Definitions, rules, and something scientific

You’re a saint, he’s alright, the other’s a devil

But I love you all in a way so specific

Here’s to the past, the future, and the days in between

Where love is a choice and less of a rush

I thank God daily I’m no longer a teen

But with that being said, I think I have a crush.

[capolavoro]

Maybe once everything is settled and the dust all clears, you’ll still be there... with your kind eyes and your fits of laughter and your surprisingly gentle touch.

And maybe not.

I’m sorry I hurt you. But I pray you find someone to look back at you with kind eyes and gentleness. Someone whose heart isn’t already taken.

[just-call-me-darling]

[just-call-me-darling]

[capolavoro]

My first time doing a sermon for the youth group. Just wanted to archive it here.

[just-call-me-darling]

12:52 AM //

And I’m laying here In my bed Anxious for the next step of life Excited for our next step of life Scared of taking a wrong step in life And all around drowning in the thought of you

Because I have never loved Anyone like I love you And you are so kind And so gentle And so patient Because you are love

I saw the way You looked at me With our legs entwined With our noses touching With my eyes struggling to stay open I have never felt such peace

You are home We will keep moving forward I am so proud He is so good to us

Keep looking up with those moon eyes that crinkle at the corners I wouldn’t have you any other way.

[capolavoro]

Long overdue.

I write things in my notes and forget to post them on here. So there they are.

[capolavoro]

Black Bear (or is it Sloth?)

I see you in half-colors, cupcake frosting & a pillow to rest your head on. You remind me of the beach, when the sun is hot and you close your eyes to drift off into warmth into no apologies, you take me for me and I can't remember the last time i was myself around anyone. You're so quiet Speak up Come out and play I will be nice I almost always am so nice Sometimes all I want to say is "I want you in the worst way, do you want me too?" You're the kind of person I want to make breakfast with half naked after waking up to your razor-sharp teeth and velvety-soft skin, or share a cigarette with in the middle of the night under a blanket of stars, still dripping sweat from an evening romp, or maybe just get tacos with at 2 am because we had to get out of the house that strangled our voices. Why didn't you kiss me more? Do you not like my lips? This is all fine and dandy but I would like some real words every now and then. If you expose your soul and spit out your feelings, my clothes will come off quicker. I want to destroy you with the feathery softness of a butterfly's wing. I am not sure what day it is anymore but I am counting until I can feel you again.

[capolavoro]

River Flows In You

The greatest thing that amazes me is: I was writing about you before I even knew you.

Once upon a time I dreamed about having a person. Someone that not only understands me, but loves every inch that they get to know. Someone that excites me and opens my eyes. Someone that emphasizes a relationship based on love and acceptance. Someone that teaches me something new every day. Someone that truly captivates me.

You make me see teal. Aquamarine. You create kaleidoscopes that fragment my vision and design outbursts of chromatic hues that seem to be meant for my psyche only. I don’t want to let go. I don’t know how. I crave to absorb the iridescence of your thoughts.

You make me see red. Scarlet. My blood boils and my body throbs for your touch. I love you. I love you and lust after you and I feel it so deeply, so passionately. It almost hurts sometimes. You are my hurricane.

You make me see gold. The sun. I harbor hope now and seem to be dancing towards the light more often lately. You are a reservoir of happiness that shines on everybody you come in contact with and it is exquisite. You are an artist and every time you create a masterpiece, liquid gold violins play in my head.

You make me see blue. Navy. You are the night sky, the infinite, omniscient drape that imprisons the stars. You are a tormented soul... dark and beautiful and endlessly fascinating and you seize handfuls of radiant auras and rearrange them into pictures that somehow make sense.

 “My thoughts are stars that I cannot fathom into constellations” and you create a chaotic stream of consciousness that I am still trying to categorize. And yet. When I ask you to, you clear my head of all insecurities, doubts, fears and leave it perfectly still. Peace.

Your magic is the alchemy behind my eyes changing. Your spells are the serene surrender that lure me to sleep.

