❥ — alhaitham x g/n spouse! reader (genshin impact)
warning: there’s a part that implies you and alhaitham going at it (aka having sex), but it’s not written as a smut scene, just implied bc i’m too much of a pussy to actually write smut (also bc i worry it’ll be too cringy).
There were multiple ways you can describe your relationship dynamic with Alhaitham. Golden retriever and black cat, Yin and Yang, the sun and moon, anything that screamed “opposites attract” because that’s how you and Alhaitham were like after all! You were more bubbly and outgoing while Alhaitham was simply more stoic and brooding.
Perfect match! Especially since your smile was able to melt even the coldest of expressions he wears. It’s no wonder he married you! I suppose that explains why Alhaitham decided for you to live with him and share the exact same room and bed as him.
Oh, and of course you also lived with his roommate; Kaveh who was very much sick and tired of you both, complaining about you two everyday. Like the time Alhaitham had to leave to the Akademiya for a bit and decided to peck your lips softly, much to your delight as you embraced him tightly.
All while Kaveh watched with an absolutely disgusted look.
“Couldn’t even wait till I left the room—can you two go make out somewhere else?! Other people live here, you know?!”
“It was a peck. Would you like one too? You are pretty lonely after all, maybe you get a bit jealous by seeing a happily married couple around you everyday.”
Yes, that first bit came out of Alhaitham’s mouth.
He also learned the hard way that living with a married couple included needing to spend 10 Mora to get earplugs as you and Alhaitham had a very touchy and expressive way of showing how much you love each other. He just hopes a baby doesn’t end up being the result of it. The thought of a mini Alhaitham running around sent him shivers…
Every morning after those nights usually included Kaveh sending you and Alhaitham a death glare, and trying to get you two to quiet down was useless.
Kaveh would groan to himself, running a hand down his face one morning as he stood in-front of the kitchen counter, “Unbelievable…Every morning. Every, single, morning—do they have no shame…?!” Kaveh quietly ranted to himself, circles under his eyes from being deprived of sleep due to you both.
The door to Alhaitham’s room then emerged, revealing the ray of sunshine that blinded the entire house, and Kaveh at that as he winced slightly. You had a big stupid grin on your face, hair tousled, and your energy was just too big for this hour. A contrast to Kaveh’s deadpan.
“Good morning, Kaveh! Did you sleep good?” You cheerfully asked, literally skipping past him and to the fridge to probably see what can be cooked.
Kaveh narrowed his eyes. If he didn’t know you were just obliviously kind like this, he would’ve assumed you were mocking him.
“Don’t “morning” me. I didn’t even get a good nights rest because of you two! AGAIN.” He snapped, glaring at you.
You blinked in surprise before a sheepish look formed on your face, “Oh…I assume we were too loud?” You asked guiltily, tilting your head.
“YES. Has it ever occurred to either of you to soundproof your room at least? Find some way? I could barely focus on my projects because of it!” He ranted, close to grabbing your shoulders and shaking them out of exasperation. Though he couldn’t find it in himself to actually be furious with you when you sent him that sweet look in return.
Before you could respond in a very thoughtful and pitiful matter, Alhaitham’s voice broke in, announcing his arrival as he came out of his room, “If you’re so bothered by a married couple doing married couple stuff in their house, then move out. No one’s holding you back.” He suggested, moving past a glaring Kaveh to brew some coffee as if he didn’t just send an eviction threat to him.
You frowned, “Haitham! That was rude!” You then diverted your attention back to Kaveh and sent him the warmest smile that seemed to make even him dissolve every bit of anger he once carried, “I’m so sorry, Kaveh…! We’ll be more considerate of what we do together from now on, I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable!” And just when he thought it couldn’t get worse, you suddenly wrapped your arms around him and pulled him into a tight embrace, earning a grunt, “Our home is your home, okay?”
You then peeked your head up and looked over to Alhaitham with that never-fading smile, “Right, Haitham?!” You asked eagerly yet expectedly, tilting your head.
Alhaitham’s reply was blunt as he took a sip of his coffee.
“Maybe when you stop clinging to him.”
“Don’t be jealous! I’m just being nice!“
Kaveh just can’t fathom what you see in Alhaitham and how exactly he even fell for you—no offense…You were sweet, too sweet, but also too fond of…That man.
