Shoelaces.

noun. /ˈʃuːˌleɪs/ : a long, thin material string that is used for fastening my life

[cejas-y-aventuras]

Pls, let the hurt stop already.

It’s almost a month now and I’m still hurting. I still find myself crying on nights when I remember how sad I’m supposed to be, sober nights when I miss you the most. I’m trying so hard to move on and be happy but every time I do, I just end up imagining on how happier it would’ve been if it was with you. I do still love you, that I can’t ever deny.

These past days, I’ve been crying not because I miss you but because you’re intentionally hurting my feelings in the worst possible ways. But why are we hurting like this? It was supposed to be over so that we can avoid the hurt and the hate to could come along with it. But what is this now? Why are you being so insensitive? You know me too well to ever pull off something that would actually break me. 

I still want you. I really do. But if you continue to cause me this much pain, I’d be fooling myself to ever say it or even think about it. Pls, let the hurt stop already. 

[josefegwaras]

Sa panahon ngayon, bawal mag-assume Bawal feelings, bawal ma-attach Kasi kung ma-fall ka, lugi ka Kung ma-inlove ka, talo ka chill lang kayo, wala ng higit pa

Ang dami ko ng narinig na ganyang linya I just really enjoy your company Let’s just go with the flow I dont want anything serious I’m not ready for a relationship At siyempre ung “basta chill lang” Ikaw si sige okay lang, same same, easy lang, easy lang

Magkausap araw-araw, mapa-text o mapa-chat Kahit nasa class o nasa office, usapan niyo'y walang awat Sabi ng kaibigan, bes ano yan i dont think that’s right At ikaw ay magsasabing, hindi to serious, di nga kami nagogoodnight

Sinusubukang magstay sa boundaries kasi baka ma-attach Kaya ayan nagTinder parin sobrang kinikilig pag may naka-match Ang galing kasi may sari-sarili parin kayong mundo Kung tutuusin kayo lang ata nakakaalam ng love story niyo Pero okay lang kasi nga chill lang kayo No strings, no attachments, hindi naman kayo

Ano nga bang problema sa chill lang Walang expectations at walang nagaabang Puro perks at walang prerequisites You get to enjoy the kilig and the benefits

Pero nakakalito kapag lagi na siyang nasa isip mo Kapag may ibang nilalandi, sabi ng utak na uy parang mali ata to Kapag may nagtatanong ano nga ba kayo Hindi alam kung anong isasagot mo Teka nga teka nga, sino ba siya sayo? Hindi mo siya jowa, friends lang daw kayo Pero ano na nga ba ang ibig sabihin ng kaibigan? Sobrang nagbago ang definition ng nagdaan

Friend lang ba kapag sinasabihan kung nasan siya Friend lang ba kapag yinayakap kapag umiiyak ka Friend lang ba kapag ikaw ang laging kasama Friend lang ba kapag tinituruan magdota “Oo” sasabihin ng iba, hanggang sa naging malabo na

Kaibigan lang ba kapag ikaw lang ang nilalambing Kaibigan lang ba kapag kayo ay magkasiping Kaibigan lang ba kapag siya'y kasama sa pagising Kaibigan lang ba kapag sa sarap at sakit siya'y kapiling Kaibigan lang ba kahit parang girlfriend ka na ituring Hindi, kaya ayan umiiyak ka kapag naririnig ang hotline bling

Isang araw nawala nalang siya Di mo alam kung saan napunta Pero buti kasi yung iba naggogoodbye pa I feel like what we’re doing is wrong, sabi niya Edi bakit mo sinimulan, bakit ginawa tangina Pero di mo alam kung bakit ka pa nabigla Hindi ka naman kasi jowa

Pero yung sakit abot buto Kasi pinigilan ko ang nararamdaman ko Paulit ulit na karol wag, mali to Ngunit di maloloko ang puso ko Kasi alam kong iba na talaga to Nung titinitigan sa mata ng diretso Yun pala di totoo, mga yakap mo Pero naghanda pa nga ako May evacuation plan ng iniwan mo ko Pero Ilang beer man ang inumin ko Ilang alon man ang isurf ko At ilang tao man ang imomol ko Ramdam ka parin talaga ng buong sistema ko

Pero ngayon okay na, mas masaya na ako Durog at sawi, binabaon ang sarili sa trabaho Nakangiti parin kahit bigo ng todo Pero di mawawala ang tanong to Gago ba siya, o naging tanga lang ako

[cejas-y-aventuras]

I'm leaving this here so I won't forget

I’m leaving this here so I won’t forget how much we tried to deny our love. We were greedy, we knew we were in love and yet we did what we could to put it off. It wasn’t easy for me, nor for you, but we did it somehow. Now, that it’s dead and gone, on this Halloween night I am haunted by it. (I hope you are too.)

