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@ceciliameadowss
stevenmattox:
Steve couldn’t help the smile from spreading across his face. He noticed her hand on her lap and placed his lightly a top of hers. “So, don’t be nervous, okay? Trust me when I tell you that I would never let anything bad happen to you.”
She let out a soft sigh as he placed his hand over hers, comforted by the gesture. “Nerves aren’t really something one can control, but I get the point. Fine. I’ll try to chill out.”
stevenmattox:
It was a red light, Steve braked the car to a stop and looked over at Cece. “Can I ask you something, and you answer me in complete honesty?” he kept his eyes on her. “Do you trust me?”
Cecilia looked over at him with big bambi eyes, a little nervous to answer his question. “I do trust you, Steve. Of course I do.” And she wasn’t lying. She didn’t trust a lot of people, but with Steve the trust came more easily, she knew that he would never do anything to intetionally harm her in any way.
stevenmattox:
“You can say it, yknow,” he grabbed the wheel with both hands instead of leaving the one, just to make her feel a bit safer. “I know you’re scared because of what happened before… with Spencer.”
“It’s not that at all.” she attempted to reassure, but knew that there was no way Steve would believe her. “It’s the same way in Lyfts and stuff, something about someone else having control freaks me out.”
"Sorry, its just that I get very nervous when someone else is driving."
"But this is the only thing that's made the last three years bearable,” he said taking a nice big gulp from a beer bottle bc that’s just who is he.
She takes the beer bottle from him and takes a drink, making a face at the taste. “I will never understand why you like drinking something that tastes stale.”
He chuckled before playing with a lock of her hair before placing it behind her ear. “I don’t really care for the taste, I guess. Anyway, they’re not all bad.”
stevenmattox:
He chuckled before playing with a lock of her hair before placing it behind her ear. “I don’t really care for the taste, I guess. Anyway, they’re not all bad.”
“Yet you drink it like it’s water.” She pointed out, feeling a bit feistier than usual. “There must be something about it that does it for you.”
"But this is the only thing that's made the last three years bearable,” he said taking a nice big gulp from a beer bottle bc that’s just who is he.
She takes the beer bottle from him and takes a drink, making a face at the taste. “I will never understand why you like drinking something that tastes stale.”
stevenmattox:
Steve didn’t move away from her this time, instead he just stood still. He still refused to meet her gaze. “I’m fine, Cece. I just gotta be alone for a while, okay?”
She sighed in relief when he didn’t move away and hesitantly a hand on his arm. “You’ve been alone enough.”
stevenmattox:
He couldn’t even look at her because he is so disappointed in himself. “I–I can’t. Okay?” he quickly wiped his face with the sleeve of his sweater, hoping she didn’t notice. “And if I.. God, if I ever hurt you…” he couldn’t even finish the sentence because he didn’t even want to think of such an awful thing.
Cece was at a loss for how to comfort him. Steve was stubborn and she knew no matter what she said, he’d continue to blame himself for what happened. “Steve, you won’t hurt me. You won’t ever do anything like that again..” She attempted to move closer to him once more. “I’m really worried about you.”
stevenmattox:
“For what?” he said, moving back from Cece, his heart feeling heavy as he did so. “Just so I can hurt somebody else? What good would that do anyone?”
It crushed her when he moved away but she persisted. “You aren’t going to make the same mistakes again, Steve. That’s not who you are. It was just one wrong decision.”
stevenmattox:
“I hurt him…” his voiced broke slightly, but he did his best to keep his composure. “I did it, me.” he shook his head. “I don’t care about what happens to me, but Spencer… How could he ever forgive me? I can’t.”
“Spencer has forgiven you, Steve. He misses hanging out with you..” She trailed off, moving closer to the boy. “We all miss hanging out with you, we don’t understand why you’re shutting us out. Now is the time for us to stick together.”
stevenmattox:
“You don’t have to. I know what I did and I have to live with that for the rest of my life, okay? You don’t have to babysit me to make sure I’m okay, I’m fine. I just— I know I fucked up, okay?”
“So what if you wrecked your car? Big deal! You and Spencer are both alive and that’s what it’s important. People mess up. I’ve messed up plenty of times in my life. But you have to stop this.. I can’t stand to see you like this, Steve. You can’t keep punishing yourself.”
stevenmattox:
“Then tell me. I want to hear it.”
“I.. I don’t blame you for what happened, Steve. No one does. You have to stop blaming yourself.”
"You've only heard his point of view. You never asked mine."
stevenmattox:
He shook his head slightly, he didn’t know what to say. All he could do was keep crying and calling himself stupid under his breath. “I want to see him,” he said in a serious tone. He turned over to meet Cece’s gaze. “Where is he?”
“He’s in another room, but I don’t think you can just walk out of here..” She nervously knawed at her lower lip, wondering what the best option would be from here. “Let me go get your nurse, I bet she could arrange something for the two of you.”
stevenmattox:
He winced in pain once more after making the sudden movement of looking around to see if he could find Spencer anywhere. He calmed a bit one Cece said he was alright, but that was momentarily. Steve was quick to realize what he had done. Once the reality of the situation sank in, he began to sob. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” he mumbled under his breath.
As soon as he began to cry, Cecilia instinctively moved closer, resting her hand delicately on his shoulder in an attempt to be comforting. “I’m so sorry, Steve..” she trailed off, unsure of what to say next. She wanted to wrap his arms around him and hold him tightly but she was terrfied she’d hurt him or unplug one of the machines.
stevenmattox:
It took a minute for the information to register in his brain. Suddenly, flashbacks from previous night played in his head. He had remembered getting into the car with Spencer. Oh god—Spencer! His eyes widened and he looked over at Cece with panic in his eyes. “Sp–Spencer. Wh-where’s Spencer?”
The panic in Steve’s eyes scared Cece and she suddenly wished she had gotten a doctor when he woke up. “it’s okay, Steve, he’s okay. But you have to stay calm or you could hurt yourself.” She gently placed her hand on his shoulder as a sympathetic gesture. “He’s in another room and awake already, probably hitting on the poor nurses.” She forced a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood.
stevenmattox:
Steve felt a wave of relief when he heard that familiar voice, but it was very brief. When he tried speaking, he felt like his throat was on fire. He could hardly even get out a “Hi.” As the minutes passed, things began to become clearer. Steve knew two out of three things. He knew that he was in the hospital and that he was in an absolute tremendous amount of pain, but what he didn’t know is how he got there. “Wh–what happened?”
“You were in an accident..” Cecilia answered softly, not wanting to frighten him by being too loud. She wasn’t sure if she should be the one to tell him this or if it was more appropriate for a doctor. She didn’t know exactly what his injuries were anyway, she was too hysterical when she got to the hospital to understand what the nurses were explaining.
