aTaLoSsFoRleMoNs

My attempts at trying to sift through pulp.

[channadaal]

Embedded Naturally #dailylego #black #nature #beauty #series7 #legousa #LEGO #lego #legofun #legofan #legophotography #minifigures #legominifigures #fun #creative #imagination #naturephotography #creativephotography #imaginationphotography #legogirl #legogirladventures https://www.instagram.com/p/CYAx9dDL-YB/?utm_medium=tumblr

[channadaal]

Adventures of Lego Girl Pt. 398

Unable to Bear the mud

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[channadaal]

Trying to mine my own business

Trying to mine my own business

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[channadaal]

Trying to mine my own business

Trying to mine my own business

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[channadaal]

Hungering for Victory

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[mbti-notes]

Hi, I want to thank you for your efforts and dedication to this site. I found it to be very professional and insightful. I have one question: I am INTJ and currently I am assisting ISFJ how to acquire certain job related skills. I feel that in some cases my ideas are not really being accepted because I present them in INTJ fashion. What is the best way for me to present my thoughts to ISFJ so he it would make sense to him?

One word: Ideas must be PRACTICABLE, from their point-of-view, not yours. You can present whatever idea you want, but you should also constantly solicit their honest feedback about how practical the idea sounds to them, whether they believe it is doable for them, otherwise you are at risk of just going on and on about nothing after you’ve lost them a long time ago (Ni v Si clash). Soliciting feedback also makes it seem more like a discussion rather than you just telling them what to do (and then they make a simple calculation of can/can’t do it instead of maintaining an open mind). The average ISFJ has difficulty being hopeful and confident about themselves, and you can exacerbate that for them by making ideas seem impossible for them to achieve, especially if they already fear that their future performance is doomed anyway. Avoid triggering any low self-esteem issues by being sensitive to their fears and getting them to discuss those fears if possible. You’ll be more convincing if there isn’t a wall of unspoken emotion between you.

[mbti-notes]

I'm an ISFJ. I have this problem where I don't realize that I feel resentful or blaming about something, sometimes rationalizing my feelings away defensively, and then when that button is pressed, I cannot control my mouth and I lash out and say really hurtful things. Why? How do I solve this? I only seem to realize how I acted after everything has died down and I'm looking back... How do I spot my defensiveness earlier? How do I deal with it? Thanks so much

This has to do with improving your emotional intelligence and a willingness to admit your true feelings rather than using them as an excuse to lash out. You have not given enough specifics about the situations that trigger you. The way to counter emotional triggers is to know what they are, to be vigilant of situations that trigger you, and then come up with strategies to behave more consciously instead of reacting like a programmed machine. If you know what your triggers are and you’re aware that you’re triggered, then you have a small opening to do something differently. When you are triggered, perhaps it’s a good idea to do something to calm down first rather than indulging the defensiveness, perhaps it’s a good idea to refocus your attention on how much you care about the person and don’t want to harm them, perhaps it’s a good idea to think about what kind of person you want to be and be it. These are just examples of strategies. Build awareness and devise a good strategy. It’s quite simple but it must be learned gradually with practice because you’re essentially trying to break a long running bad habit. See also the section on Emotional Triggers.

[mbti-notes]

INFJ. When I get in a bad mood and feel insecure, I start to feel like everyone is attacking me with small remarks that don’t mean much at all. I don’t feel good about it and realize it’s irrational but my sensitivity is hard to control. Kind of a separate issue but also: I feel worse when people notice I’m in a bad mood - especially if they patronize me about it or say stuff like “Don’t be upset/discouraged!” ( 1 / 4 )

[con’t: I can’t control the sad expressions on my face sometimes but I hate feeling like it’s affecting others - l feel like they think I’m doing it on purpose and I can snap out of it if I chose, which of course makes me feel worse. It affects group work and makes me socialize with others less. I feel like people don’t want to talk to me because of it, too. Talking is hard when I’m moody, but even if I try, I feel awful. It’s awkward and I feel like they can still tell I’m upset. In one of my club meetings at my college yesterday, I was in one of those moods, and I found myself wishing the people there would ask what was wrong/what was up so I could be honest about my day, but everyone ignored it. Only girl was just kind of patronizing in an, “Aw, don’t be upset,” but didn’t seem to care about why I was upset, which didn’t make me feel better. I felt bad because I couldn’t contribute as well to the meeting.Any tips on how I can better communicate with others about what is going on? Thank you for this blog.]