The memories are scratching in so desperately. Those sober nights where we slept side by side, and how much we tried to face the other side of the bed while hearing each other’s heavy breathes, and still we’d end up waking up in each other’s arms. And those nights where we couldn’t drunk text or call each other because we were already out being intimate with our clothes on. We didn’t kiss, no we aren’t in the position to do that, but I was convinced that I wanted to only if I could. I was convinced that I wanted you. I was so comfortable and safe in your arms, and I knew you were too as you slept so soundly in mine.

I may have regretted missing out a chance with someone so dear, but I never regretted falling for him even if it wasn’t for me to fall in the first place. I wish to try again, but in a different way.

[cejas-y-aventuras]

I ended up staying up late just to talk to you to actually let myself fall in love with you I guess you knew that I was but you just couldn't say and I'll just patiently wait. I'll wait not because I'm stupid or clingy but because you are worthy. Figure it out soon while I still can't find someone as good as you because if I do.........

[cejas-y-aventuras]

not the classic but still in black & white

[cejas-y-aventuras]

Don’t

This isn’t the lyrics to one of my favorite Ed Sheeran songs but feelings which I can’t even deny to myself anymore.

Don’t touch me because it makes me want to hold on to you again. We could’ve been fine if I, too, wasn’t denial of how much I wanted to hold on. I just didn’t have the courage to take such risk even though I knew how deep I was falling. Countless times I’ve been having second thoughts about you and countless times I’ve let my feelings bury those thoughts. 

Don’t smile at me, it makes me wanna lose it. I couldn’t help but smile too when I take a glimpse of your teeth. You got pretty teeth, to be honest. And I’m at a disadvantage right now because I like you a lot more than how much you liked me before and I still like you the same even though I know yours is starting to fade away.

I wasn’t too sure what we were before but I knew we had this thing they call “Skinny Love,” even Birdy would agree to it. I reflected over the song but the song wasn’t a definite to what I was going through. I was just happy to feel in love even though our mutual status was actually just reserved. 

I’m glad things are not too awkward between us, just don’t step over the line again. Don’t act up and send mixed signals again. Just don’t let me fall for you further, what I feel about you now is enough to last ‘til my next heartbreak.

Passports and Flowers

[cejas-y-aventuras]

Daydreams & Silhouettes

I may have listened to your stories too well that even my dreams replay fabrics of them. Don’t worry, I played them perfectly in my head. But honestly, you’re starting to blur in my memories.

[cejas-y-aventuras]

A good movie/book is my excuse to cry out my feelings.

It just might be a teardrop from my right eye but the feelings in it were kept for long. So long that there wasn’t enough emotion to show it because time got me used to it. Honestly, my heart pounds heavily as I type words into this post. A part in me hopes that nobody could read but also a part of me wishes somebody could.

Life gave me so much to wonder yet I may have wandered far enough.I got scared of getting hurt, risking experiences. Still scared of it really. But I realized that the recent pains I felt were because of my inability to respond to feelings building up inside me. I guess that actual words for it would be that I ignored them but I’ll leave the previous sentence up there as a head start.

I’m feeling something. Yes. And I’m writing about it. Movies and books helped me in crying out of it. “It’s heartache,” someone reading this would say, but it’s not. It’s excitement. Life sometimes is too much for a 20-year-old female like me and I thank the good writers and poets for painting over clear skies in such times. My feelings went up and down all the way getting me confused somehow but the quality of a good movie or book made it seem worthy of having them. Whether I’m happy or hurt, even if my feelings can’t relate to it, those good stories just gave me the opportunity to pour out what’s inside me; even if it’s beyond my experience or made up, I still get a good cry on it if I have.