“I—!” Kaveh began, but when you stared up at him with that genuine, soft, and caring look in your eyes, he can only bring himself to sigh, slowly melting in your arms. He just can’t find himself to be mad at you after all.
Even when he’d be locked out of the house for not paying his rent on time, you were always there, somehow managing to convince Alhaitham to let him back in and give him more time or buying/making him food to give it to him in the mean time with a pitying look.
If anyone in Sumeru were told to guess who Alhaitham would be married to, they’d sooner guess a bookshelf than you of all people…At least you two seemed perfectly in love though! No toxicity or daily arguments there, especially with the way Alhaitham would stare at you when you were distracted.
You would have to be a fool to not know that was the look of love.
Although, Kaveh also knew you two were not gonna get any quieter, but it’s the thought—your thought to be precise—that counts.
Later that day, you decided to go out to a nearby café with Kaveh, Tighnari, and Cyno that opened in Sumeru’s streets, managing to persuade Alhaitham to come with so he can “socialize more” as you said to which Alhaitham blankly retorted back that he socializes just fine. Though of course, he ended up tagging along. Much to Kaveh’s annoyance.
Though what you certainly weren’t expecting was for two of your friends to not even know you and Alhaitham were married, both you and Kaveh having assumed they knew, giving the fact you wore a big fat diamond ring on your finger that could only be viewed as an engagement ring which also matched with Alhaitham’s. It really wasn’t hard to miss.
It was a simple outing. Though the café was a bit packed due to it just opening, you and Alhaitham having waited in a very long line while Kaveh, Cyno, and Tighnari sat, and were currently waiting for the beeper they were given to ring, signaling your drinks were ready.
You and Cyno were mostly the chatter of the group where you were rambling about a silly street dancer you had recently spotted with Alhaitham a few days ago while Cyno was just cracking the most unfunniest jokes known to man, Tighnari sending him the flattest expression the entire time. At least you laughed. Somehow.
“You really think that’s funny…?” Tighnari inquired in almost disbelief mixed with exasperation, raising a brow at you where you were having a fit of giggles over a joke Cyno made that was about the ocean “waving” to the beach that said hi.
You could only snicker, “Hehe! Yeah! It makes so much sense too, right? The ocean can’t talk, so it’s only sensible that it waves!” You explained cheerfully, a small rare smile forming on Cyno’s lips at the sound of someone genuinely enjoying his stupid jokes.
“If we’re going by that logic, then it still doesn’t make sense, because the beach can’t talk either, so how was it able to say hi?” Alhaitham quipped, dragging his gaze from his book to you.
“Don’t ruin it, Haitham! I know you too found it funny deep down!”
Alhaitham hummed, “Since you found it funny…” He mumbled, his arm finding its way around your shoulders on your chair as his gaze focused on his book again.
Kaveh can only mumble something incoherent, drinking the water he had brought while he waits for his drink, seemingly parched.
Tighnari furrowed his brows at the way Alhaitham got so close to you, his eyes—as quick as ever—not missing the way his thumb even stroked your knuckles as he held your hand, “I’ve noticed you two are…Rather close, huh? No offense, but you both don’t really seem like the type to get along so well.” He states, ears flicking in curiosity.
Kaveh snorted, “Close is an understatement…” He mumbled, earning a look from you as you knew full well what he was referring to while Tighnari merely sent a confused one.
You then laughed, diverting your attention back to Tighnari and Cyno as you leaned against Alhaitham’s fairly strong bicep, “None taken! We get told that a lot actually, but I kinda like it! It’s like opposites attract, right, Alhaitham?” You’d exclaim, your eyes sparkling with delight.
Alhaitham merely hummed, neither agreeing nor disagreeing, though it was obvious he was paying attention to everything you were saying nonetheless.
Tighnari can only squint his eyes at that. Opposites attract is quite the intimate phrase two friends would use to describe each other’s dynamic, “That’s certainly one way to describe it…You’re all full of life and Alhaitham’s just…” He trailed off, slowly turning to face said person.
That dreamy sigh that left you after saying that caused both Cyno and Tighnari’s heads to practically snap back towards you so fast, it was a miracle their necks didn’t break.
