Thoughts.

Making sense of life one random thought at a time.

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Pretty in pink.

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Death of a Spouse.

The death of a spouse or partner is different than other losses, in the sense that it literally changes every single thing in your world going forward.  When your spouse dies, the way you eat changes.  The way you watch TV changes.  Your friend circle changes (or disappears entirely).  Your family dynamic/life changes (or disappears entirely).  Your financial status changes.  Your job situation changes.  It affects your self-worth.  Your self-esteem.  Your confidence.  Your rhythms. The way you breathe.  Your mentality.  Your brain function.  (Ever heard the term “Widow Brain”?  If you don’t know what that is, count yourself as very lucky.)  Your physical body.  Your hobbies and interests.  Your sense of security.  Your sense of humor.  Your sense of womanhood or manhood.  EVERY. SINGLE. THING. CHANGES.  You are handed a new life you never asked for and that you don’t particularly want.  It is the hardest, most gut-wrenching, horrific, life-altering of things to live with.  

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Peace starts with me.

(No copyright infringement intended.)

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Peace.

“First keep the peace within yourself, then you can also bring peace to others.”

- Thomas A Kempis

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Teach peace.

I used “Teach Peace” as my avatar.  I have always believed that if everyone taught their children about peace - a peaceful mind, peaceful reactions, peace towards others - that this world would be a kinder place.  Of course, it wouldn’t eliminate aggression entirely but I think it would do away with a great deal of it.    Maybe that’s just wishful thinking but I’m going to try to be peaceful anyway.

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Random prettiness.

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Kavanaugh.

It’s a shame there wasn’t a legal, lawful investigation into the accusation against Kavanaugh.  If he was a regular person there would have been.  There should’ve been regardless.  All accusations of sexual assault should be investigated properly.

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Kavanaugh.

I’ve been thinking about the Ford/Kavanaugh situation.  It’s really dividing our country right now.  People are being so hateful about this; Democrats and Republicans are at each others’ throats with nasty accusations.  It’s really a shame.  My bottom-line opinion has nothing to do with politics.  I don’t care what the different parties have to say.  I don’t care that the accuser is a Democrat and the accused a Republican.  That has nothing to do with it.  What I care about is the accusation itself.  An accusation of sexual assault of any kind is serious and should be addressed no matter the political affiliation of each person.  If this was an ordinary person making the accusation there would be a proper investigation.  It’s the law and as it should be.  That is what should be happening now.  And since sexual assault is against the law then yes, Kavanaugh’s appointment to the Supreme Court should have been put on hold until this was resolved.  The lawmakers voting his appointment deserve to know beforehand if he is guilty.  Is she telling the truth?  Maybe not.  Is he?  Maybe not.  But we should’ve had a legal investigation, not just a question and answer hearing to find out the truth, and we must trust in the system to get to the bottom of it.

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Drug addiction.

Here is an opinion making the rounds on Facebook these days:

“I might lose some friends and family for this post, but it’s just my opinion on things. Take it how you want.

A common topic these days is that addiction is a disease. Addiction is not a disease, it is a choice. I am not saying that I don’t feel bad for those who are struggling with it because it is a terrible thing. A lot of addictions start as a gateway for people who are struggling with things in life, so they turn to drugs to get high or get away from their problems. Then they become addicted or want to try other drugs to get a better high and they become so addicted that they end up stealing from people and losing their jobs or in the hospital. This is not a disease! This is a choice that they chose to make. You don’t get a choice if you get sick with cancer or any other disease, but you do get to choose not to be an addict by SIMPLY NEVER DOING IT IN THE FIRST PLACE!!! You can’t help someone who doesn’t want help!!!”

The above is someone’s opinion but it is certainly not the opinion of an addiction specialist.  For many years the experts have known that addiction is indeed a disease.  There are physiological changes which occur in the brain of an addict; changes which make the body dependent upon drugs.  Yes, a choice is made initially to use drugs but no one chooses to become addicted.  It’s ironic that the author of this post says that no one chooses to get cancer yet smokers who develop lung cancer choose to smoke.  Think about it; this author is saying that a person who chooses to use drugs and becomes addicted has chosen to be an addict and therefore addiction is not a disease.  However, a person who chooses to smoke and develops lung cancer has not chosen to get cancer so cancer is a disease.  That makes no sense.  It’s contradictory.  Cancer, and many other diseases can be prevented by making good choices yet this author is condemning addicts by stating that addiction is not a disease.  Sometimes I think we’re too judgmental in our society; why can’t we just accept what the experts (who are certainly more knowledgeable than the average person) tell us and try to help people who struggle with drug use?  What good does it do us, them and our society to simply condemn the addicts?  They obviously need help but the author assumes that every addict doesn’t want it.  This is simply not true; many addicts want help and cannot get it.  This needs to be changed; help for addiction needs to be more readily available and affordable.

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No copyright infringement intended.