When Ni believes in “truth” without needing any facts or evidence, it is a sign of dysfunction and being removed from reality. Here’s an exercise: Read through what you wrote and when you encounter the words “they”, “them”, “people”, “everyone”, “others”, substitute them with the words “me”, “myself”, or “I”. This will get you closer to the truth of your problem.

What you describe is called projection. All of your “feelings” (which are really thoughts and judgments) about people aren’t factual truth, rather, they are merely a manifestation of your underlying fears and insecurities. If you unconsciously project your fears onto other people, then you are able to disown responsibility for them and distract yourself from the real source of the problem. It seems that people try to connect with you but how do you react? You blame them for being insensitive, patronizing, clueless, etc. Actually, it is YOU who treats you that way. YOU are judging yourself for being insecure. YOU are judging yourself for feeling bad. YOU are judging yourself for being a bad influence. YOU are judging yourself for being a nobody. YOU are judging yourself for not contributing. YOU are judging yourself for being clueless about how to solve your problems… You project your criticisms of yourself into others’ eyes and imagine that everyone must see you the same way that you do. Eventually, you buckle under all that “judgment” and then your only recourse is to retreat from social life, which easily leads to Ti loop.

The problem is that YOU do not give yourself space to be a normal human being who has ups and downs and good days and bad. The problem is that YOU wish to be fakely perfect and YOU cannot handle it when you fail. The problem is that YOU want to be seen and heard but YOU are not wiling to see and hear yourself, so you place the burden upon others to and you get mad when they don’t. You teach others how to treat you by how you treat yourself. The way that you devalue your own existence, silence your emotional needs, and suppress your negativity is teaching others that they should ignore your existence, dismiss your emotional needs, and condemn you for your negativity. 

It’s a cliche when people say “you can’t love others until you love yourself” but it is absolutely true. When you don’t love yourself, you will always feel inferior rather than equal to others, you will never be able to believe that your needs and desires are legitimate and should be attended to just like anyone else’s, you will never be able to receive love/care because you don’t believe that you deserve it, and you will always feel too ashamed to express yourself authentically (for fear that everyone will discover what you already “know”, which is that you are an imperfect and unworthy person). And how then would you be capable of having a healthy and mutually satisfying relationship? 

Yes, being able to communicate your experience is a necessary skill to learn, however, it’s not going to help when you aren’t even able to accept that you have feelings and that your experience matters in the first place. You can’t have good emotional intelligence and emotional management skills when you judge emotions as “unacceptable” and push them away. The more you push away your emotional life and try to disown it, the more it owns you. The more you try to “control”, the more emotions control you, because you’re not accepting them and they must get ever louder to be heard. It’s really not very hard to be honest and say to someone “I feel down today” and then accept their intention to comfort you, but it will feel hard to do if you believe that you don’t have the right to feel bad or if you condemn yourself for being “flawed”. Low self-worth is a common infj problem when Fe-Ti remain poorly developed, when infjs have low emotional intelligence, and/or when infjs suffer from perfectionism, search related tags as it has been discussed before.

[mbti-notes]

Anon: “I think i’m an ISFJ (girl), i’m 25 years old and i never managed to have a successful love relationship, only love disappointments. I am confident, I think I am beautiful, cool, intelligent. I have my own goals, I travel a lot, I have a life, mostly I’m fine with myself. But I only meet guys who are terrible with me, betray me, cheat, abandon me, even before I have something more concrete with me. I get involved and start indulging in involvement but at some point they ALWAYS jump out. It just happened again, i’m devastated. I really do not understand why, maybe there’s something I can’t see? Do you know if type can help? Do you have any thoughts please? the worst part is the recurrence. Thank you a lot!”

