now playing - valentines_intro.mp3
“I know I haven’t been around for you as often as I would like to be. …Being a manager isn’t as fun and easy as it seems. At least the new experiences have been giving me vague ideas for new songs! Sometimes when I come home and you’re already asleep, I like to hum bits of them to you. It was during one of those late night that I realized what I wanted to give to you for our, what, third Valentine’s together? Isn’t that wild? The end of this year will be our third together- and never once did I think about writing you songs! Maybe I figured it seemed conceited— Well, It does feel a little conceited!”
A sheepish laugh.
“Even when I was recording these songs I felt like I didn’t have the credibility to make a CD of just my playing and give it to you for such an important date.
…
If you think this is cheating just don’t tell me okay? I’m going to make sure future-yeol takes you somewhere extravagant next year.”
The voice is joking, wide grin audible in the deep lilt of his words.
“Right now you’re over at Junmyeon’s. I thought about going over to see you, but I didn’t want to kill the mood. And besides that, I’ve been trying to finish this CD for the past week— you just keep showing up! It’s like you live here or something.”
Soft snorts of impatience fill the silence, drawing out another laugh.
“Can you hear PB? He’s been watching me out of the corner of his eye for the past 15 minutes. I think he’s judging me for taking this long to record what should have been a simple ‘I love you, spud, happy Valentine’s’ intro track. Look at me now. 2 minutes into my 5th take. See what I do for you? All to make sure everything is perfect for my dongsae-.”
The words cut off and he fakes a gag, snickering.
“Ugh, the second I went into that baby voice the regret was real.
But that’s beside the point—
You do know that I love you a lot, right? I tell you all the time, I know. I just hope that you can feel it even when I’m not there. I hope you can feel it in your toes when you slip the shoes on that I tucked against the door to save you time in your morning routine. I hope you can feel it against your lips when you drink the cup of tea I prepared for you before waking you up on my way off to work.”
His strong voice dissolves into something more intimate, delicate.
“I hope you can feel it along your hairline where the sweat gathers during an especially cruel attack, the hairline that I would be pressing reassuring kisses to.
I’m not a doctor. I don’t understand neurology. I don’t understand ophthalmology. Hell, sometimes I feel like I don’t understand basic human biology!
I am a sap, though. I understand why it feels safe to lay beside you or why my eyes are drawn to you, even when we’re lazing around and haven’t spoken a word in hours. I get why my heart skips a beat when our palms touch.
It’s because-“
A puff of breath pops against the mic, a smile trailing after it.
“It’s because it’s trying to get back to the piece you stole from it, unable to understand why it’s missing.
But I know why.
Thank you for keeping it safe.
I love you, spud.”








