too old and tired for fandom drama

Minors don't interact | 28 | they/them | love my fictional men

[pandemicedemic]

columbina & zandik

[kjthelabrat]

6.6 spoilers?

One big Dottoling (and Pantaling) family <3 After what happened, I just want them to be happy-

[maximwtf]

“So, did you bring any?”

Pantalone x G/N Reader

Words: 2290

Warnings: Some 6.6 spoilers but not straight from the AQ, most from the medical records, Established relationship (marriage), some surgery description and scars from it, slight angst / maybe comfort idk anymore, Pantalone doesn’t like taking care of himself, smoker of 145 years or something, Pantalone really wants a cigarette.

Summary: You go visit Pantalone after his lung transplant, both you and Dottore hoping that the banker would have been a little more willing to change his ways after the operation. But you know him better than that.

AN// I was so excited to see Pantalone in the AQ and I somehow managed to play the whole quest and write this thing in the same day. I don’t know what happened but this scenario engraved itself into my head the second I saw the medical reports for him so enjoy <3 I'll add him to the characters I write for as well, my requests are open :)

“So, did you bring any?”

For a man fearful of death, Pantalone certainly did not watch over his health very well. He skipped sleep and meals, kept a strict control of his work so it somehow stayed as stressful as possible, got himself beat up in various different ways for his work and lastly, he smoked. Every free moment you saw him he had one on hand, taking long drags as if it could have removed the stress riddling his frail form. 

The banker had contracted pneumonia somewhere along the way and it’d somehow slipped past you, all the way up until you’d received a message from one of Dottore's segments that your husband had ended up in his care once more. This was by no means the first and likely not the last time he would end up there, but you were rarely called to come and see him after. Pantalone might have presented himself as a more of a frail bodied man with no keen interest in exerting himself in fights, but he still somehow managed to crawl back on his feet injury after another. And for that reason, you couldn’t find it in you to worry; not even when you didn’t know the full details of the operation that'd taken place. As eerie as having anything to do with Dottore was, he was skilled at what he did and he could be ethical if he so wished. 

Being notified by one of the many segments was one thing but going down into the doctor’s lab was another story. The place looked like an insane asylum in your eyes compared to the lavish places Pantalone kept you in; he would have put you in the Northland Bank itself if he could have, for safekeeping. He wasn't very keen on having you witness the darker side of his businesses, knowing very well what the true currency of the bank was. You were better kept on the outside to present a clean upfront.

 But the lab, so gloomy and devoid of any surface light. It smelled like parchment, ink and disinfectant from the sterile operating rooms. Machines whirring and distant speech always coming from one place or another, a few segments making their way past you without much attention as you descended further down. 

You hadn’t been given many details, only a brief description of his pneumonia and the surgery that’d been performed thereafter. The thought of the operations done down here caused chills to run down your body, not wishing to imagine it any further. Your husband could have chosen any capable doctor in any nation he pleased, and this had been his choice. You would have scolded him for this if you hadn’t seen how well Pantalone had recovered and risen back to the living each time. Dottore may have felt like a snake in a labcoat but he seemed to know what he was doing and that was all you needed to know, finding no interest in whatever else was being performed down here.

You made your way to the lowest floor, somewhat familiar with the layout even without having been down in the lab too many times. Being able to forget a place like this would have needed a surgery of its own, and you had rather not inquired about that any further. Making sure you didn’t touch anything unnecessary, you made your way to the familiar door that Pantalone laid behind. Your hand paused on the handle for a moment before making quick work of disappearing inside the room to avoid thinking of what was going on behind your back even in that very moment. 

The room was gloomy, not lavish by any means. There was a fan whirring in the ceiling, no windows and sharp medical lights keeping the room lit, it all felt very cold and uninviting; quite clear that Dottore didn’t have quests over very often. Pantalone laid on a bed situated by a small steel table. On the other side of the bed resided an IV bag and another silently beeping machine. There was a closet on the other side of the room, presumably holding his clothing as you noticed Feofan wasn’t wearing his own, instead something more like a hospital gown. He didn’t appear to be awake but the rise and fall of his chest was an indicator enough that the man was alive. 