Kaveh merely stared at you as if you just publicly announced your love for a hilichurl, “Sometimes I wonder if he hypnotized you…” He mumbled, earning a jab to the knee from Alhaitham’s foot, causing him to yelp.
Cyno then chimed in after a long minute of looking between you two skeptically, “Huh…It’s just that people with opposite personalities like you two would usually be bickering nonstop.” He added, brows also furrowed.
“Oh, well…Alhaitham and I do argue sometimes, but not “nonstop” ! I think you might be mixing our relationship up with Alhaitham and Kaveh’s!” You suggested, your expression momentarily forming into a surprised one before it gradually shifted to a sheepish one.
But even after that, Cyno and Tighnari still couldn’t wrap their heads around this. The chatter continued on for a few more long minutes where you’d laugh at something that Alhaitham said (which he didn’t originally mean to sound funny), placing your palm over his hand, intertwining your fingers together in the process which Tighnari’s eyes instantly snapped to while Kaveh grumbled about the pastry menu’s prices.
While you, Alhaitham, and Kaveh were distracted, the forest ranger then turned to the general, “Psst…! Cyno, come here!” He whisper-yelled, ushering him over.
Cyno blinked and suddenly, obediently, scooted his chair an entire meter over, the loud screech it made causing Kaveh to wince and send him a bewildered look, “Closer?” He had the audacity to ask.
Tighnari grumbled, “You could’ve leaned.” He pulled Cyno around so their backs are only facing the other three as they huddled close in a totally not suspicious way in the middle of the café, “Their relationship is hard to cipher, right…?” Tighnari whispered to the other, voice low so neither you, Alhaitham, or Kaveh hear him.
Cyno nodded, “Agreed…The way they act…It’s both like they’re friends—like friends with benefits. Whatever they are, they must be very close and comfortable friends…” He murmured quietly, narrowing his eyes.
“Close and comfortable friends…?” Tighnari repeated in confusion, his brow arching.
Cyno stood his ground, “Yes. Close and comfortable friends. Do you see the way he lets them touch his shoulder without moving his entire body just to avoid their finger? The way he listens to their loudness without putting on his noise-cancellation like usual? He even held their hand. All of those are the complete opposite of what Alhaitham would do with anyone else.” Cyno explained, hand curling over his chin in thought, “Not to mention, I’ve noticed his hand has been on their knee for the past five minutes.”
Tighnari narrowed his eyes, glancing over his shoulder, and sure enough, Alhaitham’s hand was indeed on your knee, and you didn’t seem to have a care in the world, either not noticing or genuinely enjoying it.
He then hummed, turning back to Cyno, “I guess you’re right…I noticed he looks at them differently than how he looks at the rest too. His gaze, it…Visibly softens. Especially when he thinks no one’s looking. That’s nothing like Alhaitham either, he doesn’t easily let his guard down in public like that!” He commented, nodding in concur.
Cyno huffed, “That’s not true. He only does that when you and Kaveh are not looking. He doesn’t care when I stare, and neither do they.” He corrects. Very wrong by the way.
Tighnari deadpanned, ears flattening, “That’s entirely wrong. It’s either because they both just don’t care or because your way of paying attention to people is just staring dead at them, unblinking like a statue until you’re acknowledged like a cat yearning for attention.” The fox retorted.
“I like that comparison, and that’s only because it’s the most efficient method.”
“No. It’s not. It’s actually why people are scared of you until you crack your lazy jokes…”
Before they could bicker more, your giggle suddenly rang in the air, causing their heads to whip around their shoulders, only to see you leaning into Alhaitham, whispering something in his ear with a giggle, and if their eyes deceived them, Tighnari and Cyno could’ve sworn they saw Alhaitham—the ever-so cold and unreadable Acting Grand Sage himself—actually crack a smile.
Cyno whipped his head back to Tighnari when the two turned back around, “See? That’s enough to confirm the theory of them being friends with benefits. I was right.” He proudly declared quietly, though his expression showed no emotion other than his words. As usual.
Tighnari then huffed, “That doesn’t really mean anything, for all we know, they might be dating…We only have three possibilities right now. Friends with benefits, dating, or…” He suddenly trailed off, eyes slowly widening, and his ears perking up.
That grabbed Cyno’s attention as he leaned forward expectedly, “Or what?” He tilted his head, the two getting very close now.