It’s a good feeling. I guess to me, it’s the best.

[cejas-y-aventuras]

I'm not sure if posting this is a good idea

We accidentally met because of a little chubby kiddo. He was going cray cray about seeing the fireworks that night. He then unintentionally bumped into you. I was a bridesmaid and you were also participating in a wedding of sort. While picking up the little monster, I looked up and said, "Oh, Hi! It's you." Clearly you were also amused of our accidental meet up. You smiled or maybe even laugh that moment, I really don't remember but I saw you smile for sure. We ended up talking while waiting for the fireworks in a particular spot at the side of the rooftop that had a really huge bell hanging. The fireworks was taking too long but we still talked and waited and talked more and more with one beer on one hand. I was sitting on the enge, you were standing beside my thighs. The fireworks started to play. He looked up, I looked up. It was quite a moment. He then suddenly looked at me, I felt uneasy that moment. It was like he was looking at me and at the same looking at the fireworks display. I decided to laugh to cut the moment, he then also laughed. The night was a movie-like-scene and it was good until.... "Can I get your number?" He asked while looking back at the fireworks. I replied, "oh my God, L**, are you hitting on me right now?" I made it sound like it was a joke but he replied a yes... We both were quiet then. I took a deep breathing while looking down and finally said, "No, you have a girlfriend." L: I know. And it sucks to have this moment just now. Me: It's definitely a no. (Laughed a little there) L: Why not? I mean were also friends. Me: But clearly you have no intentions of just being a friend L: I don't know. All I know right now is I'm wanting you. Worst, I think I'm starting to.... (I cutted in) Me: No, you have a girlfriend. L: I know that! Please stop bringing it up. Just minutes ago I was proud of her but right now it's annoying me. He took his phone out. A small samsung keypad phone, a little old school. Clearly just to stay in contact with his girlfriend. Me: I already said no, L**. L: I'm really getting annoyed right now. But don't be mistaken, it's not because you're not giving your number or what, I just hate that this moment has come this late. It's pissing me off. Me: It ' alright. We were just blinded by the fireworks there. (Smiled at him) He took a deep sigh. Looking down at his beer. L: No, I know to myself that I had a crush on you before but I couldn't speak up because my friend was clearly into you then but now I'm going to. Knowing that you're still single to this time really makes me want you more. This may be a careless move but let me have your number. Me: No, you can't. I know right now that I'm in love with ***** but giving you my number would mean that I could like you back someday. I'm not risking it especially because you also have someone right now. So many hearts will be broken if we'd continue. A cousin of his then suddenly came in and asked him to return with him to the hotel. I said, "Go, it has been a long night for all of us." He looked frustrated, he got teary-eyed all of the sudden. I got worried and was about to tap his back but he nudged and turned and angrily threw his phone to ground. He marched along with his cousin back to their hotel. I was left alone on the spot, feeling bothered. I started crying. I wasn't supposed to cry but I did. It was a first that my heart ached that much for a very short moment...

[babyanimalposts]

[darksilenceinsuburbia]

[thebabyanimals]

[babyanimalposts]

feeling down? you need this baby animal blog

[dashausofjack]

Visit Original Link

[cejas-y-aventuras]

I'm either a girly girl or a lazy prude wearing eyebrows

[cejas-y-aventuras]

Relationship Status

I’m not looking for love right now. I can say I’m waiting, but not looking. Everything is just a butterfly short for me. I even sometimes look for faults myself to stop the madness early, but, in my defense, I just honestly am not that ready for another heartbreak. Everything nowadays just seems too temporary and fragile. 

But ...

I almost did fall in love again. Almost. Again, it was a butterfly short. 

[cejas-y-aventuras]

#bestiesbookclub

Besties Book Signing @ SM Lanang Premiere, DVO

Oh myyyy.. My book got signed! (I actually bought another for them to sign it.) It was a dream come true to actually meet in person my favorites!! SOS and George, you guys are really an inspiration to me. Please continue whatever awesomeness you guys are doing. I just can’t believe I got the chance to actually touch and hug you both. Thank you so much!!! Hoping for another chance like this. ‘Til next time!

[cejas-y-aventuras]

every girl is crazy

you just gotta find that one girl you can either go crazy with or at least handle how crazy she gets for every flaw you confess