You stationed yourself beside the bed on the most uncomfortable chair imaginable; how kind of Dottore. You didn’t have the heart to jostle him awake, so instead you turned to empty your bag of the items you’d brought in for him. A brief amount of food and a drink, something you didn’t have high hopes of him consuming without being forced to. You placed them on the table but as you reached back your fingers brushed against a container, an almost guilty reminder of the cigarettes you knew he’d ask for as soon as those eyes opened again. You felt almost like an accomplice in all this, providing them to him before he even managed to ask. 

Dottore likely had his reasons for keeping your husband alive like this, going through so much trouble even if he appeared so busy all the time. You recalled him asking if you could try and sway Pantalone’s mind from smoking so much on the daily, but you weren’t so sure if he would have even asked you to come now had he known you snuck the cigarettes in for the man. Maybe you weren’t such a good influence on him as one would imagine. 

You left the cigarettes in your bag in the false hope that Pantalone wouldn’t ask for them, even if that hope was futile. You knew him better than to truly believe that.

He appeared peaceful for now, medicated enough to rest. Which funnily enough looked like the most restful sleep he’d gotten in a while; maybe being beat truly was the only way to slow him down for a moment. You watched him with fondness that was hard to hide even in a place like this. He was a strong man by mind, you couldn’t deny that; but you would have preferred to not see him in such condition as many times as you had. And he knew that, of course he did. But even he wasn’t foolish enough to ever promise you a better future where cases like this would never have to repeat themselves.

Some of his dark hair was sticking to his forehead which you leaned in to fix; keeping your hand near his cheek with the ring he'd bought for you against his skin. From so close it was hard not to notice the fresh scars across his chest, neatly put back together and cleaned up. You placed your palm over the junction of still smooth skin near his collar, feeling the even breaths he was taking. For one reason or another, even as the reality of the operation had started to sink in, you didn’t feel fear or shock anymore. You were almost more interested in why he felt the need to tamper with his body in such a way. You’d seen the operation scars and little fix ups here and there across his body, and the way he dressed from head to toe for more important meetings to hide most of them under fancy fabrics. You weren’t sure if he ever felt guilt for running himself to ruin like that or if it worked as fuel for the man to keep going; he never told you of such things even if he felt regret for any of it.

A couple pieces of paper were stacked on top of each other on the bedside table. You gave them a quick look with interest and crossed your legs before picking them up, skimming through the medical wording to better understand what’d happened. It didn’t take long to see that it hadn’t just been the pneumonia, but a necrosis in his lungs. You gazed at him over the papers again, a sharp look of pity with a hint of hope. Maybe he’d wake up with a revelation on why he should quit smoking and take care of himself.

Your attention returned to the papers, eyeing over the notes left by the segment that had performed the procedure. ‘Upon briefly gaining consciousness, the patient requested smokes. The request was denied,’ was written as the last report on the case along with a recommendation of cessation for smoking and a recommendation of calling for you to persuade him further. You gave the latter an amused hum, knowing how futile of an attempt it was. It was like asking him to start clocking out on time, it was never going to happen and you knew better than to keep asking him. 

When you lowered the papers again, a pair of deep violet eyes were on you this time, worn as ever but somehow still expectant of what was to come. “You gave me a fright, you know?” You started while folding the papers away back onto the table. “Yet you found amusement from the operation files?” He shot back, seemingly having kept his wits about him, though you could tell his voice was worn and that he couldn’t hide from you. You were going to explain to him what you’d discovered from the files but he beat you to it. “Did you bring any cigarettes?” He asked while carefully shuffling on the bed to sit up, ultimately looking to you for assistance after the stitches across his chest protested against moving. You wanted to roll your eyes at him but before you could, you found yourself helping him settle against the back of the bed and the wall behind it. “I told you this would happen if you didn’t stop,” your words were firm but laced with the worry that hadn’t quite surfaced before when he was still peacefully asleep. He gave you a slight wave of his hand to abandon the topic while you tugged the covers of the bed on him a little better. “There is no certain proof of cause. I’m sure Dottore told you about the pneumonia?” His half-lidded eyes followed you as you walked across the room to the closet. “Oh he did. I also read about the extensive necrosis in the same organs.” Your words held a subtle scowl that didn’t go unnoticed by him, causing Pantalone to fall silent for your sake; you weren’t worth angering over this. “Haha, they are now good as new, you needn’t worry.” But his words were only a subtle comfort in the grand scheme of his slow self destruction. He was a man who could spin many situations back in his favour, and those same tricks might have worked on you in the past but not so much anymore. “Do I not? As far as I recall, you requested those very cigarettes the moment you woke up.”

