Hi! ⥠I'm Cassia, but usually everyone calls me Cass. I'm 17 and a Junior at Westwood and I'm just a girl trying to get by the high school years. Seems like the library was a good hide out after all.
Cassia was walking down to her house with Jayden and his adorable baby girl, Brenna. Jayden had been crying earlier, and clearly wasn't fine at all, and she wanted to make him forget about whatever was troubling him, especially since he wasn't ready to talk about it. Cassia, herself, was in a bad position, because of what she had witnessed the other day with her family, and feeling a stab of pain after her conversation with Chris. But she couldn't help it: the girl would put everyone else before herself, otherwise she would feel guilty. And to be honest, she was in denial; she hadn't accepted the fact that she needed to stop worrying over people and to start caring for herself for once.Â
As she walked down with the pair, she couldn't help but smile and laugh: they were so adorable together, and Cassia was reminded of Lola, instantly. Lola was the little girl she babysat a few times a week. Her mother was a make-up artist, who worked on the set of well-known movies, and they lived in the upper class area. Unfortunately, Lola's father had passed away when she was just a baby, and she still doesn't understand that he's gone. Her mother always reassured her that he was coming home when she asked where he was. It made Cassia feel guilty, and a little mad, but she could understand why.
Reaching her house, she unlocked the door and led the two inside. ''This is...my house...'' It was in that moment when she realised it didn't feel like a ''home'' any more, and the knot in her stomach tightened. She didn't know who was home and who wasn't, so she was hoping there were no awkward encounters with her family. Smiling and shutting the door behind them, she put her coat over the banister. ''Sorry...it's not much but it's all we got. Anyways, the kitchen is this way.'' Gesturing in front of her, she walked into the kitchen and tied up her long, chestnut hair, leaving her side bangs out. Pulling on an apron, she smiled and handed one to Jayden, and then cooed at Brenna. ''Who's gonna make some cookies?''
I babysit this girl called Lola, and she loves cookies and I bake them for her every now and then...would you like to help me? It'll take your mind off of things. [smiles] You don't have to...
[opens her bag and hands him a fresh tissue] Forgive me for listening, but by the sound of your conversation, I donât think you are. [gives him a warm smile to reassure him] Wanna get some air?
[opens her bag and hands him a fresh tissue] Forgive me for listening, but by the sound of your conversation, I don't think you are. [gives him a warm smile to reassure him] Wanna get some air?
[talking on the phone] NoâŚ.no, stop! Look, you have absolutely no right to call me and tell me that youâre âsorryâ because you and I both know you arenâtâŚyou hurt Mom and now youâre paying for itâŚ.wâHey, donât you EVER bring Kayla into thisâŚ. You know whatâŚ.Goodbye [hangs up, barely holding onto his composure]
Hey...that's not a bad idea. What do you say, Lo? [looks up and laughs as Lola claps her hands excitedly] [looks back at him and smiles] Would you like to come?
I don't know. I think one has to ask Lola. [chuckles]
Honestly: we played dress-up, watched Tangled, made brownies, went to the park and played hide and seek, and she's still not tired. I'm starting to think she's had some sort of Go Go Juice.
Jake was - undeniably - a total homebody. It wasnât that she didnât have friends - even though, really, she didnât; she had a girlfriend in Delaney, but they actually tended to spend most of their time at each otherâs houses. Which, for Jake, was a total relief, because it meant she was allowed to actually enjoy herself and the blondeâs presence without being worried about Delaney worrying about being watched, or stared at or whatever. Outside of that, she had Addison; but after sheâd - rather accidentally - torn him apart the other night, their relationship was still tentative. He seemed to have forgiven her, but she was still walking on eggshells and she knew it; she deserved a probation period, anyway. Sheâd probably scared the absolute hell out of him, and she was sort of angry with herself for it. Then again, Jake was almost always angry at one or another. There were other people, too; Jaycee, even Ellie - though that was a considerably more âfrenemiesâ type deal than anything else, and neither of them were likely to give her a reason to leave her house. Admittedly, a big part of the reason sheâd been locked up at home was because having a kitten was a lot like having a baby - she felt bad leaving Tiny alone for necessary thing like school, let alone going out to do stuff she didnât really want to do.