__________________________________________

I have written about patterns of attraction before, see the site index. A very common pattern of attraction is between functional opposites because of what is lacking/missing from one’s own personality (i.e. your higher functions are their lower functions and vice versa). For example, FJs and TPs are often attracted to each other. It is also common for such relationships to die a sudden death as soon as the stark differences in personality become overwhelming and overshadow any common ground between you. You should identify the personality type/temperament of the people you’re romantically attracted to, then it’s possible to compare and contrast your functions with theirs to better understand the relationship dynamic. What is it about these people that initially draws you into their orbit?

Every type has their own set of flaws and weaknesses, and the less developed an individual’s personality, the more those flaws and weaknesses show up and damage intimate relationships. For example, if they are TPs, then you’re attracted to people who: have lower emotional awareness than you, have a lower sense of relational investment and social responsibility than you, are prone to commitment issues, are more capable of callousness than you, and prefer unilateral decision making. Is this really the sort of person you want to give your time, energy, and feeling to? If not, then choose differently. If you encounter one jerk, you’re unlucky. If you keep encountering the same kind of jerk over and over again, then you have to ask yourself why you’re attracted to them. Deeper self-reflection is necessary for becoming aware of an unconscious pattern. You don’t have the ability to disrupt a pattern when you’re not even aware of it.

Type describes your process of perception and judgment, so, one way or another, your type is always relevant to bad decision making. However, before I get more specific, it is important that you are certain about your type by doing a proper type assessment. If you’re looking to use your type as a framework for understanding your decision making, it’s not enough to “think” you are an isfj, you have to be sure, otherwise, you might take advice from the wrong type and end up worse off.

[mbti-notes]

*Note to New Readers

- ICYMI, there are guidelines for submitting questions, please follow them. I get more messages than I can respond to, so I automatically omit asks that are repetitive, irrelevant, or searchable. The blog is full of info, check before asking.

- If you want help with typing, write and submit an analysis of your functions following the template in the ask guidelines (mbti-notes.tumblr.com/contact). 

- To type yourself as accurately as possible, understand:

The 8 Cognitive Functions: what they are, how they differ;

Function Dynamics: how functions influence each other;

Type Dynamics: the role of each function in the stack;

Type Development: how to identify underdeveloped functions;

Assessment: determining which functional stack best describes the patterns of your psychological processes and motivations via self-observation, objective feedback, and careful introspection.

Many people only get through step 1 and then want to jump to step 5, which is insufficient for really understanding yourself. You won’t benefit much from typology if you haven’t learned enough type theory.

- Mental illness does not change the method of typing because it does not change your type. An unhealthy personality means: 1) you are likely to have low self-awareness and therefore poor self-control, so you might have difficulty perceiving yourself accurately and knowing why you do things, and 2) you are likely to use your functions in unhealthy ways. Therefore, steps 2-4 above become very important, which means you need to dig deeper and learn type theory in more detail to get the answers you want. You are starting from a more difficult place, however, many people have reported to me that the process of learning function theory helped them sort out mental issues when other methods failed, so it seems worth the effort.

[funkymbtifiction]

Si/Ne and auxiliary functions mainly, I guess?

How does lower Si vs higher Si behave? I get aspects of Si doms and auxiliaries(I think I do wonder how aux functions work though). If I am right about being an INFP, I get this feeling my Ne gets going when I feel connected emotionally to thoughts or ideas. Ask me to brainstorm about something I know/care little for, and I don’t feel I have a lot to offer. Is this how it’s supposed to work?

