Calamity

You watch him heading towards the door with enthusiasm, and again you're reminded of a small, excited child. You're honestly not sure whether to be amused or embarrassed, because this is the guy that's supposed to be protecting you. Still, the idea of an angel acting this ridiculous is pretty entertaining, and the idea of someone who believes in the stereotypical angel seeing this is even better.

"That depends," You start, staring him down with a very serious expression, "If you can get us where we need to go without a problem and be fucking helpful, then sure. But if you plan to take a detour to Liechtenstein or some shit like that, then you can forget about it." You really don't think you could take it right now if you trusted him to take you somewhere and he took you to an entirely different country instead. You're honestly just a little too stressed for something like that at the moment.

ereyes-312

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The Unforgiven III - Metallica

#GOOD MUSIC

> Get going already.

Oh, he moves and you’re left just kind of staring blankly. You can’t really accidentally copy him if he’s going to sit straight up, you’re standing, that would result in you on your ass somehow. Angels have wings, sure, but you can’t fucking fly. Physics. Come on, people.

“So let’s go,” you say emphatically, slipping around to the back of the chair he’s in to try and convince him to move, get up, come on, Karkat, work to do, chop chop, angel with a shotgun on your side. Maybe you don’t actually have a shotgun, but you’ve got an angel sword, and that’s pretty much ten times better. A shotgun isn’t much use for shit like the kind of thing Karkat hunts anyway. “I can poof us out there, ten seconds flat. It’d save time.”

Curiosity killed the cat, but impatience killed the holy being of Heaven that happened to be aligned with Earth.

"Ten seconds? You're getting bad at this." You stand to your feet, sighing heavily. He's like an impatient child. That's probably the best way to describe him on any given day, you think, and you're pretty sure a lot of people would agree with you there.

"Hold on a minute." You grab a gun off the desk, already loaded and ready for this hunt since you've attempted it so many nights before this one, and tuck it away for future use. After which you pick up the map of the city and hold it up so that Dave can see it.

"These are the places it attacked." You point to the red marks on the map. "So we know it's somewhere around this area, unless it's moving, but I don't think it is." Finishing your explanation, you hand the map over to him. "Now we're ready to go."

> Get going already.

Yes, Karkat, walking is really so fucking difficult that you feel the need to appear everywhere you go with a rustle of clothing and a breeze from absoshittinglutely nowhere, thank you very goddamn much. This all goes through your head fairly quickly and you catch yourself about to start mumbling it when Karkat continues and you settle for silence until he finishes, eyes searching the hunter’s face while he speaks. Hell yeah, you’ll help out, anything would beat this monotony.

“Why the fuck would it change and give us any kind of lead? Nah, the assmaggot’s prob’ly sucking all the shit it can out of that, what did you call it, teenage heartthrob attraction face it’s got going on. Some kind of fake vamp, or whatever.” You shrug and lean back like Karkat is doing, mirroring the human without intentionally doing so. “So what are we waiting on, you think I’m not in or something? Lame.”

You are so in. So in might as well be the letter n.

Thank fuck you didn’t say that out loud, that would have been embarrassing.

"Well, obviously." You roll your eyes. There is no 'probably' in this situation. "Shape-shifters aren't as stupid as some of the other things we hunt, and by now, the thing's got to know we're coming after it. It's not going to put its neck out for us." You uncross your arms and sit upright in your seat again. There's something about him doing the same thing as you that makes you want to do the exact opposite of that thing.

"We're not waiting for anything. I'm not, anyway. I've been fucking working, in case you haven't noticed." You make a motion towards the open books, laptop, and map of the city messily sprawled across the desk in front of you. "I can't do anything until we find this son of a bitch, so if you want to help out, it's time to get to work. I'm ready to get out of this shithole already."

> Get going already.

That seems easy enough. You pop up off of the motel bed you’ve been sitting on for the past way-too-long amount of time, getting to your feet and reappearing next to Karkat where he sits in the main room. Motels. You personally like them, maybe because there’s a decidedly human feel to the lack of sparkle and glitz that angels liked putting into things, but hey, you were never the best example of a holy being, were you?

“Hey,” you say simply, putting your chin on a hand with your elbow resting on the top of the chair you’ve decided to lean on as gracefully as you can manage with the way your jeans have taken to no longer staying as workable as you’d like.

You need new clothes — or, you want new clothes, that is; though you’ve never had to worry about getting them, what with your lack of guilt over nabbing certain things and accidentally destroying security cameras, there’s a charm in buying them. It builds character, or so you’ve been told. Illegal actions are so enticing, though.

“The shapeshifter case. You got it cracked?”