Sheâd decided, today, that she was actually going to do something besides soccer practice, school or the grocery store, and went to the park with her textbooks with the intent of studying in the sun. Sheâd settled at a park table a little ways away from the actual playground, and had glanced up once when she saw Cassia come on. She knew the other girl wasnât likely to approach her, or anything, but it had kind of thrown her for a minute when she saw the other with a kid. She hadnât known Cassia was a mom - but then again, Jake didnât actually pay a lot of attention to anyone she didnât need to; it wasnât like Cassia was a threat to her - or like, anyone - in anyway, so Jake had simply gone back to her chem packet, glancing up another few times as the pair played on the playground, if only out of interest.
She wasnât watching them necessarily, but they were cute, both of them, and it made Jake smile to watch them interact - and ice cream was sort of an awesome idea, actually. She was trying to actually attach to real life, right - why not? So she packed up her notes, putting them in her bag and pulling out her wallet as she walked over the ice cream stand just in time for Cassia to drop her cash. âOh, shit,â she let out softly, then caught herself, offering the little girl a smile and pressing a finger to her lips in an effort of âdonât repeat thatâ while she bent to help Cassia collect her change. It was really obvious that the girl barely had enough for one ice cream, let alone two, as Jake held the cash out to her, and the redhead cleared her throat and straightened up, opening her own wallet. âHere, my treat,â she offered, and without giving Cassia time to argue, turned to the man. âIâll pay for whatever she got - Cass, what did you want? And Iâll have one scoop of vanilla, please,â she couldnât actually remember the last time sheâd let herself have ice cream, and thought this was a solid excuse if one was ever going to present itself.
Cassia tried to pick up all the coins as quickly as she could. Even Lola tried to help her, which was the cutest thing. When Lola gave her the coins she picked up, Cass put it in her purse and picked her up in her arms, kissing her head, grinning as the little girl started to laugh. ''Cutie!'' She cooed, poking her cheek. Cass let Lola go, trying to get the rest of the coins. That was when she was the waterfall of red hair appeared into her vision, and looking up, she saw that it was Jake helping her. Cassia was a little surprised: she knew Jake, but was surprised she even remembered her name. Cassia was pretty much a nobody at school, just a harmless Wordie. No one really knew much about her or even talked to her. She just got on with her own business.
Before Cassia could thank Jake, she was taken a little aback when Jake told the man behind the ice-cream cart that she'd pay for whatever she and Lola wanted. Of course Cass was going to reject and say it was fine, though in reality she could barely afford one for Lola. It was just in her nature to feel guilty if someone else had offered or paid for something that was hers or something that she wanted, though she tried so hard to provide for her own family. But, knowing that she couldn't get past Jake, Cassia gave in. ''Uh...Ch-chocolate...chocolate would be great...''
As the man handed out their ice-creams, Cassia handed one of the vanilla's to Lola, and held her own chocolate ice-cream. She looked at it, still a little surprised. She just wasn't used to someone acting so kind towards her. Smiling, she turned to Jake. ''Hey...thanks, for that. You really didn't have to, you know.'' Cass looked down at Lola, who was happily licking and eating her ice-cream, holding her hand. She looked down at Lola and asked gently. ''Lola, what do we say?'' and with that, the little girl had given Jake an energetic thank you in return. She giggled and looked at Jake. ''She really appreciates it. As do I.''
Jericho: Cass, where are you? I can't find you anywhere...just let me know if you're safe.
Jericho: Cass, I want to talk.
Jericho: I want to talk about everything that's happened this week. I want to do it in person though. Please. I'm waiting at the park if you finally decide on coming.
After another exciting day with Lola, the little girl she babysat, Cassia came home. She was tired, but in the way that she wasn't exhausted and wanted to fall asleep: she couldn't stop smiling and just needed a breather. She started walking home, confused when her brother wasn't picking up his phone. Jericho had always said to call him if she needed a ride home, and she did get anxious when walking out in the dark. Cass figured her parents would be at work, so didn't try calling them either.Â
When she turned the key in the lock, the first thing she could hear was silence. It had caught her by surprise, considering that for the past few days the house was filled with empty words and a river of tears. For some reason, her father and Jericho kept arguing nowadays, and no one was telling her what about. Asher and Rei was always scared when either of them walked in the room and her mother looked depressed. Cassia knew how much her mother has gone through. It was hard to raise her older brother, since his biological father and dumped her and left after he had found out she was pregnant. Her parents even abandoned her because of their strict Christian beliefs, and thought their daughter had sinned. The silence was deafening.
Creeping in and locking the door, Cassia, placed her bag down on the floor and threw her coat on the banister. Every second she counted she was waiting for the moment to when someone would come out and scream accusations across the room. Her heart drummed a little faster, a shiver ran down her spine, her palms turned sweaty. Then everything froze. The silence was too good to be true.
