What are you doing here omg

HI. I'm Jordan. I'm skilled at being inept and also at being socially awkward. Actually, all kinds of awkward. I'm twenty-two, my favourite color is blue and this is my blog.

[mcdolans]

ha?

every single person who reblogs this

every

single

person

will get “doot doot” in their ask box

[semememes-blog]

HOW

[lexiwestiiee]

I WANT TO KNOW YOUR SECRET

[takemewherethewildthingsare]

SERIOUSLY THOUGH WHAT ARE YOU

[clariphonete-deactivated2014111]

I GOT THIS AND I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

[wrappingpaper]

there are over 128,000 notes and i still got one

how

[bbassam-deactivated20151227]

i reblogged this less than 2 minutes ago

how the actual fuck

[iamsensitive]

well

do not question

[too-hilarious]

I want a doot doot

[rufflet]

Angry customer: “Well maybe I’ll just take my business somewhere else!”

Me:  

[spooksonat-deactivated20170914]

Life in retail.

[thecommonchick]

When you finally get a text, but it’s just from the phone company saying you used all the data

[catffeinemon]

Dumbledore: The Hogwarts houses? Oh, I respect them all equally! There's Gryffindor, Slytherin, uhh...

*Looks at smudged writing on hand*

Dumbledore: Rasinpaw and...

*Squints hard*

Dumbledore: Jigglypuff

[ommanyte]

I feel that substituting sleep with caffeine is a lot like drinking unicorn blood to stay immortal. You will have but a half life, a cursed life, from the moment it touches your lips

[j6]

back by unpopular demand: me

[lordofthenuvarings-deactivated2]

me when I wake up

[snauce]

shall i compare thee to a summer’s day? too hot, hot damn

[boredpanda]

[tin-pan-ali-deactivated20191216]

area 51 is just the american wizarding school

aliens is a perfect cover story

[norrington-hell]

hOLY SHIT

[theenbywholeaptthroughtime]

#STUDENTS MAKING UFOS AS PRANKS#IT’S AS TRADITIONAL AS THE TRIWIZARDS TOURNAMENT (via thestarlesswanderer)

[bluefroots]

Visit Original Link

[wenchyfloozymoo]

[fucknomontreal]

A little poetry to get you through the week. 

Loose translation: When the weather is nippier/ your tires are less grippier.

(Stolen from Roo!)

[snortinginspirit]

haaa

[mzcain27]

“You fight like a girl.”

I’m sorry

I didn’t

realise

that 

was 

a

bad

thing

[wallflowersperk]

Reblogging because I’m sure the comic readers out there could add some more.

[gayharoldfinch]

[rytfujgkuhhgmjgh]

yeah

so sorry

i can’t hear you

over the sound

of me crushing my enemies

[bonequeer]

This list

was looking

a little

white

so here you go

[blackfemmejeanvaljean]

[believeitornah]

watch tha

bodies hit

tha floor

[valhkyrie-archive-blog]

this is the best post on tumblr, hands down

[black--lamb-blog]

Daily dose of “realcasm”

Too bad white people actually got offended by these even though they are statements that have been made to me since I was old enough to talk….

The main ones getting offended are the ones who’ve said shit like this 💅 Got called ignorant because “it’s 2014 and I shouldn’t be dwelling on racism!” No bitch.. It’s 2014 and cops are still getting away with killing black kids… Hmm so a joke is the same as real life oppression now? Ok white people ok…

[slimeusa]

[lopdragon]

for @lynionpoe

[cyberspatial]

ah yes, the three most historically important revolutions. the russian, french, and dance dance