Ava Montgomery

Nineteen Part-Time Karate Instructor Human Sister of Benjy, Faye, and Elena.

[h8-u-5ava]

Text || Sexy Bexy 💗🏐

Becs: Oh no, that's so bad, who gets reckt at a family dinner????

Becs: do u think it's about the fiance???

Becs: I promise we'll have a better celebration ASAP when you've escaped ok, i've got cake in the fridge + a bunch of cheesy netflix movies saved to my list and i know you have booze somewhere

Becs: mad bc Elena's drunk?? if someone starts crying pls take video 4 me🤣🤣

Ava: ME usually????

Ava: Like gurl don't turn me into the good daughter, I've worked hard for this bish

Ava: ???? Maybe idk she brought Isaiah Jennings here?? or maybe he brought her???

Ava: That sounds lajkhdf

Ava: Oh ym god

Ava: nsjkgb;gfksbkfjb

Ava: Fyes comin @ ym mom

[h8-u-5ava]

[ quietly humming the Happy Birthday song to herself as she picks her fork back up. ] Does this make me the favourite now?

Yo! Ms Chardonnay! Can you pass the garlic potatoes? I-... [ A flicker of concern? A fading smile? A softer tone? ] Elena?

@http://gofor-faye.tumblr.com/post/173013422596/

[h8-u-5ava]

[ legit just grabbing Andy’s arm dramatically like binch did you know about this? ] I’ve never loved either of my sisters more than in this exact moment.

@http://gofor-faye.tumblr.com/post/173012037326/

[h8-u-5ava]

[ abruptly drops her fork and coughs cause she choked on a sautéed potato. ] Where is my phone? I need to text Becs. Or film this.

@the first line of http://gofor-faye.tumblr.com/post/173008757511/

[h8-u-5ava]

Fuck me. The only way they’re getting me to the vacation home alive is if Elena stays this hammered.

@http://gofor-faye.tumblr.com/post/173000843021/

[h8-u-5ava]

rbecsj :

“I don’t–I don’t want to know what hella will means. Can’t you just google a really great recipe and make some for me? I’m already set for life with you, this will seal the deal.” She smiled back, but quickly realized she was misreading the situation as Ava’s turned into more of a smirk. “Ava! God, your life is interesting enough, don’t try that. I really want to ask for more details, but I’m also scared to know. Do you think you can keep it PG-13 if I work up the courage?”

“That came out scarier than I meant it. I mean someone who is a hella person might respond. Not someone will hella respond.” Ava laughed as she continued, “Unless you want the beef to be marinaded in red wine, I suggest you find someone else.” Again, she laughed, her smirk falling into a lopsided smile as her tongue stuck out. “Uh... I can promise to try.” She offered, “But like, it’s really nothing major or serious, I’m just... having fun.”

[h8-u-5ava]

Text || Sexy Bexy 💗🏐

Becs: ?????

Becs: Deets, man

Becs: Have punches been thrown yet?👀👀

Ava: Elena's DRUNK

Ava: Like verging on #RECKT drunk

Ava: It's so fucking hard to keep a straight face

Ava: Happy late birthday to me 🎂🎂🎂

Ava: My mom is so mad #blessed

[h8-u-5ava]

faith-hunter-ltd :

I’m calm. I’m breathing. I’m definitely going to kill them. Calmly.

Pretty sure the last thing this town needs is a murder.

[h8-u-5ava]

rbecsj :

“Somebody cut in front of me in line at the canteen today, and by the time I got to the register they were all out of lasagna. Now I either have to learn how to make lasagna or find someone to make it for me. Does a girl looking for someone to help her fill the hole in her stomach sound okay for a Craigslist ad?”

“I say go for it. Either no one will respond, or someone hella will and you’ll be set for life; start of a fairy tale, I’m sure.” She paused for a moment before a slight, little smirk tugged on her lips. “Probably quite unlike what I’ve been doing, but still, your Craigslist ad would likely be more interesting.” 

[h8-u-5ava]

Text || Sexy Bexy 💗🏐

Ava: Brah

Ava: You will not believe what is happening at this dinner

Ava: I'm legit dying 😂😂

[h8-u-5ava]

So... how are we all? Having a good time? Is it just me or is this Chardonnay really good? I mean, it’s no Merlot, but damn. Can you pass the parsnips, please?

[ @ these guys ]

[h8-u-5ava]

danny-mcr :

I appreciate the offer but I think you’re right. Unless it’s recreational screaming, it probably doesn’t belong at the lady of the hour’s welcome back bash, y’know? —And I totally just said the words “recreational screaming”. Wow. Let’s make that two drinks, yeah? [ laughs while making them up some alcohols ] More than likely but hey, this isn’t prom. It’ll be no more than two at a time I’m sure. Myeah, these might be a teeny tiny bit strong but… Cheers?

Nothing wrong with a little bit of recreational screaming, Danny. Maybe wouldn’t have used those words, but this is a classy shindig, so probably best to keep it clean. [ Also laughs, but JesusFuckingChrist why are they talking about screaming recreationally? And why is that now all she can think about? And how good he looks in that shirt? Damn Daniel. ] Yes. Two. Three even, if you’re feeling crazy. Every two drinks needs at least one shot, it’s like a rule. [ more laughing ] I’m sure he’s being very respectful over there talking to your mom. Strong is good. Cheers! [ le clink ] Seriously though, next party here you gotta get a hot tub. This yard is too big to not have a hot tub.

[h8-u-5ava]

cassiobites :

“If you’re here to complain about a drink I can offer my apologies, but please remember that I just ring them up, I don’t make them. Is it the color? It’s the color, isn’t it. We’ve started adding beet juice to all the smoothies–yes we do have a sign about it, yes it is listed under ingredients, no I don’t know why. I can give you a stamp card to make up for the trouble, though?”

“Hey, come on. Stop harassing the employees. If you hate the beet juice that much, use your words and politely ask for it to be made without it. Any complaints beyond that can be directed to the manager of The Juice Box or the owner of the gym. We good? Okay, good.” She smiled at Cas before her eyes began scanning the room, “Cas, do you know if I left my bag here earlier?”

[h8-u-5ava]

theinfamous-louis :

I don’t know if I’m smiling from sleep deprivation or for my business plans being finalized.

Are you actually aware of how dull you are, or is this a genuine persona you’ve got going on?

[h8-u-5ava]

hellsfavourite-angel :

Yeah, no. You can take this shit back immediately. Do I look like I’m interested in your prom campaign? Or… Whatever the fuck you’re doing. I’m not.

Honestly, can you believe these assholes?

I swear, if I see one more prom-related food product...

[h8-u-5ava]

marklost-intime :

I–I was trying to buy some peppermint tea and I started crying. Don’t look at me, I think I already scared the cashier… I’m fine? I’m more than fine, really now, but I’m— I can’t stop crying?

Mark? Okay. Okay yeah, you’re fine. I’m fine. We’re all fine. You want a tissue? Or five? I have a whole pack in my bag. Which I realise sounds either practical or crazy and I’m hoping you’re going to assume the former.

[h8-u-5ava]

yvonnedelisle :

If you’re not voting for Faye, I need you to line up. I just want to chat. One on one. I’d like to understand, that’s just the kind of patient soul I am.

Christ, I’m going to need more wine if this whole family are going to be taken over by this ridiculous campaign. I couldn’t even get to the milk this morning because of all the damn commotion with the bloody cupcakes.