''Oh, so this was supposed to make it better, was it?'' The sarcastic tone had come from the living room. This room was the biggest in the house, and it honestly wasn't big at all. But it could held just the entire family. The voice had belonged to her father, and kneeling down behind the door, Cassia peered in and watched the scene: her father and Jericho were standing close in front of each other, and out of the corner of her eye, behind the door, Cassia could see her mother. She was a beautiful woman, even with the bags under her eyes and her messy hair, from her lack of sleep and crying. She sniffed as Jericho started to shout.
''What was I supposed to do?!'' Jericho huffed, his chest rising and falling rapidly. She never saw her brother so angry before in her life. It was only when the subject of how different he looked from Cassia and the twins did he get a little angry, but not like now. It almost freaked her out. Who was he? ''I couldn't say no. Not when all that was running in my head was how much it could benefi-''
''Benefit us how?! Huh? Answer me that!'' Cassia' father snapped, his fists clenched, and her mother suddenly got up. She guessed that her mother had also spotted when Cassia's eyes were studying, and tried her best to stop it. But her attempt of calming her father down was no use: he only ignored her and her attempts ended in vain. Tears fell down her soft cheeks, but she only tried to hide it was a vacant expression.
''Oh, right, I get it now.'' Jericho headed towards the end of the room and picked up a black, battered bag that was hiding in the corner. All of their eyebrows were raised; Cassia had never seen that bag in the corner, and she guessed that her parents hadn't either. ''I'm just not good enough, aren't I? Every day, I work my ass off just so we can live here, just so all of you can eat. I, quite frankly, stopped giving a shit about myself ages ago, just so all of you can be happy. That's still not enough, is it?'' By now, Jericho had tears in his eyes and his voice was hoarse. As he swallowed hard, Cassia closed her eyes and whispered, hoping he'd hear but knew it was no use. No, that's not true...don't think like that Jericho...p-please..
''And where the hell do you think you're going?'' Again, her father's words were serious, and it had only made her heart ache even more. Cassia was suddenly starting to realise what Jericho wanted to do, and she was wondering how long he had been planning all this. Was it partly her fault? She always made sure everyone was okay...maybe she forgot about the person who she cared for the most...
But Jericho only glared at their father and started making his way towards the door. Cassia felt the need to hide, so she crept onto the stairs and quickly as she could without making a sound. Kneeling down, she watched as he reached for the door handle. Her heart stopped. Her blood went cold. He couldn't...
''Jericho. You are not leaving this house.'' Her father's eyes were stern, his hand was gripped onto her older brother's wrist. As he closed his eyes for a brief second, he continued. ''You are going to step away from this door. I am your father, you will listen to me and do as I sa-.''
Jericho turned around. ''You. Are. Not. My. Father.'' If you had slapped her across the face, it wouldn't have hurt Cassia any more than those five words had done. Her father's eyes went wide. He lost his grip on Jericho's wrist. Jericho's body went stiff. Her mother dropped the box of tissues that were in her hands. And though she didn't turn around, she could feel Asher and Rei behind her, about to say something but had caught their words in their mouth.
Cassia walked in front of them all, and she could feel Jericho's eyes on her. She could feel the waves of guilt surrounding him, choking him, but she felt nothing. She was numb from the pain her own family had given her, the people who she would die for in a heart-beat.
''I-I hope...I-I hope you're happy...I hope you're ALL happy...w-with what you've done to e-each other...'' It was the only words she could say before she felt herself shaking, crying, screaming internally. She wanted to hit something and yet she wanted to do nothing. She wanted to lay there and do nothing. She didn't want to breathe anything at all.
''Cassia, wait!'' Her brother tried to stop her, holding her wrist like her father had done to him. Her parents were still in shock, that she had heard and seen everything, and that Jericho had said those five words. He had never felt left out in the family, because his biological father was just a sperm donor, in his eyes.Â
Without looking back, Cassia said firmly. ''Let. Go.'' Jericho, for once in days, obeyed. Opening the door, she ran out and slammed the door shut. No one had run after her, no one had tried to comfort her. It was like an endless cycle: she tried to fix everyone's problems yet nobody cared for hers. It was like she was a puppet with a few strings left...
Breathing in the night air, she ran all the way to the nearest cafe, her hoodie covering her face. As she sat down at the back, sobbing into the wall, she continued to breathe. It was no use; her lungs were burning.Â