Tighnari finally faced him, “Or maybe they’re something bigger. Something permanent.” He finally concluded, eyes wide.
That’s when they fell silent, minds racing and all.
“What if it’s an arranged partnership to fool the public?”
“Something planned out by the Akademiya?”
“Well since they, Alhaitham, and Kaveh all live in the same house, I also think it may be a love triangle too.” Tighnari blinked rapidly at that, “Either Alhaitham and Kaveh fighting over them,” Tighnari ran both hands down his face, “—or Kaveh and [your name] fighting over Al—”
Tighnari whacked him at that, sending him a glare, “Don’t finish that sentence! Right when I thought it couldn’t get worse…I thought it was obvious that the only thing that connects Alhaitham and Kaveh together is mutual suffering, and don’t even think about uttering that in-front of anyone!” He scolded, holding up a finger towards him even.
“They live in the same house. They’ve had to have done something altogether before, no? And it would be a good plot twist, [your name] has chemistry with both of them after all…”
“This isn’t a story, stop talking about them like they’re characters from a book!” Well.
Meanwhile, you and Kaveh were staring at them in concern, watching them go back and forth about God knows what, huddled together and everything.
“I wonder what they’re doing.” You hummed, tilting your head curiously with a more calmer look, compared to Kaveh’s very much concerned one.
He squinted, “They look like they’re plotting something…” He mumbles, holding the menu in his hands, “Also can someone check on the drinks?”
A question everyone was meaning to ask.
“That looks fun! Maybe we can do that together next time, Kaveh!”
Alhaitham then finally spoke up without diverting his gaze from his book, “Ignore them. Whatever conclusion they reach probably won’t be true.” He states bluntly.
…did you even notice those matching rings on their fingers?” Tighnari reminded Cyno in annoyance, clueless to Kaveh’s approaching figure.
“It could be a friendship ring.” Cyno shot back, also clueless.
Tighnari’s ears went back in frustration, “Wha—that doesn’t exist! Next you’re gonna say they kissed each other’s cheeks because that’s how strong their friendship is!” He argued.
“Friends kiss each other’s cheeks. I rest my case.”
“You didn’t rest ANYTHI—!”
Before Tighnari can explode, a shadow suddenly loomed over them.
“What in the Seven are you two doing…?” Kaveh’s voice broke in, eyes squinted in confusion, absolutely incredulous.
Cyno and Tighnari stiffened at that, Tighnari’s ears and Cyno’s imaginary ones—that he likely wished weren’t imaginary—perking as if they were caught stealing something.
Cyno then finally answered, facing him, “Debating on something.” Tighnari whipped his head towards him with a deadly glare, “You weren’t supposed to tell him!” He scolded.
Kaveh only grew more confused, “Debating what? What could you two possibly be debating?!” He asked once more, desperate for answers now.
“What their relationship is.”
Kaveh felt like he was about to flip something.
He then inhaled, “Archons save me…You’re telling me you two actually don’t know what they are?!” He ran his hands down his face in exasperation once more.
Tighnari tilted his head, “You know?” He inquired in surprise, his interest now piqued.
“Well, of course I know! I unfortunately live with them. How could I not know?!”
Cyno then chimed in, “Really? Then can you tell us whether or not our three hypotheses are corre—?” He was once again cut off.
“Your what?! Stop, stop, stop! I cannot believe this right now…How in the Dendro Archon’s name did you two miss it?! Like they’re not even subtle about it—they’re all over each other!” Kaveh ranted, moving his hands around in emphasis.
Cyno blinked, “All over each other? So they are friends with benefits…!” At that, Tighnari and Kaveh both spun their heads towards him with an irritated look.
“They’re nothing what you guys think! In fact, they’re actually a marr—” Before Kaveh can finally reveal the answer, a chair screeching back was suddenly heard, grabbing both their attentions.
Alhaitham had suddenly stood up, staring at the beeper which was flashing red and beeping nonstop, signaling their drinks are ready. Finally.
“Our drinks are ready. I’ll go get them.” As he said, Alhaitham placed his book in your lap for you to take care of which both Tighnari and Cyno’s eyes darted down to.
Alhaitham never, and I mean NEVER, leaves his book with just anyone…Just what were you two…?