You made your way back beside him, offering his glasses to him so he didn’t need to squint while looking at you. He accepted the offer but not without purposely brushing his hand against yours to lower it enough for a chaste kiss over yours in silent apology. “So, did you bring any?” He was insufferable, truly running you lost with any morales you might have thought you had left. A sigh managed to escape as you untangled your hand and reached for the pack, picking one stick out and placing it on the table beside the bed along with a lighter, accompanied by a thud as a warning. “You’ll get the rest when you manage to stand up.” You could see his lips part in protest but the man in him that didn’t crave conflict with you didn’t allow him to continue any further. He watched silently as you walked back to the closet and placed the pack into the inner pocket of his coat. 

“No matter how long you live, you cannot treat yourself so badly while also taking the blows from work, even if you trust that Dottore will stitch you back together.” You spoke with a little more agitation while closing up the closet. “Do you think it’s enjoyable to watch you turn into something that resembles more of a ragdoll than a human?” His lips formed a thin line before replacing it with the more familiar calm smile, understanding of his small ground for arguments. “Oh please, dear. You don’t really believe that, do you?” His hand reached out for you, which you took a hold of but not without giving a sharp look his way. “You know exactly what I mean.” But any commanding tone from your voice had been sedated, replaced by what you could only recognize as subtle despair. And that hadn’t gone unnoticed either even if Pantalone mentioned nothing of it. 

You knew better than to let a moment like this go to waste though. You wouldn’t otherwise use the affections of your husband against him, but now it was only fair. “I brought you food, you should eat before I leave you to rest.” You opened the items for him mindlessly, not hearing any protests from him, either out of defeat or respect. Either way, as insufferable as he was, you still found yourself helping him eat in the silence of the room while the fan in the ceiling kept whirring and the steady beep recording his vitals played in the background. He was a sad sight to look at now, and you knew he didn’t necessarily want you to be here now either; and for that he would pay you back as soon as he was back on his feet. 

[sharathos]

yeah i'm not dead (physically), anyway here is a lil sketch of our beloved banker.

[message-lost]

there’s a school project due tomorrow

[monstermaniac]

" Birds of the feather don't always have the same fate. "

[thewiglesswonder]

I immediately thought of that one video of the plague doctor jauntily walking in the park

[rockingbytheseaside]

✦ Height difference

[vincc-wrs]

ladynoir

[artkaolinite91]

(12/365) Dottolisa- After battle (copium)

Oh my I forgot, I supposed to post daily here...and there's actually already 23 artworks in total and the last one was number 11... 😂

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Anyway I was so sad with the AQ because Dottore vanished (although the glitch maybe foreshadow for his return), so I thought well he vanished to my teapot! Being pampered by my Lisa and his sister, my columbina! Hahaha *delulu for trululu

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Aaaand just after the AQ, there's lokal Genshin event and I got these!!! My fave ofc the Dottore's brochure lol

🚫Do not use, edit, reupload my arts, thx!!

[missingalo]

I couldn't get the image out of my head-

[parttimefae]

YOU MISS 100% OF THE SHOTS YOU DON’T TAKE

you think he’s terribly annoying… pff he totally doesn’t care…right?

CHARACTERS [seperate] varka, flins, wanderer, lohen

WARNINGS suggestiveness !!!! flins makes innuendos, trigger warning for second hand embarrassment in wanderers ngl, lohen’s a little weird, kay? is he considered a yandere idfk im not well versed enough in that but he is pretty obsessed with reader

NOTES writing before lohens release so take his characterization with a heap of salt. also ignore typos this was written off of a blunt lmao.

fem!reader !!! she/her pronouns are used

VARKA

if you could use one word to describe grandmaster varka it would be irritating.