Keeping yourself busy recently has been no difficult task. Running around the city and checking every available resource you have for information on tracking down shape-shifters is very time-consuming. You can feel yourself getting more and more frustrated every time you check a source and fail to find anything you don't already know, which hasn't made you a very fun person to be around lately. You've just finished calling an old friend of yours when Dave pops up.

"Is walking really so fucking difficult?" You say, giving him a rather irritated glance. You don't give him a chance for a sarcastic response and speak again quickly. "I'm not any closer to knowing where this thing is than I was half a week ago. It's not in the sewers, as far as I can tell, and it doesn't change often enough for me to figure out where the damn thing is hiding."

You cross your arms and lean back in your seat, still looking just as pissed as when Dave first popped up next to you. "The best I can do is keep running around the general area I know it's at at night, unless you want to help out."

i was the one that got your lazy shitsucking self out of the motel i think i deserve to come

i call shotgun

YOU DESERVE NOTHING. YOU'RE LUCKY I EVEN LET YOU HUNT WITH ME.

NOW HURRY UP AND GET IN THE CAR SO WE CAN GO ALREADY.

i wouldnt say you would LET me

more like id just

sit there and not move until i got to drive it

ambiguity serves allcomers

OKAY, I'M LEAVING. YOU CAN STAY HERE, OR STAY IN THE CAR, OR WHAT EVER. BUT I'M GOING.

done

can i drive

WHAT DO YOU THINK, DAVE?

DO YOU THINK I'M GOING TO LET YOU DRIVE MY CAR?

IS THAT SOMETHING I'D NORMALLY DO?

i make no promises

UGH.

JUST GET IN THE CAR SO WE CAN GO.

ok i can roll with that

where are we going

THERE'S A DINER DOWN THE STREET.

WE CAN GO THERE IF IT'LL SHUT YOU UP.

vriska can take care of herself you should take me to look around places come on karkat

karkat

vantas

karkat

hunter boy

human person

homo

(sapiens)

lets go

FINE.

IF VRISKA GETS ANGRY LATER BECAUSE WE DIDN'T BRING HER, THEN YOU HAVE TO BE THE ONE TO EXPLAIN HOW YOU WERE TOO IMPATIENT TO WAIT ON HER.

carnaptioushunter replied to your post: karkats a sassmaster

DAMN RIGHT.

john would be proud if you knew him you dont though thats a shame hes got his hands full with his own heavenly duties and shit yo im looking through the fridge we got any food

NO, WE DON'T. IF YOU GO GET VRISKA, WE CAN GO SOMEWHERE AND GET SOMETHING. SOMETHING THAT ISN'T PIZZA.

huesofjadeharley

“Sometimes,” you reply solemnly. “Unfortunately, not many people take me seriously. Especially scientists. I think they have this weird theory that I might be mad.” You reach up to touch your ears for a moment before pulling them away.

“Have you ever regretted doing something, but didn’t at the same time, Karkat?” you ask out of the blue. “Because I think I have trouble weighing out the pros and cons of things.”

#carnaptioushunter #huesofjadeharley

You're about to say something in response to the first thing she says when she speaks again and you hesitate.

"Yeah." you say eventually, in a voice strangely quiet coming from you. Funny she should be the one to mention regretting something, but also not regretting it, to you.

aquify

#MOVIES

beauziful

supernaturalstuck more like

in which karkat is a hunter that gets a guardian angel that takes on his vessel’s name and life and more or less is a pain in karkat’s butt for the lengthy amount of time that they hunt things together

alternatively titled “that one au where dave is a fallen angel because he wants to be a Flawlessly Awesome human and ends up falling for karkat instead who has to teach him how to be human instead”

they have a demon friend named vriska that follows them on their adventures too and she whispers “gaaaaaaaay” at them until karkat shoves dave away and dave laughs

#loUD SHRIEKING NOISES #art #ooc #CaiTY IS ACTUALLY PERFEC TO OKAY?? OKAY

huesofjadeharley

Well that made absolutely nothing clearer. You were about to ask him if it was a little like a storm chaser, since they go around countries for hurricanes and tornadoes and stuff, but you’re sort of glad he didn’t let you because, in hindsight, that was really stupid. Storm chasing didn’t have anything to do with detectives!

You frown at his questions anyway, flicking your ear in annoyance. “I’m an artist,” you tell him. “I’d really like to be a scientist, though. Nuclear physics is something I absolutely adore!”

#carnaptioushunter #huesofjadeharley #Short reply. Gomen. \(u _ u )

Yes, that was a good choice in topics to change to. You decide to continue to roll with this subject until the problem presents itself again.

"If you want to be a scientist, what's stopping you?" You raise an eyebrow, propping your elbow against the table. "Art and science can go hand-in-hand sometimes."

motherfucker i will turn this car around dont you sass me