Don't Fall For A Killer

Cas Oswald Really fucking old

[cassiobites]

M!A: Your character can only tell the truth.

Oh sh–No, I’m not cut out for this. What if people find out I know the entire Love, Actually script by heart? That would be bad. Or worse, what if I tell them how many people I’ve killed? It was a lot, I’ve definitely lost count. Shit, I shouldn’t be saying this.

[faith-hunter-ltd]

I’m calm. I’m breathing. I’m definitely going to kill them. Calmly.

[cassiobites]

That sounds inadvisable. Spontaneous rage is easy to argue in court, but calmly planned murder is generally frowned upon. Why am I helping you? Don’t murder people, kids.

[cassiobites]

amara-zhang :

“How modern of you.” At his words she admittedly felt an unwanted twinge. Amara lived her life under the rule that she would never feel obligation to anyone other than herself. She owed him nothing. Still… “Never doubt me. I’m sure you’ve spent your centuries well though, haven’t you? Even if you were battling your doubt,” she smiled as if she hadn’t known exactly how he had been over the centuries. Amara may have been entirely aloof but she still cared. She knew when he fell in with Vivian, and she knew when he fell out and now even without this god-awful spell, he was still very human. “Mm, is that all? I suppose there is some sort of charm in it all I’m yet to find it but well, I’m glad that you’re glad.”

“I guess I’m a modern guy. You’re just lucky Amara is timeless.” And lucky he’d gone soft and happy in his new Havensdale life, or she’d have to face up to his anger. “Of course I have. You know me, there’s nothing like a good time.” Small talk wasn’t a good look on them, especially when his words all sounded like sarcasm and she refused to feel guilt for anything. “Don’t worry, you’ll get there someday. I hear there’s nothing quite like the allure of a summer carnival. What do they call it? The Founders Fair, or something like that. Not that a fair would be your sort of thing, of course.”

[cassiobites]

gofor-faye :

“Oh, I think I could. Well duh I didn’t like that colour, it was the ugliest colour I’d ever seen. Were you just not listening? I- Yes nevermind, this is so not the point. And he’s funny, how interesting. You don’t own a vast number of Hawaiian shirts too, do you? I want your real opinion because I’m looking for real votes. Not from you personally obviously but from my peers which are, incidentally, the same ones who come here and ask to know about beet juice. Neither? Ugh, could this day be anymore stressful? Protein powder sounds scary, I don’t want to scare people. You shouldn’t have to but yes, you can. It’s for prom.”

“I’m trying to keep up, but you say a lot of words.” He gave a slightly bewildered shrug. “I try not to be funny, but it just keeps happening anyway. Uh....No? That’s the kind with the birds and trees on it, right? Wouldn’t be caught dead in one; this isn’t a nineteen seventies bowling club. Your peers sound really fun. They are really fun. I mean, probably? I can think of at least fifteen things that are more stressful than that, and I’m not even trying that hard. It’s basically energy in powder form, it’s not that scary. But....fine, why don’t you just go for the typical ‘all natural, gluten and dairy free, vegan, non-fat, zer-cal sweetener’ routine you high schoolers seem so fond of these days. Oh, right, prom.” How very modern. “You’re probably a shoe-in for queen, right?” She had the perfect hair and fancy shoes of a girl who’d sell her soul to win.

[cassiobites]

carmicsword :

“Tasted fine,” she said almost pleasantly but that was sorta counteracted by the way she’d slammed the empty smoothie cup down on the counter. The accompanying stare wasn’t very pleasant at all. Carmen never forgot the ones that got away- it was a short list. Was she still bitter about it? Definitely. “I see you’re still alive.”

Oh shit. It was hard to look intimidating and unconcerned while wearing a stupid company shirt and an apron, but he tried anyway. “Could you tell your face that?” She could’ve been pretty if she wasn’t so goddamn terrifying. Not that terrifying women had ever bothered him before. Maybe it was the fact that she’d tried to kill him. “I see you still like scaring innocent people while they try to go about their lives.” He was safe behind the counter because she was a customer and she wasn’t allowed back there. (Foolish reasoning, but it was the only thing keeping him from taking off and probably losing his job. Thanks constant, crushing fear of everything). Being human sucked.