blowing away and splattering all the food you’re delivering with his vision accidentally while playing around with klee? irritating. getting down on his knees, kissing your hand and swearing on his knighthood he’s sorry in front of everyone in mondstadt’s square? even more irritating. spilling his ginormous cup of beer on your dress when you happen to both be out at the same time—do you even need to say it? it’s irritating.

you appreciate what he does as a grandmaster for the greater people of mondstadt but barbatos does he hinder your life. if anyone asked you, you’d prefer to stray away from wherever he ends up.

he feels contrary to you. he thinks you’re fascinating. gorgeous, pristine, kind-hearted, intelligent, and by the archons does he love your cooking at the good hunter. he’s irrevocably endeared with you. if anyone were to ask him, he’d say he’d like to be (honored to be) in your presence constantly. it really is a shame his motor and social skills run out the window whenever you’re around. i mean the only reason he vision-malfunctioned was because his brain dead-stopped seeing you looking all pretty. he may be the grandmaster and greatest hero of mondstadt but he is a man after all. at least that’s how he sees it.

he’s aware you don’t like hate him, he’s aware his initial attempt at your forgiveness made you more embarrassed and upset than you already were, but if he’s one thing, it’s an alcoholic perseverant. so he will try everything in his power to win you over!

carrying bags? he’ll swing by and take those off your hands…maybe flex his muscles a little bit in front of you too but that’s totally unintentional. worried about creeps on your walk home before leaving the angel’s share? diluc move, varka’ll walk you back! believe me if you barged into the KoF headquarters and asked him to do something, he’d drop all his work in an instant to get it done… just please don’t hate him anymore.

you essentially have him on a leash, at least that’s what diluc tells you while sliding you over a drink.

you hate to admit that he is useful…sometimes.

you’re coming back to mondstadt with a delivery payment when hillichurls corner you halfway back. shit. you’re mulling over what the fuck do do when a slice of air flies past you and the hillichurls dissipate at the hands of two greatswords before you can even process it.

there’s the grand master, broad shoulders, scruffy blond hair and all, standing before you and towering over your frame.

“are you alright, ma’am?” he asks, voice laced with concern. of course he still insists upon calling you ma’am.

you mutter something’s small about being fine, flustered with how his bright blue eyes and annoyingly cute dimples stare down at you.

“well then it seems my job here is done. would you like me to walk you back to the city, ma’am?”

“i-it’s fine—just thank you.” you probably look like an idiot right now, craning your neck to look up at him and a stupid awkward grimace because you’re flustered. curse varka and his endearing smile. curse him especially for what you do next—varka’s fault of course. you shift all your weight to your tippie-toes and lean upwards just in time to kiss him on his cheek, right beneath his most prominent scar. you don’t think you’ve ever seen him so flustered.

he tries to say something but mumbled gibberish just comes out. his skin flushes marinara sauce red, his hands tense up and twitch, his stupid smirk transforms into a nervous awestruck half smile like a bee-stung dog.

you turn and walk away, just as flustered as he, muttering a barely coherent, “bye, sir varka.” and he just stands there like an idiot, hands still twitching and wandering randomly like he doesn’t know what to do with them (he’s nervy okay). by the time his hands finally know what to do, one of them drifts up to trace over where you kissed (blessed him essentially) his cheek like he’s not sure if you just did that. you did. he knows this is not very knightly language but holy shit.

no one’s sure why but the grandmaster seems to be in extra good spirits the following week.

FLINS

you swear to the archons flins was put on teyvat specifically to frustrate you.

him and his stupid flirty comments, stupidly handsome face you roll your eyes at, his ‘gentlemanly’ demeanor and his incredibly long eyelashes you’re honestly kinda jealous of. they’re all exceptionally frustrating.

if you hear “m’lady” or “allow me” (typically as he redirects you from a gathering of wild hunt and insists upon protecting you) in that smooth, droning voice again you’ll send his pasty ass back to snezhnaya yourself.

and the insistence upon taking your hand as he leads you back to the nearest area cleared of the wild hunt before returning to his post is absurd.

oh and then there’s the rather suggestive and frankly embarrassing comments.

arguing about how you are able to defend yourself and aren’t his damsel in distress to project his savior complex on— “solving this dilemma will not be hard. i believe i can satisfy your nerves in many, many ways m’lady.”

