Living off Spite

a main sys blog for us lol not agere centered but still NO nsfw CW for weed, cussing, mild derealization, etc. NSFW DNI. U WILL BE REPORTED.

[chaotic-fluffle]

Woe is me, it's us again. hi. This is a main sys blog for all the idiots in our brain.

Although it's not agere centered, NSFW is still STRICTLY PROHIBITED. K//nk accs piss off.

Idgaf if you debate us here, our persecutors love fighting you idiots. We r anti endo, anti radq, against anything harmful or immoral, and our stances will not change. Hail thyself and protect the innocent.

We are a bodily eighteen traumagenic osdd system. We are collectively ace (sx repulsed) , transmasc and a total stoner. You can often see us associating with rabbits, goats, and isopods!

Weed has helped us a LOT in life, honestly. It helps us curb sui & depressive thinking, as well as helps us regress. So like.. shout out to mother nature for making such an awesome yummy plant that makes living more enjoyable :3

Some of our interests: dandys, fnaf (minus everything after the ruin dlc), grace (rblx), animal jam, crk, tawog, scream franchise, South park, crime channels, pokemon, bone collecting, etc...

idc if u don't like the shit we like, everyone has their own tastes and opinions, just don't bash me for liking sp or whatever.

[chaotic-fluffle]

hhhh hate being upset

the thoughts tell me to just... leave. grab my phone and headphones and just disappear for the day without telling anyone. I'll go do everything by myself. I can't rely on other people when no one else cares about me or my wishes.

i love feeling unwanted unless I'm being significantly useful to others ahahhah what a great existence.

[chaotic-fluffle]

comfort show + wake n bake + working on requests and blogs

nice morning

[chaotic-fluffle]

our irl grandfather just called us a smoker.

so. what if. I strangle him. /nsrs/j

no but seriously I'm smoking weed and you have the BALLS to call me a smoker? fuck you.

if we didn't have weed we would be dead. end of story. so shut ur trap old man. 😒👎

—blurry soup

[chaotic-fluffle]

stupid visiting relatives ruining our joint break >:(

how dare u interrupt when the blunt was about to be passed to me? EVIL!!!

[moutaindewdrop]

ALL lolicons are pedophilies.

ALL Shotacons are pedophilies.

ALL pro and Darkshippers will turn into predators one day.

Fiction does affects reality.

[chaotic-fluffle]

honestly losing my fucking mind because no one can keep stable front without issues because people outside of the sys dont give a shit about us lmao

first they manage to trigger a traumaholder, and now I'm convinced that one of the militant ppl are lurking to try and keep us desensitized.

i hate being a system and I hate that having no environmental control in our life makes it even harder to just FUNCTION.

[chaotic-fluffle]

i hate realizing that I've been in a state of fight or flight for like, majority of my life

i feel like the stress is genuinely killing me sometimes lmao

it makes sense though, unfortunately.

[chaotic-fluffle]

confession time

we have biiiig problems with morality ONLY when it comes to cannibalism , and I think it may be because so many of us hold and/or have a lot of intrusive thoughts surrounding that.

In the sense of we find it hard to see it in a fully negative light

Dont get me wrong , I'm not saying it should be normalized or that it's an okay thing

i just like honestly realized this as of late and it has me wondering about things

[anti-willo-fluttergoth]

Shout out to pets of systems! <3

(Mostly because I love our pets)

~Shout out the the service dogs! We appreciate everything you do for you owner with a CDD [and other disabilities]

~shout out the emotional support animals! You also do so much for your owner(s) as well

~shout out to the rescues, your owner(s) are just as lucky to have you as you are to have them.

~shout out to the cats!

~shout out to dogs!

~shout out to the rabbits!

~shout out to the rodents!

~shout out to the reptiles!

~shout out to the birds!

~shout out to the fish!

~shout out to the horses (how dare you have a horse. They're mine now)

~shout out to the animals I missed out! (Sorry)

~shout out to pets who notice shifts in alters. To the ones who have a favourite alter and the ones who love their owner's alters equally.

~shout out to the pets who helped their owner(s) get through abuse or a traumatic time in their life.

~shout out to the pets who are sadly no longer with us. We miss you dearly.

If you'd like to share about your pets feel free! :]

[sys-confessions]

having to tag every sys post with ENDOS DNI ANTI ENDO DNI ENDOS I AM A REAL SYSTEM IM NOT PRETENDING I HATE ENDOS is so annoying i wish they would just Not exist

[chaotic-fluffle]

Why do ppl think this shit is FUN???

like dude I would give anything to be a singlet with no disorders who is able to live a happy life

but I fucking can't, because DISORDERS ARENT A CHOICE. THEY DONT JUST COME OUT OF NOWHERE AND THEY DONT JUST GO AWAY.

its exhausting, having no identity, no connection to whose who are supposed to be our friends and family, feeling like you're running a losing game.

if I had a choice, I would never have chose this. fuck no. this has been the worst experience of my life. being a system isn't fucking fun.

its feeling like you've got no control over your own life, it's not being able to look in the mirror without feeling like you're wearing someone else's skin, it's sobbing for hours because you know you'll never to be able to have the life you want.

knowing you'll never have your own life. that you will always have to share it with those who could easily chose to ruin it. it's instability and days of dissociation.

its not a game. it's not an identity. it's a fucking curse.

[chaotic-fluffle]

when the front isn't frontibg properly /silly

like why messy array of folks at random?

and why headache?

[anti-willo-fluttergoth]

Do nice things for your system!

•buy that colouring book for that little

•let that alter partake in the hobby they rarely get to do

•stock up on that alters favourite snacks

•tidy up your desk for the next alter who uses it

•draw a silly doodle of someone in your system even if you're not a great srtist

•leave a kind message in your journal/wherever you communicate

•share your appreciation for things your system has helped you with

Things are tough but it'll be a little better if you treat yourselves with kindness.

[chaotic-fluffle]

it's hard to be charming and smart and disarming, it's hard to pretend you're the best /lyr

[chaotic-fluffle]

its great having a headache and being blurry and dealing with extreme guilt over shit we shouldn't feel guilty about. /s

i need to work on requests but I'm just ready to bash my brains in and scream at everyone.

siiiiiigh.

[anti-endo-sleepover]

🦄🌙 This is an appreciation post for anti-endo systems🌙🦄

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who work hard on becoming better people !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who got out of bed today despite it taking all of their energy !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who have taken care of their pets today !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who have taken care of their family today !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who have taken care of themselves today !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who have gone to therapy recently !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who make it work without a therapist !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who have taken all of their medicine for the day !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who are fighting and recovering from an addiction !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems who are fighting and recovering from an ED !

💗 I'm proud of you, systems ! The world is better with you in it !