[cassiobites]

miss-molly-v :

“In theory, it’s fine. I mean, I don’t have anywhere explicit to be, so I can wait. It’s just annoying, you know. A muffin would be lovely. I’m partial to lemon poppyseed if that’s an option. If not, anything that doesn’t have chocolate would be great. I don’t have a huge sweet tooth. Call me crazy, but cavities are so not my jam. Oooh. Thank you. I like you.”

“Well, in theory you might be the most understanding customer I’ve had all day. Something about sweating out all the electrolytes in their bodies makes people a bit grumpy. Really? You’re in luck, nobody else in this town seems to like lemon poppyseed, so we have a ton of them. Here you go.” He hands her the muffin with a smile. “That’s not crazy, cavities mean dentists, and dentists...Ugh. Nobody’s getting near my teeth. But--and I only ask because I’m supposed to take constructive criticism, please fill out a comment card, blah blah blah--what would your opinion on dark chocolate on the menu? It’s a little more...bitter, I guess.”

[cassiobites]

sylvie-dupont :

“No. It’s fine. It’ll be fine. I’ll survive.” {sniffs at the drink a little bit dubiously} “Beet juice? Really? That’s so…quaint. It looks a little bit bloody. Not exactly the most appealing, is it? Ah well. Beggars can’t be choosers, I guess.”

“Maybe. Probably. I mean, yes, you absolutely will survive, none of our food will kill you, and my boss would be very unhappy to learn that I was spreading the idea that it might. He’s funny like that. Yep, it--yeah, it kind of does look like blood. Very unappealing. Yuck. Everybody hates blood, right? Gross. I feel like that saying doesn’t apply to people who paid for food and then aren’t happy with the color of it? I could get you another one, with no beets and double another fruit if you wanted. Bananas, maybe?”

[cassiobites]

miss-molly-v :

“Well, I’d need my drink to be able to complain about it. I hate to be a totally beeyotch about it, really, but I’ve been waiting for almost ten minutes, and I do have places to go and all that…So yes. And the color’s not a problem. Beet juice is fine. Back at…Well, I’m used to green smoothies, so this should be just fine. I won’t say no to the stamp card, though.”

“Right, sorry, your drink. Of course. Do you want a muffin to make up for the wait? No charge. Am I allowed to do that here?” He asks no one in particular. “Who cares, have a muffin. Nobody’s paying attention anyway. And here’s your drink, plus the stamp card. Next time we’ll be faster, I think the recipe change might be throwing people.”

[cassiobites]

joeysalvatored :

“All of that? Spot on. Really man, employee of the month but you gotta really emphasise that you don’t know why because your boss is an asshole. Or whatever way you wanna word it. Just keep on dragging that good Salvatore name through the dirt at any and every opportunity. I can’t carry all the weight here. But uh, speaking of—” very subtlety, Joey pulled out his own full stamp card and handed it over ever incognito, “I’ll have whatever you recommend, Cas.”

“Ah--shit, I didn’t mean it like that. I should put up a sign or something that tells everyone your family shouldn’t be held responsible. Like those liability wavers they have when you go skydiving. Or take your kids to daycare. I think you might have to, sorry man. I don’t think I have time to work and trashtalk the good Salvatore name, there’s not enough time to fully commit to either task. You got it.” Cas took the stamp card with a smile and punched in the order. “Hey, we’re coming up with puny menu names for--I actually don’t know why, it just gets kind of slow in the afternoons around here, I guess. Again, not complaining, just an observation. Anyway, we’re down to Custards Last Stand for a new smoothie, and Catcher in the Rye for a sandwich on, you know, rye bread. Thoughts?”

[cassiobites]

gofor-faye :

“Well, thank you ever so much for all of that entirely pointless information if not unwarranted but the last smoothie I had here was the ugliest colour ever. I don’t even think it was a colour. Anyway, not the point. I need your near-juice experience. What do you people like better? Wheat grass or kale? Both I feel are entirely controversial and I cannot afford to make mistakes. … No pressure or anything.”

“You’re welcome? It was a fair guess that you wanted to hear it all, you wouldn’t believe how many have today. You aren’t--well, everything has a color, it’s just...maybe you didn’t like the color. Never mind. Advice I can give. But it costs extra. Kidding. Uh...do you want my real opinion, or my I work here and technically have to sell the food to people opinion? Because neither. You can’t mask the taste of a wheat grass shot, no matter what people tell you. Protein powder is probably a better choice. Can I ask why this is so important?”