disgusted by the smell of fire-water on his breath as you both end up at the flagship coincidentally— “my apologies, miss. i did not think i was close enough to you for you to catch a whiff of my breath,” he laughs in a low drawl that upsets you further. “and to think i was mulling over getting closer.” i mean what the hell does that mean ???

him jumping in and saving you from those weird abyssal eyes—“as expected, i’m sure you’re a commodity to all eyes.”

and every single time he chuckles as you fluster and snap your head away, still staring at you with those bright yellow eyes that occasionally drift lower as you look away. that stupid chuckle that makes you feel halfway to hell. and the immediate follow up of “i assure you i do not intend to mock you.” yeah, right.

yeah, the ‘gentleman act’? you’re not buying it. you find the act unbearable, especially when he’s constantly following you around.

patrolling? flins somehow find himself there, claiming he’ll help since it’s his ‘downtime’. isn’t he supposed to be working constantly?

“it’s quite disheartening to see your distain for me. i presumed i’d grow on you but you still drive me away.”

“well i’d like you much better if you stopped following me around everywhere like a lost puppy.”

“i admit i have an affinity for you, i think anybody can assume that much.”

“well your mocking laughter and judgmental stares don’t convey that, sir flins.”

“i can assure you the looks are not judgemental, it’s placed in admiration, m’lady.” he pauses. “and you may call me kyryll, i insist.”

you stutter, flustered from him again. “shut up! go patrol on that side if you’d like to be in my good graces.”

“as you wish, m’lady.”

“stop calling me that!”

you’re still under the assumption he does this purely to annoy you, maybe one day you’ll realize he just wants that cookie so effing bad.

WANDERER

he does NOT care what you think about him… okay maybe he does… just a little bit tho. and he will NEVER admit it.

you’re a fellow student at the akademiya who is honestly fed up with his terribly annoying ego. he acts as if he’s entitled to something—as if he was like an important figure in an important organization at one point… like??

his fuckass hat and his even worse ego drive you especially mad when you’re assigned to peer review each other and he’s so pissy the whole time.

unbeknownst to you he’s not that big of a dick, close to half of it is a little tsundere persona to make you think he’s just playing hard to get. that way, he won’t have to do all the cringy “asking each other out” and, what he calls “ushy mushy romantic” things. ew.

so instead he’s spewing things like, “how in teyvat did you even get through the entrance exam if this is how your work looks?”

“you might aswell start over.”

he knows your work is good, probably better than his, but he’s trying to play hard to get—don’t you get it? unfortunately you don’t and you are sick of it.

“you know, wanderer, maybe if you got rid of that sorry excuse for a haircut you could get women on your dick and stop taking out all your frustrations on my work.” and then you storm out… babe not acquired :/ and wait—is his haircut really that bad? aunty nahida said he looked handsome… :(((

maybe that’s when he realizes he’s being a little too harsh and that his little tsundere act to try and get you to be into him won’t work.

he physically cannot ask anyone else for relationship advice out of embarrassment though so he will suffer in silence (he’s dramatic it’s really not that bad) for a while.

right up until the archons themselves bless him and give you two a group project together (along with other people but they don’t really matter to him). unfortunately, after your last interactions you want utterly nothing to do with him. his extremely blunt and non constructive criticism from before has in fact bit him in the ass.

maybe he needs to swallow his pride and ask for advice—not maybe, he does. but archons this really sucks. so he sends an anonymous letter to yae publishing house, apparently his mom’s girlfriend is pretty good in this whole romance thing so maybe she’ll help.

he gets his advice… it just turns out this influenced yae miko to develop a new short romance gl novel based on this experience. sure, nobody knows the new best seller is based on his (non-existent) romance scene and now turned lesbian but he can’t help but be embarrassed every time he sees it sitting shelved in a stall.

he takes the advice, leaves a corny letter by your apartment door step (in which he bolted away from incase anybody saw him) and said an…APOLOGY. very rare from him so you better not take this for granted. he felt so goddamn embarrassed the next time he saw you on campus—so embarrassed he was actually begging the archons that someone kills him when you greeted him.

you will unfortunately have to be the one to ask him out though—he just gets so nervy!! he ignored that part of the advice from the letter—and the part suggesting he grip your thigh to ‘assert dominance’ ??? what type of things are her and his mom into ?yuck! but he will be so corny the whole time you’re out on your first date. guy is tryna act like a nonchalant cool guy the whole time it’s like actually embarrassing. but it’s even more embarrassing when he gets flustered or asked something he didn’t rehearse in the mirror beforehand.