When I’ve been really into a TV show or something, I can recall speculating various ways about how something was going to happen(usually a TV show as you have more info or depth to work with and more time for stories/characters to develop) in various possible ways. I just remember this instance where a prediction I made months prior turned out more or less correct.This probably happened more than once but no one pointed it out and I don’t recall exactly) and my friend remembered and said “:what are you a psychic” I just explained, no, but with the information/what we knew it had to happen in most likely 3 to 4 ways ,reminding her not every speculation I said happened. If i had been uninterested, I’d doubt I’d have had much to guess about at all.

i often wonder if aux Ne can work this way? I guess this brings me to high Si to to lower Si. I  continuously open the wrong drawers in my kitchen YEARS after I’ve moved. The second drawer down holds the spatulas/ladles/big spoons ect, and third aluminum foil, plastic wrap, plastic baggies ect. It used to be the opposite. I don’t always get it wrong, but I do it often enough I feel ridiculous..I feel quite strongly that I am an SI user vs Se and have done for awhile(even when doubting) because even with sensory information coming in I seem to like to draw it back to a personal feeling or place. I am terrible beyond anything at having a good read on surroundings.If people ask me to look for signs I become like a dog, hyper focusing because I am afraid I will miss it) I miss things I later notice, and go “Oh look that’s so cool, that been there long?” to find it has.

I guess it just didn’t peak my interest until then, I love forest trails/walks. but I always feel like it’s not just the physical beauty, but how I feel about it. I can imagine a person hundreds of years ago walking through this place(I know the likelihood of that path even being there isn’t really accurate) Or I get quite the feeling of whimsy as I associate forests with magical stories and fairy tales). So, basically - does higher Si do better at actually remember where the heck in their kitchen things are, or are lower users worse at it? Does it tell anything about the use of Si? As I speculated about aux Ne feeding into dom Fi, what about tertiary Si feeding into Ne? Saying “Yes this is a possibility as similar outcomes have occurred in such situations” as if helping to keep the Ne idea zooming more accurate??

Ne and Si work together as a team. You won’t notice them operating individually most of the time – Si is going “where have I seen this before / what can I compare it to?” and Ne takes that information and draws  a presumption from it. If A + B = C last time, and this situation is similar to A + B, we can assume C is the result. Guessing a plot twist right isn’t necessarily indicative of high intuition, because sensors can also do it. My ISTJ not only predicted the outcomes of every single presidential election accurately (statistics / historical trends; A + B = C) she guessed the ending of many suspense films from their obscure trailers.

The introverted functions are subjective, which means whenever you are dealing with them, their focus isn’t on the object, but what it means to them.

A Si user isn’t seeing Disneyland for all its moving parts and the rides. If Disneyland has been a happy place for them, they see it in terms of Disneyland = Happiness. Disneyland = My Innocent Childhood, when I was Happy. Disneyland = My Escape from Reality into my Innocent, Happy Childhood. Each time they need that happy fix, they can get it at Disneyland. Because they aren’t seeing the peeling paint on the rides or the long lines or thinking about the screaming children. They are seeing a Happy Place. It’s all subjective, because they are associating it with a specific memory from their childhood – a moment when at Disneyland with their family, it wasn’t about the Peter Pan ride anymore, it became “to me, this is Happiness.” The Si will ignore the reality of Disney and what it has become, in favor of Disney = Happiness. A + B for me = C.

Ni would also derive something from Disney, but it might see Disney as representative of a larger symbol – an abstraction of itself. Disney = Commerce. Ambition. Power. Greed. Dreams.

It’s all about perception and what you draw from it. If Si is leading Ne around, then Happiness replaces Ne (the bigger picture). If Ne is leading Si around, the park becomes a sentimental place, nothing more. If Ni is leading Se, the symbol becomes all. If Se is leading Ni, the park is a place where you feel the wind in your hair, and the energy from everyone standing in line, and the rumble beneath your feet when the roller coaster whizzes by, and the popcorn smell in the air, and the bubblegum stuck to the bottom of your shoe, and the taste of your hot dog.

Take it further, into the judging functions – it becomes what seems systematically logical about a thing (Ti), or what carries personal meaning and significance to you (Fi), vs objectively how it impacts everyone (Fe) and how you accomplish things in a tangible, effective manner (Te).

- ENFP Mod

[funkymbtifiction]

Do you suggest any books that talk in-depth about the cognitive functions, asides from Jung?