[cassiobites]

sweet--salvatore :

“You had a lot of people complaining?” Keith laughed a little and took a seat at the counter, his hands raised. “Don’t worry, I’m just waiting on my dad to drive me home, but I’ll take a Monkey Business while I wait. Can you put it on my dad’s account? You know, Joseph Salvatore? If people are causing too much trouble for you, I can talk to him about the beet juice. Maybe include it as an option, rather than a necessity.”

“Just a few, mostly snobby townies and the like.” He nodded and punched in the order. “That should be out in a minute or two, we’re not exactly busy right now.” Cas visibly pales, because he might not have been human in a long time, but he still knows how much trouble he could get in if the owner’s son starts saying he’s been badmouthing the place. “Absolutely, on your dad’s tab it goes. And uh, I wasn’t complaining about the beet juice, just commenting, really. It wasn’t even constructive criticism. You don’t have to say anything to him about this conversation.”

[cassiobites]

amara-zhang :

“Cassio…,“ how terribly inconvenient. At least right now while she was like this… Still, she smiled and let out a breath. Human or not, when had Amara Zhang ever missed a beat? Besides, her humanity had always been on and what was one old flame in the grand scheme of things? "Entirely subjective and yet here we both are just like I said, my love. Although admittedly I didn’t expect that you would choose to settle down here of all places.”

“It’s Cas now,” He told her, briefly wondering if she could sense that he wasn’t as vampiric as usual. “I was starting to think it was never going to happen, but that’s what I get for doubting you.” Starting was a bit of an overstatement. He’d never really given up, but the signs hadn’t exactly pointed to a happy ending. “I guess something about the town just....caught my eye. Turns out I really like trees.” And pretty blonde girls with almost two decades worth of pent-up frustration. “I’m more surprised that you ended up here. You’re classy, the town is quaint...But whatever, I’m glad.”

[cassiobites]

shiningstar-wendy :

“I don’t care if you just ring them up, this smoothie didn’t have beet juice in it last week, so I shouldn’t have to drink it now. Do you even care what this does to my digestive system? Sometimes this is all I have time for in the morning and I shouldn’t have to sit through my report with an irritated stomach.” Wendy sighed loudly, but smiled, one hand on her hip as the other indicated the drink. “Look, I’m a reasonable woman, but I can’t drink this. I need you to be a darling and get whoever does make these drinks to make me another without the beet juice. Tell them who I am if you have to. I can wait.”

“It’s a color thing, you know? Save your insides from the harsh chemicals in traditional dye, I think. Personally I’d think beet juice was better than red dye number three, but the customer is always right. Of course not, let’s get that fixed right away.” He rolled his eyes the moment he turned away to fix her drink, but kept a smile plastered on every time he looked at her. He didn’t want to get fired, really. He just sometimes couldn’t stop himself from saying things he shouldn’t “Alright, if you think that would help. What’s your name?” Like pretending he didn’t know the woman who was likely the most famous person in Havensdale.

[cassiobites]

h8-u-5ava :

“Hey, come on. Stop harassing the employees. If you hate the beet juice that much, use your words and politely ask for it to be made without it. Any complaints beyond that can be directed to the manager of The Juice Box or the owner of the gym. We good? Okay, good.” She smiled at Cas before her eyes began scanning the room, “Cas, do you know if I left my bag here earlier?”

“My hero. I should get one of those panic buttons to put under the counter that rings directly to you. Anytime we get rude customers, you can come beat them up with your karate skills.” He shrugged, kicking the lost-and-found box out from behind the cleaning supplies and glancing in. “Uh, there’s a couple in here, but somehow I don’t think you’re the owner of the lime green messenger bag or the hot purple plaid backpack. Oh--here we go.” He handed her the bag before pausing and blinking at her. “You look really nice. Not that that’s a surprise, I just usually see you in yoga pants. I like it...it’s a good look.”

[cassiobites]

“It took a little longer than I thought it would, but I guess we ended up in the same place after all. Someday becomes pretty subjective when you live forever, huh?”

@amara-zhang

[cassiobites]

“If you’re here to complain about a drink I can offer my apologies, but please remember that I just ring them up, I don’t make them. Is it the color? It’s the color, isn’t it. We’ve started adding beet juice to all the smoothies--yes we do have a sign about it, yes it is listed under ingredients, no I don’t know why. I can give you a stamp card to make up for the trouble, though?”

[men-men-everywhere]

Alden Ehrenreich