“so, wanderer, what do you like to do?”

“i don’t like a lot of things.”

“am i one of them?”

“uh..um—y-yeah, sure.” (picture this with a voice crack halfway through i’m dying)

somehow he does manage to bag you—probably only because of his face because archons does this man not know how to smooth talk.

he’d like to thank himself, kinda yae miko and a first date tips book he discretely took and returned to/from the akademiya library.

LOHEN

this vice captain has it BAD for you, his subordinate, and frankly it’s bad for you because of how much he follows you around like an annoying bug. as in an annoying fly that won’t go away and continues to buzz around in your face.

make a suggestion that he really has no business listening to as your superior? you’re immediately getting hit back with a, “yes! what an amazing idea!” running a secret mondstadt holiday gift exchange? he will purposefully pick your name and go way above the suggested mora pricing. on that note i think he’d be so upset if you got another person—worse enough another man that’s TALLER </3. and yes on every single matter he will default to your opinion !

i’d assume everybody else is probably terribly annoyed with his very clear favoritism…including you. he thinks he’s being so romantic and so sweet, meanwhile you’re like “huh?” every time he follows you around like a golden retriever, or more accurately a weird, scruffy little stray husky that you fed crumbs once and keeps coming back to your door step.

makes it so clear he wants you around. he is so damn insistent you’re free to come to his office with any questions whenever—code for: “please please please come to my office oh barbatos if you love me she’ll come to my office and she’ll profess her love to me”

unfortunately for him when you actually do go to his office, it’s to tell him to not be so clear with his favoritism as your colleagues and comrades have started to hate you. aw man :(((

he infact does not stop though because he #wantsthatcookie. and like c’mon can you just do that professing love thing already—does barbatos really not love him :/ he’s already defeated and brought back a ruin guard’s part for you, claiming it was “out of appreciation for his hardest working subordinate”, isn’t that romantic enough ? you stared at him and asked why he thought you would like that. hmm maybe he should try more conventional gifts.

eventually somebody has to sit him down and tell him that showing his very obvious obsession with you in all the ways he does will not get him the girl. okay fine whatever he’ll try “asking you on a date” eyeroll. and “not following you around begging for your attention” ughh. fine.

believe his surprise when you actually like it better when he’s normal about you. he even heard through the grapevine you said he’s looked “better” lately. now you blush and happily accept when he offers to take you out for drinks. was it really that simple from the start? (yes it really was)

that whole night he’s just talking your ear off but it’s honestly kind of… endearing? it’s like if that stray little husky got his coat washed and groomed.

the night ends with a kiss on his cheek and oh my archons he’s over the moon. guys fighting demons to not act all obsessed again—keyword act. this man would let you feed him to wolves of wolvendom and like it.

but he does use his weirdo rizz on you and it does work. not even satirically, surprise to everybody, he does end up with the girl—so fuck you to barbatos and everyone else that doubted him. you are in for a RIDE once you’re together. do not expect to be separated from him at all. and now he actually has an excuse to be completely off his rocker when another person talks to you. his nightmares probably consist of you going on an expedition with another man honestly.

[familywhitesilk]

My love language for the character is to draw them with a big old flintlock rifle

[systemerror-rory]

Beautiful

[drawsry]

[artkaolinite91]

(21/365) Dottolisa - It's Photoshoot time!!

Hehehe I love to visited him whenever I have No Resins. I even have a dedicated team to do the photoshoot conveniently xD

On the third week I already defeated him 17 times.

But apparently a Dottore fans in twt already defeated him 200+ time whoaa such dedication hahaha

🚫Do not use, edit, reupload my arts, thx!!

[artkaolinite91]

(34/365) What if: Playable Dottore can't interact with Statue of Seven?

Just a random thought that I have some days ago..hahaha

🚫 do not use, edit, repost, reupload my arts, thx!!!