You then suddenly perked up, sitting up in your seat, “Ooh, wait, Haitham! Don’t forget to add sugar in my drink, I forgot to tell them again!” You called out to him, waving for his attention.
Alhaitham sighed, “Of course you did…” He then leaned down to your height where your faces were close together, Cyno and Tighnari watching intently while Kaveh can only deadpan at the scene, and finally; your lips interlocked, a choked gasp leaving Tighnari at the sight, his ears shooting up.
At that, Alhaitham left, leaving you a giggling flushed mess, holding your cheeks in glee as you slumped back down in your seat, “Hehe! He’s such a great husband!” It was as if the world started spin when you uttered that one word.
“Husband! Husband…! Husband…”
The word echoed in Cyno and Tighnari’s minds just like that as they can only stare wide-eyed, Kaveh grumbling “Even in public, he has no shame.” as he turned to watch Alhaitham get their drinks.
“I-I’m sorry—what? What did you say…?” Tighnari asked for confirmation in bewilderment, leaning in.
You merely blinked innocently, “Hm? Husband? Wait, you two didn’t know we were married? I thought it was obvious!” You then showed them the wedding ring on your finger, the same one Tighnari was going on about was indeed a wedding ring.
Tighnari and Cyno can only stare at it in bafflement.
“Married.” Cyno repeated as if it were a new word.
“To Alhaitham…?” Tighnari added, tilting his head skeptically.
“…Willingly?” from Cyno, earning him a humorous snort from Kaveh.
You tilted your head, “Of course! I don’t get what’s so confusing. Alhaitham loves me, and I love him, even when he’s a little grumpy!” You exclaimed, your smile plastering right back on.
“Grumpy’s one way to put it.” Kaveh rose his brows, earning a little frown from you.
Before you could reply, Alhaitham was suddenly back with drinks, causing you to instantly crane your head back to face him with a happy grin, watching him place your drink first in-front of you, and place your straw with a precise amount of adjustment that he knew would please you and made Cyno and Tighnari watch in disbelief, “Here. Extra sugar just liked you asked.” He murmured, passing the rest their drinks. Kaveh was given his last though, much to his annoyance.
It doesn’t help that Alhaitham just tossed their straws towards them too.
“Thank you~!” You chirped.
Kaveh scoffed meanwhile, “Yeah, same. I’m soooooo grateful I was given my drink last and got my straw thrown in my face while they got their drink first and straw adjusted precisely.” He snapped, glaring at him.
Alhaitham didn’t even dare to apologize however and instead arched a brow at him, “You sound jealous, Kaveh. I wasn’t aware you wanted to join our marriage that badly, since the only way I’d ever do those things for you is if you were also my spouse.” He remarked tauntingly. Though Alhaitham’s expression was as blank and unreadable as ever, there was still a small hint of amusement playing on his face.
Kaveh recoiled however, “Eugh…I’d rather die! Stop saying stuff like that…The only thing I’d enjoy in a marriage with you two is [reader]! I’d rather fall in a ditch than ever get married to you though…” He shot back, trying to ignore that flattered look you sent him.
Like that wasn’t oddly intimate to say.
Alhaitham then looked up and finally noticed Cyno and Tighnari’s stares, “And what’s wrong with you two?” He inquired, finally sitting down next to you calmly as he took a sip from his coffee.
“You didn’t think to mention the fact you were married?” Tighnari asked somewhat sarcastically, sending Alhaitham an annoyed look.
Alhaitham didn’t blink, “I thought you both knew. It was pretty obvious.” He stated, moving to grab his book from your lap, “Not to mention, it was none of your business. Especially that whole debate you both had.”
As the conversation went on, Alhaitham’s hand found its way around yours once more, stroking your ring again while you cheerfully remained oblivious, too focused on your drink.
After all, being with Alhaitham made you forget all about your surroundings and feel at ease, protected, and delighted all at once. How you loved him so…!
Only you were able to get a genuine smile out of him.
Cyno then mumbled to himself, “Hm…In another universe maybe, they were friends with benefits and had a love triangle.” He quietly murmured to himself, nodding in thought while being clueless to the look Kaveh gave him.
i feel like this is kinda corny, but whatever cause alhaitham shares a bday with me
also the cafe they were all at is based off a cafe in tampa called qamaria, yemeni coffee co. (i love their matcha)