I’ve given recommendations before, which you can find in our book list tag,but I’m reading Lenore Thomson’s Personality Types at the moment andit’s great. Expensive but well worth the money. She goes deeper intoeach type than I’ve seen before, explains it in both easy to understand andcomplex ways, and I’ve had stuff cleared up for me just in the opening chaptersthan in reading a ton of other material / online resources. The section aloneon the P vs J mentality was awesome; I found myself nodding along witheverything about P. Just as an example, she talks about how Js often feel aneed to plan in advance and have things “settled,” whereas the more “settled”something is, the more anxious the P type becomes, because it’s excluding optionsin favor of a a single, focused course (which Ne/Se doesn’t like).

My only quibble is with her test – given my 6 Enneagram slant, I came outas an NTJ because I answered based on my behaviors and not my mentalinstincts… which now that I think about it, may be the problem with thetests. Answering based on behavior and/or self-perceived behavior, as opposedto our first mental instinct. All my mental processing is Pe but most of myactions are J because I’m cautious about leaping into things without lookingfirst.

She had a great example of functional imbalance development, in which she usedan INTJ she knows as an example. This woman had moved to NYC and had to jointhe rat race. Before then, she’d been comfortable just in her Ni visualizingand lost in her head. Moving to an intense city where she had to compete everymorning on the subway to find a way to work forced her to cope with the outsideworld. Instead of reaching for Te and finding a rational solution to herproblem (which would be get up earlier and take a less crowded train), shedeveloped Se. She became intense and aggressive in grabbing a seat. Her bodywas constantly on edge, waiting for the subway. It became all about getting herplace and keeping it. But she noticed that all around her were smiling,confident, happy people – all of whom gave her a wide berth. Her unnatural inferiorSe overreacting had made her needlessly aggressive and intense, to the pointwhere others could see it and wanted to avoid her as a hostile force. The Seawoke so much that she was constantly getting information fed to her Ni, whichsent her flashes of intuition – she found herself judging people, leaping toconclusions about their motives, and not at all liking how reactive it madeher. Only when she let go of Se and started learning to adapt with Te (such astaking an earlier subway so that she could easily get a seat, relax, and readuntil her stop, and networking at her job to get things done) did she find“balance.”*

So yeah, damn good book. It must be, if I’m ignoring Good Omens toread it. Might even change the way I type in the future so… progress! Deeper insights!

- ENFP Mod

* Whenever S’s use S, it’s effortless and easy. Whenever N’s use S, it comes across as overly aggressive because we don’t know when “enough” is “enough.”

[funkymbtifiction]

is it true that infjs “absorb” emotions and infps put themselves into the other persons shoes? i find myself doing the latter and can be very detached from other’s emotions, but i’m also fairly certain that i’m an infj. is this a sign of mistyping? what are the major differences between infjs and infps?

Fe acts like a sponge. Whatever you are feeling, it taps into and mirrors it. I was loving this but the person I am with is bored so we need to do something.

Fi asks itself how it would feel in that position, and from that reacts. This means the Fi may be reacting more strongly to something that isn’t bothering the other person at all, because it would offend THEM. So if THEY are bored, they may assume the other person must also be bored, rather than knowing if they are bored or not by tuning in to their emotional vibes.

You are focusing selectively on one component of an INFX and assuming you can draw your correct type from it. You have to look at the big picture – the overall differences in approaches.

From Lenore’s book Personality Types:

P: never feel they have enough information to decide, and may seek new options even after deciding

J: may decide before all the facts are in or limit their options just to have things settled and off their mind

P: react fully and quickly to whatever happens to catch their attention

J: want to know what’s going to happen so they can prepare for it

P: are ready for anything but may depend too much on chance and circumstance

J: are self-motivated, but may be unprepared to deal with the unexpected

P: resist structure; may not start a project until motivated by the arrival of a deadline

J: prefer structure; will organize time and efforts to meet goals and deadlines

P: may take on too many projects, or keep going until they are overloaded and unable to do it all