The odds of us finding each other are unbelievably slim. And yet. Here we are.

And I get the privilege of gazing at your perfect face. Your kind, symmetrical, empathetic, stunning face. Your lips make my heart race and your heart holds mine hostage. This new chapter feels like the most familiar thing in the world. My soul knew you. We were born for such a time as this.

Anytime you want to know how I truly feel, just plug in.

[just-call-me-darling]

[capolavoro]

Me: I am tired, but I am happy. My life is inconsistent, but it seems to always be in my favor. I am stressed, I am in love, I am exhausted. Got a poem for that?

Him: THE ANSWER IS BLUEBERRIES AND ALL OF THE ABOVE Sometimes we try to pull our ears off and 
sometimes we pull off our clothes instead 
and I can’t say which I prefer though I have 
an idea you have an idea that we have the same 
idea and sometimes there is nothing better than 
knowing that what ends doesn’t really end 
if you remember hard enough and I remember 
everything so hard it hurts it hurts my head 
and it hurts my beating heart but I love how 
hurt feels because I can remember much more 
how good naked feels. I love this so much more than any of you can comprehend.

[capolavoro]

WHEN YOUR MIND GOES A MILLION MILES AN HOUR, YOU HAVE TO DUMP THE CHAOS SOMEWHERE.

I’m so full; still curious.

If you were to ask me how I was doing, I would tell you that I am both happy and sad and I’m still trying to figure out how that could be.

He is my sunshine, and you are my moonlight.

Magic for an hour. Ecstasy for a moment. You are the ever-expanding blip on my radar and I didn’t expect you to become so engulfing. You have been thrown over the edge and now your maturity and selfishness are on overdrive as you try to claw your way out.

You know what you want. And you’re not going to stop until you get it.

Let’s push pause on the world and discover each other.  Use our lips and our fingertips to roam every inch of flesh, every scar, every freckle, every bump. I’m ravenous and your lips taste like the sweetest dishonesty; and maybe I want to live a lie for a little bit; and maybe being around you in the middle of the night makes time stand still. When the world is asleep, our demons come out and I think they play real well with each other.

I’m goin in for the kill.

[just-call-me-darling]

[just-call-me-darling]

I have a sort of selcouth yugen written in my DNA. I’m always wondering, Always wandering. I can rarely sit still because I want more than anything to just be a part of something. A part of everything. I want to stick my fingers in everyone’s pie and know that I’ve been everywhere and back. And when I sit outside and look at the stars, the moon huge and luminous, I am reminded of how small I am. How insignificantly tiny my existence is. I am aware of the fact that I am just a lot of nothing, a little bit of everything. It’s an unusual, bittersweet feeling. Overwhelming, but humbling. I am honored. I know I could die any second. But in a way, I am infinite. 

[just-call-me-darling]

We were flames Embers Coals And you are smoke Beautiful, but slipping through my fingertips.

And now we’re just ash Remains of something contagious Although it never got the momentum of a wildfire.

You never allowed it to.

We were the light in the darkness Teasing the sunset And tip-toeing on dangerous ground.

You engulfed me.

I allowed you to.

I tried to set everything of yours on fire Destroy it, Dance around my personal act of arson, But all I did was singe my fingertips.

Three quarters of a thumb print left, And with soot covered eyes And a half broken heart, The only direction of choice is forward.

No more being the light. I need to find the light.

You’ve allowed me to.

[just-call-me-darling]

[capolavoro]

original

[just-call-me-darling]

So this is my first attempt at spoken word… or maybe it’s just poetry. Idk.

[capolavoro]

Untitled

Borders Boundaries Shattered Crossed

Shadows fall on the floor And my loneliness sets with the sun I haven't spent one night in my own bed In a very long time

I can't sleep isolated The elixir of mixed flesh is my NyQuil And it's always delightful to role play love Just call me an ingenue

Dawn is very becoming on you With messy hair and sleepy eyes I think of the way you would play with your child And how I could get used to this

It's not right quite yet But I'm still figuring things out And I guess this is all part of growing up Am I an adult now?