J: do exactly what they say they’re going to do, and will renegotiate if more is required

P: may experience their emotions as physical states and become run down

J: may not be aware of their physical needs until they have a real problem

P: are curious, adaptable masters of improvisation but may not follow through or stick to something very long

J: are responsible, firm, true to their word, but may be unwilling to change even when things are going badly

P: are enthusiastic, engaged, impetuous

J: are decisive, committed, determined

P: can be reckless, may not consider risks or time constraints when drawn to something exciting

J: can be controlling, may take authority instinctively, certain they know what needs to be done

See? Different approaches even before you get to the major differences between Fi//Fe, Ti/Te, Si/Se and Ni/Ne.

- ENFP Mod

[funkymbtifiction]

How do you spot someones inferior, auxiliary and tertiary functions in real life?

They’re rigid the further down the stack you find them.

A healthy higher function is flexible.

When dealing with kids, you’re dealing with immature dominant functions that are going to fit the stereotypes much more than dealing with an adult; the more they mature, the more mature their dominant functions become… but it takes a long time for the bottom two functions to reach that state of optimal health.

For the most part, it plays out like this:

Mature high Si knows the value of seeking additional perspectives and the careful accumulation of data and information before reaching a judgment. This is the flexible SJ open to new experiences and traditions, vs the NP who flat out refuses to allow anyone to change their sacred tradition, because it will ‘ruin’ the holiday, because THIS IS ALWAYS HOW WE DO IT. Or who refuses to open themselves up to a new idea because THAT’S NOT HOW I WAS TAUGHT.

High Si: reasonable.

Low Si: immature, fussy, and unreasonable.

Carry it over to the rest of the functions.

It’s the difference between a Ni-dom/aux fairly certain of their futuristic prediction but also open to changing it with additional information and/or leaving a margin of error and low Ni, which becomes rigid, dogmatic, stubborn and persistent in insisting that THIS IS WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN, AND IT HAS TO PLAY OUT EXACTLY LIKE I WANT IT TO, PERIOD.

It’s the difference between a high Se who navigates opportunities and is easily able to choose the right ones to make a dramatic difference in the environment or cause a positive chain reaction of events, vs the low Se that just flings itself on opportunities without the ability to sense what will work and what won’t, so they are only self-sabotaging in their flailing about.

It’s the difference between a high Ne who instinctively reads patterns and often correctly interprets what’s actually going on / the motives behind something, or knows which ideas are rubbish or have no lasting value, and the low Ne that becomes frantic at the thought of “narrowing down their options,” or clings to an interpretation of something that is clearly far-fetched and unrealistic (because they feel they know the truth).

It’s the difference between a high Ti who effortlessly makes their logic consistent and discards and adapts new logic and changes their thinking when proven wrong, and a low Ti that becomes defensive, insistent only their way makes sense, angry that you can’t understand what they mean, and places a ton of emphasis on ‘being rational’ (while… never being rational themselves).

It’s the difference between a high Te who can simplify an existing system so that anyone can do their job and hands off responsibilities to other people, and who changes their mind when presented with the facts, and a low Te who doesn’t know how to organize their time or what to do first, so they dictate and order people around and become defensive if their plan doesn’t work, and stubbornly cling to ‘the facts’ whether or not they are actual facts.

It’s the difference between a high Fe who knows how to calm people down and motivate them to work together easily, who thinks about including everyone in the group and making sure they feel they are vital to the movement, and a low Fe who continually alienates people when they try to be inclusive, who fails to truly care about those involved (thus giving a sense of ‘fake’ ness), and who becomes stubborn under pressure about other people not going along with things because THEY SHOULD.

It’s the difference between a high Fi who values their own autonomy so much that they extend the same belief in the freedom for self expression to everyone else regardless of whether they agree or disagree with their opinion (the mantra of “nobody should have control over anybody else”), and the low Fi who develops this same belief and tramples other people’s rights attempting to make it happen.

So, in a nutshell – look at what’s effortless for them and energizes them, look at what’s harder for them and wears them out, and frankly, look at what they suck at, because chances are that’s their lowest function.

My Si is terrible. I suck at details. My mom called me from the store the other day to ask, “What kind of laundry detergent did you want?” And I had no idea, because I just dump that stuff in the washer. I never read the front. I never noticed the brand. Clueless, I said, “Uh… it has blue on it. I think. I dunno, just buy me whatever you use.”

I have never known an N not to berate someone else for neglecting details, so also pay attention to that. People tend to assume other people have their same blind spots and difficulties and come down hard on them for it, when it’s really just about them. My ENFJ at work is always yelling at me when I forget a client’s name. But he never remembers either. :P

- ENFP Mod

[funkymbtifiction]

how do you learn to spot the differences between who you are, and who you want to be? I think that is my main problem why i suck at self-typing

Great question!

Self typing is extremely difficult for this very reason. The answer is… gradual self-awareness. And it’s something of a catch-22, because your best self-awareness comes when you’ve found your correct type(s) and are able to see them through the lens of cognition / Enneagram motives so you can identify what you are doing and why you are doing it… but it takes a certain amount of self-awareness to find them in the first place. The higher your self-awareness, the more realistically you see your strengths and flaws and the easier it will be for you to find your type.

However, most people are not aware of the strength of their dominant function. It is effortless and unconscious, an engine humming in the background, directing most of your focus and thoughts without you being aware of it. It’s easier at times to identify lower functions, because you notice them. You are even proud of using them, not realizing that your use of them is like a child being proud of tying their shoe vs. someone creating designer shoes.

The solution is to look for the facts. Proof. Evidence.

Who you think you are is how you think you react.

Who you are is actually how you react.

Who you think you are is what you see in the mirror.

Who you are is what other people see on a daily basis.

Who you think you are is your justifications for all your decisions.

Who you are is what drove you to make all those justifications.

The only way you can track this is to start paying attention to yourself. Keep a journal for awhile. Write down how you handled things, how you reacted to new information, where you overreacted and why you felt that way, what makes you feel intimidated, what causes you to feel anxious or pressured or stress. Look at how you handle your feelings. How you solve problems. Look at how you write and talk about why you write in the way you do. Are you seeking structure? Are you more about winging it? Do you do that for your entire life? Look for patterns that repeat themselves. Ask other people you trust, who seem to know you well (an attentive parent or friend you’ve had for a long time who has taken a genuine interest in you) what they see as your strengths and weaknesses.

When I had poor self-awareness, I was relying on strangers online to type me based off what I said. Their answers never matched the responses of family and friends who knew me well enough to see patterns of where my assertions about myself did not match my actual behaviors or thought processes. They had an objective view of me that I lacked. You need to be humble enough to listen to them and not fight back when they list the areas in which you “fail.” They are talking about your lower functions.

There really is no way to speed this process up, especially if you really want to learn about yourself and are devoted to integration (Enneagram) and functional maturity (MBTI). It took me years to make the first breakthrough but then it gets easier.

- ENFP Mod

[funkymbtifiction]

How can you distinguish between someone with Dom Ne and someone with tert Ne? How do I know that I'm not really an EsXj trying to convince myself I'm more free wheeling than I really am?

Depends on if Ne is your life, or you just use it to “play.”

Dom-Ne takes itself seriously, it reads between the lines and infers things automatically (often without proof), it has very little access to details and frequently overlooks them, it over-estimates its abilities and exaggerates them (due to poor Si awareness), it loses its train of thought easily, goes down rabbit trails, improvises while it is working on something and may discard one idea for another extremely quickly since the ideas keep coming once it starts work, it tends toward instant wit / banter / covering up feelings with humor and is not at all aware of the sensory environment in a tangible way.

Tert-Ne uses Ne to problem-solve to help its higher functions; it is always guided by Te/Fe or Si to some extent, which means it’s great at brainstorming in the moment but does not spend much time in ideas-generation or creating theories for their own sake; it tends to focus more on having a variety of tastes or interests or knowing a lot about a bunch of different things than on operating on hunches without any proof, it is more focused and less scattered, it “wears” down more quickly than Ne-dom (which could have an abstract conversation that lasts hours without needing to clarify anything), and it often creates bigger problems in situations when it operates on Ne “hunches” than it “fixes” things.

A Ne-dom operates on intuition; they live and breathe it. It is their language.

Also, what’s your inferior function? No idea? Can’t think up a single example to ‘prove’ concretely that you were doing this, with this motivation, when you made that decision, which aligns perfectly with what the inferior function actually does and acts like? Congrats, you have inferior Si. ;)

- ENFP Mod

[funkymbtifiction]

The role of Inferior Ne

SUBMITTED BY Steve

It’s been brought to my attention that many ISxJs mistype themselves as their NP counterparts because A) They relate to having all sorts of ideas B) They find themselves creative and C) They don’t relate to all the stereotypes associated with ISxJs. 

Well, guess what? Everyone can be creative and have tons of wacky ideas. Even the Ni/Se-Se/Ni people. But ask yourself is that is your main drive in life. Not saying that NP types just run on unrealistic ideas but that abstract connections in the sensory world is usually their default method. 

Ask yourself if you exhibit any of these instead:

1. You are very capable of witty, sarcastic rebuttals and usually think of it as your “fun” side

ISxJs when under stress or when they are caught off guard, can easily become real life RuPauls, just spouting off some on the cuff sarcastic (usually pop-cultured) comment to express how they feel about the issue at hand. While this behavior is usually associated with high Ne-users and it makes sense, Inferior Ne users also have this as part of their arsenal when the time comes and are usually proud of it, because it actually demanded a great deal of energy for them to come up with that sick burn and it was all worth it. I’ve always argued that Chandler from Friends is actually an ISxJ because his smart, sarcastic mouth usually comes out when he is under stress and dealing with the irrational. Fun fact but my ENTP friend and his ENFP girlfriend decided this year to buy a real Christmas tree as it is traditional and more “real”. They are getting such a kick out of it, because they too, use their inferior function (Si) for fun. 

2. You use Ne to placate all possible negative outcomes

This is really the calling card for ISxJ types. They evaluate a situation, then go Ne crazy under stress and then re-evaluate the situation again from all possible angles thoroughly and meticulously finding a solution to all possible outcomes. Someone hasn’t replied to you on Messenger after 2 days? Maybe they’re busy, so then just wait. Maybe they’re mad at you so then, just wait and if there’s still no reply, confront them. Still no reply after all this time? Maybe it’s time to just cut them loose and move on. In either case, you know you have a strong answer for any scenario. There’s also the possibility that this person will contact you way later down the road because you HAVE been a loyal friend despite whatever beef they have with you and they recognize that. And in this case, you should be more than prepared to handle them. 

3. You use Ne to break yourself out of rut or unhealthy routine. 

Whether it is something really serious as absolutely hating your job or something way more light-hearted such as being tired of ordering Chinese every Friday night. Ne is there to help you break free of those chains. In the former case, you are a Si-Dom so you know better than anyone what your strengths and weaknesses are. So it’s time to use the latter to look for greater opportunity where you will be seen as extremely valuable. You owe it to yourself. In the latter case, you might wanna check out more “crazy” recipes online and treat yourself. You might actually have fun and a great sense of accomplishment in doing something new that actually works for you. 

There’s also the whole unhealthy relationship thing. Please don’t stay with an abusive partner out of blind loyalty, that’s just stupid. 

So in short, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with having inferior intuition. It doesn’t stop you in the least bit from being creative. Your virtue is being grounded, realistic and loyal. You DO have intuition and it’s there to help in your hour of need. Don’t mistype yourself as INxx because bias tests tell you the latter are superhuman. They have their own virtues for sure, but so do you. Celebrate them. ISxJ also have Tert Fi and Ti which is their constant reminder that they are they’re own rebellious person with their personal quirks, not some drone who just goes blindly with what society asks of them.